Tethered to You
by outlawqueenbey44
Summary: Robin is in a deep depression after his wife died nearly 3 years ago. What happens if a fairy gives him the chance to find love again...and what happens when he finds out who she is... {trigger mentions will be labelled at the beginning of chapters}
1. Chapter 1

** A Long Time Ago **

The Enchanted Forest

It had been two years, two horrible long years since he had lost his wife, his beautiful Marian. His heart ached for her in the beginning, but now was filled only with emptiness. It was a bleak grey filled life he now wandered through, save for the fact he still had his little son, his Roland. His boy was the only source of light in the darkness that surrounded him. It pained him though every time he gazed upon his son's face, the olive skin, brown curls and big chocolate button eyes. He looked just like his mother.

In the first few months, he had pushed his son away, the familiarity between his departed love and his child tore at him. Over time, his heart fell into a stoned like state. He'd laugh half heartedly at his playful son, smile small as his men made jokes to lift his spirits. It wasn't any real use though, and they knew it. Heartbreak was a brutal fate to deal with. The Merry Men took over care of Roland during the dark first months as Robin recluded into a shell. He tried to pull himself out of the depression, but it was overwhelming in the beginning and he settled instead for a half life, dull and sad.

This is how he lived, walking empty through a life that seemed to not care about his tragedy. The lived in the forest as always, moving from place to place as they continued to steal from the rich and give to the poor.

"PAPA‼ PAPA CATCH ME‼" Robin turned just as his son leapt into his arms, throwing his little arms around his neck as he hugged him tight.

"Hello, my boy. How are we this morning?" He ruffled his son's hair as he smiled at the young toddler.

"John says we are going on another adventure!"

"Did he now!? And what adventure would this be?"

Roland patted his father's stubbly cheeks "He says you are going to the King's castle tonight, can I come Papa? PLEAAASE!?"

Robin's eyebrows furrowed at his son's words. His eyes flickered up to a shameful looking little John who was leaning half hidden behind a tree.

"Papa?"

Anger built in Robin's chest as he threw daggers at his fellow Merry Man. He slowly lowered Roland to the ground, patting the crown of his head.

"Roland, why don't you go find Tuck. I'm sure he needs help getting supper ready"

"But PAPA!" Roland whined out

"ROLAND I SAID GO!" It came out harsher than he intended and he internally cringed as he saw his son flinch before his little legs carried him slowly away.

His breathed a heavy breath, before stalking over to John.

"A word, Little John" He walked straight past his friend and into the thick of the forest lining.

John followed, his body language slumped forward, ready for the verbal assault he was about about to get.

Robin spun around, his eyes wild in rage as he ran his fingers through his hair.

"How could you tell Roland"

"Robin I –"

"NO! John, he is 3 years old! You can't go promising these things to him when you know damn well how dangerous it is‼ You are putting my sons life in danger!" He spit out his words, his breath panting.

"I didn't mean it Robin, the lad pulled it out of me"

Robin scoffed "The last time one of my family members come along on a raid, my wife died"

John's eyes faltered as his big boots kicked dirt on the ground.

"You are a complete idiot you know that John"

He couldn't help the anger, it festered and bubbled into him as he continued to berate the large man in front of him.

"You want Roland to be taken, kidnapped…"

"Robin no –"

"HE COULD DIE JOHN! IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT!?"

A heavy tense silence fell between the two men.

"Robin, you know I would protect Roland with my life. How dare you insinuate that I would want to put him in harm's way"

"But that is exactly what you were about to do!"

John's own defenses began to fly up "Now stop right there!"

"It's like you want me to suffer John!"

It was enough, and John's reflexes took ahold of him, his fist flying into Robin's jaw hard, sending his leader into the ground.

Robin returned the punch with one of his own, and the brawl ensued. Each landed harsh blows to the other before the were ripped apart by other Merry Men.

He could feel blood flowing from his nose, and his ribs ached painfully

"GET OFF ME!"

Alan loosened his grip on Robin before Tuck placed a hand on both mens chest "This is ridiculous. You are family. We do not fight one another‼ What the hell has gotten into you both?"

Either man said anything for a moment.

Johns voice broke the silence first, harsh through his heavy panting breath "He's different now….ever since Marian died"

"Can you blame me?" Robin spat back

"We have all lost someone Robin! My Brother, Alan's parents, Tuck lost his whole family! Just because you lost Marian doesn't give you the right to sulk around and bring the entire camp into this black hole with you!"

Robin's jaw gapped open as he wrenched his body from Alan's grasp.

"You aren't a leader anymore Robin. You are mean, and sharp to everyone. We are only trying to help you mate" Will placed a light hand on Robin's shoulder, hoping to calm the man.

Tuck calmed the tense air with his wisdom voice "Robin, John is right and he is wrong. You have suffered terrible heartbreak and it's not fair. BUT! You have also let it consume you. We need our Robin back, the leader of the Merry Men, our Prince of Thieves"

Robin sighed heavily "I'm Sorry…."

Tuck smiled as he patted Robin's chest "I know lad. But you need to find a way to be happy again"

"I can't be happy without her Tuck" Robin's eyes glistened with tears as his gaze fell from the old man down into the dirt

"Yes you can. You deserve a happy ending Robin. It will happen, you just have to open yourself up to it"

Robin sighed and shook his head, it was impossible, his heart belonged to Marian and Marian alone. His happy ending was gone.

"Let's eat, before the stew gets cold"

The men murmured in agreement.

Robin leaned against a tree, exhaling hard. His eyes flickered up to the black sky, the stars dancing like diamonds

 _Marian….I miss you so much my love…..but they are right….I can't live like this….it's tearing me apart and it's ruining our son's life. Please help me, let me release my guilt over losing you, I need something_.

..

...

...

A few months passed, and Robin did his best to lighten his mood, but he still felt empty. They had decided against going to the King's vault, it was to heavily guarded by knights. Instead they made do but stealing from easier targets, mainly those from the road. It gave Robin some semblance of peace, and his body began to take over his brain, putting him into auto-pilot on each mission. It seemed easier this way.

The fire crackled low as Robin stoked the last few burning embers. The night was chilled, as his breath fogged out in front of him. Suddenly the hairs on the back of his neck stood straight and a strange sensation overtook his body. On reflex he grabbed his bow, anchoring an arrow as his eyes flickered around into the darkness.

"Robin of Locksley" a woman's voice coasted around him from behind and he spun, arrow notched towards the voice.

"Show yourself"

A light red glowing bubble began for form in front of his eyes and for a moment Robin thought maybe he was going crazy as he watched a woman slowly come into form. Her hair was chocolate brown and curled heavy on the top of her head. She had a warm smile that parted on her ebony skin, eyes soothing and soft as her red dress ghosted along the forest floor.

"Who are you?"

She smiled softly at him "My name is Rosetta, and I am here to help you"

"I don't need help from a witch"

The fairy laughed lightly before walking up to him "I am no witch, I am a fairy"

His eyes widened, he knew of fairies, and their magical power, something he wasn't exactly fond of. His eyebrows creased as he raised his bow higher, aiming straight at the woman's heart. "Do not come closer…what is it you want?"

Rosette scanned his tired face, her hand ghosted over his chest and she closed her eyes heavy as she felt the sadness that emanated from him. His heart was barely living, beating only to keep him alive, but not letting him truly live.

"Oh Robin, you need more help than you can barely know"

"I need nothing from you or your magic"

"You sure are stubborn aren't you"

With a wave of her hand, red smoke glided around Robin's hands and his bow disappeared, leaving him defenseless. He scoffed and dropped his hands to the ground.

"Fine. What do you want from me?"

The red fairy glided up to Robin, placing her hands gently in his cheeks "What do you want Robin, that is the real question"

He shook his head and closed his eyes heavy "I don't know what I want"

A light giggle followed his heavy statement and he was about to tell her off but he was taken aback as her magic pulsed through his body, warm and comforting as his basked his heart in a glow he hadn't felt in a long time.

"I think you know exactly what you need"

A stray tear dropped from his eye "That is something you cannot possibly give me. My Marian in gone, there is no love left in this life for me"

Rosette patted his cheeks gently as the last of her magic thrummed in his heart "That is where you are wrong. It's true I can't make people fall in love, but I can show you a happy ending that is within your grasp"

His eyes flicked up and Rosetta's heart broke at the despair she saw swimming in the blue eyes.

"You just have to want to be happy again Robin. You can love. There is a woman out there who needs you just as much as you are needing her right now"

He let a breathy exhale out before putting his hands on her that were still placed on his cheeks.

"I am just not certain"

Rosetta stepped back a touch and twirled her fingers and a red vial appeared in her fingers, golden flakes dancing in the ruby red liquid.

His hands closed around the the glass tube and his eyes stared up in wonder at the red fairy who was beaming at him.

"This will lead you to your soulmate, and what you decide to do at that point is up to you. But I ask that you try to open your heart to the possibility of love again. It is in you"

Robin nodded and the fairy kissed his cheek before she began to fade

"Thank You, Rosetta"

"You are welcome, let me know how it goes!"

He was left with a lasting light laughter and the lingering effect of her magic that bloomed in his heart.

He twirled the bottle in his fingers, and his mind wandered….far out to the potential woman that was waiting for him, maybe she needed him to….but a lick of uncertainty bubbled in him. He was a thief, he couldn't provide a stable home being nomad with his band of mismatched men and his toddler. What woman would want to fall into his life….he grimaced at put the red vial into his jacket pocket. He would deal with it later, his future could wait, but his past was about to catch up.


	2. Chapter 2

**_**3 Days before Daniel Died**_**

"C'mon Chivalte faster boy‼" his horse thundered down the forest path as Robin urged him forward. It had been so long since he was allowed to just ride out and in the open. The summer air blew through his blonde hair as he soaked in the warm sun. Days like these were getting fewer and farther in between with winter on the arrival. Soon the horses would have to be homed in the stables and riding free like this wouldn't be available for months.

He pulled on the reigns, whipping the horse to the right, spurring the stallion on into a full gallop. Robin laughed breathlessly at the feeling. Horses were truly the most magnificent of animals. They raced on through the forest and into a clearing. The sunshine that radiated off the still lake danced like diamonds on its cool surface. Slowing his horse to a light trot, Robin made way over to the water.

He slipped down and patted Chivalte on his dark brown nose, the horses nudging him further. He cherished this horse, it was his only true friend. Whispers and secrets passed between them, ones no one else would ever know. The stallions hair was smooth under Robin's palm, his fingers scratching against the bright white marking between the horse's eyes.

 _It was years ago he begged his father to save the young horse. He had stumbled onto the injured animal while walking through the forest, it had a deep gash on the side of it's haunch from some sort of wolf attack. The sight of blood flared nausea through Robin, but the connection he felt when he walked over and looked the horse in the eyes tugged at his heart strings. His father told him the young buck wouldn't last through the night, but Robin was determined. He hoisted the horse onto his cart with the help of his father and uncle, and pulled it himself back to the cottage. He cleaned the wound as best as he could before laying bandages across the gash. His father chuckled at the sight and told Robin not to get to attached and come crying to him in the morning when the horse was gone._

 _He was only 14 at the time…but Robins determination was stronger than his father lack of faith. He slept in the stables that night, brushing the horses matted hair, singing him songs late into the night. He worried at the pain the horse must be feeling, but something inside him knew he would survive._

 _The thrummed over names for hours, he wanted something strong, that had resonance and meaning behind him. His father always spoke about how knights should be loyal to their code, have honor, courage and courtesy. "What about Chivarly?" He whispered to the horse … no response…. Robin took that as a sign the horse didn't agree…. "Chiva?" … silence…. He hummed and his face bloomed into a smile "Chivalte?" and to the young boys astonishment, the horse huffed out a breath._

 _"CHIVALTE it is‼"_

 _His fingers parted through the white hair shaped as a oak leaf birth mark on the horse's forehead. It was almost destiny that Robin find this horse. The mark was beautiful and reminded Robin of the forest, where he thrived. He slept in the stables that night, restless, his heart hoping to the Gods his new friend would make it._

 _Sunrise flickered through the stable, blaring brightly across Robin's closed eyes. He grimaced, his back sore from sleeping on the hard ground. Instantly he turned to face the horse, and his heart sang as he was met with a pair of deep chocolate eyes._

 _"You're awake!" He crawled over, hugging the young stallion as his fingers brushed through the chestnut mane._

 _"He's still with us, I'm surprised" Marcus' strong voice rang through the stables and Robin jumped to his feet, running to pull his father into the wooden hay room._

 _"I told you!"_

 _He patted his son on the shoulder, a warm smile brimming his face "I suppose I was wrong. I'm proud of you Robin."_

 _His heart swelled at his fathers rarely given appreciation and he walked back to his animal friend, who nuzzled his palm in affection._

 _.._

 _..._

 _..._

He splashed water on his face, a shiver running through his body at the cool temperature. Chivalte drank deeply beside him as Robin sat back down on the bank. It truly was a breath-taking day. He pulled blades of grass from the ground and began to mindless braid them, pulling green strand over green strand. His fingers were delicate against the fragile blades as he twined them together.

His calming silence was interrupted by a far distanced noise, it almost sounded like a women crying….but as he looked around his eyes found no one. His forehead creased as he stood to his feet, looking around further. His heart skipped a beat when he saw a young woman leaning heavily on a tree at the water's edge a fair distance from him.

Her shoulders wracked with each sob and his heart pained for her sorrow. He always had a knack for needing to help those in need. His father claimed it was the "Locksley" in him, a name that rang true in its humbleness. His mother would roll her blue eyes and chuckle back that it was because of her that their son had a heart of gold.

He slowly walked towards the woman from behind, her hair was gorgeously long, thick in a heavy braid, chocolate in richness. She was petite, he could tell from the blue riding coat she wore, it clung tight to her body, and flared out at her hips, covering her backside which was clothes in tan riding pants. He was no more than a few feet behind her, his hand reaching out to gently touch her shoulder. The woman spun on the spot, her eyes filled with fear for a moment as she clutched her arms to her body.

His heart stopped beating for a minute, she was the most beautiful girl he had ever seen. Through the puffy red rimmed eyes he could see the whiskey color of her eyes, her lips were full and tinted rose, he noted the deep scar on the upper lip. Her skin was flawless, smooth like silk in it's bronzed color, her cheekbones cut high and shaded a light pink. If there were such things as angel, he was certain he was looking at one right now. She was stunning.

"It's rude to stare you know" Her voice was shaky, but the husky sweet tone flooded his ears.

Robin hadn't realized that a full minute had passed during his moment of shock…

His voice choked in his throat as he battled to find words, laughing at himself he ran his extended hand in front of him, back over his face, and through his blonde hair. Chuckling he simply smiled at the girl.

"What's so funny?" She asked with a hint of annoyance.

He bit his lower lip and stepped forward once again, feeling suddenly calm around this beauty "I'm sorry Milady, but I heard you crying and I wanted to make sure you were alright"

Her eyebrows arched in minor surprise, but narrowed quickly "It's none of your business whether I am fine or not"

She had fire in her, Robin always liked fire.

He stepped closer once more, closing the gap between the two young teenagers.

"I apologize" He simply said, extending his hand out in gesture.

She stared at him for a minute, her eyes battling emotions that Robin couldn't start to understand. Her breath was stalled when she had turned around to see who the stranger behind her was…her heart skipped when she saw the boy…no man smiling at her. He was maybe in his late teens as she, possible an early twenty, the muscles of his arms and chest were prominent through the white tunic he wore. He was a good foot taller than she was, but for a strange reason she didn't feel intimidated by his size. Her eyes coasted up his built frame, his jaw was solid and yet soft at the same time, lips were oddly attractive in their thin thin. His hair curled flowed behind his ears gently, blonde like the sun. He was obviously incredibly handsome, but it was his eyes that held her for the longest. Blue like the ocean, and her heart beat hard against her chest as she stared into them, so full of compassion and light.

Shaking her head she didn't really hear herself speak, or his replies until his hand was jutted out in front of her as some kind of gesture of friendship…but she didn't have friends. She had Daniel and Rocinante. That was it.

 _Oh God Daniel!_ Her mind suddenly snapped from it's frozen state and she recoiled her hand, not quite realizing that it was nearly grasped into the strangers palm.

"I'm sorry, I have to go" She went to brush by him, but Robin caught her arm and a momentary tingle flushed through her. Her breath hitched at the strange sensation, as her eyes flickered up to the boy's face, his own expression of surprise matching hers as he stared down at his grip on her arm.

There was something strange about this boy, inviting and safe about his blue eyes and sincere smile. Their eyes met briefly before she turned from him, sliding her arms from his hand, the tingling sensation following the path of his fingers as he let her go.

"I didn't mean to frighten you"

"I'm not frightened" she retorted back heatedly.

He shrugged in acceptance of her answer, though he didn't believe it he wouldn't press her when she was obviously uncomfortable.

"Care to join me?"

"What?"

He moved to an oak tree, settling himself down and smiled crookedly back at the girl. Her eyes widened in uncertainty as she stared at him.

"What are you doing?"

"Simply enjoying the sunshine Milady, you should do the same" He patted the grass beside him. She stood still for a moment, unsure of what to do, but her body apparently made up it's mind as she found herself slowly walking towards him, and settling down a little closer than she anticipated. His shoulder bumped her as he leaned back into the tree trunk. He could feel her body stiff as a board beside him and he wandered his eyes around her face. She chewed her bottom lip in some sort of anxious trait, her finger of one hand picking at the nail beds of the other. She was nervous and he didn't want that.

Reaching beside him, he pulled out 5 thick long strands of meadow grass and passed them to her. She stared back at him questioning and he simply nodded and let her grab them. Picking up 5 more strands for himself he tied them in a knot and began to braid them together.

She watched him for a quiet minute, taking in how his fingers seemed so smooth and careful with the grass. She stared back down at the blades in her own hands and follow suit. They sat quiet for a few minutes, twining the blades into long ropes.

"Do you want to talk about it?" He finally broke through the silence.

She sighed heavily and he wished he could take away her obvious pain….but he didn't know this girl….he was a stranger to her….so the hand he so itched to rub her back with stayed in his lap, wrapping blade over blade.

"I just had a fight with my mother that's all"

He hummed and twitched his nose thinking of a response…but his own mother always said a woman will talk when she wants to. So he waited quietly beside this beauty of a girl.

Another minute ticked by and he smiled as he heard her exhale out her voice seeming more steady this time "She's awful….. completely heartless ….I'm pretty sure she doesn't actually love me"

He raised an eyebrow behind her at that last statement, surely that couldn't be true…what mother didn't love her children?

"Nothing I do is good enough, I disappoint her by just being around her. It's exhausting" She closed her eyes and leaned back into the tree trunk.

"I don't know why I am telling you this" She hummed out in retrospection

"I think you want to talk about it"

"What makes you think you know me so well"

He sighed beside her and turned his head so his eyes could find her face, but they caught her open wondering eyes instead. He smiled "Who better to talk to than a complete stranger that can't judge you?"

She half smirked at his remark before ghosting her eyes back down to her half finished green braid.

"She wants me to be something I am not. She is callous and crude and I can't deal with it anymore" Her voice hitched on the last words as her eyes filled in tears again. She hastily wiped them away before they could fall, focusing her attention back on the blades in her fingers.

He debated for a moment whether he should continue to ask her about her obvious turmoil over her mother…but he wasn't sure if she truly wanted to talk about it.

"Do you know how to skip rocks Milady?"

"What?" Her eyes furrowed as she cocked her head to meet his gaze.

He stood up quickly and nodded his head towards the lake "Trust me"

For a second she just stared at him….. _trust me_ …..it felt odd but she strangely did trust this handsome guy standing in front of her. She stood up slowly and followed him down to the lake. He handed her a handful of rocks before gathering up some of his own.

He smiled at her before turning to the glass surface, and with a flick of his wrist he sent a rock skipping across the lake, leaving ringlets in it's path.

"It's not hard, just hold it flat and twist your wrist when you through it"

She half laughed at him before sending her own rock three jumps further than his. A lick of pride ran through her as she giggled at his astonished expression.

"Well, I beg your pardon Milady…." He chuckled at her.

It turned into a competitive game, each of them trying to out skip, out throw and out toss the other. They laughed together as the warm sun beat down on them. An hour dragged past before she watched him big up a ridiculously large rock…

"You think you can skip that? You are crazy" She huffed in play at him.

"Not skip, just throw like an ogre" He launched the boulder exceptionally far for it's size, the splash and deep plunk sound of the water breaking at its contact echoed through the meadow.

"Should I be impressed?"

He laughed lightly and gestured to a smaller but still large rock beside her.

"It feel good to throw something heavy … releases some inner tension …. Trust me"

There is was again …. _trust…._ She eyed him over once more, his dimples were heavy set against his small closed lip smile….her heart picked up a beat at those dimples… _god they are cute_ …..She shook her mind away from those thoughts…and turned to pick up the heavy rock.

She stared at it for a moment, letting all her anger and anguish soak into it from her palms….with a step back and a fairly loud yell, she launched the boulder into the water, reveling in the sinking of the stone as is disappeared.

She smiled sadly as she stared out into the lake "You're right, that does make me feel better"

"That's what I am here for" He responded in kind.

Minutes ticked on without either of their notice, they got lost in conversation about sweet nothings. How freezing the lake would be to swim in, the change in seasons, she loved the winter, he hated it….. she likes apples, has her own apple tree at home….he prefers oranges. She was 17, he was 19…she was an only child, he had one older brother. The list went on, the small details of their lives coming out in between the throwing of rocks and the braided on grass blades.

Robin could feel his heart blooming with each syllable she dropped. She was gorgeous, and he couldn't help himself from just looking at her. It was obvious there was serious emotional battles going on within, but he could see her lightness that shone through her eyes on occasion, the way her laugh would echoed through the meadow or the dazzling smile she would send him here and there.

She was a flame, and he the moth. The internal pull to her nearly overwhelmed him as he sat down beside her on the grass.

"Thank You" her voice just above a whisper

"For what Milady?"

"Just listening I suppose. Taking my mind off of everything. It was nice to not think about my mother for an hour"

"I think it's been longer than an hour"

Suddenly her face darted to the sky, the sun was at least bordering the western tree line

"It's been at least 4 hours‼! Oh my god‼" She frantically pushed to her feet, whirling around in a panic.

"I should have been home hours ago….." She tugged at her jacket as she began to pad away from him

"Care for an escort?"

She half laughed half scoffed at the boy through her panic, why was he being so kind to her, this perfect stranger, and a sudden fear licked through her veins "My mother sent you didn't she"

The change of tone in her voice, from soft to terrified stunned Robin as he shook his head, pouting his lower lip out "No Milady, I was just riding my horse when I heard you"

She furrowed her eyebrows…she'd never seen him before….maybe he was telling the truth….but she couldn't take that chance.

"I have to go" She spun on the spot and began to walk back towards the forest.

For a moment, Robin watched her go, obviously the girl didn't want him around and he wouldn't impose on her. Yet there was something about this beauty that pulled his heart strings. Surely love at first sight wasn't true….was it?

He licked his dry lips, closing his eyes in slight anxiety before he called out to her "Milady!"

She stopped and turned her face to his, her thin eyebrow arched in question.

He jogged the few paces between them "Forgive me, but it wouldn't be appropriate of me to let you just wander off alone"

"What makes you think I need your help?" Her voice retorted back in annoyance, but he could hear the undertone of playfulness.

Smiling he shrugged "You probably don't, but I insist that you allow me the privilege to at least see you to your home"

"Why?"

Robin exhaled, she was stubborn that was for certain but the thrumming of his heart bloomed in his chest. She was incredible.

"Soothe my anxious heart please…. I wouldn't feel right letting you go by yourself, there are dangerous things in this forest"

 _None more dangerous than my mother who will be furious when she finds out I ran away…again…_ Her eyes closed as she let out a heavy breath.

She wondered for a half minute about the strange sensation his palm elicited on her skin, maybe he had magic? Somewhere in her soul she shook of that answer, magic didn't feel like that. It didn't feel light and calming as his touch did. Magic was painful and held a burning sensation, like pins and needles driving into your veins. No, he didn't have magic….but there was something she couldn't quite figure out.

"If you allow, my horse is just a few marks back" Robin flicked his gaze over to the impressive stallion who stood still in the meadow.

"Fine" she breathed out, waving her hand slightly in acknowledgement. She expected the boy to run out to his horse, but he whistled a melodic three tone tune and the horse immediately responded, trotting up to the pair.

Her eyes widened at the display….even with how closely connected her and Rocinante were, that was impressive.

"Wow….you've trained him quite well" She smiled out as the horse came to a gentle stop meeting Robin's extended palm in greeting.

Robin smiled "His name is Chivalte"

"Chivalte?" She questioned him

"I named him after the idea of having Chivalry, being courageous, kind and loyal"

The girl hummed in response "He's beautiful"

 _You are beautiful_ … the words nearly slipped from his mouth as he watched the young girl's eyes light up, and a breathtaking smile pulled across her face as his stallion nuzzled her neck. The giggle that escaped her set Robin's heart on fire. He could die this moment and be the happiest he's ever been.

"He's quite the charmer" She patted the stallion's nose, "Rocinante would like you"

"Who?"

"My Mare"

"Ahh. You ride around here often?" He questioned, hoping the answer was yes…and maybe he could tempt this angel into meeting him again.

Her face fell, the brilliant smile fading as her eyes closed for a moment. Her voice hitched as she whispered "No"

He saw a tear fall from her thick dark eyelashes and without thinking his thumb brushed it away. Her eyes sparked open at the contact as she stared up at him. The warm tingle blazing through her skin where his thumb pushed away the tear. She could see his eyes fill in curiosity and wonder and she knew that he was feeling the same thing.

Their eyes connected again and she felt herself leaning into him and her heart stuttered as she watched him close the gap. Their noses bumped lightly, his thumb now caressing across her cheekbone. Their eyes danced as they remained locked to one another, both pairs flickering with uncertainty but at the same time absolute certainty. Robin smiled as he bit his lower lip, his thick voice whispering around her skin "You are stunning Milady"

She blushed and smiled back at him, her own voice barely a whisper "Thank You"

He swallowed hard as his eyes darted down to her ruby full lips, parted lightly as she took shallow inhales. Time seemed to stand still for a minute as they stood together in the meadow, the late sun glowing around them in a warm embrace. Robin tucked a curled lock of hair behind her ear as he reveled in her beauty.

He desperately wanted to kiss her, but he was a man of honor. Though his heart thrashed hard against his chest, he wouldn't dare make another move until the girl did. It would be her choice and he resonated that statement in his mind.

She wasn't sure what was happening….her heart beat at a furious pace as she got lost in the boys drowning blue eyes. He had a small scar on his temple, and her fingers itched to touch it, to push his blonde hair out of his eyes. For a moment she let herself get lost in the wonderment of what it would be like to kiss him, he felt so safe, so pure to her. Her mind battled her back though…this wasn't right, he was a stranger….she stood still for a moment before giving in to her heart, she tilted her chin a breath higher, smiling shyly at him as she slowly closed the distance.

His heart was bursting in his chest, as he watched her lean in impossible close. Her apple scent infiltrated him, her warm body leaning in tighter to his, she was merely a blade of grass width of distance from his lips. He turned his chin down, and parted his lips.

They brushed gently together and a incredible buzzing flew through their bodies at the slight contact. She smiled and he breathed out a shocked exhale, but either moved from their position. He could feel the tingling on his lips as his hands fell to her hips, her own placing gently on his chest.

His body felt alive, whatever this sensation was it was coursing through him like fire.

She internally shivered at the molten heated zapping that ran down her spine., flaring through her heart as it overtook her.

He leaned back down to her, and she lifted herself onto her tip toes.

"BBBBBRRRRRRRPPPH"

They jumped apart at the horse's huff, his hoof stamping against the ground in impatience.

Her skin flushed in embarrassment as she flickered her eyes up to his. She smiled as she saw his own skin blushing back as he smiled softly at her.

"Seems' Chivalte isn't one for timing" She chuckled and he laughed out heartedly in return.

"I suppose not" He grabbed the horse's reigns as he winked at the woman beside him.

"I should probably get home"

"Let me walk with you"

"You are incredibly persistent you know that" She smirked

"And you are a bit on the stubborn side" He jested back, and his heart skipped a beat at the incredulous expression that claimed her face.

"Ha….Just don't get in my way" Her whiskey brown eyes caught his ocean blue as she smirked through her demand.

"I wouldn't dream of it" He smiled back and her heart stumbled for a beat. His smile was so sincere.

They walked in silence through the forest, his eyes constantly moving to hers, hoping he would catch her gaze, but she seemed focused on the road ahead and he grimaced at the lack of contact between them. Maybe he had pushed her to far, they didn't know each other, maybe she felt uncomfortable now.

Her mind raced as she stared out into the pathway, half of her wanted nothing more than to ask the man beside her to run away, take her from the hell hole of a life she was living…but she didn't even know him, or his name for that matter. She battled herself for a minute, wondering about the stranger beside her. She shouldn't feel this pull towards him, she had Daniel. Her wonderful, sweet, loving Daniel. Guilt washed over her as her memory reminded her of the near kiss she had just shared with a complete stranger.

She berated herself for letting it get that far.

No, no matter what this strange connection to the blonde boy beside her was she loved Daniel, and wouldn't leave him. They were going to be together forever, he was her happy ending, her love and her life.

But she never felt that buzzing sensation with Daniel….the feeling of heated warmth running through her veins…the shiver of magic that flowed through her heart. Her eyes quickly flicked up to the boy who walked beside her, his eyes soft as he smiled back at her.

Her heart beamed for a second but she couldn't …. no, she shook off the feeling quickly and trained her eyes back to the path that was beginning to widen as they approached the hill hiding the Mills Mansion.

She chewed her lip, wondering if the boy would find it ridiculous that a high born girl was having a panic attack because she didn't want her life. She couldn't deny it that she had everything she needed in terms of necessity. A large roof over her head, endless food whenever she wanted, a stable all her own, she knew she was living a better life than many. Her eyes wandered over the boy's attire, fixating on the light dirt that speckled the white tunic, the sewed patches in his green trousers where it had obviously been torn.

He wasn't high born….he was probably a farmer's son. She didn't want him to see her differently, she her as a poor spoiled little rich girl. Stopping in her tracks before the last few trees she turned to him

"My house is just over that hill, I am fine to walk the rest alone"

He could see the whirling of emotions in her eyes, the way she chewed her lower lip in anxious nature.

"Are you certain, I don't mind"

She shook her head quickly "No, truly. Thank You though"

His heart clenched, as the reality that this was goodbye suddenly sank in….he didn't want a goodbye….he barely had a hello….

She swallowed hard and extended out her delicate hand to him just as he had down a few hours prior.

He smile sadly but took her hand into his own palm, and brought it to his lips, pressing a chaste kiss against them as he held her eyes.

"It's been a pleasure Milady"

He was dropping her hand when he saw a dark birthmark on her wrist, and it seemed almost involuntarily to his control that his fingers brushed back her blue riding jacket sleeve. It was small, but shaped like a leaf, almost eerily similar to the one Chivalte had on his forehead. His fingers traced the mark for a second, the intensity of the warm stinging sensation invading his own body.

She watched as he held her wrist, his eyes focusing intently on her mark..her mother thought it was ugly, a tainting to her skin, but she loved it in secret. It was like nature was claiming her, setting her free somewhere else.

She licked her lips before gently pulling her hand from his.

"I'm sorry, I-" his voice stumbled out

"It's okay….it's not exactly the prettiest of markings" She heavily replied as she tugged down her sleeve.

He was shocked at her response "I rather like it Milady" he smiled crookedly at her, and she blushed in return.

"In fact, I have on of my own" He beamed out cheerfully, pulling back his white sleeve.

Her eyebrows arched as she took in the black ink, a white lion standing on hind legs roaring out into the dark tattoo.

"Of course, mine isn't a beauty mark, but that of my namesake" He chuckled before dropping his sleeve.

"It suits you" She smiled.

They stood for a moment, either unable to willingly walk away. He reached out for her hand once more, intertwining their fingers as he smiled at her. She truly was breathtaking especially when she smiled at him the way she was right now.

 _Ask her to meet you again you fool‼ SAY SOMETHING‼_

He bit down on his lip once more and she internally glowed at the nervous trait he obviously had….strangely similar to her own.

"Milady, I-"

"WHERE YOU ARE‼!"

A shrill voice cracked through their perfect moment and she recoiled from him as though burned by fire. Her demeanor instantly changing, he could swear he saw her begin to tremble as her eyes widened at the voice.

She stared back at the boy for a second, wishing for their moment to never have been broken….but she couldn't run from her nightmare. She smiled sadly and retracted from him, as she began to turn away, with a sad "I'm Sorry" falling quietly from her lips.

His heart jumped and his hand reached out and clutched hers once more as he spun her around, hauling her into his arms. He kissed her with everything he could, pressing his lips firmly to her plush ones. His fingers carded through her hair as he held her tight to him. She thought her heart may explode from the sensation, as she kissed him back, her hands threading through his blonde hair at the nape of his neck, his own arms now hugging her tight around her ribcage.

He tasted like mint, fresh mint and forest.

"I SWEAR IF I HAVE TO COME FIND YOU‼‼" the high pitched voice pierced through the forest once more, aggravatingly closer than before.

She pulled away from him slowly recapturing her breath, as he rested his forehead to hers.

"What's your name?" she heard him whisper against her lips

She closed her eyes breathing in his forest smell, it was so calming.

"Robin"

"What" her eyes glanced up to his in minor confusion.

He smiled that sweet smile that set her heart on fire "My name is Robin"

She brushed her fingers against his temple, trailing the light scar. This was so odd, beautifully concerning….. what was happening to her….. why did she feel this electric tug to a perfect stranger…. She began to get lost in his eyes, their sparkling blue holding her to the ground as though she might float away….

The thundering of hooves pulled her from her daze and she pulled out from his arms.

"I'm sorry. I really need to go"

She turned and began to run down the hill

"Wait!" He called after her….

She twirled around, smiling at him.

"REGINA!" she shrugged as she laughed lightly before tearing down the hill and out of his line of sight.

He leaned heavily against his Stallion, her name like a dream surrounding him.

He licked his lips, the light vanilla and spice taste of her still lingering.

 _Regina_

He would come back for this girl, as soon as he could, he would see her shining whiskey eyes once more and feel those lips pressed against his, setting his heart on fire.

..

...

...

It had been three days his father had punished him to work…reprimanding him for leaving for hours on end without so much as a notice of where he was or when he would be back.

Marcus thought it would do the boy good, this labour punishment but for whatever confusing reason, Robin couldn't wipe the dumb smile off his face. Where ever the boy went he was smiling, humming gently to himself, twiddling sticks and braiding grass, his mind far off somewhere else.

Marcus knew that look, he wore it himself. The love of his life, Elena was the one woman in all the realms that would elicit that look from his usual stern face. His son was in love.

He walked over to his son, who was chopping wood for the hearth "Robin, have a break my son"

Obligingly Robin dropped the axe, wiping sweat from his brow and he took the glass of water his father extended to him. They sat side on the hill, facing their home.

"Who is she?"

Robin's heart stopped for a moment…. "Who is who?"

Marcus chuckled as he lightly punched his son in the chest "Please, you look like a love sick puppy dog"

Robin smiled as he shook his head "I don't know what you're talking about Pop"

"Aye, Come off. Tell me!... I'll tell your mother if you don't give it up right now!"

"Okay Okay" Robin threw his hands up in surrender.

He exhaled as his memory took over…. "I met her three days back in the meadow down by the lake…..she was alone and I offered her assistance to walk home"

"That's it…..c'mon lad give me the good stuff. Is she pretty?"

"Stunning in every way" Robin smiled.

Marcus rolled his eyes as he let out a bellowing laugh, his son the romantic would say something full of adoration and mushy love stuff.

"Oiy! You can't laugh! I am being bribed into telling you!" Robin poked his father in the arm harshly.

"Okay, I'm sorry, please continue to tell me about this stunning girl who has stolen your heart"

"I gave it willingly actually"

Marcus' eyebrows raised in question

"My heart, she didn't steal it, I gave it to her"

His father patted him on the back and smiled at him. "Whats her name?"

"Regina"

For a moment Marcus didn't reply…..

"As in Regina Mills? The Stewards daughter?"

Robin turned to his father, his own confused expression pulling across his face "I don't know…..I-" his mind wandered….she was wearing exceptionally nice clothing for a commoner…. The architect of her sentence structure was surely more educated than his own….and then she wouldn't let him walk her all they way to her house….over the hill…..

His heart dropped….over the hill to the Mill's Mansion.

"Oh Robin….you sure know how to pick em" Marcus squeezed his shoulder gently. "I'm sorry lad….but I heard that yesterday the family packed up and moved to King Leopold's Castle"

"WHAT!"

"That's what John said at the pub last night. Apparently young Regina is to marry the King"

Robin scrambled to his feet, his heart pumping furiously in his chest. Surely there had to be some mistake….this wasn't true….

"He's got to be three times her age‼!" He yelled out in panic, is finger flying through his hair at the preposterous thought that his Regina was marrying that old man.

Marcus shook his head, his eyes clouding over in a strange conflicted emotion .

"You're right. He is old enough to be her grandfather….not exactly a match out of love"

"What do I do?" Robin wrung his hands together, staring at his father for some answer.

Marcus rose slowly from his seating position, his palms heavily placed on Robin's shoulders as he stared into his son's wild eyes.

"There is nothing you can do Robin. She is to marry the King"

"NO! Dad, please!"

"I'm sorry my boy…..I truly am. For both your sakes"

Robin pulled back from his father, spinning on the spot and racing to his stable.

"ROBIN‼ WHERE ARE YOU GOING?"

"I HAVE TO SEE HER‼" He saddled Chivalte with haste as he swung his body onto the stallion, rearing him into a gallop. They raced past the house, into the forest, thundering down the pathway. He urged his horse on with everything he could, the stallion responding in kind as he rampaged faster. His heart was relentlessly pounding in his chest, his breathing hitching as oxygen failed to find his lungs.

This had to be a mistake…..there was no way she was gone….she couldn't be…..

They tore on and he slapped the horse's rear with the whip as they crossed the hill, the massive mansion coming into view finally. He flew towards the stables, dismounting Chivalte on the run as he raced to the thick wooden door.

"REGINA!?" His fist pounded at a furious rate.

"REGINA‼ ARE YOU THERE?" His voice booming out as he left the door to search through the windows.

The home was empty….not a soul in sight as he ran around the home, desperate to find entrance at some point. He saw a window on the second floor open and he scramble instantly up the wooden trellis, shoving the pane of glass open as he jumped into the room.

He stuttered for a moment….this had to be her room. It was huge, a large canopy bed in the far corner surrounded by vanities and closets filled with dresses and riding attire. He walked around the room for a minute, breathing in her apple smell that so heavily lingered in the space. He treaded over to her vanity, a near empty jewellery box open on the side. His fingers skimmed over the last golden necklace that lay alone in the velvet box. It was a light golden chain with a small feather hanging at the bottom. It was oddly beautiful in it's simplicity… and he clutched it to his chest. For no reason he consciously understood, he fastened the chain around his own neck, tucking it into the nape of his chest where it lay hidden under his green shirt.

He proceeded to run through the house, empty in every room. His eyes stung with tears as the revelation that she was indeed gone began to settle in.

"Excuse Me!" A low voice echoed from behind him.

He jumped in shock, his hands raised in surrender. The man in front of him was old, older than his own father. He was short, grey hair crowned his head, and his eyes were….they were whiskey brown just like Regina's…..

Robin's breath caught as he stared at the man who had to be her father.

"What are you doing in my home?" He asked softly to Robin's surprise.

He stuttered "I … uh …I was looking for someone"

The older man grimaced a sad smile "For my daughter?"

Robin nodded his head in acknowledgment, his heart suddenly hopeful that maybe she was still here.

"I'm afraid my daughter no longer lives here" His voice was heavy and dripping in anguish.

His jaw dropped at the same time his heart did.

 _No….please no…..don't let this be true…_

The older man walked towards him, "I don't know who you are….but I am grieved to say that Regina has been married off to the King…she won't be returning….." His dark brown eyes flickered the remnants of tears as he pursed his lips.

The world suddenly felt to heavy….it was closing in on him….sucking out the light and oxygen…she was gone.

The older gentlemans' face furrowed in a mix of confusion and pain. He didn't know who this boy was….his daughter clearly never mentioned him… he knew about Daniel….his heart broke at the thought of the poor stable boy, who now lay under a grave over the hill top…. But this boy in front of him was new….He walked slowly to the shocked young man, and rested a heavy heavy palm on his shoulder… their eyes met in matching pain.

Robin's heart was cracking at the seams….

He didn't realize he said it till the words fell…..

"But I love her….."


	3. Chapter 3

"Robin, you can't be serious lad" Marcus huffed out in desperation to his son who was paying him apparently no mind, as he loaded the chestnut stallion, strapping the stirrups on lastly.

The older man walked behind his son, a firm hand placing on his shoulder

"What exactly do you plan to do?...Steal her away from the King?….Run off into the sunset together?..."

His heart was racing as he fastened the reigns onto his horse, his father's words boiling his blood to a tipping point as he desperately tried to focus on the task at hand.

"Jesus Robin! Have some sense of mind, you will be killed for treason and more than likely so will she"

"STOP! JUST STOP TALKING!" Robin beat his hands against the leather saddle in frustration. His breath pulled heavy as his eyes closed, his mind only flashing to her.

"I'm not letting you do this Robin"

"You don't really have a choice, I am 19, not some young boy anymore"

Marcus frowned as he pulled his palm away from his son's shoulder, "I don't understand this, You are willingly to risk your life for a girl you don't even know"

 _But I do know her….I know her laugh…. her smile…..the pain in her eyes….the taste of her lips….._ His mind flooded with her, every detail of her perfect face resonated deep in him.

He sighed heavily before turning around, "You did the same with mom….." a small smirk pulling at his lips. His blue eyes begged his father's own for understanding. His father's face grimaced into a tight smile in reciprocation, before he sighed deeply "Robin, your mother wasn't betrothed to the King….it is completely different"

Robin shook his head, "It doesn't matter, this is all wrong. The King is nearly three times her age, it's not right"

"It's not for you to decide her fate Robin. Royal marriages are tricky complex things, best not to be meddled in"

"It's not a marriage father. Marriage is for love, do you really think the King will love her as she should be…." His eyebrows rising in baiting question, "can you honestly tell me, this King will cherish her as she deserves?"

Marcus smiled sad and small at his son, a boy who had now turned into a grown man, a son a father would be proud to have. He was full of courage, and loyalty, but it was his heart that was truly the golden point.

Robin took his father's silence as response "You know as well as I that she doesn't deserve to be married off to him"

His father scoffed "Robin, he is the bloody King! The girl will want for nothing, she will have everything her heart asks, is that such a terrible fate?"

His heart sank at his father's words, maybe he was right….maybe this marriage wouldn't be the worst thing for her….though it was for him, his heart had apparently laid its stake on her and there was no turning back from that.

Robin grasped his father's sturdy forearm and smiled "I promise you, that I won't do anything reckless"

Marcus snorted "besides try to steal away the King's new bride?"

Robin laughed lightly "Well yes….but in truth all I need to know is if she is okay, and if she is then I will leave her to her new life and come home"

"And if she isn't?"

He stared at his father for a moment, the battle between his heart and mind waging a heavy war inside. Half of him knew this was crazy, and yet half of him didn't care. But if she asked him to save her, he would, and that would mean a life on the run….he wouldn't get to see his family again. And if they were caught, they would surely be punished by death.

Instead of answering what they both knew the end result of this conquest may be, Robin simply pulled his father into a strong embrace, letting the whiskey and woodsy smell of his father surround him one last time.

"Be safe" Marcus whispered into his ear as he patted him heavily on the back. He pulled back and turned from his son before the younger man could see the tears that were building up in a father's eyes. Love was a difficult things, Marcus knew all too well the lengths most people would go to, he had just hoped his son's journey would have been much simpler, but when are things about Love ever simple.

Robin swung his leg over Chivalte, the stallion giving him a huff of acknowledgement before Robin pulled the reigns and the pair charged off into the morning sun.

"Marcus?" his wife's sweet voice called out to him from the house that lay behind the stables. He let his last few tears fall before turning around to her with a wide smile. His hand extended out to hers, and she returned his smile as her slender fingers intertwined with his. He stared down at their hands for a moment, feeling the warmth between them. His Elena was the light of his life, and he had fought for her every damn day.

Her soft palm reached up and rested on his face, pulling at the light gray stubble on his jaw. Their eyes met in a tearful exchange and a sad knowing that they would possibly never see their son again.

Her voice shook slightly as she leaned into his broad chest, his thick arms encircling her …. "He's gone isn't he?"

He kissed her temple, and inhaled her smell of flour and peaches, his fingers brushed through her blonde hair that streaked with grey at its roots. He sighed heavily "Yes"

"Do you think he will come home?" Her green eyes searched up to his deep set blue.

His heart sank at the expression of pure worry and fear on Elena's face. He shook his head slightly and placed a gentle kiss to her forehead "I hope we do, and yet, I hope he saves her…. Which would mean we may not, but he does love her so I hope for his happiness…."

"That damn love" she chuckled sadly into his chest. He smiled into the crown of her hair…. "That damn love" he whispered back.

He raced through the forest, pushing Chivalte as hard as he could. He knew the King's castle was at least a day's ride from here, if not two. If Regina was engaged to the king, Robin hastened that it wouldn't be long before the Royal wedding happened and then it would be too late.

The sun was warm on his skin as he pulled through the woods, riding free and fast like this always seemed to calm him down and when the clock was ticking as it was now, a soothed heart was what he needed. The hours ticked by and he could feel his stallion beginning to slow from exhaustion, though he loathed to stop, he couldn't let his horse collapse. Pulling on the reigns they slowed nearly instantly to a gentle walk, his hands ran through the horses dark chocolate mane as he whispered his gratitude for the horse's strength and stamina. He truly was a magnificent beast.

They walked along the dirt road, as the sun reached it's peak in the sky, it's heat burning the back of Robin's neck. They needed to rest, find some shade and some more water. He pulled on the reigns, halting Chivalte as he slid off, his feet landing lightly on the dirt. If he judged the distance they had covered and by the sun's position, there should be a river a mile to the west of them by the next village.

It didn't take long before Robin pulled into the small rows of cottages, thankful to see the lazy river that ran in the distance. Making his way over, he dropped the reins, letting Chivalte drink on the river bed as he splashed his face with the ice cold water before filling his own canteen. He sat on the sandy beach for a moment, pulling an apple from his satchel. He smiled down at the red fruit, his memory lingering to her playful voice as she scoffed at his remark that apples were sour….she had thrown back in play that oranges were sickly sweet, life needed a bit of tart to it. They laughed together, agreeing to disagree on fruit choice, but in the end Robin had grabbed the red apple over the bowl of oranges on his kitchen counter.

"OIY‼!" A loud voice boomed around him, startling Robin into a standing position as he scrambled to his feet.

He was met with a large looking man, near around his age he guessed, but the guy was big…..already had a thick brown beard on his face, and unruly brown curls in his hair.

"Is that my mom's apple! You be stealing from us?!" The man charged forward and Robin threw his hands up in surrender

"No, I swear, I didn't steal it. It's mine"

The man stopped a few feet in front of him, eyeing up the piece of half eaten fruit….Robin's breathing was stalling, the guy was way to big to take on himself, he'd half to run and hope that he could mount Chivalte before this massive bloke caught a hold of him.

His feet were about to turn and make a break for it but he was frozen to the spot when the other man began laughing. He stared at him in bewilderment at the sudden change in attitude…. One minute it looked like he was going to punch Robin out, the next his bellows were echoing around the small beach.

"Relax mate, me mom's apples are more yellow, that ain't from her garden. I apologize"

Robin let out a grateful sigh "You sure know your fruit…."

The other man laughed and clasped Robin heavy on the shoulder "Well, I am a growing man, best if I know all that this fine world has to offer, don'tcha think!"

Robin couldn't help but let out a laugh of his own "I guess you're right"

"John Mirrows!" His beefy hand extended forward "But most people call me Little John"

Robin laughed harder at that as he clasped the man's hand "Robin of Locksley….. _Little_ John?"

John echoed his laugh "Aye, It's the running gag around this part of town. Where you off to?"

His heart suddenly clenched as he thought of Regina, he shifted his gaze to the stream, pushing the rapid beating of his heart down from his throat …. "The King's Castle"

Johns eye's widened "What brings you there?"

"Just some personal business" he answered back. It wouldn't be in the right to let a complete stranger know he was on his way to hopefully rescue the new Queen to be.

John furrowed his thick eyebrows, his chocolate eyes flickered across Robins face.

He could feel his heart rate picking up as John analyzed him in silence, obviously trying to figure out what Robin was hiding.

After a tense few moments, John shrugged "You should probably get going, the castle and town are getting hectic what with the Royal wedding tomorrow"

 _TOMORROW‼_ His mind cursed at him for delaying so long at this beach, he thought the wedding wouldn't be for at least a week, giving him time to plan. He threw the apple core to the ground before running to Chivalte.

"Oiy, Robin. If ya ever need a place, you know where you can stay" John hollered at him.

"Thanks, John. I appreciate that" He waved his hand back before pulling hard on the stallion's reins and taking off back onto the kings road, his heart panicking as he thundered down the pathway, it was still at least 50 miles till the castle…. Time was running out.

He'd hit the edges of the Kingdom by nightfall, his brow dripped in sweat through his exhaustion. He lead Chivalte to a stable quarter and paid the old man a few silvers for his keep. He sighed heavily as he left the stable, his eyes looking up at the enormous stone castle. He'd made it, but now what? He couldn't exactly go running through the castle calling for her, that would be absurd.

He walked around the town at the entrance of the castle, the preparations for the wedding were in full swing. Flowers were being treked in by the cart, tables of food and decorations followed behind. He was certain he had never seen so much food in one place in his life.

A band was in full swing to the right of him, villagers dancing enthusiastically around as they clinked goblets of ale and wine together. They all seemed to be in incredibly high spirits and Robin shuddered internally. If they only knew who their new Queen actually was, a girl of only 17.

"You look lost Lad" a gruff older woman nearly bumped into him as he continued to walk blindly around the cobblestone pathways.

He turned to the woman, she was older, grey hair in a tight bun, glasses rested low on her nose. He could see the bright blue of her eyes, sparkling in curiosity at him.

He stuttered to find his voice for a moment "I…uh…."

"You're not from around here are you?"

He smiled small and shook his head "No ma'am I am not"

"No need for ma'ams and all. What are you looking for?"

His eyes coasted up to the castle, the looming stone turrets jutting high into the black starry sky.

She watched him, saw his eyes flicker to the towers, he couldn't have been more than 20 she guessed, and by the look of his dirty clothing, he certainly wasn't of this town and his accent he was most certainly a foreign boy.

"Are you here for the wedding?"

"No" he was to quick to reply.

"Then what's with the for-longing look in your eyes?" Her eyebrow arched high as she crossed her arms over her chest.

"You wouldn't believe me if I told you" He laughed out.

"You are looking for someone"

It wasn't a question but a statement of fact.

Robin sighed and bowed his head, he didn't need to respond. He wasn't sure why he was being this honest with a stranger, but there was an odd sense of comfort in her eyes that he couldn't help but feel he could trust her.

"She's in the Castle I take it?"

He nodded as his eyes flickered back up to the castle.

"Where are you from boy?"

"Sherwood Townsville"

Her eyes widened at his response

"That's where the new Queen is from"

Again it wasn't a question but a simple statement.

A moment of silence surrounded the pair as she took him in, she knew that look, had seen in on her husband's face for many a year before he passed. She had seen it in her grand daughters green eyes when she looked at that woodman's boy.

She also knew more about this young Queen than most, being a cook in the kitchen. She had seen the girl walk into the Castle two days back. The older woman had watched her as she slowly walked through the Castle, and it hit her hard in her heart as she saw the sad defeated look in the young girl's eyes, the bare hint of smiles she tried to sell off. She was young, maybe a year older than her own Ruby, too young to be a Queen, especially to a man who was near three times her age.

The night of their arrival, she had served the new family, and had watched from the corner as the new Queen to be sat silent beside her mother. The other woman made her cringe, the way she loomed over her daughter, there was no doubt she controlled her. The young Queen's long chocolate hair cascaded around her face, as she hid her eyes when the talk around the expansive table shifted to the wedding preparations. The tears brimming her thick lashes as she listened to what was left of her freedom being taken away.

She watched in silence as the young girl excused herself from the table after the dessert course, lying that she was tired from the journey and needed rest. The King let her go without so much as a second glance, waving his hand in her dismissal. She followed the young girl up to her chambers in silence, a distance behind but there was a strange tug in her heart, she needed to ensure the girl was okay.

She stopped for a moment in front of the thick oak door of the Queen's new bed chambers, thinking of knocking but she knew that she probably wouldn't be let in. Instead she cracked the door open and her heart crashed as she saw the young girl sitting on the balcony, her knees curled into her chest, her shoulders trembling as she silently cried. She shuffled towards her, and the young woman didn't realize her presence until she placed a light hand on her shoulder.

She jolted up, a look of panic in her eyes as she stared at the older woman.

"Don't be afraid"

She watched as the girl brushed back the tears that stained her cheeks, trying her best to paint a smile on her face.

"I'm sorry" her voice shook as her lower lip trembled.

"No child, there is no need for that" She smiled at the girl.

"Who are you?"

"Milly Lucas, but you can call my Granny, most do"

It was a moment that passed as the girl stared up with her red rimmed chocolate eyes, debating whether she could trust this woman or not.

Granny settled down beside her and took her hand into her own grasp "I am not here to hurt you"

The young girl couldn't control herself any longer as she crumbled back into her legs, sobbing harshly.

Granny's heart ached for the girl, and she did what she knew best, pulling the girl into her arms, resting her head on her chest and began to rub smooth circles on her back. They fell into a quiet few minutes, as the girl clutched to her chest, her cries finally seeming to subside. She pulled back from Granny's arms, and shook her head in embarrassment "I'm sorry"

"I already told you there was no need for that"

"You must think I am being silly, crying over the fact I am about to be Queen" she let out a hitch laugh, her eyes coasting back out to the night.

"I think nothing of the sort" Their eyes met and Granny pushed a long strand of hair from her face, tucking it gently behind her ears "I know that royal marriages are tricky and often not for the right reasons"

The girls mouth dropped open at the words from the older woman. "You say that without fear of punishment?"

Granny chuckled "These people around here would starve without me, I have very little to be worried for"

The girl laughed lightly, swallowing the heavy lump in her chest as she played with the strings of her dress "I don't want to be Queen"

"So I gathered"

"Can you help me?"

Granny sighed heavily and pulled the girl's hands back into her own "Not in the way you wish, but I will do what I can to help you as Queen"

A fat tear fell from her eyes.

"What's your name?"

"Regina"

"Do you know the Queen to be?"

His eyes shot back to the older woman, his mouth parted as he inhaled a quick sharp breath.

"To a degree, you could say"

"Does she know you are coming?"

He shook his head miserably "No"

She took a moment to truly look at the boy, the sad hopefulness in his eyes as they fell back to the turrets.

"Why don't you help me with these baskets of vegetables. They are to go to the Castle Kitchens"

His eyes shot back to hers, and she smiled, a to knowing smile that had his heart skip a beat.

"I don't have all day" She huffed out as she handed two heavy baskets to him which he automatically grabbed. His feet moved without accord as he followed the older woman behind the Castle doors.

His jaw dropped at the expansive nature of the great hall, it could have fit three of his own small cottage back home. His eyes wandered to the heavy drapery, the thousands of golden candelabras that adorned the walls. He followed silently as his eyes searched for her. He didn't realize they had stopped until his chest hit the older womans back.

"EASY!"

"I'm sorry" he huffed out a quick apology.

"Set them down over there, and be careful. There are guards all over the place and they won't hesitate to take you directly to the king if they suspect anything"

He smiled and grasped her hand "Thank You"

With her simple nod he turned and made his way back to the Great Hall. He ran a hand through his blonde sandy hair. She wasn't here, and his first thought was her bed chambers…but that had to be heavily guarded. This was going to prove incredibly difficult. He fell into the shadows as he made his way up an enormous amount of steps, he only hoped he was going in the right direction.

His heart stopped as he saw the King and an older woman walking down the hallway towards him, deep in thick conversation. He pulled back into the shadows, hiding his body from their gaze. They passed without second glances in his direction, their conversation obviously stealing their attention fully. He breathed a sigh of relief as they walked down the steps, leaving the hallway in silence.

He pushed back from his hide away and walked with hurried steps towards the massive oak door at the end, surely this had to be for a Royal, he stole his breath before knocking gently, but there was no answer. For a moment he figured he had gotten the wrong door and his eyes searched the hallway for another. He smiled as he saw a small wooden entrance not twenty feet from him, a maid's door.

He turned the knob and walked through the dimly lit tunnel, finding another door at the end. Gently he pushed it open and his breath halted as his eyes took in the incredible room. There was a massive bed on the far corner, vanities and closets filled each wall and a heavy fire burned through the room, glowing it in warmth. He stepped in and shut the maids door behind him.

"Regina?" his voice whispered but there wasn't an answer, slowly he began to walk around the room, his fingers gliding gently along the diamonds and jewelry that adorned the vanity beside him. One necklace could feed an entire village he thought absently. He turned around and his heart stopped.

She was there, learning her body of the balcony, the light wind blowing her long locks around her small body. The gown she wore was incredibly, hugging her curves like a glove, a deep dark blue against her olive skin. His breath seemed to falter as he stepped closer to her…. "Regina?"

She stood straight up as she whirled around, her eyes wide in fear as she searched the room for who she thought was the King or her mother back to berate her more. Her own heart stopped beating for a moment as her eyes fell onto the stranger in her room. His blue eyes stealing into her as a small crooked smile ghosted his lips. Her mind betrayed her as all she saw was her Daniel, staring back…..her voice hitched as tears brimmed her eyes "Daniel?"

He was taken aback for a moment, but his feet pushed him forward to her. He could see the confusion in her eyes as they filled with tears...He reached out for her hand, holding her cold fingers into his warm palm "No, Regina. It's Robin"

Clarity flooded through her as she came back to reality, she pulled her hand from his as though burned by hot iron, her eyes creasing in confusion at him "Robin?"

He smiled and went back to reach for her but she recoiled a step and his heart clenched, maybe she didn't want to see him? Maybe this feeling was only on his part….his internal battle raged as he thought of how utterly ridiculous this all began to feel. Surely she didn't have the same feelings as he had.

His voice wavered as he ran his hand over his face, "I'm sorry, I just…."

"Why are you here?" she cut him off, her voice loaded in uncertainty.

Robin sighed and clenched his fists, his eyes fell to the floor, his embarrassment over taking him as he stood somewhat dumbfounded in front of her.

"Robin…" her voice came out as a whisper.

His eyes flickered up to hers and his heart thrummed in his chest heavy. She was incredibly beautiful, more so in person than in his mind. Her eyes were painted lightly, a rose shade covered her lips, her long chocolate hair pulled half up and half let fall around her slender shoulders.

She could see his own uncertainty as he looked at her….his eyes ghosting over her face as a small smile spread through his chiseled face. This was wrong, he shouldn't be here.

"Robin." She voiced out more stern and that seemed to pull him from his momentary daze.

"Regina, I'm sorry. I …I just…." The words seemed to falter him, the pull in his heart was overwhelming, the need to touch her hand and feel her warmth clouded his mind. But it was obvious in her stature that she wasn't feeling the same.

He turned on the spot, making way back to the door, his fingers nearly turning the knob before he heard her voice, shaking from behind him

"Wait!"

He stalled, his head turning back to hers to where she still stood frozen to the spot.

Her heart thrashed in her chest, she had just lost Daniel, the love of her life, and now there was Robin who was in front of her, a boy she had met only once, but the feeling of him had never left her. She knew she wasn't in love with the man, she wouldn't love anyone every again. But there was a strange pull in her stomach, a tingling in her heart as she stared back at the blue eyes that held her gaze.

She swallowed down the lump in her throat, "Why are you here?"

He turned fully to face her, his shoulders shrugged as his head bowed low, but his eyes never left hers.

She felt her body move towards him without her consent, but it was happening regardless, she stepped slowly closer and closer till she was only an arm's length away from him. They held each other's gaze for a long moment, either knowing what to say.

A long strand of curled hair fell around her face and as if on instinct he reached up and tucked it behind her ear. She flinched for a half second before letting the tension in her shoulder die down. His palm never left her as it now rested on her cheek, his calloused thumb pad gently smoothing over her cheek bone.

His heart was racing at the contact, that familiar warming sensation that flooded his body at the feeling of her skin. He smiled at her, "I just wanted to see you again"

The tingling on her cheek from his fingers sent butterflies into her stomach, but this wasn't right. She loved Daniel. This was just a reaction her current situation, she forced down the strange feeling, burying it deep.

"You can't be here"

"You're the one who shouldn't be here, Regina"

Her breath hitched at his words and she felt the emotional bubble threatening to explode, he was right, she shouldn't be here, she should be with Daniel. Her eyes closed heavy as a lone tear fell from her lashes. His thumb was quick to brush it away.

"Hey, Hey. I didn't mean to upset you M'lady" . He stepped a half stone closer to her, his other hand finding light purchase on her hip. He felt her hands placed lightly against his chest and the feeling set his heart on fire.

Her voice trembled as she forced herself to look back up at him. His eyes were so filled with concern and comfort she could have drown in them. Without knowing what she was doing, she leaned in and buried her head into his chest, clutching at the lapels of his shirt as she began to cry. His arms wrapped around her, pulling her tighter into him. His fingers played mindlessly with the ends of her hair, his cheek leaning into the crown of her head. The familiar smell of vanilla and apple floated through him as he took a deep breath. She was so beautiful, everything about her sent his heart into a race.

"Regina, let me take you away from here" He whispered into her ebony locks. He could feel her tense before she pulled back from him. Her eyes wide in question, her rose lips parted as the last remnants of tears ghosted along the seam.

She was supposed to have run with Daniel. Her heart tore apart at the thought of her stable boy, the green of his eyes warm and soft, the smell of hay and wood that clung to him, his gentle palms that held her.

Her mind ran a thousands miles a minute as Daniel's face faded from her vision and Robin's came into view. His eyes to held that same sense of ease, of adoration. He smelt like forest, the fresh smell of rain and pine. His hands ran up and down her back in soothing motion as he smiled gently at her.

"I Can't"

"Yes, Regina you can. We can leave right now" His voice thick in hope.

She shakes her head and extracts herself from his arms, the immediate coldness surrounds her as his warmth moves away.

"No Robin. If I ran, If we ran, the King and my mother would find us. It is treason against the crown, we would be executed"

He sighed heavily, missing the feeling of her in his arms instantly. He knew the risk that this would be…. "Regina…"

"Robin, stop. I have already lost so much, I would rather another innocent life not be taken on behalf of me. I can't go with you, I'm sorry"

He saw the sadness infiltrate her eyes at her apology as she turned back to the balcony, her shoulders slumping forwards as a slender hand wrapped around her waist. He watched as she stepped slowly to the open breeze, her body resting against the balcony door frame.

"You have to go, before they find out you snuck in here"

His heart clenched and he walked up behind her, wrapping his arms around her waist as he buried his head into the crook of her neck. He felt her breath stall for a minute, her body tense before relaxing into him. They stood together for a minute before once again she pulled from him and his heart ached.

"Regina, I know I can't give you the kind of life that a Queen would live in….and I know that we barely know one another…."

She snapped as she turned to him "We don't know each other at all"

Her sudden tone catches him off guard and he steps back from her . He can see her eyes brimming in tears, the clenching and unclenching of her fists at her sides. She is battling herself and it takes everything in him not to just sweep her up into a searing kiss.

"Do you not want to leave?" He asked quietly and she stops her pacing staring at him with a shocked expression.

"Of course I want to leave, you think I wanted to marry the King?" she turns her back to him and rests her forearms against the railings, silence surrounds them as Robin is unsure what to do. Her soft cries pull him from his tranced state and he walks up beside her, bumping her shoulder with his, and leaning against the iron balcony.

"I don't wish to be Queen. I don't want this life" she whispers between tears.

"Then come with me"

She shakes her head "I can't. And I can't let you die because you want to save me"

"I won't, if you haven't noticed I'm quite the artist at moving in the shadows, I made it to your room in the King's Castle without being noticed" He smiles and bumps her shoulder with his. She smiles, for the first time, and his heart skips a beat.

"I'll give you that, you have guts. Stealing into a Castle to kidnap the Queen. Quite the thief you are"

He chuckles and grabs her hand, the warm tingle spreads through his body and he wonders if she feels the same thing.

"Let me protect you Regina"

"You're very sweet Robin. And I appreciate the effort. But I can't" She squeezes his palm.

They stand together in calm silence, his thumb rubbing her knuckles. She leans into him and rests her head against his shoulder.

Their silence is interrupted by a loud bang at the door. They jump apart and she stares at the door, fear flooding her eyes as she looks up at Robin.

"You have to leave!"

"Regina, I won't let –"

"ROBIN! If they find you here they will kill you please!" she begs, pushing against his chest.

Another bang hits the door and she pulls his hand dragging him to the maid's door.

"I'm not going to leave you here Regina" He grabbed her wrist.

"Robin please‼" She began to tremble as the door knob opened, she swung the maids door open and pushed him inside. "I don't want to lose you to‼ Just go‼"

"I'm coming back" He pulled her into a tight hug before letting her go. She nodded frantically and closed the door on him just as the other swung open and her Mother parading in.

"REGINA! When I knock you answer!"

"I'm sorry mother" Her eyes flickered to the door beside her that hid Robin. Cora's eyes followed hers and she frowned moving closer to Regina.

"What are you doing?"

"Nothing" she replied to quickly and her mother gripped her forearm tight.

"You've been crying….again. Regina I've told you to cut that out. You are to become the Queen"

"I don't want to be Queen!"

"You have no choice, now what's going on…" Her eyes flashed back to the door as she moved Regina to the side.

Her heart panicked as she watched her mother reach for the knob. If she stopped her, Cora would surely know something was going on. She prayed that Robin had the sense to actually leave.

Her breath caught in her throat as the maid's door swung open. Cora stepped inside her eyes flickering around the dark hallway.

Regina let out her breath silently as she watched her mother retreat at shut the door.

He left, he was safe.

For now at least


	4. Chapter 4

The frosted air bit at her exposed skin, flakes of snow falling delicately from the black night sky. A fire in the corner of the chambers tried to fight off the cold, but it was no real use. It had set deep into her bones, chilling her heart, leaving behind only sadness.

It had been 6 months since her wedding, the memory still plagues her like a disease. To say it was over the top would be an understatement. There wasn't a spot in the castle that wasn't adorned with white roses, golden glittering trophies, a barrage of people in extravagant gowns, endless tables of food and wine, and music that boomed through the halls.

The ache in her knee feels ever present as she knelt before the King, his vows recited to love her, cherish her, and protect her. The heavy golden crown sat on her head like a vice grip, squashing down the last hopes of freedom. Her hands trembled in his grasp as she reciprocated his vows, promising to be loyal to him, obey him, and stand by his side. The brick in her stomach turned into a wave of nausea when the high priest announced them man and wife, bidding the King to kiss his new wife. The tears stung in her eyes, her cheeks cramping from the fake smile she desperately held on to. His lips were thin and dry with the lingering taste of cigars and red wine. The crowds erupted as she stood still as a statue, lip locked to a man three times her age. It took all the strength she had not to cry, crumble and break into pieces. Her fate had been sealed, a Queen of nothing, a trophy wife, a glorified nanny to the girl who cost her everything. Death would have been more welcome.

She tugs her robe around her, sitting in the white chaise, pulling a thick fur blanket over her knees as she sank back into the night. Every night was the same, she sat alone in her bedchambers, waiting to see whether the King would come and take what he claimed was rightfully his or if it would be the only friend she had in the entire realm, with his deep blue eyes, tousled blonde hair and dimpled smile.

To say she was grateful for Robin would be an understatement, he was her only saving grace at this point, a small flickering of light in the dark dungeon she was trapped in. He had become her confidant, at least on most things, telling him of the boring dinner she suffered through, the whining of Snow White amongst other things. But he noticed that she never spoke of the King, almost seeming to flinch if he was brought up. It would be forever burned into Robin's mind the memory of her shaking in fear on the massive bed the night of her wedding….

 ******FLASHBACK – THE WEDDING NIGHT – 6 MONTHS AGO******

He had heard the bells ring, proudly sounding the new Queen, proclaiming the marriage to all the kingdom. His heart clenched painfully in his chest at the bells. He hadn't been able to sneak in and see her all day, every effort he made was stopped dead by the barricade of Knights that roamed the gardens, castle corridors and stood guard at her room. He sat underneath the apple tree in the garden staring up at her window, wishing that she would just walk out once to see him. Maybe he could convince her to run….but she never came and the day fell into night.

The moon was hanging high in the sky as he deftly climbed the walls of the castle. With a light thump he landed on her balcony, hidden by the blackness of night. For a moment he stood still, hoping that if there were still guards inside they hadn't heard him. His breath was barely above a whisper as his feet moved in silence to the heavy door. Glancing through the window he saw nothing, just the flickering of candles through the glass pane.

Boisterous laughter caught his attention, echoing from the balcony below him. His eyes widened as he saw the King surrounded by a grouping of nobility men. All toasting and cheering the man on. Robin assumed it was congratulations on the marriage, and he turned his attention back to the room. She would be alone and he was grateful. He slide the wooden frame, a small creaking sounding his presence. Stepping inside his eyes initially found nothing, the chaise was empty, bath chambers dark, the royal bed sheets were messy but no one sat on them. He frowned, wondering if she was still downstairs. Turning lightly, readying himself to leave, a choked sob from the dark room sent a chill up his spine.

Whirling around his eyes frantically searched for her. "Regina?" His voice whispering into the dark room. The answer came in another hushed cry. His heart thudded in his chest as he made his way slowly towards her heavy breaths. A knife of pain shot through him as he rounded the side of her bed. She sat huddled against the far wall, knees tucked up under her chin, shaking arms wrapped obscenely tight in protection. Her long chocolate hair fell around her shoulders, shifting slightly with each tremble of her cries.

"Regina?" Robin stepped closer to her, unknowing whether she would be terrified or relieved to see him. Obviously something had happened and it broke him into pieces. Crouching in front of her he noticed the dark red stains on the white sheets that hugged her body. With a calming breath he reached out for her arm, gently gliding his fingers along her olive skin. She jolted back, recoiling as through burned by a hot iron, her eyes wide and fearful in their red rimmed state.

"Hey, hey it's okay. It's me. It's Robin" He stared into her eyes as they flickered around his face through their terrified haze. She seemed stuck, in shock, frozen from moving. Touching her wasn't going to help, at least he didn't think so. Instead he sat down on the cold stone floor, sideways to her body, his back resting against the bed and he extended out a palm to her. The tremors in her body hesitated for a half second as she stared at his open palm.

He could see the cut on her lower lip, slight bruising around her neck and collarbones, but what made his heart break was the evident blood stains around her lower abdomen. He wasn't a naive fool….but he had just hoped in some ridiculous notion that this wouldn't happen to her. He sat still, waiting for her to make the next move.

She swallowed down hard, the realization that it was him in front of her, not that vile monster slowly becoming more and more clear. It was his blue eyes that found hers, his crooked half smile set in the light brown scruff, his forest smell that finally broke her from her state of shock.

"Robin?" her voice tentative as she looked up at him.

"I'm here Regina".

Her fingers shook as they touched his, sliding up the length of the digits, before pressing into the palm of his hand. She clutched onto him in an instant, finding the one thing that made her feel safe.

Him.

 ****** BACK TO REGINA ******

She shuddered at the memory, swallowing down the bile that rose in her throat. She sat in his arms for the entire night, as he stroked her arms, back and played with her hair. When she woke up, he was gone save for a single arrow that rested beside her pillow, a promise he would come back. They never spoke of that night, the mention of the king would send her either into a hysterical sob or a violent rage and she internally thanked Robin for not forcing her to relive any of it.

Instead they sat together in stolen moments, usually in the dead of night where they couldn't be seen. It was still so dangerous for him to be here, but no matter how many times she begged him to go in fear of him losing his life just for her, he relented. Giving her a sideways smile and shrugging in defiance, simply stating that he wouldn't ever leave. And though the fear followed her around every day for months, she found herself being able to smile, half heartedly most of the time but it was there, and it was because of him.

"Regina?" She jumps at the mention of her name, but in an instant her heart settles as he walks into view. He walks over to her, grabs her hand and places a chaste kiss on her knuckles, his typical greeting. Settling down across from her on the balcony floor as she sits on the chaise, she can't help but feel a slight glow of warmth.

"How's today been your Royal Highness?" He chuckled in a mocking tone.

Regina rolled her eyes heavy, "Thrilling as every day".

"I hear the wondrous King and his angelic daughter are to take leave today for 2 weeks?" His eyebrows arch in question as he pops a grape into his mouth.

She hums in response, nodding her head slightly "Indeed, a trip the Queen need not accompany her loving husband on. Though I am devastated to miss these days with my step daughter"

Robin laughs, full and hearty at her sarcastic quip. He felt his heart skip a beat as the faintest hint of a smile parted on her face. She rarely smiled, the sadness was deep rooted in her now. It took everything he had to get one of those rare smiles. His heart bled for her, but she was trapped, unable to escape. He knew it was dangerous, and probably really stupid for him to keep sneaking into the Castle to see her, but he promised to never leave, and Robin was a man of his word.

They had come close a few times, a guard caught him walking towards her room, and he lied about being lost….a hand maiden had walked into Regina's room one afternoon and Robin threw himself under the bed in an instant…the worst though had been when Snow White had seen them together in the gardens one night. The confused expression on the young girl's face was heavy as she ran over to them, asking in a demanding tone who he was and why they were sitting together. He could feel Regina shaking beside him for a half second before she regained her senses, politely telling the brat that Robin was a new stable hand and they were discussing the potential of a new Mare as a birthday gift for the young girl.

It burned Robin deep as the princess smugly raised an eyebrow as she took him over once, her green eyes squinted in distaste. Snow had stalked off but not before requesting that the Mare be completely black, otherwise she didn't want it. He had wanted to ask Regina about her initial reaction, the way she trembled gave him the thought that there was something much more deep rooted going on.

"Well Your Majesty, can I offer to take you on a morning ride tomorrow?"

Their eyes met, and that strange but ever growing tug pulled at her. Whether they were to admit it or not, there was something beyond friendship between them. She chalked it up to the fact he was the only person who made her feel safe, but the look in his eyes resonated only adoration, a feeling she shared but couldn't give into. Instead she was polite to him but nothing more.

"You want to go riding?"

"If you would like to, I would be more than happy" He smiled, gentle as ever, letting her decide as always.

It would be nice to get out of the castle, breathe fresh air again, maybe for a moment forget what her life now entailed.

"I'd like that….but you can't be there at first. I'll have to meet you somewhere?" The edging of concern laced in her voice.

"How about I meet you at the lavender field? Simple to find, but far enough away"

"Okay…. I'll meet you there by half morning"

"I can't wait"

They sat for the rest of the afternoon together on the balcony, letting the sunset over the mountains, trading small stories of times past, and wishes of the future. She almost laughed when he proudly stated as a little boy he was certain he could grow up and become an eagle. His simple reasoning was he yearned to know what flying felt like. A sad pang pricked her heart, the ease of youthful desires now seemed like a desperate need. She wanted to fly, fly away, fly to freedom.

Robin seemed to sense the change in her demeanor, and he silently questioned the furrowing of her forehead and the longing look in her eyes as she stared out into the dying sunset. He hoped that maybe a day of riding would boost her spirits, each day that passed she seemed to be less and less of herself and it was slowly killing him.

"M'lady, I should leave before it gets too late" Robin clambered up to his feet. Her hand held out unconsciously for him to grab. Interlacing their fingers he gazed into her eyes as his lips touched her knuckles once more. A light smile flickered on her face.

"I'll see you tomorrow your Majesty"

"Goodnight Robin"

Regina watches as he leaves through the maid chamber door, the warmth in his eyes and slightly crooked smile the last thing she see's before the door closes. The low burning glow in her stomach flickers as her heart beats heavy. Turning back to the now orange, red and pink painted sky, a thick exhale leaves her. Tears brim in her eyelashes as she draws her knees up to her chest, hugging them in security. She misses Daniel so much, his face, his smile, the light peppering of kisses against her cheeks. It aches deep down, a vice grip strangling her from inside. The sun finally fades behind the last lingering mountain and a single tear falls.

This pain is immense, and she wonders if it will ever get easier to wake up every morning.

A slight flicker ghosts through her heart. Tomorrow could be better…..she was meeting Robin, seeings his calming eyes, feeling the safety he exuded silently to her, the steady beating of him as her only anchor in this world…..

She smiles, not fully, but it's more than she has been able to muster…. maybe tomorrow would be easier to wake up for.

 ****** PRESENT DAY – THE CURSE IS BROKEN AND THE RESIDENTS OF STORYBROOKE FALL BACK INTO THE ENCHANTED FOREST ******

The air is damp, heavy and thick as she breathes in, unwilling to let her eyes open, unwilling to face the new reality of her situation. She had lost her son, had to give up the thing she loved most in order to save him. Her heart burned in pain as his face flickered through her memory. His hazel eyes curious and filled in wonderment, his brown soft hair bouncing around as he stormed through the house, the bright wide toothy smiles as a toddler, the sleepy confessions that he loved her before sleep took him. It was all gone.

"Regina? You okay?" It's the irritating voice of David that breaks her stone silence. Her eyes flicker open to an extended hand that she brushes off, opting to let her legs, wobbly as they are act for themselves. David shrugs at her, and turns back to Snow who is walking towards the pair.

"We are back" Her voice is tense.

Regina says nothing, her eyes wandering around, taking in the heavy forest. There is a white cathedral in the distance and she smiles internally as the whereabouts of their landing becomes clear. They are maybe a two day ride from her castle.

It's though her thoughts are being yelled aloud as Snow asks "Any idea where we are?" .

David shakes his head and moves to ask some of the others. Regina again stays silent, wandering in a selfish pain filled moment if she could return to her castle alone, and live out the rest of her days in solitude, never having to see another person again.

Snow's eyes narrow as she watches the Queen's distant look take over. "Regina?"

The Queen pulls back from her broken daydream, "What Snow?" Trying to sound as monotone and bored as possible.

"You know where we are don't you?" The princess retorts with a high arching eyebrow.

Regina sighs, rolling her eyes as the dream of being alone fades "Of course I know where we are, this is my kingdom is it not?"

The question wasn't meant to be that heavy, and she instantly regrets her choice of words. The two women stare in awkward tension for a minute before Snow cracks a small sympathetic smile "You're right"

"Excuse me?" She is shocked at Snow's words.

Snow shrugs lightly "You were the Queen of this kingdom for nearly 20 years, It would only be natural you would know the layout better than most"

Regina stands silent for a minute, Snow neither acknowledged nor denied the claim she had made on the kingdom however indirect, instead she simply stated the truth. Regina did know this realm like no one else, 10 years of being married to the king and then 10 years of her own rule had solidified her knowledge.

"It's about 2 days west till we reach the Castle"

"Then I suggest we let everyone else know and start heading that way"

Regina nods slightly, watching as Snow turns on her heel and relays the message to the gathering of people in the field. They all seem okay with the idea, no one putting up that much of a scowl, except for maybe the Blue Fairy who seems rather put out and appalled at the idea. Regina snorts to herself, she would rather that damn fairy not join anyway.

It's without much planning that they are off, on foot, walking steadily through the woods, following the Charmings. Regina lingers off to the side, staying away from everyone, and they all seem to be okay with her standoffish nature. She hears the absent chatter behind her, the light laughter and reminiscing of memories from the Enchanted Forest lives of years ago.

They all seem happy to be here and it burns her. Once again no matter the situation these people are happy and she is slowly dying inside. No matter how much she had tried to change for Henry over the past two years, it was for nothing. She lost him in the end anyway. Her heart clenches as tears brim her eyelashes. A flash of heat curls through her as the pain begins to take over. Granny's eyes find hers and the old woman grimaces, obviously seeing the masked anguish of the Queen. Regina says nothing, tearing her gaze away from the wolf, she doesn't want her pity, regardless of their past history. She focuses on the path under her feet instead, counting the steps, hoping to cloud her mind instead of thinking of her son.

"WATCH OUT‼!" A hollering yell pulls Regina from her daze, the group scattering and cowering as they are attacked from the sky. She stands still, her eyes narrowing as she takes in the attackers. They are winged beasts, almost resembling monkeys, their wings long and leathery as they swoop down. Their screeching is like nails on a chalk board making her shudder and wince.

Snow cries out in panic a few yards ahead, her bow and arrow aiming to the sky and David cuts down the beasts with his sword. Others have their own weapons drawn, axes, bows, swords, even Granny has her crossbow aimed strong, pegging out a flying monkey here and there from the sky.

She stares down at her palm for a moment, a small flickering of fire dancing on her bare skin. It's broken just like she is, barely living.

Belle's scream draws her back to reality, just as a monkey is diving down at her. Without a thought or hesitation Regina pushes the library girl out of the way just as the beast hit her. It's talons are long and sharp, digging into her shoulder with a blinding burning pain. She feels the monkey begin to rise back into the sky, clutching her in its grasps. Death by monkey isn't exactly how she planned to go, and with a flare of anger, she sends a full fire ball into the monkey's chest. It whales and releases her.

She crashes down into a tree, her back slamming onto branches, tearing at her clothes, scratching her skin and bruising her limbs as she drops to the ground in a heavy thud. Her ears are ringing, vision spotting in black dots. The pain is incredible, mainly in her shoulder, the fire hot stinging searing through her. She vaguely hears the others running towards her as she sits up, groaning heavy at the stabbing pain in her lower back. She is dizzy, overwhelming so, the ground tilting and shifting beneath her.

A pair of leather brown boots file into her line of sight. Her vision is foggy but she moves up the body of the stranger, brown pants, white tunic, green cloak. She doesn't recognize him by his clothes. He bends down to her level, and her heart stops as a pair of warm ocean blue eyes fixate on hers. His own eyes widen in shock, jaw dropping as he stares back.

"Regina?" his accent sending the last confirmation through her. It's him.

"Robin?" her voice barely above a whisper as a wave of nausea and dizziness drag her body down. The arm she has propped herself up on shakes and give out sending her crashing back down to the ground as her world goes dark.

The last thing she hears is his voice calling for her and the long forgotten tingle that buzzes through her as his hands cup her cheeks


	5. Chapter 5

**WARNING FOR TRIGGER – MEMORY OF MISCARRIAGE IN FIRST FB**

There was a heavy ringing in her ears as consciousness began to pull through. She knew she was laying down somewhere, on something soft thankfully. She groaned through the pounding headache and vaguely could hear voices amongst the fog what was her mind. Her eyes clenched tightly shut but the piercing ocean blue invaded her. It was a tidal wave that crashed, her heart began to beat frantically. It was his eyes, his voice…that same long forgotten tingling sensation of his touch. Inhaling deep she tried to tamp down the panic that was beginning to rise.

What was she supposed to say to him? After everything that happened, all those years ago, how was she going to even look at him. Nausea plagued her as his face ran through her mind, the voices outside the tent now becoming more and more clear. She could hear him, in the distance talking with Snow though she couldn't quite make out their conversation.

What would he say to them? Would he reveal their past? What she did to him?

Anguish and guilt swam through her, if he only knew why she did it, maybe he would understand. Hearing the shuffling of boots, she turned onto her side, trying to pretend to be asleep, not wanting to deal with what was inevitably waiting for her. The flap of the tent open slowly and she knew it was him, he still smelled like the forest, thick pine and fresh rain. Internally she smiled sadly, reminiscing over days where it would have brought her comfort instead of sadness.

The mattress sagged behind her but she laid stone still. She didn't really know why he would be here right now, if she was sleeping, why is he just sitting there. She listened to him breathe, the long inhales and exhales, the warmth of his body pressing close to her back. Moments passed in silence as she waited for him to do something, to say something.

..

...

...

When he saw her it was like a dream, a strange painful dream. He was stunned to say the least when he and the Merry Men had walked into a group being attacked by the flying monkeys that had been plaguing villages for months. He heard a scream, saw the fireball erupt, the screech from the monkey, and the ragdoll way a body fell, slamming into the dirt. When he ran to her, never in a million years did the thought cross his mind that it was her. She was gone, long gone. His heart stopped beating he could have sworn when their eyes locked, her chocolate gaze sending shockwaves through his body. And then she passed out, fortunately he grabbed her before she could do anymore damage. He sat there holding her stunned as the Merry Men encircled him, eyes all wide in half fear half astonished.

His shock doubled when none other than Snow White came running up to him with a frantic look, falling beside him in the dirt. Seeing the once Bandit Princess who ran for her life from the Evil Queen, now calling out to her unconscious body with fear in her eyes left Robin bewildered. Prince Charming had come over at that point, concern etched on his face and without hesitation told everyone to set up camp. Robin held Regina in his arms, she was still so beautiful, regardless of their past the pace of his heart picked up as he cradled her to his chest. He carried her to a tent that had been set up and gently laid her down on the bed inside. Leaving her to sleep after he was certain she was okay at least for now, they would tend to her injuries later, he found Snow.

They spoke of the curse, and the land where they had been sent. Snow told him that they were back after Regina saved the town from Peter Pan, but lost her son in the process. His heart clenched at that part, he knew, well at least the Regina of younger days wanted to be a mother…..

 **FLASHBACK**

 _She was sitting there blank, staring at the fire with red rimmed eyes, unaware that he was approaching. He could see the pain etched across her face as he moved closer, taking caution to ensure she wasn't startled, he sat beside her. Without any words passing she leaned into him, her head laying against his shoulder as the first few quiet tears began to fall again._

 _His arm wrapped around her, pulling her body into his embrace. Her knees tucked under her chin as she sat between his thighs, her fingers tugging on the green tunic he wore. They didn't speak, she couldn't, the pain was to much, the breaking of her heart unbearable. How could you miss someone so terribly, someone you hadn't yet met. He rocked them gently back and forth, his palms rubbing against the bare skin of her arms, threading through the long trestle curls at her back._

 _He knew she was pregnant, and while the anger as to how still burned through him, the look in her eyes when she told him she was with child sent a flare through him. She was going to be a wonderful mother, and it gave him hope that maybe this baby would bring her some sense of happiness through the dark cage she was forced to live in. He had sat beside her for weeks on end when the king was gone, or asleep, rubbing a thumb on her still flat abdomen as she smiled. She hoped for a boy, but would love a girl just the same. Wondered what he or she would look like. It felt like a strange dream sitting with her, his mind would allow him to briefly believe that she wasn't the queen, and they were just sitting in their own bed on a farm somewhere far away with their baby growing inside her._

 _Though they hadn't said the three words that they both felt, Robin knew without a doubt that he loved Regina completely, and found solace in her eyes knowing she felt the same. But it was painful, knowing it could never and would never be. So here he sat, holding the woman he loved as she cried. He knew what must have happened, didn't bother to ask, all she needed was him and he would always be there_

 **PRESENT TIME**

He listened to Snow tell him how she had changed, begun a path to redemption. Knowing their more recent past he wasn't sure if he truly believed it. The last few years before the curse the Regina he once loved was gone, an Evil Queen living in her skin instead. Snow explained how the two of them were friends now, sharing family and learning to reconnect.

They finished their conversation, leaving Robin more confused than ever in his feelings. He should hate her for what she did, but the low burning in his heart tugged him otherwise. Frowning he made his way back to her tent. Pulling the flap back he saw she was laying on her side, unmoving and quiet. He sat on the bed next to her. It never failed to amaze him just how truly stunning she was. Long chocolate locks that curled and wound down past her shoulders, the smooth light olive complexion of her skin, thick black eyelashes that hid those incredible brown eyes, the ruby color of her lips that matched the pale pink tinge of her cheeks. He listened to her breath for a few minutes, wondering what he was going to say, if he should say anything at all….

Of course he had to say something, it was Regina….but what do you say to the person who you once loved so completely only to be betrayed by?

He shook his head, debating if he should just get up and leave. Though he thought she was asleep, he knew her breathing patterns off by heart, she was awake, waiting for him. His heart was pounding furiously in his chest as he turned to her, swallowing down the hard lump in his throat.

"I know you're awake" his voice barely above a whisper. He watched her heavy exhale, her eyes pressed shut tightly, her jaw clenching. She didn't answer and his heart smiled heavily at the memories of him laying beside her in bed. He knew she would only talk when she was ready so he did exactly what he used to do. He laid down on the small cot beside her on his back and waited.

She stilled at his movement, feeling him laying down beside her. It was painful torture, the memories that flooded through her. He had always done this, on those nights where something had happened, or she was missing daniel or whatever. He would simply lay beside her and give her all the time she needed and eventually she always would roll over to him, hug his chest and let it all spill. She couldn't do it now though. A couple of tense minutes ticked by, Robin waiting and Regina stalling. Knowing they would have to talk sooner or later, Regina finally rolled onto her back, her shoulder brushing against his for a brief moment before she shuffled away. Her eyes were still shut tight, but she could feel him looking at her. Her heart beat pounded in her chest, she wondered for a moment if he could hear it. With a tense sigh she opened her eyes and turned to him.

It was like being sucked back in time. His blue eyes staring straight at her, but there wasn't the love and adoration in them anymore, only confusion, pain and the smallest hints of anger.

"Hi" she finally managed to breath out.

"Hi" he echoed her words.

They laid there side by side, yet miles apart from who they once were.

"Are you feeling alright?" he asked gently.

Her body was aching now that she thought about it. Her back brutally sore, the bruising on her arms and legs making their painful appearance. She could feel the headache pounding again, the cuts stinging below her dress.

"I'm fine" her tone steady, unwilling to show pain.

A sideways grin parted in his face, the wrinkles creasing into his eyes and it made her wonder about him, how he was doing, where his family was, if he was happy, would he forgive her.

"You've always been a terrible liar" He smirked to which she lightly huffed out a small chuckle, her eyes finally breaking from his. He knew her still and it killed her deep down.

Silence surrounded them again, the elephant in the room beginning to suffocate them. She could feel the claustrophobic setting in, the tent all of a sudden feeling ten times to small, the oxygen being sucked out of it. Her lungs began to pant and her heart rate quickened, a light sheen of sweat breaking out on her forehead. She needed to get out, get away from him.

"Regina…." His voice set her off and without thinking she lurched up, forcing the scream of pain down as she ran out of the tent, leaving a bewildered Robin behind. The forest was cool as she ran, her bare feet hitting the dirt without care. Blindly she raced through the trees until the pain in her body took over and forced her to slow down.

It felt like the world was closing in on her, the inability to breath made her dizzy and the waves of nausea forced her to collapse, what little she had in her stomach onto the forest floor. It was a cold sweat that drenched her as she trembled, icy on her skin though she felt on like she was on fire from the inside. Collecting herself she walked through the tree's towards the sound of water, thankful it wasn't far away.

The river gently gliding along, the moonlight a dancing reflection on it's surface. She sat on the bank, leaning against a large boulder as the cool wind whipped around her. She couldn't do it, couldn't face him, even though what happened was necessary, it still destroyed them, or what was left of them. He probably wouldn't even believe her anyway, if she told him the truth.

She pulled three long strands of grass from the ground and subconsciously began to braid them through her fingers as the dark silent night engulfed her. Being encased in her own thoughts she didn't hear him behind her.

"I see you remember how" his voice making her jump. She didn't reply, only focused on the green braid that was halfway formed. He sat down beside her, pulling three blades of his own.

He wondered if she would run again, but the exhaustion on her face suggested otherwise. She simply sat in silence, her eyes battling between fear and uncertainty. He saw the damp sweat on her back, the tremble of her fingers. Her teeth came out to bite down on the shaking bottom lip as she avoided his eyes.

Robin knew they had to talk, it had to happen, so with a heavy heavy sigh he pulled the green braid from her hands, slightly astonished at her lack of defiance as her fingers went slack. Placing their matching braids side by side his eyes dropped to the river as hers looked up at the stars.

"Why did you do it Regina?"

He missed the stray tear that fell before she wiped it away, but the tremble in her voice sent a knife through his heart.

 **FLASHBACK: YEAR 5 of REGINA being the QUEEN**

"You're going to get caught" She huffed out at him, to which he simply shrugged and sent her that infuriating grin of his with a smug reply "I haven't been caught yet and it's been over 5 years of me sneaking it to see the Queen"

Regina shook her head, this was getting out of hand. She loved him but the fear of him being found out was beginning to take it's toll. She was jumpy all the time, flinching and fearful of every door that slammed open, each window that cracked, every time a voice would interrupt her. The nights he didn't show up were the worst, it would send her into panic, fearing that he had been caught.

"Robin, be serious. This is dangerous!" She stalked away from him, running her hands through her hair in exasperation. He hated to see her like this, worried for him, and he knew that it was dangerous but he really didn't care. He loved her with all his heart and would be damned if he was going to run away from her. Hanging his head he walked slowly over to her, an apologetic look etched across his handsome features. He wrapped her in a hug from behind, his nose burying into her hair. They were seldom affectionate like this. They never kissed, she was to afraid of letting her feelings get too heavy, after all she was married to the King. For 5 years they skirted around true feelings, letting only the holding of each other's hands, light caressing in comfort and warm hugging be the extent of their affection. He longed for more and knew deep down she did to. But he understood her reservation, loathe as he was to obey them, he would never push her, he would take only what she gave.

She sagged into his hug, interlacing their fingers for a moment, letting his forest smell surround her in a safe embrace. "Robin, please" she whispered as she turned into his chest, nuzzling into the crook of his shoulder.

"You know how possessive Leopold is. If anyone see's you and it gets back to him you will be executed. I can't have that happen"

He hugged her tight, his fingers carding through the long dark hair he so loved. She was right though, if they were found out, he would be hung and he feared she to would be punished by death for treason against the crown. It had happened nearly too many times. Too many prying eyes in the Castle, making it harder and harder for him to sneak in. Guards had begun to notice him, maids and cooks watching him with confused looks. But for all the danger it posed, he still couldn't bring himself to leave her.

"Regina, nothing is going to happen"

"You don't know that" she retorted back sharply as she pulled out from his arms. Her anger was beginning to rise, it wasn't so much at him, but more at the situation that they were in. She wanted him to see reason, but he was stubborn in loving her and though she may love how hard he did love her, the idea that he could be killed for it was to much a risk.

"You are being ridiculous Robin"

"How so?" his tone blunt as his arms crossed in front of his chest in defense.

Her eyes rolled and her own stony attitude came forward. "How can you tell me you care for me, if you are willing to take the chance we may be caught and you could die? Where would that leave me?"

Her words caught him off guard, and he was about to try and calm her nerves but she cut him off sharply "You think I want you to die? You think I want to watch you die at the hands of the King? I would be executed right behind you or worse forced to live in this god forsaken prison completely alone with that man. You think that is what I want?"

"Regina please-" he tried to cut off the tirade

"No Robin. You need to listen to me. I don't want you to get hurt. I wouldn't survive it if you did" The shake in the last few words hit his heart.

"So you would rather live without me, than with me?" His tone cutting sharper than he intended and the pained look on her face burned him. Her jaw dropped open, eyes flooding with hurt at his words.

"You call this living? Sneaking around all the time. I am always scared Robin. I literally walk through every minute of every day in fear for you. I can't do it anymore" Her eyes dropped from his as they filled with tears.

His heart broke, wetness coating his eyes as the emotional turmoil began to bubble inside. He walked slowly towards her trembling frame, wrapping his arms tightly around her once more. He wasn't going to let her go.

"I'm not leaving you Regina. Not Now and Not Ever." He breathed into her, hugging her impossibly tighter to him, praying she would give in. He could feel her hesitation in the way she held onto him.

Regina pulled away, her eyes finding his, matching in building tears. She didn't want to live without him, but his life was more important than her happiness. If living alone would ensure he would survive she would do it. The fear of having to watch another love die in front of her was to much, it would destroy her completely.

"I'm Sorry" the tears ran from her eyes, staining her cheeks as she tried to pull out of his arms.

"No Regina, Please. Don't say that" He tugged her back, burying his hand into her hair the other wrapping around her slim waist. His own tears falling as he began to beg, pleading to let him stay, promising he wouldn't leave, whispering that he couldn't live without her.

She shook in his arms, silently crying and saying good bye. It was for his own good, being with her would only bring tragedy in the end. She loved him to much for that to happen.

"You need to go" she whispered through her tears.

"I'm not leaving you" he responded in kind.

She sighed, there was only one way she could think of that would save him, and though her heart broke at the thought, she knew it had to be done whether he liked it or not.

"You can come back tomorrow I promise, but I need you to leave right now"

Robin kissed the crown of her head whispering a thank you into her thick hair. She pulled back and this time he let her go with a watery smile, one to which she barely mustered to return.

"I'll see you tomorrow Regina" he brought her knuckles up to his lips and gently kissed each one.

"Goodbye Robin" She didn't let sound come out, only mouthed the words in silence as his eyes were on her hands. Her heart was slowly cracking at the seams, bleeding and dying as she watched him leave. She smiled as he walked out, hoping it was enough for him to believe, but as the door shut the tears came back with avengence. She sank to the floor and cried, cried for the love she was about to lose, cried for the love she already lost and cried for the lifetime of loneliness she was about to surrender to.

 **The Next Day**

He walked through the small village, nearing the castle gates. The sad smile on her face still burned in his memory. She looked as though her world was falling apart, eyes so sad he nearly ran back to her. He could make this better, he would convince her to run for good this time, they could sell a story that she died or something, anything that would get her out of the castle forever. With a new sense of determination, he strolled through the castle gates. Unaware to the guards that were watching.

He ran into Granny, whose face was sullen and grey as she looked upon him.

"What's wrong?" He hastened to question, the expression of anguish in her blue eyes sending his heart into a panic. He immediately wondered if Regina was okay, what happened to her, he would have heard of something if the Queen was injured or ill would he have not?

"You need to leave right now" Granny's voice thick in sadness but stern in resolution.

He stared back at her astonished "What? Why?"

She lifted a folded piece of paper to him and his heart plummeted when he opened it.

 _WANTED_

 _ROBIN HOOD_

 _CRIMES AGAINST THE CROWN_

 _FOR_

 _THIEVING AND BANDITRY_

His face painted between the false words. The oxygen left his body as he stared at the parchment. His mouth running dry, heart slamming into his ribcage with each beat.

"They know who you are, you need to run now and don't come back" Granny's solemn tone pulled him back from his shock.

It all came crashing down at once, the guards from the side began to run towards him, yelling and shouting for someone to grab him. He clutched the parchment of lies, turned on his heel and ran as fast as he could. Through the crowds of people and the screaming of the guards he ran. Reaching Chivalte he threw his body on top and took off at breakneck speed, the knights still pursuing him.

He didn't know how long they ran for, but the last thing his eyes saw was the tall turret of the north west castle, a balcony holding a fading image of the women he loved. She turned against him, spread false lies about his identity just to get him to leave. His heart burned in half agony and fury at her. How dare she condemn him to this.

He would be on the run forever now a life as a criminal

 **PRESENT:**

She didn't respond, just stared up at the stars at the tears brimmed against her eyes.

He couldn't look at her, there was so much anger that resided in him from her betrayal, he was afraid that once it began to come up again he wouldn't be able to hold himself back. She ruined his entire life. Forced him to become an outlaw, live life on the run, unable to return to his family ever again, and cut off all hopes of them being together.

He nearly died a few times, from starvation, trying to live in the woods, through the frozen winters. He ended up having to steal food and clothing from villagers and it made him more resentful towards her with each item he took. It was months later when he stumbled upon an old face, the burly brown haired bearded friend he made all those years ago.

Little John brought him into his own life, into a band of men that lived together in the woods, surviving prosperously together. Robin fell into their lifestyle immediately, but never once when asked why he was on the run did he speak her name. She was gone, and he wouldn't let his heart break any more for her, it was shattered as it was.

The silence ticked by, as he waited for her to answer. The anger inside building slowly at her apparent boredness towards him. She was avoiding him. He was about to gruff out an annoyed statement to her lack of decency towards him but her sad breathless whisper made his heart sink, two little words that crushed him completely.

"I'm Sorry"


	6. Chapter 6

"I'm Sorry" the tears welled in her eyes as she stared into the black night sky. She could feel her heart pumping in her throat, choking any hope for breath. The distance between the palpable, thick heated tension that seemed to suffocate her. It's like yesterday, watching him walk out of her bed chambers, his soft smile so reassuring and yet so naive. As that heavy oak door shut, so did every hope in her heart, leaving with him, leaving her alone in the darkness of a caged life.

He watched her, the wetness in her thick lashes, tremble of her lower lip that her teeth could barely contain. Her hair had fallen out, leaving messy curls falling around her face. She looked even more beautiful if it was possible sitting here bathed in the moonlight, her skin like milky cream, lips pale red, her dark chocolate eyes lifted to the sky. He nearly wanted to kiss her, If he didn't have this resonating anger.

She ruined everything, made him an outlaw, forced him to become a thief. It jeopardized his entire life and left him with a gaping unfillable hole in his heart. He loved Marian, she was kind, sweet and so loving. She made him into the man he was today, but there was always that lingering emptiness, a hole he couldn't patch together.

Exhaling hard, he steady his emotions "Just tell me why you did it". He swallowed hard and turned to face her fully, his heart clenching as a single tear fell from her eyes, staining the perfect complexion of her face.

 _Why did I do it….why do you think I did it….I had to save you….but you won't believe me….no one ever believes the Evil Queen._

Her mind battled, she knew he was looking at her, but the fear of finding his eyes held her back. For years since that fateful day, she wondered if he was alright, if after their run ins in the coming years was he still alive, had he escaped, was he happy, even without her.

"Regina, look at me please" he whispered out.

Her breath hitched, a tremor ran through her lungs as her eyes squeezed tight together. It was now or never…she had almost wished it would be never. But there was no escaping this conversation. They were back in the Enchanted Forest, for good. It would be only to ridiculous to think she would never see him again.

"I can't" she faltered.

"Why? Why can't you just do me this one service. After everything you put me through, you owe me at least this" The anger behind his soft tone spiking.

She hesitated, chewing down on her lip, her fingers scratching the velvet gown she so detested.

"Because Robin"

"That's not an answer Regina"

His curt retort made her flinch. She knew she deserved it, the Evil Queen deserved every ounce of anger thrown at her, but it still didn't help the thrumming of her heart. Wondering if he could forgive her, would forgive her.

"Why can't you just let it go?" She huffed back.

He was shocked at her response, his jaw dropping open, eyes wide in astonishment. She wasn't even truly sorry, wouldn't give him the time of day for an explanation. After all these years, she truly wasn't the same girl he knew.

"You broke my heart" he ghosted out, his eyes watching her every emotion that flickered across her face, the pain, the anger, the sadness. She had to feel some remorse, didn't she?

His words cut through her like a hot knife, sending a wave of anguish through her veins. But the Queen didn't know how to say it, how to tell the man she loved secretly for so many years, her personal hidden savior, that letting him go was one of the hardest things she had ever had to do. Love is weakness, it makes one vulnerable, and she had never felt more vulnerable than in this moment. So Regina threw up her mask, hiding every ounce of torture behind it as she turned.

"I saved you. You think you would be grateful" she sharply retorted, still avoiding his gaze, but her eyes decidedly finding his hands that fiddled in the grass.

"Grateful? For what exactly? Ruining my life? Tearing my heart into pieces, nearly getting me killed on multiple occasions. Yes Regina, Thank You" He huffed back in annoyance.

"What did you want me to do Robin? Have you sneak into the castle every night, putting both our lives in jeopardy? We would have been found out, and you damn well know we both would have been executed"

His hand rubbed over his face, whether she was right or not didn't abate the fact that she betrayed him.

"I would have given my life for you, you know that"

Her mask faltered for a half second, but she couldn't let it slide.

"And what makes you think I would have done the same for you?"

The words were cold, hitting hard in his heart, she knew it before she had a chance to retract them.

 _Good One Regina, just bloody splendid_ … Her mind goaded her.

She listened to the heavy breathing, watched his one hand curl into the grass in defeat.

"You did once"

Her eyes moved to catch his involuntarily in shock. The crystal blue of them stopping her heart for a moment.

"What?"

He half smiled through his annoyance at her "I know it was you, you risked a lot that day"

"I don't know what your talking about"

 _Liar! You know damn well what he is referring to!_

"The Black Guard just doesn't stop whipping a fugitive for no reason, Regina. We both know they took only orders from the Queen….from you"

*** FLASHBACK ***

She sat in her chaise, heart conflicted over the fact she couldn't find Snow White. Maybe it was for the best, maybe she should just let the brat live out her days as a bandit. But she couldn't. Snow stole everything from her. Daniel, her freedom, her life, it was all because of that stupid girl that couldn't keep a bloody secret. Stewing in her chambers, her mind was jolted back as a guard banged into her room.

"Your Majesty!"

Rolling her eyes, she glared at the knight "What?"

"We have news that Nottingham has captured the thief Robin Hood"

Her heart dropped at the sound of his name. He was alive, but if Nottingham had him, it wouldn't be for long. She desperately tried to conceal her strike of fear as she stood in all her regality.

"Where is he?" She sneered, hoping the dumb guard hadn't noticed her panic.

"Just outside Hillcrest Village, My Queen. He is being whipped in front of the entire town as we speak"

Her mouth ran dry as her heart beat frantically against her rib cage.

"You will send word to Nottingham that he is to let the prisoner go"

The guard's eyes widened in shock, "Your-Your Majesty….he is a wanted thief!"

Hotly she spun on the spot, stalking with determination over to the idiot. Her hand flickered up and the guards oxygen was cut off.

"You dare defy your Queen. I have you a summon and you will do well to obey by it!" She growled out.

He clawed at the invisible grip, his face turning a dark shade of red as he desperately nodded.

Her fist clenched as he dropped to the ground, heaving and choking "What should I tell the Sheriff?"

"Tell him I will deal with Robin Hood"

The guard nodded and ran as fast as his feet could take him.

She whirled around, nearly running herself towards the mirror that hung on the opposite side of the dark room.

"MIRROR! MIRROR WHERE ARE YOU!?" Her voice at a near scream

The face came into view, bored and loathing in expression "Yes. My Queen?"

"Show me where they are holding the thief Robin Hood"

The mirror arched a suspicious eyebrow at the Regent "May I ask as to why you have taken a sudden interest in the bandit?"

Growling in frustration she slammed her fists on the oak vanity "I am the Queen, you will tell me where they are or so help me I will shatter you into a million pieces!"

With a huff the face disappeared.

The villagers were surrounding the wooden stage, a tall wooden spike in the middle. Her heart crashed as she saw a man strapped to it, hands bound in front of him, face hooded. His tunic was shredded, the dark red blood soaking into the torn pieces. She felt dizzy, the inability to breath becoming overwhelming.

"Why aren't they stopping?" She watched in panic as the Sheriff cracked the whip, lacing another wound onto the prisoner's back. The man arched, screamed in pain as his legs failed him, forcing him to sink to the ground, kneeling for mercy.

Her hands trembled as she watched the nightmare, he was going to die, everything she lost was going to be for nothing if they didn't stop that fucking sherriff this instant.

The whip raised once more, and the tears fell from her eyes as it made contact once again. She could see the man give into unconsciousness, his frame slumped forward as the revolting Nottingham laughed in his face. He flicked the whip once more, and she felt as though she was about to pass out, until a black guard ran up the steps, blocking the weapon from making another hit.

"Oh thank god" she breathed. The sheriff looked repulsed and shocked as the guard spoke into his ear, a snarl leaving his lips as he dropped the whip and stalked off stage. Attendants ran to the broken man, unbinding his wrists, lifting his lifeless body away from the crowd and into a small tavern.

She needed to see him, make sure he was okay. But the Evil Queen waltzing into some town without notice was preposterous. Stepping back from the vanity, her body was cloaked in the purple smoke, leaving behind an unknown unrecognizable woman behind. Without a second though she transported herself to the village, landing in the dark alley behind the whipping post. Her stomach rolled as she walked by it, the blood staining the birch wood.

Night was falling around her as she made way to the tavern, hoping that wondering eyes didn't notice her presence. The thick door cracked open and the voices inside died in their hushed frantic tones. The crowd turned to her, and for a moment she wondered if the glamour spell didn't work. But as quickly as the acknowledged her, they returned to their tables, low conversations echoing once more.

She treaded through the tables, hearing lingering words of "Apparently it was notice from the Queen"…."Why would she stop it"…."He may not make it"…."25 lashes"…."God I hope he's alright".

Their words sent knives into her heart, 25 lashes…that was surely enough to kill someone. She skitted up the stairs as quietly as possible, watching from the distant corner as a two men gently closed the farthest door. Their eyes were heavy, watered and desperate as they moved towards her.

"I don't know if he is going to survive John" the older man whispered out, the staining on his cheeks evident.

"He's Robin Hood. He has to make it!" The burly companion whispered out in anguish.

They didn't even notice her as they passed by, too deep in their worry for the tortured man behind the door. She waited till their footsteps died before carefully walking forward.

Her palm pressed heavy on the door, her lip trembling in fear as to what lay beyond it. It creaked open, leaving a small beam of light into the single candle lit room. She heard his groan before she saw him and her heart broke. He lay on the bed, wounds to the sky, his face buried sideways into a pillow.

Her heart burned as she drew closer. The marks on his back were covered in bandages and snow packs, but she could see the red staining of blood that coated the edges, dripping down in river lines on the side of his torso, pooling into the linen below.

His face squeezed and clenched as he rolled through the waves of pain, the anguished moans leaving his dry lips. Her fingers found his hairline, brushing through them with a ghost touch. God she missed him, her heart was pounding erratically as she took in his handsome features in what felt like a lifetime. His hair was shorter, jaw covered in the light sandy stubble. His body was strong, muscular and thick as her hands grazed upon the soft skin of his neck. She let her glamour spell fall, pretending in her mind that it was just to two of them again, just Regina and Robin,

It had been years since she had seen him, but the glow in her heart felt the exact same. Debating for a moment, she held back the urge to call to him, instead focusing her attention on the wounds below her palms. Gingerly she unwrapped them, and nausea hit her hard as the torn, shredded skin came into view. She could feel the tears filling, clouding her vision with each bandage removed.

He grimaced and let out a harsh exhale as she peeled away the layers, the tears freely falling without her control.

"I'm gonna save you Robin, hold on" her voice not but a trembling whisper against his skin. Pulling herself back up she let her magic thrive to life, the purple smoke oddly dancing with bands of white, something she had never seen before. It made her hesitant, but the painful whimper brought her back. Her hands moved gently, clearing away the blood, stitching back the torn muscles, sewing together the gashed skin. Sweat pooled on her brow, healing magic wasn't exactly her strongest suit, it was incredibly fatiguing but it didn't matter in this moment. He mattered.

She watched as the smaller cuts melted away, but cursed herself as the thicker deeper wounds left hot pink scars behind.

 _Always a disappointment Regina_. Her mother's voice roaring into her mind. Fighting them back she focused on him, on the smoothness that was his breathing now, the easy lines of his face finally replacing the harsh pained ones. Her hands shook as the last scars were healed, her own breathing thick and heavy in exhaustion. Wiping her brow her eyes found his face, thankfully still asleep and now void of majority of his anguish.

She knew she had to get back, probably shouldn't even be here in the first place. Standing and smoothing out her dress, she laced her fingers with his, pressing a soft kiss to the back of his palm, her heart breaking over the fact she had to leave him. What if she just stayed…but she couldn't. He probably hates her anyway, it's best that it stay like that, at least he will be somewhat safe without her.

A tear fell from her eyes, hitting the smooth skin of his hand as she clutched it to her cheek, he was so warm, so soft, so comforting. Leaning over his body, she couldn't help it when her lips pressed gently into his temple, he stilled smelled like forest, her sweet forest. He let out a whimper at the contact and she knew he was rousing. Standing slowly, their fingers fell apart and with a cloud of purple smoke she was gone, not ever noticing the tired blue eyes that watched her leave.

******PRESENT TIME*******

"What does it matter Robin?" She sighed out, the morning sun beginning to crack through the dark black sky.

"It matters because I don't quite understand it…you stopped Nottingham from killing me, and then you healed me"

Her eyes widened in shock at his statement, she didn't know he knew that it was her that night, how would he know, he was out cold when she left…wasn't he?

He shuffled to face her, his face lined with uncertainty, but his eyes were full of something strange, something that made Regina's heart double over. Robin looked at her for a long time, it was an odd sensation that was running through his body. He was sitting here next to her, after all those years, and all the run ins they had, they were just here, sitting side by side like all those years ago.

She was becoming uncomfortable under his gaze, her skin tingling with every breath he drew in. The sun cracked the horizon, lightly the sky up with pinks and oranges, thankfully a stunning distraction from his glued eyes. They both turned, silently to watch the sun bring a new day, a day that would still hold so many questions.

"I need to know Regina, please"

"Know what? I've already told you I did it to spare you from being executed" The tired annoyance in her voice faltering as she leaned her chin onto her knees, hugging her body in tight.

"It's like you wanted to make sure I would never be happy without you" He growled out.

The lump in her throat dropped heavy, how dare he think that. Everything she did was for him that day, and every time after. She was the Evil Queen and time and time again she spared him, giving majority of her Guard confusion over her actions. It made no sense that the Queen who had no problem destroying anyone was constantly letting the most wanted bandit escape.

Standing up in the grass, she wiped the tears that concentrated on her thick lashes, It would be ridiculous to let herself cry right now. Emotions were vulnerability and she couldn't be vulnerable, not anymore. Righting herself, she felt him stand beside her with a gruff.

"Running away again?" He barked

Her heart was bursting at the seams, maybe she didn't need to have the bloody thing inside her, that would make this all so much easier. She needed to push him away, as much as half of her screamed not to, it was the right thing to do.

"Just leave me alone Robin" she replied curtly as she turned to walk away.

He wasn't giving up that easy though, his mind was torn, the women of his past was so different from the one who was standing in front of him right now. Something was different and yet so much the same.

"Regina wait" he stumbled , needing something he didn't know if she could grant.

"What!?" She spun around aggravated, her eyes filled with tears through the mask of anger she falsely wore.

He stood there dumbfounded, at a loss for words. There may have only been a few feet in between them but it felt like an ocean.

"I can't give you what you want Robin. If my explanation isn't good enough for you than I'm sorry you feel that way" She replied stone walling once more.

He huffed out "I just don't understand, why force me away? Why break my heart? Why save me at the whipping post? Why spare Marian? I deserve answers dammit"

"I already told you, Why!" She agonized back, her anger building.

Robin hung his head

"Why break my heart and then save me, force me to think of you. Every time, just when I thought maybe I could move on, you come back into my life, for a fleeting moment you were there, like a whisper I couldn't hold onto. It was torture Regina"

The thumping of her heart had to be loud enough for him to hear as she sat there like a stone, letting his words run over her like a tidal wave.

"If you think you are the only one who was left with a broken heart, you are seriously daft"

She was gone before he could reach her hand, the plume of purple smoke dissipating leaving him stunned at her words.

She was heart broken?

3 Days later

They hadn't spoken, he barely saw her since the other morning. She was keeping her distance and he wasn't sure whether he was thankful she was the one putting up the wall or not. Hearing that she was heartbroken after forcing him to leave was confusing. He knew that deep down it made sense, but he still couldn't let go of that residual lingering resentment to her.

From the back of the group he walked slow, listening to the tales of Belle and Baelfire since he'd last seen them, but his eyes couldn't part with her frame. The forest was quiet, the group decided it was best they all head for the castle before deciding what to do about the flying monkeys that were invading the lands.

It was with the screeching of another attack his eyes lost contact with her. The flurry of bodies scattering and weapons being drawn broke open. His bow was strung, firing arrow after arrow as a mass of monkeys viciously attacked, claws tearing anyone they could get ahold of.

It seemed never ending, and he was beginning to panic as John was attacked beside him once more, blood pooling from his shoulder as he screamed in pain. All around him, people were injured, fighting still but the wounds were there. Bodies of monkeys slumped to the ground, as they began to finally take over the siege. His heart turned to ice as he heard his son scream for him, a blood curdling cry. Turning he saw Will and Tuck laying on the ground, bleeding profusely, and his scared 5 year old boy just behind them.

It was like slow motion, watching the beast swoop down towards the little boy, he ran as fast as his feet could take him, but the monkey was going to beat him. He screamed for his son, but the boy was frozen to the spot. He saw the flash of her black cloak from the corner of his eye, a fireball roaring into the sky, setting any left over simian on fire. He watched stunned as she stood in front of his son, the magic from her palms booming out in torrents and tidal waves.

Monkeys screeched in pain as their bodies turned into ash. For a half moment, he worried for his son behind the inferno of magic, but as he closed the distance, a small blue bubble came into view behind the Queen. Roland was tucked inside, his eyes wide is awe. Robin tried to pull him from it, but was flung back with an electric shock.

It seemed to break Regina's concentration as the last few monkeys fell to the dirt. With a flick of her palm, the protection bubble was gone and she knelt down into the ground , hoping she hadn't completely terrified the boy. He stared at her with his big brown button eyes for a moment and she found his eyes, smiling gently hoping to ease his fear.

She was caught off guard when the little boy flung himself into arms, forcing her to land on her backside, as he hugged her fiercely. Her arms wound around him as she rubbed small circles into his back.

"Are you alright?" She whispered into his mop of brown curls.

He nodded and pulled back, hands cupping her face.

Her heart string tugged at his adorable little face, eyes chocolate brown in adoration, a chubby dimpled smile pulled wide…..wait? she knew that dimpled smile, her heart stammered as she heard him running towards her.

"Roland! Son are you alright?"

Son? Oh my god, this was Robin's child…she suddenly felt dizzy as the one person she was desperately trying to avoid crashed down into the dirt beside her, his arms pulling the little boy from his arms into a hard embrace.

She stared, stunned. This was Robin's son….

Blue eyes met whiskey brown, for a minute the entire world fell away, surrounding just the two of them.

"Thank You" He whispered out to her.

She couldn't form words, her throat tight in constriction. She simply nodded.

He had a son. A beautiful little boy


	7. Chapter 7

She watched from afar, the cheery little boy running to and forth between the group, dodging between legs and cloaks. It went on for hours, or so it may have seemed, her mind so focused on that little gleeful giggling that kept the forest alive. Her heart did not know how to beat properly since she realized who his father was. She felt a mix between nausea and fearful joy. After all this time, and everything that happened, Robin had this beautiful little child, and most likely his wife was around somewhere. Maybe they had been separated during the curse, maybe they were to be reunited.

Her eyes flickered up to him, watching the carefree nature of his smile, the ease in his stride as he bumped shoulders heartily with Charming, the two getting on in an instant. The pit in her stomach growing as she stared, they hadn't spoken since she saved Roland. And even then, it wasn't a conversation, just a moment of thank-you and then she abruptly left him with his son.

She had noticed he tried to come talk to her a few times, during the journey back to her castle. He tried to catch her eyes, find a quiet moment during their walks where she stood alone, but each time she evaded him. He'd given up after a while, with a stubborn understanding he had left her alone.

Her mind wandered, wondering what her own son was doing, where he was, if he was happy, did he have some sort of missing connection. She longed for him, the deep rooted ache pouring into her soul with every step. How was she ever supposed to be happy without him. Her easy answer, was that she wasn't. There was no happiness without him. Again she was forced by circumstances out of her control to be banished to a life alone, with her grief and anger the only companions by her side.

 _How fitting for the Evil Queen_ she grimaced.

Her feet stopped unconsciously, as they came upon a field of lavender, thick, plush and purple as the wind wound through it. The subtle aroma gently cascading around her. They were getting closer to her castle, these fields had many a time been her secret solace where she would lay, hidden from prying eyes, allowed to just breathe for a moment.

A tug on her black cape, drew her back from the memories. Frowning as to who would dare interrupt her, she found no one within her gaze. A second tug whirled her around in a huff, but the little giggle that whispered as she spun pulled an involuntary small smile across her lips. Arching an eyebrow, her chin tilted high with a smirk, her heeled boots turned slowly to the right, shoulders following at a turtle's pace. She saw his brown cloak brush the ground, behind her as he moved silently. With a sudden motion, she twirled the other way, catching the little boy by surprise. He bellowed in laughter as he ran into the field.

She smiled, watching the flowers part where he sprinted through. His brown mop of curly hair came bouncing back into view as he skidded to a halt in front of her, a chubby dimpled smile beaming up that the Evil Queen. Kneeling down, she smiled back gently and was completely taken aback when a bundle of purple flowers was thrust in front of her.

"What's this for?" she questioned as she took the bouquet, inhaling deeply at it's sweet smell.

"For saving me" Roland bounced on his tip toes "and because Papa says pretty ladies should always have flowers"

Her smiled faltered at the memories of countless bouquets of wildflowers that would grace her vanity each week, tied simply with braided grass, a secret gesture all their own.

"Thank You, they are beautiful" she leaned over, kissing the crown on the boy's head before sitting back down on her knees, her eyes suddenly clouding with tears as Henry's hazel green flooded in.

"Majesty, why are you sad?" The young merry boy closed the distance between them, resting a soft hand on her cheek as a sole tear escaped. She found his eyes staring at her with a thick intensity, worried beyond what a toddler ever needed to be. Swallowing heavy, she did what she did best, forced her emotions to the back. She took the gentle moment to look over the toddler, his skin a touch bronzed by the sun, chocolate button eyes, deep set dimples, unruly brown hair. The only physical similarity between him and his father were the dimples, but everything else was from his mother.

"Roland?!" A booming voice broke their soft minute, and with a happy "Bye Majesty", the young boy took off, into the arms of his awaiting father, who tossed the boy into the air with a laugh, catching him safely before hugging him in tight. Standing, Regina brushed the few bits of dirt from her leather pants, adjusting the tight corset, groaning at the constriction of the garment. Watching father and son laugh together, her heart pained, a strange yearning prickling.

Roland leaned in to whisper a secret in his father's ears, whose expression immediately widened with a surprise. Her fingers gripped the bundle of lavender as Robin's eyes slowly turned to meet hers, soft in essence but there was that lingering sadness behind them. She held his gaze for a moment, waiting to see if he would be angry once more, waiting for him to say something, or maybe say nothing at all, she wasn't really sure which would be worse.

His eyes flickered down to the clenched flowers, and a crooked small smile formed as he looked back up at her. Her lips twinged into a fractional smile in return, but her eyes broke their gaze. Staring back out at the purple fields, she forced the lump in her throat back down, letting the warmth of the sun caress her skin. When she turned back, Robin was gone, walking back towards the group with Roland settled on his hip. Finding the sun once more, she realized that they weren't going to make it to the castle by nightfall, they'd have to camp. The thought loathed within, the absolute last thing she wanted to do was be with this group any longer. All she truly wanted was to be in the steel and stone walls once more, where she would be able to live out the rest of her days in seclusion.

Catching up to the group, it seemed they had already come to the same conclusion, the Merry Men breaking off and pitching tents between the trees, the dwarves building a fire pit within a matter of seconds, Snow and Charming instructing a few to gather wood, while others took off into the forest for hunting. She stood silent, watching in unamused reverence.

"Regina?" She jumped, not hearing him come up from behind. With a thick exhale she rolled her eyes, stalking off before he could get out another word. She moved between the trees, finding a section of clearing away from the group, and with a wave of her hand, a tent faded into view. Sighing, she walked inside, shucking off the heavy cloak, shivering as the cold air danced on her exposed skin. A lantern was lit within a second, warming the tent a little as she sat on the thick bedding of furs. Her boots were untied, the corset following suit, letting her ribs expand freely finally. Her eyes closed as she lay down on the bed, in her simple white cotton laced undershirt and leather pants. In the distance, the singing of the merry man roared out, their festivities in full swing.

Scoffing, she rolled to her side, hugging into the blanket and pillow. Her stomach grumbled, but there was no movement, she didn't need to wait for them to cook something, she could have an entire feast made with the flick of her finger tips. But something held her back, she was hungry there was no question, but she was in a battle between wanting to eat, and not wanting to be around those people, and for whatever loathsome reason, using her magic suddenly felt like cheating.

"You should eat something"

Her heart clenched at his voice permeating through her tent, but she wasn't in any mood for another emotional battle.

"What do you want Robin" her tone blunt and sharp as she refused to turn over.

She could hear his huff, and swore she could feel the roll of his blue eyes, but the sinking of the mattress behind her was unsettling.

"I want you to eat something" he grumbled.

"Why?" she snarked back.

"You are still stubborn you know that"

Annoyed she rolled over, pitching her body up on her elbows as her eyes drilled holes into him with a scowl. "I'm the stubborn one?" Her eyebrow arched high.

He glared back at her for a moment, but his heart was beating an a near unbearable pace. The smooth olive tone, soft swell of her chest, gently freckled along the column of her neck, disappearing into the hard set jaw line, painted by full red lips. Her long ebony hair, curling softly on her shoulders, easy in its waves, and Robin could have sworn she still had that warm honey apple smell.

She watched his eyes roam her body subtly, lingering on her lips before flickering up to her eyes once more. She was thankful for the uproar of laughter from the camp fire or else she would have bet her thundering pulse would have been echoed inside the quiet tense tent.

They held each other's eyes for a long moment, getting lost in one another while trying to keep some semblance of anchor to reality. It seemed so easy, to just sit here together, silent and let the memories of a lifetime long past fill the void.

Regina shuffled, finally, drawing her knees up to her chest, breaking the contact of his eyes, the loss immediately felt by both parties, though either voiced any of their dismay. Robin let out a quiet chuckle, placing a plate of food in between them. Her long fingers plucked a grape, letting the sweet juices coat her dry mouth.

"He's beautiful" she finally murmured, tilting her head slightly to look at him as he frowned in curiosity.

"Your boy, those dimples are going to slay a lot of hearts when he is older" Regina smiled, looking back down at the plate as Robin chuckled "Indeed, my boy certainly has a way to worm into the hearts of many beautiful women" His blue eyes searching hers for a heavy moment, smiling as he saw the bundle of lavender laying softly on the pillow behind her.

She couldn't help herself, the sudden curiosity that bloomed.

"Where's his mother?" her voice wavering as she swallowed thickly waiting for the answer she didn't know she was all of a sudden dreading on hearing. His wife was somewhere, possibly here and she just hadn't realized, or maybe he was in search of her still.

She watched his expression drop, a sad crossing of anguished lines forming as his lips pursed together tightly. She waited tensely, holding a breath unknowingly.

His hand rubbed through the sandy blonde hair as he sighed heavily "My wife passed before the curse"

Her heart sank, understanding the devastating pain of losing a loved one far too well. Her voice shook slightly with the whispering acknowledgment "Robin, I'm so sorry". He smiled small, shaking his head before righting himself "It was a long time ago now, Roland was barely a newborn when she died. He will never know his mother, and for that I am most sorry"

She didn't know what compelled her to do it, but her hand reached out for his, the warming tingle spreading through her palm, and she wondered if he felt it to. They never discussed it, even in their youth, this strange flicker of electricity whenever they would touch. Regina assumed it was her magic, something only she, for whatever reason felt.

He smiled, squeezing her hand back, letting the tingling spread through him, working it's way to his heart setting it in a low glow of warmth. "You know, I never said thank-you for that day" he sighed, finding her eyes once more.

She smiled quietly, the memory filling in her mind…..

..

...

 *****Flashback 1 Year Before The Curse******

The black horses slammed to a halt, jolting the carriage, rattling the Queen from her dazed mindless staring. She growled, flinging the door open.

"What happened?" she snarled at the coachman who cowered in his seat

"Your Majesty, there is news of Snow White" a guard rode up beside her, stammering in his voice.

Her heart fluttered, the oxygen sapped from the air for a moment.

"What Information?" her voice thick in venom as she stared at the guard.

"She is being harbored in a village not two miles from here"

In an instant, she grab the reigns of Rocinante, rearing the stallion into a gallop. The tree's raced by her and they sprinted down the pathway, her knights following hotly behind. Her pulse reverberated in her ears, this time she would finally get her, finally get her revenge on that brat, the girl who ruined her entire life. Finally.

Rocinante stole through the tree's, winding and galloping like the wind until the brimming of thatched roof tops came into view. Rearing into the village, she jumped off the stallion, as the villagers froze in her sudden appearance.

Breathing heavy, her heeled boot stalled the rolling of an apple. She glared at the peasants, their heavy farming smell infiltrating her system, reminding her to fully of the stable boy she had lost, it was nauseating in memory.

"Where is Snow White?" she growled, stalking towards the line of scared townspeople. No one breathed a word as they shook on the spot, all to aware of what the Evil Queen could and would certainly do.

Stomping up and down their wall, she glared, a fireball erupting from her palms as she snarled "Anyone who defies me, will suffer the consequences. Now where is she?".

She felt the loathing stare of a woman, her chocolate eyes deep set in a frown as the long thick curly waves fell about the maroon cape that hung off her shoulders. "She isn't here" the peasant retorted hotly.

The Queen swung around, her blood red cape swirling in the wind. Foolish peasant, daring to speak out against her. She strut forward, clutching the woman's coffee skin in her fingers.

"Then where is she?" the Evil Queen growled.

The woman stood stiffly, pulling her chin from the Queens grip "She's not here, Your Majesty. She never was".

Regina shook with anger, staring at the peasant with daggers, yet something within the woman's eyes was true. Snow White wasn't here.

Huffing, Regina stalked past the woman, hooking a heel into Rocinante straps before jumping into the saddle. She began to ride away, but a scream halted her progress, turning around she counted only 4 out of 6 black knights flanking her.

Frowning she turned back, annoyed at their absence but the scene in front of her made her blood run hot. The peasant that had stood against her now scrambled in the dirt as two black knights, pulled her back. They cackled as she screamed for help, but the villagers stood in frozen fear.

Flipping the woman over, one of the knights held a sword to the woman's' neck as the other began to tear at her clothing. Regina halted, stunned for a moment, not fully comprehending that her knights were actually capable of doing something this hideous. After everything she had suffered through, no matter the vengeance and darkness of her heart, this was something she never would condone.

With a flick of her wrist, the knights froze in their place, leaving the woman fearfully panting as she stared up between the knights and the Evil Queen. Regina slid of her stallion once more, stomping up to the men who stared at her in panic. The words failed them as she huffed in malice. The villagers screamed as the knights fell to the ground, grasping their necks against an invisible suffocating grip. They fell to the floor hard, smacking into the dirt with a last wheezing breath.

The Queen trembled as she fought back the bile that rose in her throat as she spun around, ready to leave this revolting place.

"Marion? Marion are you alright?"

She didn't see him, but heard his voice from behind her. A scared cry for the woman who lay on the ground still. Her heart clenched as she turned to find him kneeling down beside the brunette.

The woman nodded, clutching his hands as her forehead rested into his. Regina was rooted in shock as Robin's hands fell to the young girl's' abdomen, cradling it gently.

"We are both fine, Robin. The Queen ….. "

The brunettes words failed to hit Regina's ears as blue eyes suddenly crashed into hers. The world seemingly tilting on it's axis as everything but him faded from existence. She hadn't seen him since that night in the tavern, though she heard whispers of his whole "steal from the rich, give to the poor" motto, this was the first time since she had called him a bandit and set a price on his head, that his eyes were actually looking straight into hers. His jaw had dropped open, the ocean hue of his gaze swallowing her whole.

"Robin?" the maid's soft voice piercing their stunned moment. Regina pulled back as though shocked by fire, shaking her head frantically as she scrambled back onto the saddle of Rocinante.

 _"The Queen…..she stopped the knights…she saved Marian….why would she….."_ a whisper of words flowed through the shocked townspeople. She reared on the reigns of her stallion, setting him into a steady trot as her now 4 guards followed suit in silence. It was just a moment her heart betrayed her stoney mask, and her head turned around, only to find him standing, facing her with a strange anguished expression on his face. She wanted so desperately to stop, to race back to him, to hug him tight, beg for his forgiveness for everything she had done. Her lower lip trembled as wetness began to brim into her thick lashes, maybe she could, maybe it would be okay... but her heart clenched as she tore her eyes from his as the maid she had just spared, intertwined her fingers with his, her hand laying softly on the small swell of her stomach.

He had a wife, and a child on the way. And though she was happy he had found love, a beautiful woman to call his wife, and a child on the way. He wasn't hers, she gave him up long ago. Regina's heart crashed and bled for the life she so desperately wanted, and though she would never admit it aloud, it was a life, she had thought about often….with him.

..

...

 ***** Present Day *****

She sat quiet, focusing on the warmth of his hand.

"That's twice you have saved my son" he smiled.

Regina's eyebrows creased as her eyes moved up to his, but she said nothing. The sudden swell of her heart, booming through the uncertainty of her mind. This couldn't happen, no matter what she was beginning to feel, it was only because of their past, a past that has been tainted beyond repair. She pulled her hand from his, noticing the slight grimace in his face at the action.

"Thank you for the food" Her tone blunt as she lay back down on the bed, turning her back to him once more. She heard his sigh at her sudden departure, and she had to fight off the urge to turn back around.

"You're welcome Your Majesty"

He stood from the mattress, parting the tent flaps as he began to leave.

"Don't call me that" her voice halting him in his motions. The way it tremored struck a knife through his heart as he turned to her. Avoiding his gaze still, she curled her knees into her chest, letting her long waves fall down her back as she faced the side of the tent.

His heart burned for her, but there was still too much to sort through, it wasn't as simple as his body was apparently deciding. He turned back to the night, ready to make way to his fellow Merry Men, yet not ready to leave her quite yet.

"Good Night, Regina" he whispered before leaving, not hearing the shake of her voice back as she whispered a sad good night back to him.


	8. Chapter 8

The journey back to the castle was uneventful, and Regina was thankful for that. She was tired, tired of being strapped into these corsets and high boots, tired of being stared at by nearly everyone, tired of the small gazes she would find Robin throwing at her.

They hadn't spoken, not much at least. She kept her distance, save for the little dimpled boy that apparently had taken quite the shining to the Queen. Most of her walk was spent with him beside her, babbling on about nonsense and tales of the Merry Men, how brave his papa was, the fact little John couldn't shoot a turkey. Regina laughed, smiled at the effervescent nature of the toddler. It never ceased to shake her heart, when his little hands would grab onto hers, swinging them gently as he talked. The stares from the group at the duo didn't go unnoticed by the Queen, but damn them all to hell. If this made Roland happy, then she was more than willing.

The castle came into view, and she shuddered. All the memories of that place flooding her mind. She never thought she would be here again. She hadn't realized she stopped until the tug on her hand brought her back.

"Gina, why did you stop?" the toddler questioned.

She smiled, small as it may have been, "I just never thought I'd be back at the castle that's all"

"Are you nervous?" his button brown eyes full on unknown concern.

She knelt down, cupping his cheek softly "No, I have my most brave knight with me"

Roland smiled, throwing his arms around Regina in a tight hug "I'll protect you majesty, just like you protected me"

The tears brimmed in her eyes as she hugged the little boy back, memories of her own son pulling to the surface.

"Your Majesty?" Little John came from behind them, eyebrows raised at the display of affection. He didn't know quite how to handle the new relationship between the boy and Queen. It didn't seem right that Roland should be spending this much time with the woman, but if Robin allowed it then he wouldn't speak against it, until it was necessary.

Regina stood, brushing off the dirt from her dress.

"What can I do for you?" she dead panned.

John shuffled nervously "Snow White asked for you"

Regina rolled her eyes, of course she did. Smiling one last time at Roland, she stalked off to the front of the group.

"I heard you summoned me" She snarked.

Snow sighed "I only asked for you to come help"

Regina waited hands on her hips "Well?"

David pulled into view "The castle is just around the corner, we thought it would only be appropriate if you went first."

She scoffed "Why, so I can be roasted if there is any traps. Can't risk marring your pretty face"

"Regina! That's not what he meant" Snow huffed in exasperation. "All we are saying is that it's your castle -"

"You made it quite clear it was your's" Regina retorted

"-As much as it is yours. We aren't going to take it away from you. We want to be there beside you" Snow calmly replied.

It took Regina aback, surely they weren't serious. This entire time she had assumed they would take ownership as they had demanded for years and she as per her plan would live out the rest of her days alone. Stealing the sudden shock, she rolled her eyes, throwing her mask on quickly.

"Fine"

She walked up to the edge, and a tingling on magic ran through her spine. It wasn't hers she was sure of that. It felt thick, an ivy smell dwelling around it. It was new, unknown to her and it felt dark.

"Regina?" Snow's voice timidly called from behind her. Regina huffed at their impatience, it's a damn good thing she was going first or else who ever tried to touch this barrier most likely would have been shot back a 100 yards.

Her palm ghosted up, letting a spiral of magic twirl and cascade out in ripples. There didn't seem to be much of a blockade to break, a simple barrier spell. Easy enough, the Queen smirked as her magic erupted in a fiery billow, shredding the kindergarten attempt at keeping her out. She hears the shocked gasps of the group behind her as the wall vanishes into ash and she smiles to herself.

"Do you think it's safe to cross?" David pulls up beside her.

"Well you're the brave hero, why don't you let us know" She deviously smiles, knowing that no harm will come to the annoying Prince regardless. He steps, hesitantly across the line and exhales a sigh of relief when nothing attack or sets him on fire.

"Seem's like you did it" David jests

"You seriously doubted me?" Regina quips back.

They move, towards the castle, the group buzzing as the thick oak doors and steel steps come into closer view. There is an air of excitement that rolls about them, hesitant but filled with curious wonder. Not many had actually stepped foot into the Queen's Castle.

The lump in her throat grows as her steps draw closer, closer to the place she never wanted to see again, closer to the caged life she was forced into. The shake in her palms goes unnoticed as she crosses her arms, trying to exude an air of boredom, but she is sweating inside, the knots churning and rolling as the dwarves haul the massive wooden doors open.

They file in, gasps and awe struck expressions as they walk through the Castle main foyer. It's stunning still, ominous and dark, black granite lining the floors, dark grey stone covered by dusted banners of the Queen's symbol. She's left alone, unable to move inside as the group continues in front of her without notice. Staring into the hall, her heart is thundering, it's as though she never left.

"Are you alright?"

She shudders at his voice, clenching her jaw as he comes up from behind her, standing just close enough so their shoulders brush gently. For a moment Robin says nothing, simply gazes around the cold palace walls, knowing at least a fraction of the reluctance of the woman beside him to venture forth.

" I can't imagine this place brings back many happy memories for you" he whispers solemnly, casting a glance in her direction. The torment in her eyes tugs at his heart strings, her skin a touch paler than a few hours before. She looks truly terrified to step foot into the Castle, and he understands, but there isn't much they can do at this point but face it head on.

Regina stands still as a statue, debating whether to move or run. There are too many horrible images running through her mind, the life as the Evil Queen plaguing her. Her voice shakes, and barely registers in his ears as she mumbles "I just never thought I'd have to come back here"

He aches to touch her, pull her into his arms and promise she will be fine. But they aren't there, he doesn't really know where they are. It's complicated to say the least, but he can't deny how wonderful it is to just be beside her again.

"Nothing can hurt you inside Regina. Not anymore" He smiles turning to her slightly.

She scoffs "You think I'm afraid of my own Castle?" her tone is sharp but her eyes give her away.

"You'd have every right to be if you were" Robin smoothly replies.

Regina turns, catching his beautiful blue eyes that are filled with safety, the crook of his smile pulling out the dimples behind the blonde scruff. It's crazy that he is here right now, with her, back here, where everything changed. She doesn't know what compels her to say it, and the words fall out before she can register them.

"Please don't tell anyone about our history here…."

Robin grimaces, and finds her hand, interlacing their fingers together with a small sad smile "I promise, whenever you're ready I'll be there with you" His lips press to her knuckles and the heat flares through her veins. Her mind is torn between falling into tears and slamming him back for the public affection, small as it may have been. She freezes, and does nothing instead, simply returns the small smile before inhaling heavy and making her way into the Castle.

..

...

...

Everyone has crowded into the dining hall, the chatter bursting through the room as she moves towards the Charmings. Snow looks up hopefully but with questions. Regina's heart burns, _for one damn minute can she not be the inquisition!_

"What is it Snow?" She asks before the princess can say anything. With a sheepish smile Snow bites down on her lower lip "Well, everyone is hungry, and it's kind of late to go out hunting….."

 _Of course,_ Regina rolls her eyes and with a flick of her wrist the expansive wooden table in the middle of the hall is flooded with food. The crowd roars at the sight, hesitating for a moment before hunger gets the best of them. Snow nods a thank you and pulls Charming with her to a bench, settling in to eat.

In an instant there is laughter and cheering, ale goblets clink together and food is passed around. It seems ridiculous to her that while there is an unknown threat looming, here they all are having a riot pretending nothing's the matter.

Henry's face fills her mind, he would have loved to have seen this. Princes' and Princesses, Merry Men and Dwarves all together in an Enchanted Castle. Her heart aches heavy, running like a thick dagger into her soul. A sad sigh escapes her and she moves from the hall without a second glance from the patrons. The heels of her boots click as she mounts the steps, slowly crawling back through time. Nothing has changed, her protection spell on the Castle seemed to have worked, everything is immaculate as she had left it.

At the time she didn't know why she was taking such care of a place she wished to never see, but it had become her life, a desolate place but her home none the less. Torches light the pathway as she rounds the corner, and there it is. The intricate wooden oak door, standing like dangerous portal at the end of the hallway. Her breath trembles as she slowly moves towards it, her hand shaking violently against the cold frame.

Leaning heavy, her forehead rests against the wood as tears flood into her eyes. This wasn't supposed to be her life. She was supposed to be happy with Henry, not back here in this hell hole. A sob chokes in her throat as the door slowly opens, creaking in its unused state. The tears flow freely now, as her room comes into view. It's the exact same. From the massive black birch bed, to the dark vanity in the corner, even her jewelry still sits neatly in the boxes. She cries as her fingers run along the plethora of gowns in the boudoir, the constricting bodices or corsets and cloaks.

Rage boils through her as she find the wedding gown stuffed in the far back corner. The day her entire life was thrown into this dungeon. She screams, tearing the dress from its hanger. The silk rips under her nails as she pulls it apart, sobbing with each diamond that falls to the floor. How unfair it is to be the Queen. Her mind is gone as she cries, tearing the dress lace by lace, strip by strip, and she falls to her knees, desperately trying to suck in the oxygen that evades her pulsing lungs.

Everything is hazy, her heart beat pounding in her ears as she sobs into the white gown. Her body shudders and wracks with each scream that pierces through the cold bedchambers. She doesn't hear him from her tormented crouched position on the floor, but suddenly arms are wrapping around her waist, pulling her away from the shredded dress. She know's it's him, no one else would dare.

The tears fall harder as he tugs her into his arms, holding her impossibly tight to his chest as his fingers threaded through her fallen hair. Sitting in between his legs she clutches to his shirt, sobbing and beating against his hard chest as he rocks her back and forth as he hushes and soothes her with whispering words.

He is falling apart as she cries into his chest, the whimpering tears tugging at every part of his soul. It's not fair that she should have to endure this all over again, memories or not. His face tucks into her hair as he pulls her in tighter, one arm looping around her back as the other wraps around her abdomen and into her hair. He doesn't concentrate on the honey apple scent of her, nor the proximity of her body to his, he only focuses on the breaking heart that is shattering in her chest.

"It's okay, breathe Regina, breathe" he murmurs into her hair.

Her words are short and broken through the tears as she grips him harder "I ca-can't do this. It's too ha-hard" She chokes harshly.

His forehead dips to rest on the crown of her head, his lips pressing against her temple softly "It's alright Regina. It's going to be okay, I promise".

They sit there for minutes unnoticed, Robin gently swaying their bodies back and forth as her tears begin to dry, the tempo of her breathing slowly returning to normal as she leans heavily into his arms. He doesn't say anything, just waits for her, as he always promised he would. It's strange, after everything in their past, suddenly the resentment is fading. He lays his cheek against her, a palm coasting up and down her bare arm. He can feel the chill on her skin and as if on cue, she shivers.

"You're freezing" he murmurs, pulling back a fraction to look for something to warm her with. The tension in her body is sudden, her spine stiffens instantly as he moves.

"How did you know where I was?" Her tone faltering as she looks up to catch his eyes. Robin smiles, as his eyes rake over her tear stained features, even now she looks beautiful, tragically so.

"I didn't see you at dinner….I just kind of figured you'd be here" He shrugs.

"And how exactly did you get in?" Her eyebrow arches playfully as she goes to wipe the remnants of wetness from her cheeks, but Robin beats her to it. The smooth swipe of his thumb, easing away her tears "It's not my first time stealing into the Queen's chambers", he chuckles biting down on his lip with a smirk, hoping it was the right thing to say.

Thankfully, Regina smiles back, watery as it may be, it's there behind the trembling of her jaw and the fresh waves of tears in her thick lashes.

"Hey, don't cry. I'm sorry" He pulls her back into his chest with a wave of guilt. He squeezes her shoulders, and buries into the crook of her neck, whispering apologies into the ebony curled locks.

Her heart in thundering, and she would venture it's not because of where she is anymore, but rather who is with her. It feels all to familiar, him holding her like a fragile doll, the easy forest smell caressing her every inhale, the tenderness of his voice vibrating into her skin.

"Who would have thought we'd ever be here again, together" she mumbles out into the tear stained green tunic. Robin lets out a gentle rumble of laughter into her hair before moving back to find her eyes.

"Thank You" she whispers as their gaze lock onto each other, and she can feel the vulnerable embarrassment of their predicament filling into her cheeks. She goes to turn, but his fingers catch her cheek, stearing her back to him. They are impossibly close, bumping noses as Robin leans in to rest his forehead to hers. She can taste the ale and mint on his breath being this close. What would it be like to just close that fraction of space right now….she's not sure if what she is feeling is a result of her broken heart, or something else, something long forgotten that is thrumming back to life once more. But there is a high chance, he doesn't feel the same way, more so probably feels some strange obligation or whatever. That's why he must be here, there is too much painful history for him to be feeling the same flutter in his his heart as she is.

He brushes a curl of hair behind her ear, drowning in the sad beauty of her face. It's too natural to be here like this, after years and years, his heart is actually beating back to life again, astoundingly because of the one person who truly broke it in the first place. The irony is not lost on him. They need time, time to reconnect, to relearn and to resolve everything and as much as he wishes to lean in that fraction and taste her full red lips, he knows that it's not that moment. They may never have that moment, but it certainly would only cause more confusion now.

With a smile, his lips press into her forehead instead, "Always Regina"

She hums and lets herself sink back into him for another few seconds.

"You need some sleep"

"I need a drink" she quips with a chuckle and Robin laughs, thankful that maybe for now her torture can be put aside.

Moving back from her but not losing contact, Robin stands, pulling Regina to her feet with a confused look. "Well, there is plenty of ale downstairs M'lady. Can I escort her Majesty?"

Swallowing hard, she stops following his lead, her eyes turning the the open doors of the balcony.

"Regina?" he steps back into her space with concern.

"I think I'll stay here. But you go. I'll be fine"

The quiver in her voice doesn't convince him, but the press of her palm to his chest halts his movements closer to her. He waits as she exhales heavy, stealing her emotions back down "Honestly Robin. I'm okay. Thank You"

"Are you certain?"

Regina nods, and Robin catches her falling hand into his own. "Then I shall see you for breakfast"

The Queen smiles as the thief presses a kiss into her knuckles with a whispered promise "You know where to find me, if you need me"

"Thank You"

He lingers, but drops her hand before stepping back to the door, leaving her with a wink and a goofy smile before closing the door behind him.

And then there is nothing but silence again, just the long lost Queen and the prison she thought she had escaped.

..

...

...

The night is chilled as he sits on the grassy hill, mindlessly braiding blades of grass in his fingers. Nothing about the past week had gone to his expectation. He thought if he ever saw Regina again he would be rage fueled, yelling and demanding. Yet instead he finds himself leaning against a tree just underneath her balcony, wondering about the brunette that hopefully found some sleep inside.

This warmth in his heart hadn't died down, and it's fire was burning hotter than ever. He knew he loved Marian, would do anything for her, adored her, and would have walked through hell to get her back. But it wasn't the same. It wasn't that he loved his wife any less, but this glowing pulse in every beat of his heart wasn't comparable.

He twisted the ends of the grassy blades into a knot, trailing his fingers back up the threaded pieces and he smiled at the thought that Regina remembered the braids herself. Something that was so small and yet just thiers. Exhaling hard, his head hangs, could it be possible that after all this time, she was back, could he forgive her for everything…. does he love her even to this day…?

"You seem lost in thought"

He jolts at the sound of a woman's voice, turning quickly to find the intruder only to be basked in a red glittering glow.

"It's just me" The ruby shine begins to fade and there is the fairy from years ago beaming at him with her crinkled grin.

"Rosetta!" He is shocked to say the least as he smiles back.

"Hello Handsome!" She moves and settles on the grass beside him, her magic fluttering in golden shimmers as she hunkers down. "How are you Robin?"

He sighs "I'm alright, and you? I confess I didn't expect to see you again"

Rosetta chuckles, and throws a palm to her heart animatedly "You don't want to see me! I'm hurt"

Robin laughs, shaking his head as he grabs her palm and kisses the back of it with a smile "Just surprised that's all"

The fairy giggles and rolls her eyes through the blush on her mocha skin "How are you?"

"I'm alright, you already asked that"

Rosetta turns and Robin's heart stutters for a moment, the look in the dark brown eyes swirling in a deeper understanding than the simple question she posed. He knows that isn't truly what she was going for, and he slumps back into the hill with a heavy exhale.

"I don't know how I am in truth"

"What's on your mind?"

Robin stares up at the stars, sparkling diamonds in a jet black tar. His mind wanders to his own diamond, being drown in her own sad dark world. He still can't understand the feelings himself, and isn't sure that voicing them outloud would do any good.

"Do you still have that vial of Pixie Dust I gave you?" Rosetta lays down beside him.

Robin nods "I've never touched it since the day you gave it to me"

"Why is that"

He frowns, the ache in his heart heavy "I just don't think I can offer what that woman truly needs"

"Any particular woman you have in mind?" The red fairy smiles gently.

"No" It's a lie that drips sour on his tongue as it slides. All he can see is her.

Rosetta hums, twirling her fingers in the air absently, allowing the quiet night to surround them for a few minutes.

"The Queen is quite something" She breaks the moment with pursed lips.

He doesn't hear the underlying tone of play in her voice, he's simply too focused on the chocolate eyes that he could drown in, the long curls of dark hair, creamy olive skin, and perfect red lips as he mutters a simple "yeah she is"

Rosetta turns on her hip, holding her head up as ringlets of auburn hair fall around her kind face. "Are you curious where the Pixie Dust could lead you?".

"I suppose. A happy ending? Sounds nice in theory" He half heartedly mumbles back.

The fairy drums her fingers on the grass, twitching her nose slightly through the curious expression. "Do you ever wonder about that ending? The woman who it will lead you to?"

His eyebrows knit together as he frowns slightly "I haven't ever thought about it to be honest. I have no idea who she could be, or where she is for that matter"

"Are you afraid to find out?"

"In a way. I don't have much to offer. I'm an outlaw, with a son and a band of Merry Men as my family. Not exactly the life every woman dreams of being caught in"

"You have much more to offer than just being an outlaw Robin of Locksley" Rosetta sits up, pulling Robin with her. She turns to find his eyes, filled with too many emotions to truly deal with right now and she understands.

"When the time is right, you'll know, and Pixie Dust never lies" The red fairy smiles, patting his blonde stubbled cheek as he smiles small back in return.

"Thank You Rosetta, Truly"

"You can thank me when you have found her. I'll see you soon" She leaves him with a soft kiss on the cheek and fades into the glowing red orb before disappearing completely. He sighs, picking up the braided grass.

His gaze flickers up to the balcony, and he wonders if maybe he didn't need Pixie Dust, maybe he could be happy without ever knowing who that woman is


	9. Chapter 9

Weeks had passed, and Regina kept herself closed off, locked away in her bed chambers, staring absently as the sun rose and fell, day after day, the moon climbing and falling, night after night. Nothing felt right, felt okay, felt happy. The hole in her heart to deep to fill. She barely slept, rarely ate, just sat on her balcony, wrapped in a blanket letting time slowly tick by.

Charming and Snow had effectively taken over the Castle, reigning as they so desired, and in truth Regina couldn't care less. Snow had stopped trying to get her to come to council meetings, the Queen's chair sat empty. A solid oak void no one dared touch.

Robin felt her absence, and twice he had tried to see her, ensure she was alright. But the door was locked, and he knew she didn't want to be disturb, even by him. But every morning he would leave a lavender flower at her door and every night it would be gone. It was his only tether to the fact she was alright. But it was nearing two months now and the Queen had barely been seen and he was truly beginning to worry for her.

"Someone has to talk to her. It can't be healthy to live alone like this" David huffed out at the large dining table.

"I agree, but Regina is in a fragile state. Robin have you been to see her?" Snow questioned, eyeing the troubled thief.

"Why would you assume she would talk to me?" He retorted back.

Snow smiled softly with a strange knowing look "You seem to be the only one she will talk to, other than your son at least"

It was then it dawned on Robin, his son had been asking for weeks about seeing his Majesty, but it wasn't till now he realized that maybe his boy was the key to opening up Regina. He hummed to himself, wondering if it was crass to use his son, but Regina couldn't stay hold up forever. They disembarked from the table, going separate ways.

..

...

...

Later that evening that Robin brought a very enthusiastic young Roland up to hopefully see the Queen. His heart pounded with each step they took, a small flicker of guilt at using his son.

"Papa, where has Majesty been? I haven't seen her forever!" Roland chimed, skipping in front of his father joyfully.

"She's just been busy son"

"Do you think she will like the flowers?" the bouquet of wildflowers held up high.

"She will love them, my boy" Robin smiled, and then here they were, standing in front of the oak door. His knuckles rapped softly at first, but was met with silence. Roland frowned "Papa where is majesty?"

The sadness in his boy's eyes tore at his heart. He knocked a bit more incessantly this time, calling out her name. Still nothing.

"Roland my boy, why don't you try to call out to her?" Robin mused, hoping it would work.

His chubby hands patted the door with a soft "Majesty?"

A moment passed by and Robin's heart sank at the sad pull on his son's expression. The flowers dropping to hang low.

"Maybe she is sleeping my boy. We will try again tomorrow" He took Roland's hand, and turned to walk away.

"Roland?"

Her voice was soft, as the thick door creaked open.

"MAJESTY!" His son beamed, turning back to fly into her awaiting arms. They hugged tight, Regina smiling into the boy's messy curls. She look frail, thin, her cheekbones protruding out harshly against the pale alabaster skin. She'd lost the rosy complexion in her cheeks, the red tint in her lips.

"Are you still busy Majesty, or can we play?" Roland pulled back, staring up at Regina's warm eyes.

"I always have time to play with my most brave knight" She smiled, settling Roland on her hip as she stood. Her gaze flickered up, caught by a bright blue smile.

"Hi" he eased out

"Hi" she whispered back.

"He's missed you" …. _I've missed you_ …. His mind calling out silently.

"Me too" she snuggled the boy in tighter though her eyes lingered on his.

"I'll leave you two alone?" His eyes falling for a second, not wanting to leave her, but understanding the small steps she needed.

"No! Papa stay and play with us!" Roland bellowed out. Frowning deeply at his father.

She laughed quietly, turning with Roland in her arms, leaving the door welcome open. Robin followed, trying to keep the swelling of his heart to a minimum as he closed the door, encapsulating them into her small bubble of safety. Roland ran around the expansive chambers, giggling as he bounced on the Queen's enormous bed. Regina soaked it all in, it had been overwhelmingly quiet but she supposes that was her own fault.

Robin sat in the chair across from the bed, laughing as his son hopped and jumped and flopped around on the bed. His eyes couldn't help but continuously glance towards Regina, who was smiling, but the sadness in her face was all too evident. He didn't know what to do, what to say, so instead he just smiled, hoping that in some odd sense, maybe she would feel safe enough to let him in.

They played all evening, Roland's eyes shocked wide open when bubbles poured from Regina's hands in a flurry of glowing rainbow balls. He ran frantically around the room, swinging at the magic bubbles till they burst and he was showered with sparkles. She hadn't realized when Robin had moved, to focused on the joyful boy in front of her, but her thigh was suddenly touching his, a shoulder brushing calmly.

"Majesty, can you read me a story?" Roland bounded back into the bed.

"Roland, I think it's time for you us to leave her Majesty and go get some sleep"

"But PAPA‼‼" Roland frowned heavy, his lower lip pouting out.

Regina had to laugh at the display, puppy eyes, Henry had them down pat, regardless of what it was, she could never apparently say no to them. So she turned putting on the same sad expression as the toddler, pushing out her ruby lip in play. Robin stared astonished, he was being completely played by both his son and Regina. But the looks in their eyes, sparkling with anxiousness had his heart completely glowing. She looked beyond adorable, and his thoughts floated out to that lower lip, rose in color, plump and thick…..

"Papa?" Roland little voice distracted him, but Regina's eyebrow arched, she knew exactly why he had gone a miss for those few short seconds. She sat back tall on the bed, her mind running hard at the emotion that just welled up inside. Surely, he wasn't thinking of kissing her….was he? That look in his eyes was so familiar to years long past. Yet he had abided by her wishes, or more so her fears and never actually kissed her, more than save for three or four times. He respected what she had asked, but there was without a doubt that underlying want between both of them. And yet now after everything and all the time that had passed, she suddenly felt incredibly vulnerable and exposed to his ocean blue eyes.

Robin sensed the shift in her, the way her eyes dropped his, skating around the room instead in avoidance, her fingers fiddled with the hem of her dress, tugging an invisible thread like it was her lifeline. He sank, sighing heavily inside at her sudden absence. He shouldn't have started, but it is impossible not to. She is to beautiful, her hair too silky, her skin too soft, eyes too warm, lips too inviting. He remembers everything about her like it was yesterday and yet so much time had passed. He wasn't the same young man that was for certain, and clearly she wasn't the same girl he had lost his heart to all those years ago. But maybe he never got it back. The pixie dust flicked into his head, red and glowing, dancing like a dream.

He wondered, if maybe…..but that couldn't be…..surely not. No, he thwarted the idea, or the wish he didn't quite know how to voice. They were different now. Just friends, nothing more.

"I'll read you a story another night okay?" She cooed out to his son, pushing his unruly mess of curls away from his eyes with a smile. Roland pouted but relinquished when Regina leaned into to kiss his forehead. "Okay, Majesty…Promise?"

"I Promise" her nose wriggled against his, and their happy giggles echoed into the room.

Robin scooped up his little boy, walking to the door before Roland freed himself and tore off down the hallway. They stood silently together, Regina resting her head against the door frame as Robin turned a fraction towards her. She still looked tired, beautiful so, but he could see the exhaustion in her eyes. But this was a step, at least he had seen her. Her eyes floated up to his, nervous and unsure as she bit down on her lower lip.

"Thank You" He whispered out.

"For what?"

"Letting him in. He truly did miss you"

Regina's heart ached, for the little boy that had just run off, and especially for the young teen she had left behind. Her eyes closed in an effort to keep the tears away, and in her darkened vision, she didn't see him lean in.

His lips pressed against her cheek, softly like a cloud, his forest scent hugging her warmly.

"Good Night Regina" he mumbled into her hair, before tucking the loose strands back with his hand.

..

...

...

It seemed to work, Regina had slowly started to come around, not ever staying for long, but it was still something. She ate at the table with everyone, but said nothing and then would leave, falling back into her chambers letting the day pass. He'd taken Roland back a few times, not wanting to stifle her, but wanting to ensure maybe just for his own heart that she was alright. It tore him apart to see how thin she had become, her collarbones protruding harshly, cheeks a bit to hollow. The only time he'd even seen a hint of a smile was when Roland was around.

She may have been the Evil Queen, but that wasn't the Regina he knew. She was there, hidden behind the masks and walls, stowed away in protection.

"Majesty! Can we go ride the horses?" Roland bounced on the bed through the question.

She hesitated, biting on her lower lip. Leaving the castle wasn't something she had thought of, and it had her stomach in knots.

"Majesty?"

Shaking herself from the ebbing fear, she tried to smile, pushing the curls from his face. "If that is what would make you happy, then of course we can"

Robin's heart soared, this was his Regina, and maybe a day out in the sun, away from this prison of hers, could help.

So here he was, as the sun beat down in them, slowly meandering their way through tall grass on horse back. Roland had vehemently demanding he ride with Regina, a request she was all too willing to give into. Robin smiled, as he watched the pair in front of him, swaying back and forth gently as Roland renounced every story he knew. Regina in turn was perfect, gasping and asking for more when the toddlers stories hit a boiling point, laughing at the antics of his father's thievery, and pressing repetitive kisses into the crown of his head.

He boy was completely smitten with the Queen, and if Robin didn't know better, he'd say the feeling was mutual. It was almost comical, how he felt right now, a third wheel, absent party member to their little bubble, though his eyes did catch Regina's once or twice. And there it was, that old flame in his soul, flickering and glowing where no one be he could see.

His mind wandered, out to mostly nothing, feeling comfortable enough to just listen to the distance laughter of the Queen and his son a few paces in front. It truly was a magnificent day, warm sun with a slight breeze. His gaze floated around the meadow they were moving through, across the expansive lavender fields, and up into the sky. And then when he saw it, or them he supposes, He frowned, the sun blinding his vision at attempting to carve out what the dark shadows were that approached. His eyes clenched, blinking back the harsh light, and his heart thundered at the high pitched screeching. He turned, but it was a fraction too late as he screamed out to her in desperation.

Regina was to focused on the little boy in front to notice, but she heard it, spinning around to see the black mass diving down at her. She heard Robin yell, but her reaction was cut short as the beast pummeled into them, hauling Regina and Roland onto the dirt. It was chaos, the screaming of Roland tucked under her body and the maniacal wails of the beast that clawed above her. The pain was white hot, searing into her body at the muscles ripped under sharp claws. The beast tore at her, finding any piece of flesh it could, tearing apart her alabaster skin.

It happened in a flash, one moment he saw them on their horse, the next the winged beast had crashed into them, he panicked instantly, dismounting his own horse and nearly making it to them with an arrow drawn tight, but his motions were violently thrown back as another winged simian thrashed into him.

The beast's eyes were blood lust red, yellow sharp fangs dripping in saliva as it climbed over his body, the nails dug brutally deep into his skin. He fought, writhing and beating the thing with every part of his body, desperately trying to focus on the wailing of his son, underneath Regina.

His vision went black for a moment as claws ripped through his vest, tearing into his abdomen, the blood running hot down his sides. Dizziness surrounded him, but his mind pulled back, finding the dagger in his hip pocket and slicing into the beast above. It screamed in agony, as Robin plunged to dagger hard into it's neck, falling back as the blood poured out. The beast took off, flying half capable as black droplets of blood rained from the sky.

Robin scrambled to his feet, through the hot spikes of pain, he crashed into the other beast that was on top of Regina, slamming the winged monkey into the dirt, thankfully shattering the beast's skull on an unknown rock below. It fell silent, red eyes gone ghostly white as life evaded it's body.

He groaned harsh, crawling over the pool of blood that surrounded her. His near vomited at the sight of her ragged skin, torn and flowing in dark stickiness.

"Regina‼! REGINA‼!" he screamed, tugging his bleeding body over her own, frantically trying to find both a sign of life from her and his boy. The glowing blue bubble beamed out as he rolled Regina gingerly over, Roland cradled inside in a state of shock and fear, and yet not a scratch on him.

"PAPA!" he banged at the safety cage, unable to get out as the tears poured from his chocolate brown eyes.

"It's alright Roland! You're safe" Robin tried to appease the frantic lad, turning his eyes over to Regina who lay horridly still in his lap.

"Regina. Regina, open your eyes!" He pushed the matted blood soaked hair from her forehead, seeing her eyes flicker in unconsciousness behind her half hooded lids. The color in her face was gone, leaving a sickening ash grey behind. He could feel her blood soaking into his pants and shirt.

"DON'T YOU DARE DIE! YOU HEAR ME! OPEN YOUR EYES RIGHT NOW!" His voice cracked as the fear of losing her became all too real. He had just gotten her back, and was in no damn hurry to lose her again.

"MAJESTY!?" Roland cried out from the blue bubble "MAJESTY WAKE UP!"

Robin felt the dizziness swirl in his brain once more, the gash in his side beginning to take it's toll as the spots invaded his vision. He hauled Regina into his arms, tilting her chin up. "Regina, please. You need to wake up. I can't carry you back, we will both bleed out and Roland …."

The mention of the boys name seemed to momentarily snap Regina from her impending death. Her lung barely pulled in any oxygen as her hazed over eyes found Roland, her heart quelling over the fact he was still safe.

"REGINA! PLEASE!" Robin was beginning to falter, slumping down into the grass beside her as Roland's tears rang through the meadow. The last thing his eyes saw was the profile of her, whiskey colored eyes staring into the sky, and his toddle just beyond, locked into her safety bubble of magic. His heart started to lull, the blood loss becoming too much to fight back, he swore he felt Regina's hand grip two of his fingers, and then there was nothing.

..

...

...

He felt nothing but pain, sharp hot liquid pain that refused to let him break into consciousness. The other thing he could feel was softness underneath him and the warmth of a body beside him. In and out, he fell, hearing muffled voices at points, seeing vague figures move about in a blur. He can feel the press of palms on his stomach, the stinging of water over the wound and the ease of a new bandage, how many times that routine had happened though, he wasn't even close to certain.

His brain was muddled, unable to form a coherent thought or sentence beyond basic mumbling. He could hear soft whimpering beside him every now and again, an anguished moan, a gritted groan. But the voice he couldn't match, at least not now through the fog that riddled his mind

Days rose and Days fell, and finally Robin was beginning to get a bearing on his surroundings. He was definitely in a bed, which means he was alive…but it all crashed then. Where was Roland and where was Regina? Were they alright, did they survive. He could remember nothing after passing out into field. He winced as his abdomen contracted at his movement. It was dark, his eyes not needed to adjust as the slowly cracked open. Above was heavy silk drapery, a fire crackled somewhere further off, and the fresh smell of air from open balcony doors flowed into his space.

He needed to find Roland, and Regina. His heart beginning to hammer painfully in his bruised and battered chest. He groaned hard as a shot of pain rocketed up his spine at the smallest shift. He wasn't going anywhere, that much he could understand.

"Papa?"

The tears hit his eyes at the whisper of the most precious voice in his entire world. He found two scared eyes staring back at him from the side, unruly curls falling into the chubby face of his son.

"Roland" his voice harsh and dry though he still managed to smile.

The toddler crashed into his chest, Robin needing to stifle the groan that threatened to part at the sudden weight on his body. He hugged his boy, tight as ever, thanking the Gods that he was alright….no….his mind stopped him mid prayer, he should be thanking Regina, she had saved his son, again.

"Roland, where's Regina?" he croaked.

Rowland shoved off his father, frowning heavily and Robin's heart sank. It couldn't be, he would have felt her gone, he knows it deep in his soul he would have known if she wasn't here, the ache would have been to deep set.

"She's sleeping" Roland's soft whisper finally broke through Robin's sudden tormenting panic. He exhaled a heavy breath as his son shifted out of the way, revealing her quiet form, laying on her stomach, face buried into the pillow. The tears fell from his eyes as he saw her lung shakily inhale a small breath, and then he saw the bandages. Thick and red, needing to be changed, laid over the entire expanse of her back, curling around a shoulder and disappearing somewhere around her chest. Her calves were wrapped up as well, another bandage on her left thigh. He could see the sweat on her brow, the rouge of her skin and his heart split into pieces at the pained clenching of her face, tight in anguish, barely breathing through her sleeping state.

He wanted to move, to touch her somehow, hear her voice, see her eyes, something to let him know that she was there, was fighting, was still beside him. But he couldn't move the heavy gash in his side rendering him nearly immobile. Roland tucked down into Regina's side, careful not to touch her back, instead finding a long lock of hair and curling it gently into his fist, his other hand linking his fingers into her palm.

"Roland?"

"Yes papa?"

Robin swallowed hard, as the flurry of white electric pain began to overtake him once more.

"Me too?"

Roland squinted in confusion at his father before understanding with a happy sleepy smile. His hand moved as slow as he could withstand, trembling as Roland slowly tugged his and Regina's to meet Robins. He felt her warm skin, limp in Roland's hand, but there was life beating at her pulse point. Robin wrapped his fingers over their intertwined hands, praying through the darkness of exhaustion that she would still be there come morning. He needed to see her smile once more time, hear her breathless laugh, drown in the heat of her beautiful eyes.

His heart pulsed at the clarity, he simply needed her, but first she needed to survive, living without her was no longer an option.

Was it truly ever?


	10. Chapter 10

She felt nothing but pain, her entire body was riddled with it, white hot scorching pain. Thankfully though pain meant she wasn't dead, a small relief in her throbbing head. She groaned, feeling the mattress underneath her, at least it was soft and comforting. A warmth beside her curled in closer, a small grip on her hand made her eyes crack open in confusion. It was dark in the room, her room she figured, a dying fire in the corner flickered, it's last remnants of heat coating the room.

Looking down, her heart clenched. A mop of unruly brown curls was tucked into her side, breathing deeply, the dimples residing in his peaceful sleep. He was okay, he survived. A tear escaped her eyes as she felt his hand grip onto her thumb tugging her palm into his chest. When the beasts attacked it was a blur. She remembered landed on the ground, curling over Roland as the monkeys tore at her back. She wasn't even certain if her magic worked, her mind screaming at her to fight back, but if she turned, they surely would have gone after the boy. The feeling of their claws tearing into her skin scorched her, their teeth burying into the her shoulders.

It was getting hazy, as the blood spilled from her body, black dots invading her vision as she covered the terrified child. She didn't hear Robin screaming for her, but the sudden weight on top was relinquished but she couldn't find the energy to move, the agony was to much to even think of moving a muscle. She could feel herself fading, she was dying. She felt his hands grip her shoulders, turning her over, his voice was a haze as her heart began to fail. The last thing she can remember was the flickering of blue light beside her…maybe her magic had worked, at least she could die knowing that Roland may have survived.

She felt Roland stir, nuzzling closer into her body, he was here and he was safe. A groan pulled her eyes up and her heart stalled. He was laying on his back, forehead frowning as bead of sweat beading along the tousled sandy brown hair. His breaths were shaky, barely there. They made it…how she wasn't sure, but for now that didn't matter. His chest was bare as her eyes moved down, thick and toned, she couldn't help but notice the white scars that contrasted against his golden tanned skin. He grimaced again, his hand moving up to his lower abdomen in subconsciousness. Her lungs froze as she saw the large bandage, reaching from his lower hip up to the middle of his stomach. She could see the red underneath, the wound had to be deep for it to still be bleeding.

He was in pain, every breath he took must be sending agony through his veins, she could see it from the etching in his face. She winced as her palm moved towards him, the sharp stabs of pain in her back firing through her. Black spots invaded her vision as the pain began to take over, but she had to heal him, even just a little, something to ease his agony. Her fingertips buzzed with that old electric feeling from so long ago when her made contact with his ribs. He was hot, a furnace under her hand, and the fear of infection suddenly plagued her. This wasn't storybrooke where they could simply take antibiotics and be alright, infection in the Enchanted Forest was deadly. She focused on him, letting her magic tingle and glow from her palm. It was exhausting already, and her mind was losing consciousness. She could feel her magic working through, the blood was evaporating, his muscle stitching back together slowly. He groaned beneath her, his lungs filling with a much needed deep breath as his skin pulled back together. She fell into sleep before it was finished, her body relinquishing once more into a restless pain riddled sleep. But at least it was something.

..

...

...

Hours later his eyes opened, the sun beaming into the room. Surprisingly he felt nearly no pain, surely his wound wouldn't have healed that quickly. His lowered his gaze, lifting his palm from the bandage, slowly he pulled it back, shocked to see the hot pink skin underneath, not gaping and oozing as it was yesterday but stitched back together, only a scar remaining. He was sore that was still true, but it was a tenth of the pain he had been enduring over the past few days. He could feel a warm tingle on his other side, below his ribs, a faint warming buzz and instinctively he knew the source. Turning slightly, he found her fingers, barely brushing his skin but there none the less. She must have healed him, how she managed to he wasn't sure, and he was certain she shouldn't have used her energy to heal him, she needed to save it all for herself. He frowned at her stubborn nature, but at least it meant she had woken up at some point, though he was loathed it wasn't when he was awake to see her eyes.

His heart warmed as his eyes drifted over Roland's sleeping body, tucked gently into her side, his tiny fingers gripping a long tendril of her hair as he snored lightly. He gazed over her face, and his heart clenched. She looked worse than yesterday, the parlor of her skin an ash gray, her lips forgone their usual ruby color. He could see the sweat on the clung to her skin, the shaky slight inhales that wracked her small torso. Sitting up slightly, he looked over her body, the bandages soaked in red and yellow pus, needing desperately to be changed. He was torn between fearing for her and relief that she was at least breathing beside him.

The door cracked open, revealing a tired looking Granny. Her frown lines were deep as she moved to the side of the bed beside the Queen, shaking her head at the bandages that covered her body. Robin sat up, murmuring a good morning to the older woman, who reciprocated quietly, not wanting to disturb either of the two sleeping parties.

He sat like a statue, fixated on the movements of Granny's hands as they peeled back the gauze, his stomach rolling as the torn flesh came into view. _God she must be in so much pain right now,_ his mind tormented him as he heard a pain filled whimper escape her lips. With her entire back exposed, Granny settled to work, wiping away the dried cracked blood around the wounds, slowly clearing the gouges, leaving small trailing blood lines to run down her skin.

Robin moved to grip her hand as another groan parted, Granny tutting to herself over the Queen's state. He couldn't read her eyes, the gray was steel, fighting between was almost what looked like fear and anger. There was a strange relationship she and Regina had, and he had one with the older woman himself. She was the one who lead her to Regina in the beginning, had been his confidant throughout the five years he had snuck into the castle. Why she was helping him he did not know, and he never had the chance to really say thank you for everything she had done for them, and in the end for him. The last memory he has of Granny was when she urged him to flee, the day he was forced to run away from the woman he had fallen so deeply in love with.

They never spoke of their history, but she would always smile at him, give him a knowing look whenever they passed by the other.

"Unwrap her legs for me" Granny uttered out, motion down. Robin moved gently, ghosting over the bandages on her calves, slowly unrolling, revealing smaller wounds, thankfully these seemed to be healing much better than those on her back. He undid the wrapping on her thigh, grimacing at the long gash down her olive cream skin.

A bowl of green gel was passed to him… "Here this will help". He coated his fingers in the mixture, gently blobbing it onto the wounds. Her hiss pulled his eyes back to her clenched expression, his other hand moved to rub small circles on her free skin, hoping to soothe. It seemed to work as the tension in her body released, her head sinking back down into the pillow further. Clean bandaged were given to him and he slowly re-wrapped the injuries, covering them once more, hoping desperately that this would provide her some sort of relief.

"She healed me" He whispered out. "Last night, I don't remember her doing it, but…" he lifted his shirt, revealing the healed skin and pink thick scar underneath.

Granny frowned heavy "She's always been stubborn in taking care of herself"

Robin nodded with a groaning chuckle. A moment of silence passed as Granny tucked back the fallen hair behind her ears, pressing a cold cloth to her forehead, wiping away some of the sweat from her forehead. "She needs rest"

He sighed, subconsciously trailing his fingers along the smoothness of her cheek, feeling that warming electricity under his hand. For so long he wished to have that sensation again, years he wondered where she was, what she was doing, if she ever thought of him.

Roland stirred beside him, mumbling as he rubbed out his tired eyes. "Papa?"

"Hi my boy" he smiled, pushing the curls from Roland's eyes.

The toddler's tummy growled.

"We should get you some breakfast son"

Roland turned to his Majesty, cupping her cheek gently "His Majesty okay?'

Robin sighed heavily, "She will be. She just needs some rest"

He tugged the little boy away, but not before his heart swelled as Roland pressed a wet kiss to her forehead with a tiny whisper "Get better Majesty".

They left the Queen in peace.

..

...

...

Hours later, Robin couldn't let go of this feeling in his heart, it was confusing, plaguing him with every moment. He couldn't shake it, there was still residual anger that bubbled inside him, but now there was something else, something he hadn't let free for years.

He walked through the courtyard, trying to clear his mind of things he couldn't exactly figure out.

"Well, you look exhausted" a voice floated through his silence.

He turned, smiling as Rosette came into view, her red glow emitting around her. Robin sighed "It's been quite the week" he chuckled sadly.

'So I've heard. How are you feeling?" Rosetta sat down on the bench, patting the space beside her. He sat down heavily, a pain ridding sigh escaping him.

The fairy studied his face for a moment, his eyes looking far into the distance as he grimaced.

"You are thinking about the Queen aren't you?"

"I am always thinking about her" the words fell before he could reel them in. A flush broke out across his skin.

The fairy smiled, bumping his shoulder "It's okay you know"

"Is it? There is so much I can't explain when I look at her…"

A silence fell between them as Robin stared off into the setting sun. His heart beat every moment for her, torn between his anger and a deep rooted long lost ache for her.

"Tell me what's on your mind" Rosetta grasped his forearm, squeezing gently as she waited for him to speak.

He exhaled heavily "I just…. She cursed me to a life alone"

"Did she?'

"Yes!" he glowered "She made me a wanted criminal, forced me to be on the run for my entire life, forced me to live without her"

Rosetta hummed, "Were you truly alone though?"

Robin snorted "Of course I was"

"How so? You found your men, your wife, you have a son….how is that alone?"

He frowned at her statement, not really knowing how to reply.

"I suppose you are right…. But it's just ….."

"It wasn't the same without her"

His heart faltered, as his eyes closed heavy "No, it wasn't"

"Do you wish to forgive her?"

"Yes" He was shocked at his own words, the truth behind them.

"Can I ask you something?" The fairy questioned, to which Robin nodded.

She nuzzled into the man a touch closer, "You feel like she cursed you to be alone right?"

He nodded.

"How do you think she felt?"

Robin frowned, turning his eyes to the fairy in confusion.

"She may have sent you away, but why would she do that? She gave you a chance, a life to have a family, to love again…did she get the same thing?"

He didn't know what to say…she got to live a life as a Queen, wanted for nothing, everything given to her on a silver plate.

"Didn't she?" he scoffed.

"Think about it…" she prodded him "Regina sent you away for your safety, she saved your life And while heartbreak may be hard to get over, at least you had a life to live with, what did she gain from letting you go?"

"She was a Queen"

"Yes a Queen, trapped in her own castle. You know that" Rosette bumped his shoulder

"Better a Queen than an Outlaw" he retorted.

"Is that so? Like I said, at least you got a chance at having a family and people who love you. Regina was stuck here, in a prison, forced to obey the wishes of a man who didn't love her, to play mother to a girl who ruined her life. She had no one Robin. How alone she must have felt. A Queen of nothing but loneliness. If you think you are the only one who lived with heartbreak you are seriously idiotic"

Clarity ripped through his mind at the red fairies words. After everything that had happened could it have possible been so easy? Regina had said those words to him not a month prior, her heartbreak…heartbreak meant that she loved him…but if she did then why send him away?

His thoughts seemed to be read all too easy by the fairy who chuckled "People always do crazy things when they are in love….she wanted to give you a chance Robin, a chance the two of you couldn't have had…Freedom to love"

Was he ever truly free of her though? He loved Marian, that was not a doubt, but then again, he knew that with every morning his heart cracked a little further without Regina beside him. No matter the love he had for Marian….there was still a hole in his heart, one that could only be filled by a certain brunette.

"I need you to do something for me" He stammered out.

"Anything to help heal a broken heart" She smiled.

They walked slowly to Regina's room, Robin cracking the door open quietly, hoping that the woman beyond the oak door was still sleeping. It was quiet inside as they stepped through, and for that he was thankful.

He moved to the side of the bed where she slept, gently parting back the sheets, his heart clenching at Rosetta's gasp.

"Can you heal her?" He whispered out, tugging lightly back a strand of hair that had fallen into Regina face. She looked beautiful, even know as she battled.

Rosetta moved to the side, her eyes coasting over the wounds on the Queen.

"I can ease her pain, possibly take away some of the scars, but I can't heal everything, she will still live with a few scars…" She whispered out heavily

Robin nodded, sitting down beside Regina, linking his hand into hers, reveling in that warm tingle that immediately graced his skin. "Whatever you can do will be something. More than I can at least"

"I'm not so sure about that…."

He frowned at the fairy.

"Scars on the body are easier to heal than those of the heart" She commented with a knowing look.

He didn't know what to say, his eyes simple faltered from the fairies gaze, finding Regina's sleeping expression again. They needed to talk, and he hoped they would find the moment for it.

Rosetta's magic glowed from her palm, a light gold with red sparkles as her hand moved across the Queen's body. He could see it, the tension in her relax with each passing motion. The red blood of the bandages slowly vanishing. He waited till she was finished, before his fingers pried back the gauze, revealing thankfully smooth clear skin, void of any damaging wounds, save for one long deep gash that curled from her shoulder blade down across her ribs.

"Can you not heal that?" He stuttered.

Rosette shook her head sadly "Unfortunately, this is all I can do for her. Some scars are destined to live on the skin"

He frowned down at the pink skin, another memory that she would have to live with.

"Thank you" He smiled, one that not quite reached his eyes

Rosette patted his arm before smiling "I'll see you soon okay" and with that her red light glowed around her, vanishing her form beside him in a moment. He sat quietly for a few minutes, letting the fairies' words echo in his head. Was it really that simple? That Regina loved him enough to let him go. The evidence seemed to play in that favor he had to admit. She had saved him from being executed by the King, saved him at the whipping post, saved Marian from the black guards….why do all of that if she didn't love him?

If what Rosette said was true there was one other person he needed to talk to. Someone who could cement everything that had been said.

..

...

...

He stormed through the castle, his heart in a frying to figure out what was already known in his soul. Pushing the doors open to the council room he found her, sitting beside her husband, chatting animatedly as she rubbed her stomach.

"Princess, may I speak with you?" he stammered out.

Snow's eyes went wide at his panicked state. "Of course" she nodded, standing to move with him into another room. Robin walked back and forth, trying to figure out his thoughts, to make a coherent statement, desperate to not come out as a jumbled mess.

"Robin what's wrong? Is it Regina, is she alright?" She questioned.

If she only knew….

He turned, eyes finding the green hazel of the princess, "I need to ask you something, and I need you to promise me to tell the truth"

Snow recoiled a step, the heaviness in Robin's voice freezing her heart as she nodded.

"Can you tell me about Regina….I mean what she was like before your father died…."

He knew the first 5 years but it was the last 15 he didn't understand and desperately needed to know. He watched as Snow's face fell, a sadness in her eyes as she sighed.

"In the beginning I thought she was happy, at least in moments she seemed that way. But there was always this aura of depression around her, like she didn't want to be here"

Robin scoffed internally, if this damn princess only knew….

"But something changed, maybe 4 or 5 years in…."

His heart stammered.

"I don't know what happened, but something shifted inside her. Whether it was the pain of losing Daniel that came full front, I don't know. But Regina became reclusive, she barely spoke, never smiled, rarely showed her face in public…"

Robin ached, deep and painful for her….that was the point he had left…

"I tried, but then my father died and everything changed" Snow continued sadly "She has gone through so much pain and loss, I can't deny I didn't contribute to it, but a part of me always hoped she would have been the mother I had lost…but after the King died, well you know the rest"

He swallowed heavily…she had crumbled after he left, the princess's' words rang true to what the fairy had just said…she was alone, without love, without a family, without him…

"You know, I feel as though I remember you…when I was younger, your face seems oddly familiar to me" Snow arched a high eyebrow.

He couldn't tell her the truth, Regina had asked him to keep their relationship a secret. So Robin simply shook his head "I can't recall us ever meeting your highness".

Snow looked at him with a wondering expression, trying to place him in her mind, a sentiment to which Robin hoped she wouldn't succeed.

"Look, I know you and Regina have some sort of relationship, and while I may not understand it, she has become my family, and I need to know that you will keep her safe. She doesn't deserve anymore heartbreak in her life…she has endured enough" The princess dead panned, sending a heavy stare into Robin's eyes.

He nodded his head, stammering out "I promise that I have no intention of hurting her"

The woman frowned, trying to figure out his angle with the Queen, but something in his eyes spoke to her, a look that she knew all too well….love. Snow smiled, reaching out to squeeze Robin's hands in a simple gesture "Then I wish you luck. Is she doing alright?"

He sighed, "I think after a few days she will be well enough to heal herself"

"She healed you….didn't she?"

He stalled before smiling shyly "Yes, the Queen is quite stubborn. She wishes to take care of others before herself"

"She always has.." Snow commented ominously. A sentiment to which Robin decided he would look into later, but for now he needed to get back to her, there was something he had to do, something long overdue between the both of them.

He bid the princess good night and darted through the corridors, his heart set on one goal. He turned the corner, facing the thick oak door he'd seen so many times before, all that he needed was to open it and show her what had been hidden in his heart for too long.

..

...

...

Regina grimaced, whimpering slightly as she shuffled on the bed. The pain seemingly to have floated away, save for the soreness, the hot white pain was gone. Groaning, she lifted herself up, letting her magic float in her veins, trying to find the wounds that had plagued her for days. She was shocked to find the skin healed, the muscles stitched back together. Who had the magic to do that, to heal her? Frowning she pushed herself up gently, through her wounds may be gone, she still felt the low residing bruising in her body.

"You're awake, Good. You need to eat something" Granny's voice echoed around her as she moved to sit against the bed.

"How?"

"Don't ask me. When I left you this morning you were looking like road kill" The older woman scoffed in astonishment.

Regina coughed, her voice dry like a desert as she sat gingerly against the soft pillows. Someone had healed her, but who?

"I'm glad to see you awake and moving Regina. There was a few days where I didn't know if I would see your eyes open again" the older woman sighed. Regina said nothing, not truly knowing what to say to the pain in Granny's eyes. They had history, lord knows they did, but after the curse was cast, their relationship had become somewhat strained. While they were never out right rude to the other, Regina knew that Granny wasn't pleased being cursed in storybrooke.

She watched silently as Granny got up, moving to the bathroom, with a mumble of getting her some water. Her bed seemed cold without Roland and Robin beside her. The warmth they gave was palpable in its absence.

Her mind floated back to them, the feeling of Roland cuddled into her body, Robin sleeping while restlessly, at least he was safe beside her. The fact he was gone, meant she had healed him, enough that he was well to move, and for that she was thankful. But now what? Her heart stumbled as his blue eyes invaded her mind. They had so much to deal with, and so much unsaid, so much she needed to say but didn't know how.

Where they were she didn't know, there were moments when she could feel something long forgotten, a look in his eyes that melted her heart, his crooked smile that never ceased to freeze her breath. After everything they had been through, could he still feel the way she was feeling now? That confusing, frightening sensation in her heart.

She fumbled with the hem of her black nightgown, pulling at the lace on her thighs. The door pushed open and her eyes found ocean blue. She froze at the emotions running through them. He smiled at her, moving silently towards the bed, his gaze never faltering once with each step. Her heart fluttered as he closed the distance, time seemingly to stand still as she drowned in his eyes. She knew in her heart what she felt, it was true, and from the look in his eyes, there was reciprocation. She inhaled sharply as he sat down on the bed, lacing her fingers into his own, the tingling warmth spreading through her body.

He said nothing, just looking at her. She was beautiful, that was the end all be all. He could see the curiosity in her eyes, the hesitating wondering that swirled within the whiskey brown that he knew he could gaze into for the rest of his life. His heart knew, his soul knew, and now his mind knew.

Without words, he leaned into her, a hand carding through her hair as he gently tugged her forward. She was his home, she always had been, always will be, and when his lips melded against hers, every doubt that every prodded him melted away.

He felt her sigh in the kiss, her hand carefully moving to his face, her palm settling against his cheek. He kissed her with everything he knew to be true, his heart, and soul loved her, since the moment he saw her.

He parted from her lips, resting his forehead to hers, breathing in her honey warm aroma.

"Thank You" he mumbled against her mouth.

Her eyebrows creased at his sentiment as her hands lightly carded through his hair.

"For saving me, the first time"

Her heart glowed as he smiled at her, they were here, after everything at it was true.

"I'd save you a thousand times again"

Robin smiled, beaming down at the woman who had stolen his heart, though it was gladly given. He leaned in, once more to capture the lips he had dreamed about, the reality so much better than he remembered.

They may have a tortured past, but what mattered was their future, and while unspoken between languid kisses, in their hearts and more deeply, in their souls they both knew, this is what they were meant to find.

Each other, again.


	11. Chapter 11

It felt like time had stopped, and was allowing them this moment, to just be together, finally after all the tortured years and broken hearts. Regina sighed into his mouth, unwilling to let go, and apparently either was Robin as his arm circled around her waist, the other carding through her hair as he tugged her a fraction closer. Her hand brushes over the stubble on his jaw line, as she clutches his shirt, soaking in every little detail she can from this moment.

 _Finally, finally_ – that's the only thing Robin can think as he continues to kiss the one woman who has reigned over his heart since the day he saw her by the lake. Years over years he loved her, from a distance, always waiting and wondering if some day, they would end up like they are now, barely able to contain their smiles as their lips mould to one another.

She can feel his heart beating below her shifted palm, heavy and strong, in tune with her own. He has a good heart, a pure heart, free from darkness unlike her own, not tainted by the evil that lurks. She hesitates, fractionally for a second, thinking about how this could be so so wrong, that he shouldn't love her like this, she doesn't deserve it, doesn't deserve him after the life she has lead.

"What's wrong?" Robin mumbles against her mouth before pulling back slightly to find her eyes, shining with a mixture of emotions. Emotions he understands far too well. She holds his blue eyes for a moment, before feeling suddenly ashamed of herself, ashamed for the fact she's wants to love him, wants to have his love in return…but the once Evil Queen doesn't deserve love, not after everything she had done. When her gaze drops from his, his heart clenches in his chest. She looks defeated, chewing on her lower lip, picking at the skin on her nails. It was a nervous habit of hers he knew from years ago, he would come into her room to find her fingers bleeding slightly.

The memory ached Robin, all her life she has been nervous, and he ventures silently to himself that even as the _Evil_ Queen, it was probably the same way. Wanting for love and acceptance only to have it ripped away time and time again. But not now, not today when he has just gotten her back. No, he would prove she could have love, deserve love.

Reaching out gently, he tilted her chin up with two fingers, bowing his head a touch lower to find her eyes again. He felt her lean slightly into his palm that moved to cup her cheek as she closed her eyes, sighing heavily into the little bit of space in between them. Robin saw her thinking, could hear the thoughts running through her mind, he could read her like a book, knew exactly what she was about to say as her gaze flickered open, her ruby lips parting slightly, the thick swallow before licking her lips, readying herself to say something. He smirked internally, his heart glowing at the fact even now, he knew her.

"Robin, I—"

 _Nope, not going to happen_ – he chuckled to himself before crashing his lips to hers once more, inhaling the tight moan that escaped her. She is home for him, and he has no intention of moving, ever again. So he kisses her, refusing to relinquish his tender hold on her body, absolutely unwilling for even a second for her to think she is not worth this. He cemented himself to the fact that right now, he was going to kiss her until he couldn't breathe anymore, and then he'd kiss her again, and again and again. Moving every doubt from her mind.

Well that's at least what he intended to do until a gruff "Ahem", echoed into the bed chambers. He split off from Regina's lips, turning in time with her to find a very stern looking Milly Lucas staring back at them, arms crossed over her chest, one eyebrow cocked up high over the rim of her glasses.

"Looks like my glass of water isn't needed, what with all the saliva trading going on" She huffed, unable to contain the slight smirk pulling across her lips. Internally she was blooming, her heart pumping so furiously in her chest it threatened to explode. How long has it been since she had seen Regina smile like this. How long has it been since she saw the blush rise on Robin's neck as he chuckled into Regina's hair. All those decades ago, she watched as two halves of one whole fought desperately to stay together, finding some semblance of happiness in a dark world, only for it all to crash and burn. She had never heard from Robin since that day, never knew if he was alright or not, what had happened to him. But what she did see was the Queen, the shell she had become, the light that left her eyes and the smile that faded into a blank expression, one that before Granny left the castle to take care of Ruby had watched slowly morph into something darker, something deadlier.

But not a day had gone by, Enchanted Forest or Storybrooke that Granny wondered if she would ever see that girl again, the one that was smiling with bright eyes and a blush on her face.

"Well when the two of you are finished here, dinner is ready" the older woman gruffed out, turning to the doorway.

"Granny…" Regina's voice stopping the older woman. She turned, seeing the sudden uncertainty in the whiskey gaze of the Queen. Raising her hand she finally smiled "I won't say a thing, I promise".

"Thank You" Regina breathed out.

"And you!" Granny turned to give Robin a pointed look "She needs to eat and rest, no funny business until you both are 100%, got it!?"

Robin chuckled, nodding his head "You have my word, I will be nothing but a gentleman"

Granny _hmm's_ with a roll of her eyes and walked from the room, shutting the door tightly on the two adults behind who waited a beat before breaking out laughing at just being caught like teenagers. Regina fell back into the bed, choking on her breath, Robin following, slumping forward into the pillows beside her, chuckling heartedly.

..

...

Propping himself on a elbow, he leaned over Regina, anchoring one arm across her torso. He watched her breath still, cheeks flushed red, sparkling sweetly up at him, but still a hint of hesitation swirled behind them. Brushing back a long curl of hair, Robin smiled softly.

"Do you really forgive me?" Regina whispered out, tense and uncertain.

"Come with me" He stood up from the bed, interlacing their fingers as she arched a questioning eyebrow, but followed none the less. Robin lead them to the balcony, breathing in the fresh cool air of night. He felt Regina shiver beside him, in her thin black gown, providing no breaker to the light cold wind. He moved so she was situated in front of him, her hips gently pressing against the black guard rail as his arms wrapped around her, hugging her tight into his chest.

She hadn't felt this feeling in a long time, not since Daniel, not since she had sent Robin away, this warming sensation building in her stomach, warming her from the inside out. Leaning back, her head turned slightly to rest into the crook of his neck, breathing in the sweet oak and spice scent that clung to his skin. She smiled, hummed absently as Robin pressed a kiss into her temple.

"I forgave you years ago" he murmured into her ear "even through the confusion and anger I held, I forgave you"

Tear prickled her eyes as she listened to his words.

"Thank You" she barely managed to whisper back before turning in his arms, wrapping her arms around his torso tightly, his arms mimicking her own as he held her into him. They stood together, simply just together.

Her stomach grumbled in the silence, and Robin chuckled "Let's go get you some dinner, shall we?" He smiled, kissing her gently once more, before heading towards the door.

Regina froze, as he reached for the knob, her hand still laced into his.

"Regina? What's wrong?" he frowned back.

Everyone she loves is taken from her. Loving her makes them a target. It made Daniel one, Henry one, and now Robin and Roland. If people knew, they would take them away. She trembled slightly as Robin stepped back into her space, his blue eyes searching over her sudden terrified expression. He should have known. His heart sank as he reached his other hand up to cup her cheek, kissing her forehead before smiling.

"This is just us Regina. No one else needs to know until you are ready. I promise you"

The tear slipped before she could blink it away and his thumb caught it, smoothing the wetness away.

"I don't deserve you" She sniffed, leaning into his palm.

"That's where you are wrong Regina" Robin's tone stern but undercoated with love.

She stared into his eyes as he continued gently "You deserve everything that people have never given you"

Regina smiled stiffly "and what's that?"

"Love"

Her heart thundered in her chest, the simplest, sweetest look in his eyes melting her to the core.

"Come on, let's eat. I'm starving"

Robin turned, releasing her hand and she suddenly felt cold without him.

The door opened

"Wait!"

He turned, only to have his lips being crashed by her own, passionate and smooth in their movements. She tasted like cherries and wine, and he was getting drunk of her.

Regina parted slightly breathless with a dazzling smile.

..

...

...

Three weeks had passed, three beautiful blissful and secretive weeks in which Regina was reveling in. Small moments where she'd catch Robin's eyes staring at her from across the hall, the gently quick passes of his hand over the small of her back. She adored silently the rolling of his eyes to the insufferable Charmings, the quick sharp sarcastic retorts he'd whisper out to her when no one was looking. Their nights were spent wrapped in each other, snuggled together under the heavy blankets as they kissed till dawn broke.

He was becoming her entire world, Robin and his little boy. She loved Roland, to the point of pain. His dimpled smiles, unabashed affection he peppered her with, the way his tiny arms would cling to her as he fell asleep against her chest, slipping away into dreamland to the beating of her heart.

There were still moments when it was overwhelming, not having Henry. His loss a dark cloud that followed her everywhere. She cried alone, clinging to her abdomen, hoping to stifle the agony away. How was she supposed to move on when a piece of her heart wasn't there, lost to her forever, unable to complete the puzzle of her soul. Robin did his best, letting her have the needed moments alone before he would sit down beside her on the balcony, letting her last few tears drip onto his tunic. He couldn't imagine being separated from Roland. He saw the distant look in her eyes when Snow would talk about Emma and he desperately wished he could take her pain away.

It was in those moments now he especially had a strong distaste for the Prince and Princess, completely unaware of the impact their words were taking on his love.

"Henry would have loved it here! All the adventure and magic" Snow bubbled out "I could have seen him riding horses, learning to fight with a sword, becoming a true knight like he was destined to be"

Regina frowned at that "destined to be a knight?"

Snow arched an eyebrow back incredulously "Well of course. Emma is a princess, it's only natural that Henry would have learned to be royalty here as well"

"I would never have wanted that for him" Regina scoffed back, staring off into the distance.

"Why?"

"I have higher hope for him than to rule a Kingdom" The Queen commented back coldly.

"My father would have taught him how to be kind and just" Snow retorted.

Robin curled his hands into his pants, his blood boiling at the mention of that wretched man. He watched Regina tense in her chair, and so wished he could be sitting beside her, reach out to grab her hand, let her know she wasn't alone, he was here.

"Yes, and probably would have taught Henry how to run a kingdom straight into the ground" Regina huffed back.

David scowled, grabbing Snow's hand as she recoiled at Regina's words. "Leopold was a fantastic king, Regina. Just because you didn't like him, doesn't give you the right to tear him down…especially when he isn't here to defend himself" The last words dripped from the Prince's mouth with disdain.

 _Breathe Robin….breathe….don't say something you will regret later_ ….. His mind raging as he sent daggers at David who had leaned back in triumph at Regina's lack for words.

"I agree with Regina, truthfully"

The statement came from an unexpected source, none other than Granny who had sat silent as a statue at the table.

"What!? How can you say that?" Snow screeched.

The older woman, put down her knitting and dead panned the princess "It's hard to notice the despair in your people when you are the Princess who gets everything she asks for"

Regina nearly smiled, nearly. As Granny continued "Now I have lived through both your father's reign and Regina's. And while I do not agree with many of the things the Queen has done, as a town's member, this Kingdom did nothing but prosper under her guidance"

David's jaw dropped as he stared back at the older woman "That's not true! She was a tyrant, hell bent on revenge because of a secret a ten year old told. She ruined lives!"

"I'm not saying she didn't. But she also set in place programs for the poor to regain new jobs, build lives for their own families, pull themselves out of poverty. She staved off the attack from King Jonathan, lead the defence for nearly a year"

Regina's eyebrow arched at Granny, stunned that she was actually being defending. It was no secret how she ruled. It may have been ruthless, but she never let her people suffer when they had done nothing except aid Snow White. She took care of them, built ties and allies with other domains, rebuilt the Enchanted Forest into a competitor against others, grew the finances beyond what Leopold ever could have dreamed.

Silence echoed in the room as the group remained shocked.

"And I knew the King, not as the man who was your father, but the man who took a 17 year old girl as his bride, there is no justice in that"

"He made Regina a Queen. You think she would have been thankful, and not killed him in his sleep" David sniped back.

Robin couldn't hold back any longer, his anger making his hands tremble where they clutched his trousers.

"You honestly have Regina to thank for the two of you being together" He commented deadly.

"Yes, by all means. Thank you Regina for tearing Snow and I apart more times that I can count, how gracious of you"

Regina stared at Robin, barely hearing the jab the Prince leveled at her. Why would he say that…why was he defending her….

Robin bit down on his lower lip hard, before retorting back hotly "Tell me Charming, Do you truly think the King would have let his only heir to his throne marry a shepherd and not a Prince in some far off realm?"

"My father believed in love" Snow snapped back.

"No he didn't" Regina finally broke. "If he did, I never would have been stuck in this hell hole in the first place. He knew I didn't love him, and he did not love me"

"Because you never gave him a chance!" Snow screeched back.

She didn't want to have this conversation, not now and not ever with Snow, but this naive little girl needed to learn the place, needed to understand just what her actions of getting Daniel killed had cost Regina.

"You're right. Though I found it hard when he would grunt his dead wife's name out while he took advantage of me, night after night. Maybe I found it hard to love the man that beat me behind closed doors and then paraded me around like a trophy whilst my dresses hid the bite marks, the bruises, the scars he had placed on my body"

"My father never would have done that" Snow seethed.

Tense silence fell around the group, Regina's eyes brimming with angry tears as she clenched her fists so tight her nails bit into the skin of her palms. Robin's eyes lingered on her, seeing the rage and pain cementing into her body. This was going to do her no good, being around the Charmings when they wouldn't even listen, naive and unwavering in their opinions.

"There are things you don't know, and things you should never have to find out Snow White. Now you either understand that there are painful memories that roam this castles for some, or you go on about your business, but I make myself clear when I say, I will not stand for either of you dismissing what I know to be the truth" Granny harped out grimly. "Now if you will excuse me, I need to go prepare dinner". The older woman stood with a huff, her chair screeching along the concrete floor as she stomped from view.

"Regina, Roland wanted to see if you would like to join myself and the merry men for dinner tonight by the lake" Robin smiled, though his anger was rushing through him.

She said nothing, merely nodded and stood from the table, holding her head high in all her dignity though her eyes betrayed her.

"Enjoy your evening" Robin gritted out to the last two people, before following Regina out the main doors. He caught up beside her, unknowing what she wanted in this moment, so he simply walked alongside her in silence. That is until her hand found his, and her fingers squeezed against his own tightly. He turned, only to see tears falling.

"Regina -"

"Not now okay. Lets just go" She sniffed, brushing away the wet trail on her cheeks.

"Whatever you wish" He whispered, clenching her hand quickly in comfort.

..

...

...

The evening was beautiful, and Regina was beyond thankful to get out of the palace. After the impromptu discussion about her previous life as Queen she wanted nothing more than to never step foot back in those stone walls again.

It was surprising to her just how much she was actually enjoying being around this group of men, who sang boisterously, drank heavily and yammered on about stories she wasn't sure could even be real with the theatrics behind them. More than once she caught herself laughing between sips of ale. It was freeing, just to be like this. Over the past month they had been here, the attitude of the Merry Men towards the Queen had shifted from cold and distasteful to absolutely enamoured with her. It was like having a family, they laughed at her, mainly about the choice of clothing she used to wear, laughed with her when she would grumbled about how uncomfortable corsets and high heels really were. It was peaceful.

Robin's' heart soared as he watched her, sitting on a log, sandwiched between Tuck and Little John as Roland ran around, handing her whatever flower he could find. She had a thick bouquet in her hand right now, chuckling as Roland stuffed another white daisy into the wild mix. This is what he had been missing all those years.

Her.

The sun had set long ago and the Merry Men began to drift off, snoring loudly in their respective tents. Robin sat down beside Regina who was rocking Roland back and forth gently. He kissed her temple, breathing in the rose honey smell of her hair as his arm wrapped around her hips. Yes, this was exactly what he had been waiting for his entire life. They sat together for a while, watching the fire burn out gently, before Robin motioned to grab Roland.

"I can do it" Regina smiled, hugging the tyke closer. Robin watched her walk away to put his son to bed, his heart aching at the sight of them together. Marian had died not two years after Roland was born, and it broke Robins heart knowing his son would grow up without a mother. And yet, in the twisted way of fate that life is, he felt lighter in the fact that his child and his love had attached themselves to each other so effortlessly.

He sat on the log, pushing around the dying embers until he felt Regina's lips press into the back of his shoulders, her arms wrapping around his neck as she nuzzled into this stubbled jaw.

"Shall I escort you home?"

"No, let's just stay here a little while longer"

He smiled, grabbing her hand and leading her to sit beside him.

..

...

The air suddenly went cold, too cold, dropping multiple degrees within a fraction of a second. It wasn't natural, and in the moment Robin sensed it, Regina did as well. Her eyes searching the dark forest for the source. She could feel it, thick and heavy, it's smell of putrid dry gin swarming around them. It wasn't an animal…..that they were both certain of.

Standing slowly, Robin grabbed his bow and arrow, anchoring his weapon as he scanned the absent forest that was hiding this dark presence. Regina stood beside him, a small flickering fire ball in her palm.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you"

A sharp crackling voice broke through the dead quiet. They spun around weapons ready to fire, only to be confronted by a redheaded woman with a devilish smile on her face.

"Who the hell are you?" Regina snarled, roaring her fireball a touch bigger.

"Relax, Regina. I'm not here for you. Not yet anyway"

The two women glared at each other, Regina's blood running hot as she tried to place this stranger she'd swear she had never met in her entire life.

"I won't ask again. Who are you?"

"So many questions, with some very interesting answers" The redheaded witch stepped forward, but her eyes were glued to Robin. She looked angry, controlled rage that bubbled within her eyes as she closed the distance between them.

Robin drew his bow tight "Not another step" his tone dark and sharp.

The woman halted for a second, grinning venomously at him, her bright blue eyes sparkling with something sinister. And that is when Regina noticed…her eyes…they looked oddly familiar.

"I would have expected a nicer welcome from you" The woman snapped dryly at Robin.

"You don't seem the type I would generally welcome anywhere" He barbed back, moving a fraction in front of Regina.

If they weren't facing off with some random witch who apparently knew them, Regina almost would have found it sweet in the fact he was trying to protect her. No one ever protected her.

The redhead began walking again, and Robin fired a warning shot just past her shoulder. "Like I said, do not move". They stared at each other darkly, the cold wind swirling around them like ice. It made Regina shiver, not that she would let it show through her stone walled mask.

"It's a shame really. How you turned out" the witch sneered "and to think I almost had you killed off by my pets before we could meet again. Would have been real downer don't you think"

The way the woman was eyeing up Robin made Regina begin to panic, it was all too similar to how she used to stare at Snow White. A predator circling its prey, waiting to pounce. She let her fire ball go, just landing in front of the woman's feet who screamed as she fell back.

"I don't care who you are, but listen when I say I will destroy you if you take another step without telling us who you are and why you are here" Regina growled.

The witch glared at Regina, as she righted her long black skirt. "It is unnerving isn't it, _Your Majesty_. That I know all about you and him, and yet you haven't the idea who I could be"

Another fireball raged into Regina's palm "You're playing with fire here, literally".

"You're honestly going to tell me you don't remember who I am" The woman turned back to Robin who stood tense with his bow locked to fire once more.

"Not in the slightest" He barked.

"That's a pity" She smirked "Seeings how I am going to take everything from you"

"What have I done to gain such a bid for revenge?"

The woman stepped over the last burning embers of Regina's fire, and before either could react they were frozen to the spot by the woman's magic. She stepped into Regina's face, glowering down at the Queen with malice.

"You are a pretty thing aren't you, Regina" her long bony fingers trailed along Regina's cheek, her sharp nails leaving a red line behind. Robin struggled, trying to break out of the bonds before something could happen to her.

Regina didn't move, only stared back with as much dark hate as she could muster as she smiled "Are you jealous of me?"

The woman laughed bitterly, "Maybe"

It was a burning radiating pain that was sent into her body as the witch flared her magic into Regina's veins. She screamed but no sound came out as she writhed on the spot, falling to her knees.

"STOP! DON'T HURT HER PLEASE!" Robin hollered out.

The witch flicked her wrist with a shrug, leaving Regina to paint on the ground, as she clutched her heart, still frozen by the other womans magic.

"I knew that would get your attention" She grinned at Robin. "You like her don't you, this Queen".

Robin's eyes darted to Regina who trembled on the ground in agony.

"Wait….no. Let me rephrase that"

Regina screamed as another wave of electrocuting pain exploded into her body.

"You love her, don't you" The witch cackled , releasing Regina once more as Robin viciously struggled against the invisible bonds.

The pair stared at each other heatedly, blue eyes matching blue eyes.

"Well maybe this will jog that memory of yours" the redhead lifted up her sleeve, and Robin's heart sank horridly. A long scar, etched like an arrow on her cream skin. He knew that scar, knew it all to well. Nausea ripped through him as his vision blurred.

"See you soon Robbie"

The woman vanished in a cloud of green and black smoke, her magic binds bursting free as she disappeared.

Robin ran to Regina, frantically searching her body for blood as she whimpered.

"Are you alright?"

"I'm fine"

"Regina, are you sure?"

"Yes Robin. I'm okay. Not an overly pleasant feeling but it's fading, I promise"

He hugged her into his chest, his heart racing a mile a minute as she leaned into him for a moment. How was this even possible? How was she here, in this place, she was gone, he thought she'd ran off or died. It had been years upon years since he had seen her…and his memory burned with their past.

"Robin who was that" Regina finally questioned outstanding to her feet with his hand still firmly grasped in her own.

He didn't answer, only stared in disbelief and shock at the spot where she had vanished.

"Robin?...Robin!" Regina tugged his face back to hers, as the unnerving panic began to settle into her heart. "Who was that?"

He gaped at her for a moment, breathing heavily before shaking his head "My sister"


	12. Chapter 12

She doesn't know what to do, how to break him out of the trance state of shock, the gaping stunned expression painted to his face. He just stared at the spot where the woman had just vanished, stared into the disbelief of what had just been uncovered.

"Robin…hey, look at me" Her hands cupping the stubbled cheeks, turning him slowly to face her. Brushing back a lock of sandy blonde hair that had fallen into his eyes, her hands ran to the back of his neck, stroking the wisps of hair at the base. "Talk to me…that's your sister?"

He nodded, flicking his gaze back to that spot, his heart thundering. How was it possible that she was here…

"Robin…"

"Can you take us back to the Castle? I need to speak with Friar Tuck" he swallowed hard, and Regina could feel the battle of fear and uncertainty radiating from him. Linking their hands together, purple smoke swirled, tugging them back within a moment to the dining hall.

He dropped her hand quickly, walking off without another word as he ran his hand over his face, leaving Regina stunned behind him.

"What's going on?" Granny's huffed tone questions beside her, and she simply stares at his fading figure for a moment, shaking her head slightly, eyebrows raised in confusion. "We were kind of attacked in the forest…"

She can hear the sharp inhale of the older woman as she continues "…and it turns out, the witch is Robin's sister".

Wringing her hands, she fiddles with the ring on her hand absently, not really sure what to do, she's never really had to be one to console others – that right was reserved solely for Henry back in Storybrooke. Her heart burns at the thought of her son…he would tell her to be a hero, to go find Robin, to listen to whatever he had to say. Her perfect little prince, always so full of light and hope, a wisdom beyond his years. She misses him terribly, misses the way he would hug her from behind in the mornings with a groggy greeting, or the nights he had climbed into bed without reason, snuggling into her side before falling back into a deep sleep.

"Well, I can imagine that was quite a shock. I had no idea he had a sister" Granny mumbled.

"Either did I"

There was so much she didn't know about him, that was becoming apparent, they were so different, and yet so much the same. Had a past that tied them together, and an unknown future before them. But that in between is what she was terrified of. Feared of her own treacherous misdeeds as the Evil Queen, how she longed for companionship, but still couldn't believe she deserved someone. It ached her that in a moment of uncertainty for him, he turned away from her, went to find another instead. She knew she shouldn't feel that twinge of jealousy towards the Friar, he had known Robin for many more years than Regina did, had become a part of his family when she was absent.

She wanted to be there for him, but it felt like he didn't wish her, didn't want to have her there beside him.

"I'm sure he will come back"

The older woman, giving the Queen a knowing look underneath the small smile. Regina shrugged, not knowing what to say back, opting to say nothing at all. She walked back to her room, sitting out on the balcony with a blanket wrapped around her slight shoulders, breathing in the fresh cold air. Her eyes roamed out to the flickering of a fire, situated between rows of tents, her heart clenching as his small figure came into view. He sat beside the Friar, just to two of them, side by side on a log, Robin leaning heavily towards the flames as the other man spoke words she couldn't hear.

Unable to tear her eyes away from him, she let the night pass, tugging the blanket around her as she leaned into the soft cushions of the chaise.

..

...

...

He was stunned, lost for words as the fire licked his skin. He was torn, angry at himself, and unsure of what to do. Friar Tuck listened to the story of his sister, the magic she spun, the arrow scar on her arm, the underlying threat she directed at both he and Regina.

"What happened to her…you've never spoken of your sister"

Robin sighed heavily, letting his memory take over.

 ** _*Years Ago*_**

 _He sat on the log, listening to the screaming within the household behind him. He didn't really understand why everyone was so angry, she didn't mean to do it. He could hear the hollering, the arguing that seemed to rage on forever. His ten year old self couldn't wrap its mind around the gravity of his family's situation, but he knew it was bad. They hadn't had this many council members in his house, ever._

 _"Robin?"_

 _Turning, he watched as she walked up to him, strawberry blonde curls bouncing on her shoulders, bright blue eyes rimmed red and terrified. Shuffling on the log, she settled beside him, grabbing a few blades of grass in silence, tying them slowly into a braid._

 _"They are mad at me aren't they?"_

 _He shrugged, digging his stick into the dirt, drawing mindless patterns as the hollering intensified. Feeling her stiffen beside him, the sniffle that parted saddened his usual happy soul._

 _"I didn't mean to do it" She whispered through the fat tear droplets that fell onto rosy pink freckled cheeks. "It was an accident"_

 _It was always an accident, always something that she never meant to happen, but couldn't control. Sighing heavily, he dropped his stick, wrapping an arm around her tiny shoulders. He did know that she was far too young to have this burden looming above her. Just six years old, they should be playing in a field, she should be laughing without care – not dreading leaving her own house._

 _He was her protector, had shielded her from the glares and angry whispers from people who just didn't understand. On more than one occasion, he had come home with a bloody lip, or swollen eye from getting into a fight with other boys when they made fun of his sister. She became his shadow, quiet and meek, losing her smile everyday._

 _"I know you didn't Sarah…but this time I think it's really bad"_

 _She nodded, crying into his warm shoulder. They were tied together, she needed him like no other person in this world, would always need him. Her palms sparked as the tears poured from her eyes._

 _"Sarah! Stop" he clutched her hands together, clamping down the bubbling over of her magic._

 _Magic…why did she have to be born with it? Why couldn't it have been him to deal with it instead of his sister. It wasn't fair – life wasn't fair, he knew that, wished even at his tender young age to take it from her, protect her from everything, fight off the world on his own just so she would smile again._

 _"I'm sorry" she sobbed, brushing away her tears, forcing her eyes shut in an effort to tamp down the uncontrollable magic that was causing so much pain and hurt. "Is it going to be okay Robin?"_

 _Turning their matching blue eyes met, both riddled with fear and concern. Grimacing, Robin shrugged, pulling her into his arms with a hard hug. He didn't know what to say, he knew what happened was bad, the worst it had ever been, and his 10 year old heart ached for his young sibling._

 _"I'll protect you Sarah, always"_

 _The door behind them slammed open, and instantly, he was rigid once more, blocking Sarah behind him as his parents and the other council members stalked towards them. Catching his parents eyes, fear flooded him. His mother was crying, sobbing into his father's arms as he scowled through his own tears._

 _"Move boy!" one of the men shouted, reaching out to tear Robin away, but Marcus beat the other man to him, standing like a concrete statue in front of his children._

 _"Do not touch them!" He hollered into the other man's face._

 _"Marcus, we have made a decision. She is a danger to the entire town, she cannot stay!"_

 _"Richard please‼ She is but a child. We will find her help!"_

 _"It's been decided, you cannot fight what the council deems acceptable to protect our lands" Another huffed out, crossing his arms over his chest._

 _"Daddy?" Sarah whispered out from behind Robin, reaching up to clutch her father's large hands._

 _Marcus looked down at his daughter, so beautiful and warm, and so burdened by this fate._

 _"It's alright Sarah, stay with Robin" He kissed the top of her head before pushing her back behind him, his wife now standing beside, forming a small fruitless barrier between his children and the men who wanted to tear them apart._

 _"Please Peter, have mercy on my daughter" Elena begged, tears streaming down her face as she clutched to Marcus._

 _"I'm sorry, but we cannot have that witch—"_

 _"She is my DAUGHTER!"_

 _"SHE IS A WITCH!" Peter thundered back, "And there is no place for her here"_

 _The group of men marched forward, eyes cold as ice, drawing their weapons with each advancing step. And Robin was terrified, his heart pounding in his chest as Sarah screamed and scrambled behind him. The Locksley's backed into the wall of the house, surrounded._

 _"I do not wish to hurt you Marcus, but if you do not move aside, I will have no choice. She is not staying here"_

 _Robin's father didn't move from his spot in front of his children, "Then you will have to kill me before I let you get anywhere near my family"_

 _"Papa no!" Robin cried out, but it was to late, and what had started out as a beautiful sun filled day had now become a nightmare. It happened too fast for him to understand, one moment his father was standing before him, the next the men were dragging him away, beating him with clubs as he tried to fight back._

 _He could hear his mother screaming, Sarah crying behind him as he stared at his father's blood that was beginning to puddle. They ripped his mother away, as she clawed and flailed within their grasps, crying so hard there were no words that came clear._

 _"ROBIN‼" the young girl clutched to the back of his shirt as they stepped into the crook of the wall, his small body the last of defence. He knew he was crying, could feel the heat on his face from the wetness, and try as he might, he couldn't stop them. Not when he growled and hid his sister behind him, it did nothing to slow the advancing men._

 _Picking up a thick branch, he swung violently, feeling the end connect with the abdomen of one of the men. "STAY AWAY‼" He screamed, whipping his weapon back and forth. But what is a young boy of 10 against men four times his age with more height, more weight, more muscle and swords at their disposal._

 _"Move out of the way Robin" Richard seethed._

 _"NO! LEAVE HER ALONE!"_

 _"She is dangerous, boy."_

 _"NO SHE ISN'T! It was an accident what happened!"_

 _Gruffing Richard grabbed onto the swinging branch, ripping it from Robin's grasp, hauling the boy forward into the dirt. Robin sputtered and coughed, momentarily unable to breath._

 _"It was an accident that has left someone nearly dead – I will not take the chance next time the healers won't be able to save another"_

 _Moving past Robin on the ground, he kicked the boy in the side, rolling him further away as the other man grabbed the little girl who was frozen in fear. Scrambling, Robin ran to his sister, punching and kicking till they relinquished their grip. Nose bloodied and side aching, he barricaded himself in front of Sarah once more, feeling her tiny hands grip onto his arm. He never saw it happen, not until the thud hit him from the side, sending him collapsing into the ground once more. His ear rang, vision blurring with black spots, the last thing that hit him was the crying of his sister, and the feeling of losing her hand in his own, and then the world faded black._

..

...

 *******PRESENT TIME*******

Friar Tuck sighed heavily, rubbing his calloused palm along Robin's back as he cried into his palms. He never knew, not even an inkling that there was such darkness and pain in his leader, and he understood why Robin had never spoken of his past.

"What happened when you woke?"

Sniffing back his tears, Robin stared into the fire, his voice cracking as he exhaled "I don't remember a lot, I was unconscious for 3 days. My father had gone out to search for Sarah, but never came back with her"

"I'm sorry lad"

Shaking his head, he threw a branch into the dying embers "I promised I would protect her…"

"You were only ten Robin. You did the best you could"

"I thought she died"

Silence deafened around them.

"I couldn't protect her, and I have lived for years thinking that she was dead because I couldn't save her"

Humming in his grimace the Friar, reached over to grip Robins clenched hands, patting them softly in his own.

"You did what you could"

Tensing, the memory of earlier pulls back into his mind… "She seemed so angry Tuck…her eyes were hollow and cold, and what she did to Regina, it was as though she was enjoying torturing her"

"Did you speak to Regina about this? After all she is rather well versed in dark magic" he frowned, still unsure in his own heart about his feelings towards the Queen.

Robin shook his head, "No, I … I was in shock, I still am… I just came here, hoping you could provide me with some advice"

"I'm sorry Robin, I do not know what to tell you. If Sarah is indeed out for revenge, then we will have to face her head on. But I believe that it's not out of true vengeance"

"What do you mean?"

"When trauma takes over someone's heart, it changes them, sometimes consumes, but underneath is what is true. She is probably scared and doesn't know how to come back to you as your sister"

"You really think that?"

Smiling small, Friar Tuck shrugged "I choose to believe that no one wishes to be angry or alone. We all seek companionship and love, tis the nature of life"

Exhaling heavily, Robin nods, his eyes trailing back to the Castle, finding on instant the balcony that rises high above most. He suddenly feels a lick of shame bubble through him, at the way he stalked off from Regina… minutes after she had been tortured by his sister. Groaning, his hand runs over his tired face.

"You should go to her"

"Sarah?"

Chuckling, Friar Tuck patted Robin's leg, "Regina."

He knows it too, and maybe the Friar is right, maybe she will have some sort of thoughts and advice on how to handle his sister. She could possibly be his best option in reality.

"Goodnight Robin. I am here if you need to talk further"

'Thank you Tuck"

They bid one another goodbye and Robin starts off right away to the Castle. It feels like an eternity as he climbs the steps up to her room. The weight of everything dragging him sister was back, she had dark magic, and was threatening his love. What a day…

..

...

...

He sighs, hitting the top landing, and trudging down the hallway to the massive oak carved doors. He felt ashamed that he had left Regina without so much as a word or explanation, had let go of her hand, and walked away without a second thought, to wrapped up in his family's past. He barely even asked if she was alright. Pushing the door open slowly, he finds the room empty at first. The large bed untouched, vanity clear, bathing room dark and he frowns, wondering where she is. The sway of the curtains at the balcony doors alerts him, and with a thick saddened inhale, he closes the distance, till her bare feet come into his view, crossed over one another, fallen out from the thick blanket that is tugged over her legs.

"Regi—" he stops himself, seeing her eyes drawn closed, thick lashes creating a shadow on the olive cream of her skin. Her head is lolled to the side, resting against the dark cushions, her long chocolate curls framing her face and falling over her chest, rising and falling with each slumbering breath. It never fails to escape him, just how beautiful she is. The ruby parted lips, he could get lost in kissing, chocolate of her eyes he drowns within daily. Her body, slender and small, yet holds the power of sexuality like a burning pyre.

He sits down beside her, bumping her hips gently as he turns into her. He can see the darkened circles under her eyes, the slight grimace on her face. It had not been a kind few months for her body, nor her mind, and he wishes desperately to soothe the aches and pains that plague her. His thumb settles against the smoothness of her cheekbone, rubbing gently along her skin, half wondering whether it is more so for him to find refuge in her, than the other way around.

She sighs deeply, sinking into his touch unconsciously, and he can't help the smile that parts on his face at her actions. So many years lost with her, so many moments they could have shared, so many times he wishes he was there to protect her. His heart weighs heavy, being a protector isn't exactly easy…he is finding out the hard way. He brushes back a strand of her hair, tucking it neatly behind her ear as his other palm comes to rest on the swell of her chest, letting the steady beating of her heart anchor him to the ground.

His eyes close as he leans into her, dropping a kiss to her cheek, breathing in the rich caramel of her hair. And he breathes, slowly and deep, letting time tick by as he counts the beats of her heart.

"Hey"

Her voice quiet and tired as he sits up slowly to meet her hooded gaze.

"Hi"

Regina shuffles up the chair slightly, staring up into his blue eyes, he looks exhausted, drained and ready to sleep for a thousand years if time would allow. Her hand finds his on her chest, lacing their fingers together as she rubs the back of his palm with her thumb.

"You okay?"

He nods, licking the dryness from his lips as he sighs, his eyes focusing onto their hands, gripping hers back a fraction tighter as he pulls them to his lips, kissing her knuckles over twice before moving her palm to cup his cheek. And she does so, without hesitation, cradling his face as his eyes close. Her fingers reach back to scratch the stubble on his jaw, her heart glowing as he leans into her further.

"I'm sorry"

She frowns, stopping the caress on her hand on his face.

"Why are you sorry?"

"I shouldn't have left you like that"

"Robin…"

"No. I shouldn't have. I should have made sure you were alright first. I am sorry Regina"

"You don't have to apologize, I understand. You were in shock"

"Doesn't amend the fact that you are my priority" He turns to kiss her palm, holding her hand to his face. Her heart pounds in her chest at his words, her lips parting into a soft smile as his eyes finally flicker open, glueing to hers.

"I accept your apology" she chuckles lightly.

"No Regina, I have been an ass"

"Will you stop. I said I accept, that's the end of it" she pats his cheek and resumes the scratching of her fingers into his hair.

"Thank You"

She hums, deciding it is better to not tell him it's unnecessary, knowing he will put up a fight, and given that she is down right exhausted, and so is he, she will let this one slide.

"I didn't know you had a sister"

"I never spoke of her to anyone" he bites down on his lower lip hard, eyes cinching together as he grimaces.

Maybe talking isn't what he needs right now, or is ready for at least. They have time tomorrow, to figure it out, what his sister wants, why she is here, and in Regina's own mind, who the hell has that type of dark magic. It was powerful, matching her own, and that was something that didn't sit well in her heart. The only other person who could rank higher on magical ability was Rumple… but whoever this woman was, it would be a fight for second place.

"You should get some sleep" she murmurs, trailing her fingers along his creased brow till it relaxes and he nods, standing up slowly, not letting her hand go as he pulls her up gently with him. She figures he was going to go to his own room, where Roland slept most likely tonight…and while she would rather him be here with her, she also understood the more than likely situation that he needed some space.

So it was to her shock that he walked them straight to her bed, shucking off his boots, trousers and shirt in a minute before crawling onto the plush mattress. He wants to stay…to stay with her, to let her ease his troubled soul, to be his rock. Her smile only widens as she lay beside him, tugging the duvet over their shoulders as she watches him burrow closer to her. A hand extending out under her pillow, the other firmly placed on the back of her hip, dipping down into the small of her back, holding her tight to him.

"What's with the cheshire cat grin M'lady?"

Regina blushes hard, but can't tamp down her smile even still. Carding her fingers through his hair, their eyes lock together and their breathing evens out into sync.

"I'm just happy you're here, that's all"

"I have no intention of leaving"

His statement though lightly whispered, hits her hard in its sincerity and truth. He tilts her chin up, catching her lips soft and languid for a few passing seconds, drinking in the way she melts into his arms.

No he has no intentions of ever leaving her, ever again.

Humming as their lips part, Regina tucks under his chin, resting her forehead into the crook of his neck, absorbing the thick nature of his scent and the strong pulse of his heart under her palm.

"I have no intention of letting you go"

She whispers, barely audible and when Robin doesn't respond, it's alright, she knows he is finally being claimed by a much needed sleep. As the night rolls on, her mind races, evading her own need for rest. She listens to his breathing, watches the steady rise and fall of his thick chest, trailing her fingers over the multiple scars on his body.

She doesn't want to let him go, but the fear that something, or rather someone is coming to tear them away from one another, freezes fear into her heart. She's lost him once, and will damn sure die fighting to keep that from happening again.

Sister or no sister…


	13. Chapter 13

"Gina‼"

Her heart smiles at the small voices that echoes around the dining hall, glowing in fact, as the mop of curly brown hair comes plummeting through the crowd of legs, his tiny body coming to a skidding halt as she bends down to his level.

"Hi baby" she nuzzle his nose, the boy giggling as he moves into her arms, burrowing himself against her with a tight hug. He has been her salvation in this land. This precious little child who looks at her like she is the stars, sun and moon all in one. Loving him was never the issue, she couldn't have blocked her heart from his invasion even if she tried.

What did ache her soul however, was the feeling of him tucked into her, the light baby smell of his hair, bright dimples and chocolate eyes that smiled up at her. Roland is loveable, loving to the enth degree. It brings memories back of her own son; one that would tap her cheeks in the middle of the night to wake her up; for he needed a mommy snuggle that instant- her own baby that used to cling to her tightly during rain storms as she sang song after song to ease his fear, a perfect little boy who create the most beautiful chaotic rukous in her heart.

She misses him, god awfully so, but somehow, beyond Regina's belief, there is some light in this realm once more.

Roland is her light.

Alongside the burning ember that is his father, and between the two of them it's not so depressing, not so overwhelmingly dark everyday. There's no doubt in her mind, life would have gone very differently had Robin and Roland not been here…if life had even decided to go on.

It's not to say these past weeks haven't been hard, they indeed have beaten her down, to the point of tears. She'd be lying to say she hasn't be plagued with nightmares about losing her son, or walking through the castle feeling the urge to vomit from past horrors. It's everywhere. Reminders of a life she would beg to forget, moments that have let scars on her body, and in her heart like deep set wounds that refuse to heal.

Life is hard for the Queen. It always has been, and she is certain it always will be.

"Gina, I brought you flowers"

She pulls back to find his face, only to be confronted with a massive bouquet of wild colors, tied together by a braided leafy band, a signature of another outlaw that has stolen her heart.

Smiling, she snuggles Roland in tight, peppering his chubby cheeks with affection till he is pushing her off with a beautiful childish laugh. How easy he loves her, it's a true anomaly to most that watch the little display, the son of a thief has cracked the code to the Evil Queen cold heart.

Leaving him with one more kiss at the tip of his nose, she thanks him softly, brushing back his curls to catch his eyes "They are the most beautiful you've ever brought me".

"Really?"

"Really"

She is supposed to have another dreaded council meeting with the Charmings, munchkins and Granny, but Roland has decided otherwise for her, firmly taking her hand, tugging her outside the hall with haste – seems like she is going out to play for the afternoon instead. Surely for a few hours she won't be missed, not that anyone back there will ever really miss her. They can handle ruling the kingdom without her for the day. It's what they always wanted anyway.

She has more important things to do.

One of them being this incessant pulling on her hand from Roland, the other, a bright beaming smile of her handsome thief, who is leaning against the oak doors of the castle.

It's been 8 days since Robin's sister, _Sarah_ as Regina has come to understand, had revealed herself. 8 long days of her watching him suffer through memories, tread painfully through a past he'd long locked away. Some days he is here, with her, holding her hand and talking about a life she never knew.

And then some days he isn't.

He's simply gone for hours that she counts silently to herself, and though she'd never tell him, she waits and worries, doing her best to occupy her mind with other things…but it never works, it's a constant niggling fear when he is absent from her.

It's not her place to tell him he can't leave the castle (or her for that matter), isn't truly allowed to refuse his wish to leave the shield and protection she is providing. Not being able to control his whereabouts…well it's eating her up with every minute he goes.

It was an argument early on, she realized she wasn't going to win, given that Robin put it oh so poetically- _I'm an outlaw, I don't follows rules well M'lady._

Outlaw indeed.

What's she supposed to do?

Cast a spell to ensure he can't ever leave without her…it was an option she most definitely toyed with for a few lonely hours, yet the memories of her mother doing the same thing days before she married the King turned her mind otherwise.

She is not his commander or master. He may call her his Queen, but that doesn't really hold much in the way of holding to her demands.

They are together, but in many ways they aren't. It's become a strange wading of territory between them. Either would dispute the affections they have for the other, but it's never really been said. Sure, they spend many nights together, simply sleeping curled in side by side, trading a few soft kisses and soft soothing caresses, but they've never gone further…note that the desire isn't there. It's palpable the needing tension between them, but she is afraid, as is he, rightfully so when there is so much damage in their respective hearts.

Yet Regina eats breakfast with them, he and Roland usually join her for lunch, and dinner is whose ever table has more space.

They aren't separate, but they aren't together…at least she isn't sure if they are. It's not like she doesn't want to be with him, nor he with her…but the past is thick, they are two broken pieces trying to figure out where they fit in a puzzle, hoping for it to be side by side, but in the end, unsure.

"Hello you two"

"Hi daddy! I gave Gina the flowers we picked"

"I can see that my boy"

Regina smiles, walking straight into the awaiting arm of Robin, leaning into the kiss on her temple. It's natural, like it was always meant to be from the start. "They are beautiful thank you" - "Anything for you M'lady".

He is so damn handsome, she muses as her eyes trail up his features, just so bloody beautiful to look at. Thick shoulders, square jaw, blonde stubble that fades into sandy brown hair. She could draw his entire face from memory, has it etched out in her mind, forever to keep; has come to know all the lines around his sky blue eyes, the gentle slope of his nose, deep set dimples in his cheeks. It's a picture to her. A painting her soul stored away. She can feel her heart picking up a beat as her gaze settles on his soft pink lips, seeing the slight parted grin on his face, the pressing of his tongue along the top row of teeth as he smirks at her. Such perfect kissable lips she'd like nothing more than to have against her own right now, taking a minute to drown in the mint whiskey taste of his mouth.

They haven't been that forthcoming of their relationship to anyone, though won't deny it, if someone questions, but haven't made some declaration that seems fit for those like the Charmings.

She doesn't need theatrics, some bold statement that Robin is the one who holds her heart (even if she hasn't exactly told him that in her own words yet).

It's easier this way. To just be on the boundary of tethered and not, just incase…

It's a few minutes before she realizes where she's been dragged off (happily) to. Just around the corner side of the lake that sparkles between rolling hills, bordered with thick mossy trees and wildflower filled fields.

Such a pretty place she lived….lives.

Henry would love it.

"Roland and I wanted to ask if you would join us for a picnic Your Majesty"

Cocking an eyebrow at Robin, they part through the final section of lavender rows, to find a small blanket splayed out on the grass beneath an oak tree, a basket sitting on it's edge.

How can the darkness survive when there are moments like this that make Regina feel as though she is about to burst and float away.

Gripping Robin's hand tight, a happy sigh escapes as they settle down onto the layout, like some small little family tucked into their own world. She's only missing one piece…a piece that is lost forever.

They pick at the food Robin brought, Roland providing the entertainment as he lets his imagination run wild, between fighting off dragons with his sword (that is actually a branch), saving princesses from ogres and pretending to be an eagle in the sky, flying over all the lands, free as can be.

They laugh as the child animatedly enacts just exactly how he would shoot down the the big hairy ugly beasts with his bow and arrow " _just like papa does"_.

Robin slowly tucks himself beside Regina, leaning gently against the solid bark of the tree behind, his fingers find the open expanse of her arm, running softly up and down her skin, soaking in the rose sugar smell of her hair she she tips down to rest against his shoulder. He could get used to this. Having her here, beside him, listening to his son babble on about nothing really, but Robin is content.

For the first time in years, there is a sense of happy in his heart.

He's getting there, back to that place where the sun was warm and bright, the days seeming to short rather than endless hours.

There is never enough time for him now. Not enough minutes in the day where he can spend holding a woman who has held his heart for decades, too few hours to listen to the light breathless laughs she gives, not nearly enough seconds for him to soak in the dazzling smile that lightens his whole world.

He'd freeze time if he could.

One simple wish, that for these new beautiful moments, he could stop the moving of the sun, just so he could revel in them for a second longer.

He can feel her shuffling, arching her back slightly in discomfort to her current position beside him, a thick exhale parting as her eyes momentarily cinch together.

"Come here", he adjusts, widening his legs for her to climb in between. Her eyes catch his, a skip in her heart as she takes in the feeling of this, of them. It feels like, well, happiness – like what finding solace and comfort should be. Yet there is always that fraction of her mind that refuses to give way.

She's the _Evil_ Queen.

That title will never escape her. There is no true happiness in that life, in this life that she deserves. Years upon years of wreckage and havoc, dark curses and cutting away the demons in her path, who gets to have a happy ending after what she has done.

It's that continual flicker of doubt and self loathing that has her momentarily hesitating, staring into Robin's eyes, trying to find a reason that he is here with her. Yes the past is messy, she made choices, and ultimately is paying the price for them. She chose to send Robin away (granted it was to save his life, but still)…she chose to turn to Rumplestiltskin and let the darkness invade her heart, chose to hunt Snow White till the bitter end, and chose to cast a curse that only ended with Regina losing everything once more.

Maybe she is one of those people that isn't written to win.

There are always villains in every lifetime, in every story, and she is it in this one.

Villains don't get happy endings, she knows that. It's been beaten into her brain a thousand and one times.

"Regina?"

The sound of his voice pulls her back from the building sorrow of her mind, and the smile she tries to fake, doesn't for a second pass Robin. Frowning, he reaches for her hand, lacing their fingers together, his lips meeting her knuckles with a questioning look.

"Sorry, I just was thinking"

"About?"

She can't tell him she is feeling like this; like they have no chance at a future together when she is who she is. He deserves more than her, better than her.

Grasping at straws, the lie is mumbled and stammered – claiming something alongs the lines of Roland needing to be careful being so far away from them. Robin just watches as she bites down on her lower lip, tilting his head slightly to find the dropped gaze of her own. Two fingers lift her chin, just high enough that his lips can catch hers, pressing with ease as she hums lightly into him.

"Come lean against me, love"

 _Lean against me…lean on me…_ He is pure, and good – everything she is not. It's easier if she just puts on a mask, blocking him out from what she is feeling…let him think she is fine, that they are okay.

She follows his lips tentatively as Robin retreats slowly, guiding her back with a palm on her hips, the other carded through her hair till she is situated with her back to his chest, his thighs cradling her own, his arms swooping to wrap around her torso, hugging her to the warmth of his body.

Safe, he is so so safe. To a point that Regina has to blink back the tears that brim on her lashes. So safe and so unfair. He will always be in danger being with her. Roland will always be a target, and she will lose them both.

Swallowing down the thickness that builds in her throat, she watches as the little light in her world bounces around on the shore line, picking shells and flowers, without a single care in the world. He is not hers, but he feels like it. A son that has burrowed his way into her heart. A son she doesn't feel very deserving of.

Leaning into Robin's arms, she soaks in the richness of his woodsy spice smell, the thickness of his arms, steady beating of his heart against her back. It's probably for the best if she stops this now, weans herself off of these two, breaks the ties early on so the heartbreak is less painful (she knows it's a lie – the bitter taste on her tongue it leaves, heartbreak is always unkind).

There is no future with the Former Evil Queen, and they deserve all the happiness in the world.

She feels Robin's lips brush against her jaw, gently kissing the smooth skin of her neck- unable to help it, Regina arches to his touch, just slightly so, enough that his hands curl around her waist further, glueing their bodies together. Just for today, she can live this life for a few more hours. Happy to pretend they are together without reservation. She does love him, is reasonably certain he feels the same in some capacity. It can't be wrong, to let go for a little while longer…to lace her fingers into his own, closing her eyes so all she can feel is him pressed against her, strong and solid – safe and warm.

..

...

...

"Regina! Robin!" A holler comes from the tree's, as they turn to find a sweating Little John bursting through the tree's, hair a muck, skin beat red and soaked with exhaustion.

 _So much for a moment of peace…._

"John, what's wrong?"

Regina hauls Roland into her arms first, kissing his forehead quickly as his brown eyes meet her in tremored worry, before coming up beside Robin.

Something is off, the little hairs on the back of her neck standing up at pin point, a quelling bubble in her stomach rolling as John inhales heavy hard breaths.

"John? Is everyone alright? Did something happen at the camp? The castle?"

The man nods his head, leaning against the tree for support, coughing slightly as he tries to right himself.

 _He seriously needs to lay off at the buffet._

"It's Sarah"

Her heart drops at the name, surely as Robin's face falls at the same time. Reflexively her hands hug Roland tighter to her.

"She's at the castle, Robin"

"Is anyone hurt?"

"No. We saw her appear in front of the doors, she tried to open them, but Her Majesty's protection spell held…she's demanding to see you"

The two men lock eyes, a matching frown between them.

He shouldn't go alone, not when his sister has magic, and Regina will be damned to hell and back if she is going to let him.

"Alright"

 _No, absolutely not._

"Robin-"

"It's fine Regina –"

"You can't be serious"

The heat in her heart spikes as she stares at Robin, completely flabbergasted that he would even think for a bloody moment, she was going to let him go off on his own.

 _Fat chance._

"Regina, listen to me, take Roland back with your magic"

"No"

"No?"

"I am not going to let you walk out unarmed against that woman" she retorts hotly to the shocked man in front of her.

"I won't be unarmed"

"Your pointy sticks won't do anything"

"I just want to talk to her"

"Cause that went so well last time when she decided to drop in for a chat. She electrocuted me…twice!"

She can see the slight grimace on Robin's face at her words, half wishes her tone wasn't quite so sharp, but her blood is boiling. Setting Roland down, Little John saddling up beside her to grab the young boy, uttering a quick _I'll take him…_

"I asked you to take Roland" - "John is more than capable" - Robin huffs, running a hand down his face as he levels a hard stare at the Queen.

Stubborn mule against a stubborn mule.

He will be fine. Sarah is his sister, she won't hurt him…at least he doesn't think so. But Regina has already been attacked once…and Robin will be damned if he lets it happen again.

"How do you suppose John gets into the Castle hmmm? Waltz by my sister with a happy hello?"

 _God he can be such an ass sometimes._

Flicking her wrists with an annoyed exhale, the two are gone in a cloud of purple smoke, leaving Robin aggravated beyond words.

"There"

The tension between the pair that remain is palpable as he frowns angrily at the heated stare pointed back at him.

"God, you can be so bloody hard headed sometimes, you know that?"

"I'm the Queen, of course I know that" Regina blows back, her arms crossing in front of her chest in defiance, the long lost royal mask building block by block as they stand at a deadlock.

They haven't argued like this before…not really, but dammit, if he is going to put up a fight about her trying to help protect him, well Regina is ready for battle.

"Are you going to pout, or can we get on with this problem"

"She's not a problem" Robin growls, the mixing of guilt and pain coiling deep in his stomach. He told Regina about his sister, what had happened…how dare she for a second call her a problem…like she is some vermin that needs removal. "Be serious Robin, she threatened both you and I not two weeks ago…how is that not a problem?"

"Because! You don't understand do you. She is lost, I lost her. It's just a reaction to everything in our past, how can you condemn her like that"

"I haven't condemned her to anything! But she has magic, strong, dark magic. You are being naive if you think she doesn't pose some sort of threat"

"She is my sister Regina!" Robin grits out, his fists clenching tight to his sides.

"I'm well aware" she hisses hotly "but it still doesn't negate that she needs to be dealt with"

"What do you think I am trying to do!?"

"Apparently getting yourself killed‼"

God she is impossible, utterly impossible to deal with. He's not some frail child that can't take care of himself. He has a sister, one he thought he lost…and now, maybe there is a chance he can have her back, can have his family back, a small piece of his heart long torn out that could be renewed, why on earth can't Regina see that!?

He is being completely stupid. Great, fine, fantastic, your sister is back…a sister you haven't seen in years, one that has dark magic funneling through her, and he apparently has no qualms with the fact they both have already been attacked by her. Regina in particular! Electrocuted, a blinding hot spike of pain that torn through her veins…twice!…but no…this _sister_ is what's important…never Regina. Once again she is coming last. Being chosen second.

His back is turned to her now, head tilted up to the sky as though the clouds are going to give him an answer or something ridiculous. He's pissed, at her, why?, she doesn't know. She is trying to help him, keep him around for his son…god knows what that witch would do to him.

By the taste of her magic, it's pure darkness, like the magic that flows through Regina. It's dark, it's tainted and it's dangerous. Not that Robin would know that, or apparently is going to trust her on it that fact. Dark magic comes from pain, from betrayal and anger. There is no gentle caress in it. No loving sprinkles, unicorns and princess stickers that will shower down on you. The point of dark magic is just that…darkness- consuming, soul eating, wound burning darkness. It causes destruction, that's its entire purpose.

"Why won't you trust me?" his voice hits the wind as it falls around her, exasperated at her defiance, though he is unwilling to bend even slightly for her.

"It's not like you're trusting me either" she barbs back. Exhaling heavily, Robin turns around, blue eyes flooded in pain and confusion as they find whiskey chocolate brown hard set yet so uncertain. For a moment she looks lost, almost hurt…it aches him that he is causing it, but she can't come with him

"Regina" he sighs "It's just…"

"I'm trying to help you, but you apparently don't want me to and I don't understand why!"

He shakes his head, breaking their gaze, and that feeling of not being enough flares into her as a sickening realization sets in.

He doesn't trust her…

It's like a bucket of ice cold water being splashed in her face, burning her skin as she gapes open at him. After everything…it's not there. The countless times she has saved him, fought for him, done everything in her power to keep it alive…he still doesn't truly forgive her for their past.

 _God she's been such an idiot –living in some fantasy world with him._

The cracks in her heart crater, a sucker punch to the gut as the tears well up in her thick lashes, a brewing need to throw up heating her body.

She will never be enough for him.

No matter how many times she says she is sorry for banishing him in the first place, it doesn't make a damn difference in how he is looking at her now (well how she assumes he is looking at her, the need to suck back her tears has clouded her vision).

Always a villain…even when she isn't being one.

They aren't each other's happy ending, they can't be, not when her heart is tearing up between wanting to set the entire forest on fire or crumbling into a pile of broken dust. Another fraction of hope gone, and there isn't a damn thing she can do otherwise.

His footsteps that crinkle the grass, pull her back into reality, the distance between them slowly closing as she stares down at the ground. Not now, she can't do this now- she just needs space, away from him, away from the dream that is now a sad broken wish. The air becomes thick in her lungs as she inhales hard, it's not the time to break down – not with him here – not when he knows what to say to make her believe in a happy ending that can't happen.

"Fine"

She's gone before he can reach her, the last wisps of purple smoke fluttering around his feet as he reaches out to grab her.

..

...

...

He does trust her, implicitly so – how could he not. She's saved him time and time again, through her own heartbreak and wretched life, over and over she has come to his aid, whether he knew it or not at the time. He lets his son be with her for christ's sake, his most precious light in the entire world he gives her free reign of – he trusts her with everything he has.

It's fear that bubbles in his heart as he blows out a breath, fear that she will be taken away from him again. How can be possibly let her walk with him to face his sister when he has no idea what they would confront. He can't take that chance, not with Regina, not when he has finally gotten her back.

He has her, doesn't he? She is back, with him, they are happy…they can be happy…can't they? The last look in her eyes isn't sitting well in his heart, the final look of sadness that flooded her perfect features…he did that.

..

...

...

"Sarah! Please just listen to me!" he hollers desperately as he is thrown down to the ground, groaning at the impact of hitting solid dirt one more, rocks splitting through his skin for the umpteenth time in the past few minutes.

It's not going well, not in the slightest.

He had walked up to the Castle, finding his long lost sibling angrily throwing spindles of magic against Regina's hard set barrier, useless in breaking it. The growls and rage filled scowls spiking unsettling nerves through him as he drew back his bow, and for a moment it pointed directly at her, a straight shot through the back. It could be quick, maybe just through the leg…something to incapacitate her until he can slow down the thunderous fireworks that shoot from her hands.

Stealing the fear that bubbled, he called out her name…

And she looked furious, cold blue eyes dead panned as she sneered to his presence, a darkly muttered laugh _my my my, look who finally decided to show_ up….There hadn't been much time to talk after that…near immediately Robin was being tossed around like a rag doll – slamming into the tree's as he begged for her to just give him a minute to talk.

"You want to talk!" The witches nails clawing at his throat as her magic binds him to a tree trunk. "Let's talk, Brother. Where should we start?" she cackles, bearing her teeth as her hands scratch across his skin, drawing long hard red lines "Oh‼ I know, how about how when you all abandoned me as a child, letting those men haul me off, that was fun wasn't it"

His lungs are burning for air as she squeezes his torso with invisible vice grips, bruising the muscle underneath as he tries to fight for a moment's reprieve. "Or how about how I was blindfolded, bound and starved for years before being traded from family to family as a slave…makes you all warm and fuzzy inside doesn't it".

He's going to die, she is going to suffocate him here and now, and there isn't a damn thing he can do to stop her…she has magic…dark unkind magic, fueled but unrelenting hate he can't apologize for. Magic that Regina warned him about…had tried to get it through his thick skull that maybe, just bloody well maybe, it was dangerous going in alone.

"I was sold, to a man that created me, showed me how to take back my life, my freedom, how to gain power…" Robin hisses as his body begins to give way, black dots blurring his vision as Sarah steps in, close enough he can feel her hot breath on his face as she screams at him without pause "He made me, proved that I was not weak, that I could punish those that failed me…like you, like mother and like father…you never came for me‼"

 _If he could just get a second to explain…._

..

...

...

She is pacing, about to burn through the floor if she continues, but it's been near two hours and he's not back yet, and for the most irritating, annoying, god awful scared reason, she can feel it, that something is wrong. It has to be, her heart wouldn't be pounding this bloody furiously if he was fine. This is so so bad, she shouldn't have left him, alone, basically defenceless- feelings aside she is cursing herself for letting him go.

He's probably okay… he has to be okay. She will give him till midnight…just another hour, or maybe till 1130…she could go now…really there isn't much point in waiting. They have to talk, they need to talk. This overwhelming burning in her stomach at his absence it choking her…she needs one more minute with him – just to have his arms wrap around her, his stubble to graze her temple, she can do it…they can figure something out, hopefully…if the idiot decides to show up anytime soon.

Huffing, she turns on the spot, spying one of his green woodland jackets strewn across the chaise on her balcony. How many times must she tell him to take it when he goes…she isn't a maid for christ sake…but by the gods, it is smells just like him as she inhales deeply into the green fabric. Thick in the spiced wood yet fresh like rain. She'd be embarrassed at the slight moan that escapes her if anyone was around to hear it. Holding it to her, she stands, slowly – debating for a minute once more if she should go find him…he's probably in the dining hall with the other Merry Men.

He doesn't want to see her, he couldn't, not after this afternoon…and she isn't sure she knows what she would say to him now. She doesn't deserve him, he doesn't trust her…but dammit all to hell, she loves him and it's aggravating beyond comprehension.

Her life is not some sappy romance novel, there is no world shattering kiss that happens after a breakup – no bright beautiful realizations that maybe, Robin can't live without her, running at breakneck speed to hold her in his arms again, refusing to let her go, demanding between passionate kissing that she loves him back and they would fall together into a pile of plush blankets, proving just how much they are meant to be together…

No, as much as the fantasy flickers heat in her heart, it's not her reality. She is the Evil Queen, it's just what it is. Folding his coat, she lays it on her bed, fumbling as the sleeves tuck into the sides, a irritating hard bulge in one of the pockets refusing to let the material sit perfectly pressed. Snorting out an irritated breath, she fishes inside the pocket, her fingers grabbing onto a cold slender glass vial.

It's rather pretty, sparkling red liquid with flakes of gold that catch the fire light beside her…she's never come across something like it…the tube growing warmer in her palm as she stares down at it. The vial swirls, and it almost looks like pixie dust for a half second, but where the hell would Robin have gotten it from. It's near impossible to find, even as the Queen (pre Evil days) she had barely heard of the magic before – not until one of Rumple's book has described it as the purest form of light magic. At it's core, it was a way to find supposed "soulmates" – though her former teacher had waved it off with a roll of his eyes, gruffing that _no such thing exists_. It was true love that people sought after – the notion of soulmates was simply a fools tale…nothing more.

If it is pixie dust, then Robin has it to find his true love…he has one out there…everyone does…and this stunning red and gold bottle of magic could lead him to that person. He could have happiness, another chance, a second chance.

It's not her, she knows that concretely, they couldn't be fated together – but she loves him, enough to once more let him go. He can have it, she will find it for him, once he gets back, she will find his happy ending.

Even though it isn't her


	14. Chapter 14

She's not running down the hall, just is moving with pace that's all, not thundering silently down the corridor because her heart is thumping erratically as she certainly does not search for Robin, who hasn't come back yet. It's not her place to be this worried about a man that no one knows is hers...he's not hers….but he is, well, she's not exactly sure...but for now, as she is storming about the castle like a mad woman, he most certainly is.

Everything is quiet tonight, barely anyone around which is odd. The castle is usually still bustling until the early hours of dawn, more often than not with half toasted merry men strewn about, so the fact she can hear her own heels clicking against the stone is more than unsettling. She hates being _unsettled_ the feeling has her already fluttering stomach roll over in knots.

She's going to kill him (kiss him till she can't breathe) once she finds him. It's been far too long for him not to have come back. She can't imagine that his "meeting" with his sister has gone so well he has deciding to apparently abandon Regina herself, not that he would...but he might. Maybe they did hit it off, (not likely), are sitting together mending bridges (again, not likely), it could be happening, he could be so absorbed in the fact his sister is back, that he doesn't much care to return to the castle to see her.

Surely he would have come at some point though, to gloat with that irritatingly beautiful, smug dimpled smile that has her heart somersaulting, in the good, way...not like it is now, as she turns towards the dining hall. He's with his Merry Men, it's the only explanation for his continuing absence. She will find him there, laughing with this forested rag tag band, and she will thank the gods he is alright - silently of course - Robin doesn't need to know how much not having him around has affected her.

A silent prayer with a heated glare, that should do the trick.

Pushing the thick heavy oak door, it's quiet inside, a few stray groupings of people around scattered wooden tables, humming amongst themselves, chuckling over goblets of ale. Snow and Charming are cozied up across from Granny and Grumpy, light and effervescent as always, irritating as always Regina scoffs as they send a shy smile her way.

She's not been particularly fond of the pair since the argument about her departed husband - they don't listen and she feels no need to have a pow-wow with the two. What's in the past is the past, there is no point in dissecting old wounds, exposing the demons that lurk within just so sweet Snow can _understand_ Regina better. She won't ever really understand, has no idea the lengths Regina had gone to protect her from the same fate. For a woman who Regina has spent majority of her life trying to dispose of, it's rather comical almost just how many times she's ended up saving the girl's life. An Evil Queen with an odd soft spot for her one and only prey.

Avoiding their waving, she turns to the other tables, searching for Robin, her heart curling inwards as table by table is void of his presence. He's not here, but some of his men are...Tuck and Alan, and the pompous idiot Will, the crooked nosed buffoon on two legs whom Regina has had the utmost hardest time not incinerating. He's loud, has absolutely no filter, talks without thinking, spews whatever obscene off color comment he wants, especially when the ale is free flowing, and with the Merry Men that is usually standard every night. Robin tastes like ale - a hint of mint leaves that he always chews, on his tongue, but it's a deep and thick malt that drowns Regina, willingly so.

Robin laughs at her annoyance with Will, pokes fun at the heavy rolling in her eyes and exasperated huffs of breath. He _says_ the merry man is a good guy, just a bit younger than most, has yet to come into his maturity level. To which, her usual retort is that he may not make it to his "maturity" age if she has to hear one more lewd story about the "busty bar wench that couldn't keep her hands off him".

..

.

"Your Majesty, it's rather late for you to be up?" Tuck smiles at her, extending a welcoming hand, and she is grateful for it. Grateful that these men haven't really held her past against her. There had been many remarks in the beginning, sharp cracks and below the belt comments early on, but Robin's authority over his band of men apparently holds strong, and with one arch in his eyebrow the judgements have mostly settled down.

Returning the smile, she does not join at their table, but rather chews her lips slightly in a sudden flush of anxiety. She and Robin have been keeping their … relationship for lack of a better term mostly quiet. So the fact that the Queen is up in arms searching at near midnight for the thief must look a bit strange.

Gripeing with herself, she forces her hands to stop shaking, tucking them under her arms crossed over her chest. It's better, maybe will give her an air of boredom, or ambivalence.

"If yer looking for Robin, he ain't here. John and Sam went out a few hours ago to look for him" Alan answers her silent question, and her heart doubles over. Now he's actually missing, which is just bloody fantastic isn't it.

"Did ya scare him off Yer Majesty?" the idiot Will, snorts into his mug of ale, appearing to have no issue poking fun at the once _Evil Queen._ Idiot indeed as her magic flickers out invisibly, draining the Merry Man's goblet of ale, filling it instead with a dark black licorice sludge as he takes a large unassuming swallow.

"Oiy! What the bloody hell!?" He spits and sputters, cursing loudly, dropping the mug onto the table with a clatter, choking as he wipes his mouth with the sleeve of his shirt, unaware of the new black staining of his lips and teeth. And Regina does chuckle, lightly through her heavy smirk, along-side the other men who are cheersing her, wisely telling the young man that maybe the Queen is not to be messed with.

It's nice, being the reason for laughter. She can't really remember the last time she made someone laugh...usually people just scowled at her. Rightfully so, but still, it's nice to see a smile directed at her instead for once.

Tuck turns back finally, now that the amusement has died down, reaching to grasp lightly on Regina's forearm, his gray blue eyes roaming with concern "We thought he was with you" - Regina tenses slightly at the simple sentence _..._ \- "John had volunteered to find you both when Sarah arrived" - her stomach coils, a buzz of guilt running up her spine; she shouldn't have left him. "But you are here, and we've yet to see Robin or John".

"He was with me" she flusters, berating herself internally for how those words just came out. They aren't together, not that her wording did her any justice to cementing that. "I mean, we were with Roland…" Tuck's eyebrows arch in a smile at the notion, but he stays silent as Regina squirms uncharacteristically…. "Roland wanted to go to the lake...I just joined them" God why was this so hard to string a sentence together?

"The boy has taken quite a shining to you"

"I suppose so. He's quite special"

"Too right you are, Your Majesty"

"Please, just Regina"

The older man nods, squeezing Regina's forearm in gesture. "Well then, just Regina. I will let Robin know you were looking for him"

"Oh no, it's alright -" she stammers, not wanting to look desperate; even if she is- "I just…"

"I'll let him know" Tuck grins, cutting off the Queen's rebuttal with a teasing wink, hiding a small smile under the mug of his ale. Regina blushes lightly, thanking him before bidding the group a pleasant evening as she turns to walk out of the dining hall. _Well now where?_

Minutes seem to pass as hours as her nerves twitch and spark, that unsettling helix in her stomach spinning like a table top. He could be with Roland, tucked away in bed together, it's entirely possible, though her heart has other thoughts, it's at least worth it to check.

Clicking quickly along the stone floors, the expansive curling stairway comes into view, in the same moment the side doors slam open, a hard bang that has Regina jumping in her skin, a hand flying to her heart that she swears has just stopped….but as she takes in John and Michael carrying what horridly looks like Robin's body between them….it has her heart deadening for an entirely different reason.

She near runs over to John, who has relinquished his hold on Robin to two of the other Merry Men, their names escaping Regina in her panic. The door behind Little John closes softly, just as she closes the distance, her heart shaking furiously, matching the tremble in her voice "John? John is he alright? What Happ-?".

Little John is kind, his size the most intimidating thing about him, but the man has a soft soul, she has seen it many times- but the look in his dark emerald eyes as he turns from the doorway, it has Regina suddenly stopping mid sentence.

His frame towers over her, blocking the entrance to the door, where Robin is just beyond, and while she may be the Queen, the _Evil_ Queen by previous reputation, the look John gives her has Regina feeling lower than the jail cell occupants that clean the streets as punishment. He is angry with her, beyond angry, the fire behind his eyes storming as she swallows thickly, attempting to build up her back bone that he has momentarily crushed.

"John, please let me see him"

He huffs, exhaling a long drawn out breath

"John - please…"

His large palm flies up, thick in callously much like Robin's, surely having enough strength to snap a man's neck should he wish, and it silences Regina, like a mute hand maid, she stalls, stammers and bites down on her lip.

"You left him"

Her blood ices, a licking of shame rolling through at the three simple, devastatingly accurate words. Focusing down on her hands that clutch together in front of her corset, the attempt to clear her throat is rather feeble, her words coming out slightly choked as she tried so explain "He gave me no choice"

"That shouldn't have mattered"

"John..."

"No.." His tone hard as he cuts her off once more "...I may not know what is going on between you and Robin..." his lips purse behind the thickness of the chocolate burgundy beard "and I understand that to speak to you like this, could be considered inappropriate…" Regina flushes at that, a budding of embarrassment that in this moment she is being chastised like a child though she is the Queen "...but Robin is my brother, he is my family and if you want to be a part of my family, there is one thing you need to understand..."

A tense breath passes between the two as John's arms cross over his burly chest, Regina miming the almost opposite as her shoulders fall slightly.

"You never leave family behind"

Guilt. That's all she feels, shameful, heated guilt that bubbles from the pit of her stomach and sweats on her skin. She did leave him, exposed and alone when she damn well knew he was walking in blind. She _knew_ and let her feelings of disappointment dictate her decisions rather than using her head.

"I'm Sorry"

It's barely above a noticeable octave, her sad apology, and she has no idea what else to say, finding it increasingly difficult to keep the brimming of tears off her eyelashes.

"Can you heal him?"

Her eyes dart up to meet his, the anger once there now on a light simmer, instead desperation swirls for a moment, until she nods, a shaky _I'll try_ following, and John moves, slowly with a frown towards the Queen, and it's more than she can hope for. After this, after leaving their leader to apparently be bludgeoned, she is damn certain they Merry Men, aren't going to be so _Merry_ towards her now.

..

...

..

Her heart plummets, thick in her chest, knocking furiously as she takes in Robin's form, bruised and bloodied as he lays on the bed, the burning of tears lining her eyes as her thief groans heavily from the mosaic of bruises and bones that are surely broken. It's without thought, she moves to his side, giving little notice to the three other men that eye her with trepidation, focusing instead on carding back sweat ridden blonde hair from his face, aching at the dried blood along his forehead, that drips down his temple, staining the skin and stubble below.

"Let's give Robin some air" Tuck breathes heavily, settling down on Robin's other side, though his comment does have the room slowly evacuating, leaving just the Queen and the priest behind.

She knows he is watching her, but she can't meet his eyes, not like this, when her vision is blurred by tears, her hands shaking uncontrollably as she laces her fingers into Robin's, tugging his hand up to meet her lips. And she revels in the warmth his palm has, the soothing balm he doesn't know he provides. Regina sits in regret, shame filled remorse at the laboured breathing of Robin. She watches as Tuck begins to smooth away the blood, a cold wet cloth pressing to her thief's hairline, swiping methodically back and forth, the reddening of the cloth, has Regina's stomach churning in knots. His neck has a purpling bruise mirroring fingerprints around his trachea, small cuts on his arms, his right eye swelling closed, lower lip split, his hand not held by Regina has noticeably disjointed joints.

She did this, she let him be like this, look like this, be subjected to this. Her eyes burn alongside her heart, she is to blame for how rattling his breath his, the fact he is lying unconscious, it's her fault. She should have stayed, regardless of what her emotions were screaming, she should have stayed….you don't abandon family….. _are they family?_

The question stills her, abruptly halting the inhale she pulled….are they family….technically she supposes not….there is no wedding band on her fingers, it's far too early for that….she is not Roland's mother, they have no legal ties to one another...but are they family still? She loves him like family, has loved him as though they have always been tethered together, for years, in the silence of her soul, she's kept him there. But just because she loves him, does that give some sort of ownership to him, a pedestal or right to link them together.

"Regina? ….Your Majesty?"

The old man's timbered voice shakes her back from her thoughts, "Can you heal some of his wounds?"

 _Right, that's why she is here….to heal him….to save him…..not that he would have needed saving if she was there in the first place._

Nodding, her hand rests on his chest, feeling the beating on his heart below. She adjusts her body, pulling Robin's hand she still holds to her own heartbeat, closing her eyes, breathing as deep as she can, waiting till she matches his rhythm. Her magic pulses, waves of golden shimmer that soak into Robin's skin. Centering, she feels the bruises unclot, bleeding slowly back into his veins, broken skin stitching back together unharmed...bones are always harder….and she has to force back the twinge of exhaustion at exerting her magic like this.

She wants him to wake up, open his bright blue eyes, have him smile and call her name. Wants to watch as he hugs Roland, laughing like the sun alongside his boy. That what she wants. That's what she needs to focus on as the bones in his arm and hand jutt and jar back in place - two errand ribs popping in proper alignment once more.

He breaths are steady, less rattled and anguished now as her magic begins to siphon away, clearing up the last few scrapes and cuts before it eventually waves off.

She will not cry, not here, not now, not in front of Tuck, who she can feel is burning holes from his gaze on her. Her shame is thick, suffocatingly so, the air in the room far to warm to want to breathe in, regardless, Robin needs it more, deserves it more. She feels horrid, listening to Robin breathe, her hand rising and falling gently on his chest, but it's not soothing anymore. She felt how close he was to death, how thoroughly his body had been abused, and what if they were too late, what if she couldn't have saved him...what would she have told everyone...what about Roland?

"Thank You"

It's not a smile she gives back, more of a half sob before she flees from the room.

..

...

..

She watches as the sun rises, painting the skies in brilliant orange and reds, another day ready to thrive, but thriving is the last thing she feels like doing, curling up in a hole and isolating herself completely off, sounds more in tune with her heart right now. Her fingers wrap tight around the handle of her mirror, his dark room illuminated in the reflection, allowing Regina to keep an eye on his recovery from afar. She did what they asked, healed what she could and then she vanished. They will take care of him, his men, his family - there is no further need for her to be around, even if all she wishes to do is curl into his side and let the day melt away.

The mirror works though, she can hear him still breathing, see his face nearly void of anguished lines, smiled sadly as John brought a very sleepy Roland into the room who immediately clambered up beside his father, a mop of curly brown hair stuffed in as tight as possible. She could do it, live like this instead, without them, probably should in truth …. It wouldn't be the first time she used magic to linger on a life long forgotten with Robin.

Maybe she should leave for Maleficent's castle, spend her days in the dark forest alone, quietly letting years go by.

Wiping away the fallen few tears, her hands grip hard on the iron balcony bar, the warmth of the sun hitting her skin as she sighs heavily..

"Hello!"

Her heart stops in the same beat her magic pulses in her hands, the iron bar melting away...and she is falling, her stomach dropping, quelling and sinking as her feet lose their balance on the ledge and she falls, plummeting to the ground below. She screams, at least she thinks she does as the concrete approaches...and it will be swift, surely, her death.

Her eyes close, body tenses waiting for the impact...but it never comes, in fact it feels the opposite of falling suddenly as though she is being suspended in the air, hovering mere feet away from the courtyard.

Cracking her eyes open, a red glow surrounds her body as the horizon comes back into view, and she is floating...flying...not this is definitely floating, upwards...the ground below is distancing farther and farther away, till her feet hit the stone of her balcony, the balcony she just fell from…

"Oh my gosh, I am so sorry!"

Regina stills as the red magic disappears, staring suddenly at a curly hair brunette woman, with skin the color of dark caramel, warm and rather alarmed chocolate brown eyes, all donned in red, a light shimmer about her body.

"Are you alright? I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to scare you...oh my god…" the woman stammers, throwing a hand in front of her face in horror as Regina gapes at the strange intruder, still too stunned from nearly dying, to figure out what to say or do. She's rather pretty, this woman, has an odd comfort about her, even though she is continuing to babble out apology after apology.

"Will you stop apologizing, you caught me did you not"

"Oh" the other woman stills "well I am sorry for startling you" she shakes her head "Robin wouldn't have ever forgiven me..."

"Robin?" His name stalls Regina's aching heart, "You know Robin?" her voice shakes more than intended as his broken body swims into her vision. The curly haired brunette smiles gently, crossing her hands softly in front of her red gown, threaded gold patterns adorning the bodice, glowing iridescently, the colors seeming strangely familiar from where Regina has no idea, but there is something, something about the matching hues that pulls deep in her gut.

"I'm sorry" The woman starts again, letting out a small bubbly chuckle as Regina's sighs at the apology again "no, no, not for that...well yes for that...sorry…oh boy, this…."

"Who are you?" Regina interrupts.

"Oh! My name is Rosetta and it's a pleasure to meet you, Your Majesty" she curtsied with a little bounce, the chocolate ringlets jostling around.

"Regina, is fine"

"Regina"

"How do you know Robin?"

"Oh!" she laughs, settling down on the chaise, patting the space beside her. It's not often Regina feels stunned, amused in fact at how this woman has zero fear of her, knows who she is and yet is beaming up at her as though she is ready to pour them each a glass of wine and gossip about boys. "I met Robin a long time ago, his wife had just passed away, and the poor guy was in such a rut, I just simply had to help him"

"Help him how?" she questions, sitting down straight spined on the chaise with an arched eyebrow.

Rosette grins, leaning over into Regina's space, who immediately backs away a touch, personal space still required and all "He needed to find love again". Her heart skips a beat, a fluttering of butterflies swirling in her stomach though her mask remains unfazed. "It was really sad honestly, how low the chap was, it was affecting everything and everyone. So what with me being a fairy and all…" a sparkle of red magic glitters from her hands "I gave him some pixie dust to help".

Ah. So it is pixie dust. He has a soul mate out there, waiting to be found. Turning away from the fairy, she stares out into the sky, connecting stars as her brain buzzes and fogs over with a life that can't ever be real. She will lose him and Roland, and everything that has saved her from the darkness of this world.

"However, I'm rather surprised he hasn't used it yet…"

The comment hangs between them, thick and coy as Regina tries to remain nonchalant, knowing she is failing horribly as Rosetta chuckles in a silly melodious giggle. "I have to wonder if he has found someone else."

When she turns, it's to find a bright smile beaming back at her, in front of eyes that see far too much, know far too much.

She tries to smile back but it catches in her throat, giving way to a choked mumbled, "He deserves to be happy", and Rosetta nods, humming to herself as golden glitter flutters around them.

"He looks happy to me. Seems he didn't need the help...not when he's found his happiness on his own"

"Has he?"

"You tell me, are you both happy?"

Her eyes go wide, jaw dropping as she gapes at Rosetta who simply smiles back softly, reaching to grab Regina's hand with a light pat. "It's alright, Your Majesty. I know when I see love, and Robin is most certainly in love, and if my eyes don't deceive me, the same goes for you"

The nod is involuntary, followed by a small breathless rather sad chuckle, "He has a soul mate out there"

"What makes you think it's not you?"

Regina sighs, biting down on her lip as her heart rolls over, tight and constricting "It can't be me"

"Why?" Rosetta probe's, shifting slightly to catch Regina's stormy eyes.

"Villains don't get happy endings"

"Are you a villain?"

The question stills the Queen as she scowls out into the distance once more. She doesn't want to be a villain anymore, never wanted to be one in the first place, but here she is...the infamous Evil Queen, once again struck down by cruel fate. But it doesn't matter what she wants, or what she does to change, who she loses, be it her son, or Robin again, love is not for her, it can't be.

"I think Robin knows exactly what he is doing, you just need to give him a chance"

"He deserves better than me. He deserves his soul mate. I want that for him. To find his happy ending. I love him enough to let him go" … _again._

..

….

..

It's a small knock at her door that interrupts the quiet stewing of her mind. Her conversation with Rosetta left Regina feeling more than uncertain, incredibly confused and irritatingly hopeful that maybe the pixie dust could actually lead Robin to her...there is a chance she supposes, granted a small, tiny, more than likely not type of chance, but it's a chance. Settling her mirror down from where she had been watching Robin sleep soundly thank god, her bare feet pad quietly along to stone floor.

She expects it to be Snow, or Charming, or someone else equally annoying, here to pester her about something she really could care less about. However, Little John was the last person she expected to have standing at her door at this hour, their last encounter was less than pleasant, and the guilt that had been simmering low, boils with new rigor at the sight of the burly man.

"I apologize for the bother your majesty, but - "

"Gina!"

Her legs are suddenly caught by two small arms and a warm body plastered to her thighs. She hears John chuckle, as she turns down to find Roland beaming up at her, all toothy and dimpled behind the wildling of curls, and she melts, bending down to scoop him up at the same time his arms reach for her. He tucks into her neck, little fingers patting on her collarbone with a happy hum as she turns back to John who is still standing in her doorway. His eyes are sad, happy but sad, a touch apprehensive maybe as he twiddles his large thumbs around in circles. "He refuses to sleep" John mumbles, running a big hand over his face, and he looks bloody tired, ready to crawl into hibernation for lord knows how long.

"Daddy got hurt" Roland sniffs, his eyes suddenly pilfered with thick tears, reddening his chubby cheeks and hiding the dimples that make her heart glow.

She tries to hide the flicker of pain on her face though it crashes through her at Roland's little whimper, his big brown chocolate eyes drilling holes into Regina's own, the knot in her stomach tightens at his confusion, the inability to understand anything except _Daddy is hurt_ , the ache deep set in her core, bubbling alongside the guilt that refuses to seep away. Curling him into her body, she sways gently side to side, pressing a soft kiss into his curly hair, mumbling quietly that his papa will be fine, she promises.

Whether it mollifies Roland or not, she can't tell from this angle, though her skin feels oddly wet from tiny tear droplets.

"I'll come for him in the morning" John hushes out, tiredly nodding to the pair before ruffling Roland's hair with a silly grin, bidding the youngest merry man a good night, to which Roland muffles the same, before tucking himself back into the long draping curls that hang over Regina's shoulder.

It's been many many years since Regina has had to soothe someone this young, her only real experience was with Henry, and she adored it. Every second he would creak her master bedroom door open, silently pad over and poke her nose with a baby whisper of _Mommy_ , his tiny hands patting her cheeks till she roused, smiled and without question lifted the thick duvet so her little prince could climb in, snuggle into her warmth and be out in dream land not 3 minutes later. It's a bittersweet memory that clings to her as she sits down on the bed with Roland, leaning into the padded headboard and drawing the blankets up around his little body. He's slack in her arms, burrowed as close as possible, a palm just about her heart, the other clutching a thick curl, and she rocks back and forth gently, rubbing absent circles into his back as the fat tears plop onto her night gown.

Minutes lull by as Regina continues to ease Roland's pain, mumbling thousands of promises that his daddy will be just fine, _you and he will be out riding horses again soon, and maybe we can all go to the lake again? Just you me and your daddy...would you like that baby?_

He nods, wiping a snotty nose on his sleeve, and curls back down, the rattled breaths of before seeming to calm down as Regina begins to hum softly into his hair.

"Sing the words Gina" Roland whispers into her skin, warm and soft as his small arms wrap around her neck. She stills for a second….she has never sang to anyone, anyone but Henry, when he was little, just like this. He used to say he liked the sound of her voice in her chest, like her heart was talking to him, he'd giggling over how it would rumble and vibrate against his ear that pressed into her.

She hasn't sang to anyone but herself in years now….

"Gina?"

Swallowing down the flicker of anguish, she sinks into the pillows a touch more, running a hand through Roland's curls as she starts quietly,

"There's a whole other conversation going on, in a parallel universe. Where nothing breaks and nothing hurts"

…her eyes finding the mirror on the bedside table where Robins sleeping form breathes peacefully.

"There's a waltz playing frozen in time, blades of grass on tiny bare feet" she smiles as the giggling of Roland and her hands tickle his bare toes "I look at you and you're looking at me"

Her eyes close, "would you beam me up, give me a minute, I don't know what I'd say in it" - her heart tightens as Henry's face swims in "I'd probably just stare, happy just to be there holding your face".

Just one more time, to brush back his hair, see his hazel green eyes smiling up at her as he calls her mom….just once more...

"Can you beam me up, let me feel lighter…" she rests her cheek on Roland's head, inhaling the baby powder and leafy smell of his hair "I'm tired of being a fighter, I think a minute would be enough…" She brushes away a solo tear "just beam me up".

The room goes quiet for a second, Regina fighting back the tears in her eyes as she hugs Roland back to her now, revelling in his warmth, the little light he brings when things are so dark right now.

"Gina?"

"Yes baby?"

"Did you meet my mama ever?"

..

….

 ****Flashback****

….

..

He's at a loss for what to do, none of the Friars have anything more to offer for help, nothing that could take away this god forsaken illness that bleeds the life out of his Marian. She is ashen now, shaky rattled water filled breaths that ache Robin's own lungs, her body losing all of its strength and muscle, leaving the bones protruding instead. Even her hair is brittle and dry as his fingers thread through it, the once cool cloth warms almost instantly to the heat that radiates off her. She is freezing, and yet overheating all at once, wrapped in blankets as she shivers, even with sweat pooling on her brow.

Two months, eight awful weeks he has sat beside her in this cot, holding her thinning hand to his lips, silently begging the Gods to bring her back, to let this nightmare be over, they have a child for Christ sake, a boy that isn't even a year yet. He will grow up never knowing his own mother and there isn't a damn thing Robin can do about it, and the hatred that blooms inside is drowning.

He is going to lose his wife.

He's going to have to raise his son without her.

The Dark One's wand did nothing but stall the illness till Roland was born, ever since then, it has claimed her body and soul with renewed greed, sucking out the brightness of her eyes with each passing morning. And he watches, day after day- her body slowly giving out...a year ago she was riding beside him, full blown and lively...then her arms had become too weak to hold the reins...so they walked together, till her legs gave out beneath and she was forced to lay in the back of a carriage like cargo and now Robin watches as the smallest inhale of breath seems to drain her.

There is nothing he can do.

Gone is the fullness of her curly hair, the sparkle of her eyes, and the sun kissed color of her skin.

He knows what death looks like, how it feels, the smell…

The Friars haven't given them a time frame, they didn't really know truthfully. How many more days...or weeks possibly….if he is lucky to have with his wife. They tell him they will pray for her, and he is desperate to keep her, but she is in pain, brittled agony that no milk of the poppy can sedate out, and the guilt swims inside his gut. He wants her to stay, but this is no life for her to live, it's selfish in a horrid consuming way, but he loves his wife, and she is dying in front of him, and he feels utterly useless.

"Robin?"

He clenches at the tightness in her voice, graveled as she swallows against the parched desert of her throat, he does his best to smile, a smile that doesn't reach his eyes, but he has to try for her. He's terrified of what will happen when she doesn't wake...what will that morning be like when he goes to kiss the apple of her cheek and finds it deathly cold.

"You'll be fine you know"

Marian's thumb runs barely along the back of Robin's palm, using the entirety of her strength to give him something, something that could put his soul at ease, a bandaid for the cracking in his heart she see's so vividly through the foggy haze of her illness. She is dying, she knows she is dying, and this time there is no magical cure, nothing her beloved thief can steal to bring her back, this is the end.

He shakes his head, sniffling hard, thwarting back the hot tears that threaten to fall. "I'll fix this, I promise", it's a trembled half mumbled huff into her hand "I'm not letting you go, I can't".

"I love you"

"Marian please, please don't say that"

"Look at me"

He can't, but does anyway, crumbling at the dulled mud brown of her eyes as she tries to placate him with a beautiful smile, he is going to miss her smile, "There is nothing you can do this time"

"You don't know-"

"I do"

Her palm his shaky against his stubbled cheek, clammy and wet but Robin can bear to do nothing but lean into it, soaking in every last bit of her; "I loved you since the day you stole my horse, irritated as my father was, I just knew when I looked at you, you felt like home". A tear streams out of the corner of her eye, her body to weak to do wipe it away, so Robin does it for her, leaning over to rest his forehead against the crook of her neck.

"What am I to do without you?"

"Take care of our son, be happy…"

"I can't. Not without you"

"You'll find a way"

He shakes his head, hiding his own tears from his wife who runs a hand up his back, cradling him in tight as her lips press softly into his hair. She is wrong. There is no happiness in this life, not anymore. He has lost too much, has loved far too hard, and has had it stripped away each time.

..

...

..

There is a fire in the hearth beside her, a thick fur blanket draped across her legs, but Regina is cold as ice, frozen as she watches _him_ say good bye to his wife. It's a pain all too familiar. Loss. Losing someone you love. Over and over again. He doesn't deserve this, to hold his wife as she barely breathes, knowing that at some point there isn't going to be another breath.

It feels like that night in the stables, when her entire world crashed and burned. She held Daniel for what seemed to be an eternity, begging him to come back to her, praying that it was all a nightmare and she would wake up and he would be there beside her. Mother had pulled her away, snapped and barked in disappointment as her dead fiance lay not three feet behind. It was later she had gone back, under the cloak of night, and he was still there, laying peacefully asleep though his heart was not beating. He was heavy, cumbersomely so as she tugged him up into her lap, her fingers picking absent straw from his perfect sandy blonde hair as she cried silently, tracing the lines of Daniel's face till they were burned into her memory.

The scene in her mirror is deja-vu, Robin threading his fingers through Marian's long waves, asking her to not leave him, sobbing quietly at the complete unfairness, the cruel hand life is dealing him. And Regina aches as she watches it, down to the bottom of her heart, a vice constriction around her chest.

Two weeks ago she'd heard of his whereabouts, it had been nearly 6 months since she had seen him last, had saved his wife from the foul creatures that were her guards; his band of outlaws had pilfered King Midas's carriages, stealing bundles of food and gold, enough she is certain to feed an entire village for the winter that fast approaches.

She knew she shouldn't have asked the Genie to find them in his mirror, knew that it would only bring her heartbreak to see him playing family, living his happily ever after; but apparently she is a leach for pain. She expected so to him smiling, to hear him laughing and kissing his wife...that was the pain she'd prepared herself for. But it is nothing compared to the torture of seeing his bright blue eyes storming with sadness as he pulled back the flap of a small tent, a tiny bundle of baby in his arms as he settled quietly down onto a cot, beside his wife who didn't even budge….that was pain Regina has never felt.

She's been watching for hours as Robin sways his child in his arms, whispering out sorrow filled plea's to Marian who was all too vividly dying of illness before he settling the child between them, a mop of curly brown hair sandwich between his parents; one who cried without the other even knowing.

There is illness sweeping across the entire kingdom, news of hundreds dying from the plague, and no cure in sight. As much as she detests being Queen, she is still just that, the Monarch that rules, and even if she is the _Evil Queen_ , it's unsettling having this disease run rampant.

 _"_ _What am I to do without you?"_

 _"_ _Take care of our son, be happy…"_

 _"_ _I can't. Not without you"_

 _"_ _You'll find a way"_

It's awful, watching him say goodbye to his wife, her fingers wiping away fresh fallen tears that chill on her skin. He's supposed to be happy, to be living his happily ever after, it's why she sent him away in the first place, had saved him time and time again, one of them deserves to be happy, but this makes it feel like none of it was worth it. Rumple had said it was a disease of the lungs, water that filled and suffocated its victim, rendering them incapable of breathing, slowly draining life out. She hates water, the fear of her mother's punishments branded forever in her mind.

Drowning, that horrid gripping of pain in her chest as she fought against magic she didn't understand below the lake's surface, thrashing and kicking though she moved nowhere but further down. It was to teach her a lesson, once for missing tea time, another for talking back, the third time, she nearly died, had felt her brain begin to fuzz out, when mother found her and daniel out late by fire fly hill. It would have been easier to die then. To not have had to live this life of utter turmoil and self hatred. Simple at 15 years old to have never inhaled another breath.

Marian's coughing drags her eyes back to the illuminated reflection, a harsh rasping that is soaked into her bones, Robin flinches, moving his palm to rest over her chest, rubbing small soothing circles as she passes out again. She can see his tears, thick as they fall from his eyes silently, his tight burdening plea for her not to leave him...

She could try...granted healing magic isn't her forte, but she knows enough, has read enough that it could be worth a shot. A flicker of shame runs up her spine at the thought, the Evil Queen doesn't heal anyone, is supposed to be focused on Snow White and her revenge...it would be ludicrous for her to simply waltz into an unsuspecting tented village to heal a single peasant woman. Her stomach clenches in knots, she hates this part of herself, playing this villainous horrid person. It's tiring, and she is so goddamn tired of it all.

The baby between them begins to cry, a soft whimper that is utterly beautiful to her. Children, the one thing that is true and pure in this world. This little baby is going to grow up without a mother, will live a life missing a key puzzle, and from what Regina has seen, Marian is would have been a wonderful mother, would have loved her child like the sun and stars. So completely different to the mother Regina has...or had. She's not actually even sure what her mother is doing in Wonderland right now, no doubt stewing over being banished there years ago.

Huffing at the thought of Cora, Regina sits up, shaking away the rest of her tears, she grew up not knowing a mother's love, but this child, they will, she will make certain of it. With a quick flick of her wrist, her appearance is gone, fading back to give way to a simply dressed stranger. This is better, no one will give thought or a second glance at her now.

..

...

Well it's no wonder everyone is sick, it's bloody freezing outside. Thank god she had the good sense to wear a thick cloak. It's quiet in the camp as she walks through it, doing her best to not look anyone in the eye as they crowd around small fires, but she hears their conversations, the sad mumbling over the loss of a fourth person in their camp. All the damn tents look the same too, it's rather irritating as she walks past them, her heart hammering at the thought of Robin being so close. What if he recognizes her? It's impossible, given that she is a blonde curly haired, green eyed, unsuspecting female...but there is still a lick of anxiety...or excitement that bubbles in her.

"John, have you seen Robin?"

She stills, turning ever so slightly to see an older man, most likely a friar calling out to a burly bearded companion.

"He's with Marian"

The older man sighed, hanging his head low as he settles down by the fire.

"She's not doing well"

"I know, and there is nothing I can do either"

"It's not your fault Tuck. This illness is...terrible"

Regina grimaces, her hands trembling slightly as she listens to them. It's palpable, the anguish in this camp, is traced on every face she passes, a dark looming cloud over everyone. Moving around them, she walks between a few tents, praying she hears him. It will be easy enough, she can put Robin to sleep for a few minutes and heal Marian...or at least she hopes that will work.

It's growing late, the fires around her dying out as people trail off into their respective tents, and she still hasn't found Robin yet and panic begins to set in. Every hour she loses, is another hour Marian inches to death.

Leaning against the trunk of a thick oak, she takes a moment just to breath, closing her eyes in an attempt to slow the thumping of her heart.

"Miss, are you alright?"

Oh God.

She freezes, her entire body rooted to the spot at the sound of his voice, the voice she can hear when she closes her eyes at night, the one timbered tone that follows her around everyday.

"Miss?"

His hand is warm on her forearm, a pulse of electricity licking through her veins as she exhales heavy, tears lining her eyes at the familiar sensation, pure and gentle... she has missed it so much, missed him.

..

...

They are bright blue, perfect and gazing at her with sincere worried intensity. There is a speckling of lighter blonde hair on his temple, small laugh lines around his eyes, the sandy color of his hair blending into a darker tone in the stubble that frames his face.

He is so handsome.

Her heart lurches in her chest as she takes him in for the first time in what seems like decades. It's a fight, a war inside her soul to still the urge to throw her arms around his neck, to hug him tight enough to absorb his body entirely into her own, she wants to lose, could do it easily, just hold him for a bittersweet second.

It's him.

Her Robin.

Well not _her's_ she swallows thickly, he has a wife, it's why she is here.

"I'm fine thank you" she manages, slowly pulling her arm away from his hand, the loss of his contact painfully cold as she laces her fingers together on her stomach.

"Can I help you with something?" Robin smiles gently.

She wasn't really supposed to talk to him, but it feels so good, so ungodly painfully right to be standing a foot away from him hearing him actually speak to her, has her stomach fluttering around ridiculously, giving rise to a rogue flush on her skin that is god help her, hopefully hidden from his gaze.

"I've not seen you around here before"

"I'm just passing through".

She wants to stay, so so terribly.

He nods "I see. Well it's rather cold tonight, do you have somewhere warm for the night?"

What if she never went back? The thought pushes into her mind. She could do it, decide to never return to her dungeon of a castle, opt to spend the rest of her life like this, cloaked as a stranger in his camp. See him everyday, maybe become a friend again...

"M'lady?"

Her dream vanishes as quickly as it came, she can't stay, her heart she can leave behind, but she is the Queen, and Snow White is still out there. It's a strange twinge in her brain, the one thing that has kept her waking up each day suddenly feels so irrelevant, insignificant, almost discardable.

"Yes. thank you" She lies, having no intention of staying, the longer she does the harder it will be to leave him later.

Robin smiles one more time, that dimpled kind smile, before bidding her a soft good night, and she watches him go, see's the tent he enters and that's it. She found him, she can do this, she can save his wife and wipe away that sad look in his perfect eyes.

He will have his happy ending, if it is the last thing she does.

Minutes drift by as she moves away from the tree, hoping that he is sleeping soundly enough by now to not hear her approaching. Sweat trickles down her back, a niggling fear as her hand lifts just slightly, enough that she can extend out a plume of invisible magic against the fabric of the tent, letting it simmer quietly before it dissolves.

He should be asleep now. A magically induced slumber till she is done.

Exhaling a shaky breath, she pulls the flap of the tent back, moving inside quickly. She feels like an intruder as she see's the little family all tucked in together. The little bundled baby asleep in a cocoon of blankets beside the higher cot.

Nerves wrack through her, suddenly terrified as she shifts closer to the bed, avoiding waking the baby, focusing rather on seeing Robin's arm draped around Marian's abdomen, his face buried into the pillow next to her face, breathing deep and heavy into her hair.

The contrast in their skin color is stark, where he is golden kissed by the sun, Marian is ashen gray, dark purple circles under her eyes, she looks waxy with sunken in cheekbones and dry pale lips. Her stomach turns, rolls over as her palm ghosts above Marian's heart, feeling the barely there flicker of a beat, if she doesn't do something now, it will be too late. Marian's skin is hot, wet from sweat, yet covered in goosebumps, chilled and freezing her from the inside out.

Sludge, swampy and thick. She can feel how Marian's lungs rattle and shake against heaviness of the water inside as her palms press into her chest, the disease latching onto Regina's hands like tiny pin pricks, sharp and irritating.

Disease is greedy. Spreads out to bury into any living cell it can find. She can feel it.

It's a gamble, there is no cure for the illness, except as it appears to pull it straight out of Marians body and absorb it into her own, and by the gods above hope that Rumple will have a smidge of mercy and heal her himself.

She glances towards Robin, brushes a lock of fallen hair from his brow, smoothes down the slope of his jaw to cradle his cheek. Peaceful. He looks peaceful. Sleeping as though he hasn't in years, the deep set worry lines eased away. She wants him to always look like this, void of anguish, volatile illness be damned.

Focusing on his breathing, she turns back to Marian, her magic bubbling at her fingertips as she sinks into the woman's chest, into the wet sodden cavern of her lungs and Regina pulls. Tears at the sickness that clings to tissue, sucks it out from riddled blood cells. It leaches into her own body, oozing in like thick tar.

It's scalding, a heavy brick stone hitting her stomach, vaulting the urge to vomit into her throat, and it burns, the taste of bile, acidic in her mouth. Her eyes water as she clamps them down shut, her hands soaking in the infection as she reaches further in, scraping it away inch by inch, her hair sticking to her forehead as she begins to sweat; whether from the malady infecting her body, or magical exhaustion, she isn't quite sure, but everything is going a touch fuzzy now.

The cough is involuntary, but her throat is filled with mucous, and the second she grimaces she hears the baby beside her stir, whimper slightly and she waits, with her heart thundering, waits for it to start wailing and screaming, rouse the entire camp who will come into find her elbows deep (literally) into Marian's chest….not exactly an easy explanation to give. Shifting minutely, her eyes catch a small hand, five chubby fingers that stretch and curl, and then silence.

She sends a silent thank you into the air before turning back to Marian, who miraculously is breathing with a fraction of better ease, though Regina's is faring far worse. Health for Illness, the switch is palpable, her body feeling egregiously heavy, to the core of her bones that are beginning to ache. Just a little bit longer, it's almost gone, Marian is almost free.

It's taking to long though, her sleeping spell wearing off on Robin who has begun to grumble and stir in his sleep. Her magic pulses hard into Marian's body, firing through every diseased cell Regina can find, gripping at it hard and pulling with every ounce of strength that is quickly failing her.

Just two more minutes…

Robin coughs, his eyes slowly beginning to blink, he will see her if she doesn't move now...but she is so close, so and she panics, swallowing the last bit of fever she has a hold on, vanishing as she see's his blue eyes crack open, sleep hazed and completely unaware of her fading presence.

..

...

He thought it was a miracle, Marian had begun to heal, to fight back against the disease that was taking her away. She was breathing again, full bodied breathes, smiling like the sun once more, even had enough energy to join Robin for breakfast for three whole days.

But miracles don't exist, not in this world. She flourished and then broke. Three days he got to feel a flicker of hope, three days of listening to her voice, strong and solid...and three days ended. Abruptly so. He'd left her just after breakfast, his heart thrumming with life...he'd returned to her not an hour later, and she was gone.

No miracles don't exist, they simply toy with the strings of the heart before severing them completely.

Marian is gone.

His wife is gone.

Someone asked about the woman in the camp, the strange blonde that was here one night and gone the next, but Robin pays no mind to it, only curses the illness that tore his family apart. Some absent female isn't important, there isn't much that he can find important anymore.

It's not till a week later he hears it through mumbled conversations, his fragile bleeding heart breaks...

The Queen is ill.

..

...

 ****Present Time****

…

..

The memory washes away, that lingering recollection of how close to death she was. A month of bed rest, hours of nearly begging Rumple to heal her, listening to his annoying slimy giggle as she coughed and sputtered. The feeling of water absorbing into her lungs is tangible, the weakness in her muscle, fragility of her bones, fuzz of her mind. It was the longest 30 days of her life, weak and vulnerable. But Robin would have his family, his wife would be okay.

Roland tucks further down into her chest, snuggling in tighter as sleep begins to invade. She wonders how long it was before Marian had passed, knows she died of the disease anyway, but hopefully they got to have another few years together, to be a family.

A family she has lost before she even could grasp onto. Henry is gone, she will never see her boy again, it's a shame she doesn't have a sleeping curse with her, one to put her into eternal sleep. With a heavy sigh she settles down further into the blankets, her heart aching heavy as her hands rub small circles into Roland's back. Tomorrow will be better, it will have to be better, anything would be better than today.

A small knock on her door, pulls her back from the edge of sleep, a beam of light parting into the room.

"Hey"

She steals, swallowing a heavy breath as he walks into the room, looking beyond tired, a slight limp as he closes the distance to the bed, but he smiles, exhausted, but it's there as he sits down, the mattress sagging beneath his weight.

"He's out cold"

Smiling, she glances down to her sleepy bed buddy, toying with a curl, murmuring a quiet _yeah_ back.

"Are you alright?"

"Why would you ask me that?"

"Well" Robin sighs, reaching to grasp her hand, thumbing across the back of her hand, "I kind of expected you to be there when I woke up" he catches her eyes sheepishly "and Little John said you and he got into somewhat of a tiff over my...state"

"I'm sorry"

The tears burn the back of her eyes. It's agonizing, like this, sitting here with Robin who just a few hours ago was a breath away from death, is now here trying to console her. They can't do this; she can't do this. Put him in danger day after day. It's not worth the fear that chases her every minute, waiting for it to all come crashing down.

Another life lost, another love gone.

"Robin"

He shifts closer, lacing their fingers together.

"We need to talk"

"About what my love?"

Swallowing thick against the lump in her chest at his sentiment, her smile breaks giving out to a trembling lower lip as she turns to find his eyes, knowing this will be the last time she gets a chance to look at him this way; to love him this way, but he deserves his happy ending.

She can give it to him.

"This"

Her hand twists, a plume of purple smoke fading away to leave a small glass vial, red and glowing in her palm, warm and tingling against her hand. Her mask breaks at his slight gasp, the frown that etches across his face and clouds his eyes as he stares down at the pixie dust, the tears welling and creeping out of her eyes as he reaches to take the vial from her.

"You need to find your happy ending Robin...and it's not with me"

..

...

..


	15. Chapter 15

How she found the pixie dust, he isn't entirely sure, is caught between being oddly fond of her little theft, and concerned she was fishing through his things. Not that it matters now. The words she just dropped, hushed as so not to wake up Roland are far more important than where she found it.

He needs to find his "happy ending" and she doesn't believe it's with her. How she could possibly even fathom that notion is beyond him.

He loves her. Since the day he saw her. All sunlight hugged by the lake, sniffling back thick tears behind a shy smile. His heart was hers. Is hers. So why on earth she is holding this damn pixie dust in her slender fingers, proclaiming such as she eyes him sadly, with his son tucked between them is utterly absurd.

He's dumbfounded. Stunned. Bewildered. His heart hammering in his chest as she presses the cold vial into his palm, holding his hand for a fraction of a second before letting go with a gentle squeeze and locking her hands into her own lap, fiddling with the hem of her night dress.

He hates it.

Not touching her, and this space she's suddenly created. But even more than that, he hates this stupid vial of red glitter. Declaring that there is someone else out there for him.

Because there isn't.

He doesn't want anyone else.

He wants her.

All of her.

Any part of her.

"Regina," he breathes, settling the vial aside and reaching for her hands instead.

"Robin, it's okay."

What's okay? What on God's green earth is alright with this? He scowls at her. What could possibly be fine in this situation?

She is giving up on them.

After decades of back and forth longing, losing, and finally finding each other, she is just going to throw it all away for some ridiculous bobble of dust? He should have thrown it away the moment that damn fairy thrusted it at him. He never wanted it anyway. Hadn't begged or asked for the Gods above to bestow something like it upon him. He was just in pain over losing Marian. Just needed a moment to breathe for Christ Sake.

"I want you to be happy."

"I am happy, Regina. With you."

She smiles, half heartedly, drops her gaze from his, focusing on their entwined hands instead. Heat burns the back of her eyes, lining thickly along her lashes as she plays with his knuckles, knowing that this will be the last time she can hold him, feel the callouses that line his skin, the soft scars that etch sporadically along his forearm, and up to his tattoo.

She likes it. His tattoo.

Remembers fondly how she had shown him her own marking that mother hated the first time they met, and how his fingers grazed along it's darker edges, sparking her skin. It was the first time someone had actually admired it rather than stare disdainfully down at it's misshapen pattern.

"Are you not happy? Have I done something wrong? Earlier with my sister, I apologize for leaving you—" He begins to ramble, desperate to amend this sudden fracture between them but she is quick to cut him off.

"Robin. Stop. It's not you. It's... " Well this couldn't be more cliche, it's not you it's me, those words are most certainly not going to be said. But what words to use is where she falls short, resorts to chewing down on her lower lip instead.

"Then what is it?" He begs through a hushed whisper, cupping her face in his hands, pleading with bright blue eyes that she give him some sort of inclination of how to fix this. Between them Roland shifts, gruffs in his sleep and sinks back into the space closer to Regina, who simply combs through his hair, soothing away whatever troubles his dreams.

No.

He is not going to lose her. Refuses to let his son lose her either. He gathers her hands into his own, lifting them to his lips, and presses kiss after kiss into her soft palms, moving to hold them to his cheeks, forcing her to touch him, to cradle him, to do something other than just sit there watching with a bittersweet smile.

This is not going to be it.

He is going to prove to her, that he doesn't give two shits for whomever the pixie dust may or may not lead him too. Prophecy and destiny be damned. He'll choose his own.

She runs her thumbs along his stubbled cheek bones, swallowing down the urge to cry at the desperation in his face. She opts to shift, unable to linger on the pain in his eyes, moving her hands out of his for it's too easy to just let him hold her, and though he follows for a second, she does let go, and grabs the magic vial.

It's warm in her palm. Golden speckles float aimlessly around. It's oddly enchanting. The ruby and rose swirls, spiraling in the center, a tiny little tornado all it's own.

"This." She twirls the glass container with a shrug. "It's pixie dust, Robin."

"I'm aware."

"You've had it for years."

He nods. Not really understanding how she knows that, but again, that's besides the point right now.

"You know it can lead you to your soulmate right?"

"I don't believe in it."

"In happy endings?"

"I won't put my faith, nor trust my heart to a pile of dust."

"It's pixie dust, Robin."

"It's a crock."

"So you don't want to find your happy ending?"

"No."

She cocks an eyebrow at him, to which he huffs with a shake of his head. "That's not what I meant. Obviously I want to be happy, but Regina... You are what makes me happy."

"But—"

"No, there is none of that." He closes the distance between them quickly, hovering over his boy's sleepy snoring and catches her full on the lips, pressing into her body and coaxing out whatever he can. "Do I make you happy, Regina?" He bumps the tip of her nose with his own.

"Yes." Her answer immediately breathed out in the delicate space between them, followed much to her chagrin, by a creeping of rogue pink blush on her cheeks at his bright, beaming grin.

"Then that's all that matters."

"Robin. It's not that simple."

Well of course it is. He loves her and he is fairly certain she loves him. Roland loves her, and she again reciprocates. So what is the issue? Unless someone said something to her? One of his men? Snow or Charming? Who has decided to potentially ruin the only thing in his world that makes sense. With the confusion of his sister's return, he needs her with him, fiercely so.

"It is, Regina. Why can't you see that?"

She sighs, sliding out from under the heavy covers, quickly tucking them back around Roland who slumbers deep, beautifully unaware of the splicing turmoil between the two people around him. At least one of them can live without a broken heart. Quietly she beckons him to follow as she makes her way to the balcony, letting the chill of the windless night wrap around her, instantly preferring it was Robin's arm wrapping about her and battling away the cold.

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He follows her.

"Regina, you are being ridiculous."

"I'm just trying to do what's best for you."

"You are what's best for me! Why can't you see that?"

"You could find your soulmate, Robin."

She sighs, curling her hands around the cold iron balcony bar, glancing out into the dark sky, finding Roland's self proclaimed constellation on cue. Apparently, if you connect the dots, it looks like a bow and arrow to the young child, though Regina has yet to really see the twinkling picture align. It doesn't matter though, it's his cluster of happy imagination, and it brings her a sense of peace.

"I don't care."

Her eyes shut tight, forcing back the sting of tears. She'd like nothing more than to turn and scream at him. Scream for the fact he is making this so much harder for her to let go. She's done it far too many times. Times he still doesn't know about, and it doesn't get easier. Especially not when it sounds as though he is fighting back his own threatening tears, his voice thick and cracking.

If he just walked away, before she could dig herself in any deeper, perhaps her heart wouldn't feel like it was suffocating.

"Robin, be reasonable. Everyone wants to find their other half."

"Do you?"

She turns to face him, slightly confused, inhaling sharply as he steps into her space, hands running along her frozen arms.

"If this was the other way around, would you leave me for someone you've never met?" He scans her face and finds her eyes "On a whim that some sand is going to make you fall in love?"

"It's not sand, Robin."

"You know what I mean."

She stares at him, biting back the words that are not meant for this moment. If she says them, he won't leave, won't find the person who is supposed to make him happy and whole. He'd stay with her. And while her heart skips and beats erratically at the thought that he may want to, she knows he deserves better than the Evil Queen. He deserves everything.

"I don't want someone else, Regina. I want you."

"Robin. Please."

"I won't love anyone else like I love you."

Her jaw drops as her heart stops beating.

"...What?" His brow rises in question to the change in her tensed grip on his hand he hadn't realized she grabbed in the process of all this.

"You love me?"

"Of course I do." The exasperation painted in his huffed tone and warm grin, as though what she just asked him was the most ridiculous rhetorical question. "Do you not feel the same?"

She does. Obviously, it wouldn't hurt this terribly if she didn't.

He waits, letting her decipher what she needs to say as he tucks a smooth, silky curl behind her ear, cupping at the nape of her neck and pulling her fractionally closer.

"I….Robin, we have such a complicated past."

"So you don't love me?"

"I never said that."

He smiles. That dumb, cheeky, dimpled, irritatingly beautiful smile that has her heart somersaulting for all the best reasons, tugging the corners of her lips up into her own bashful grin, and she could kiss him right now, shouldn't, but would love nothing more. But that is getting off track. She is supposed to be convincing him that he needs to use the pixie dust, find the woman of his dreams and live happily ever after. Though it seems she isn't doing a good job of that, not when his hands are smoothing down her sides, lacing together behind her back at the base of her spine, securing her hips to his own.

"How did you come across it anyway?"

Oh. Right. She hadn't explained that part had she. Clearing the tightness in her throat, brought on by being this close to him, Regina sighs, poofing the bottle back into her hand, the other safely tucked over his heart. "I met Rosetta."

"When was this?" He cocks an eyebrow, eyeing her thoughtfully, internally clapping himself on the back that she hasn't stepped out of his embrace, but rather edged even further in. "A few days ago, she startled me and I fell off the balcony-". "You what? Are you alright? Why didn't you tell me?"

She cuts off his rambling with two fingers pressing against his lips, a whispered I'm fine accompanying. "Anyway. We kinda just started talking, about you-" her eyes flick up to his quickly, a hint of blush painting her cheeks, "She mentioned the pixie dust and thought it odd you hadn't used it yet." Regina shrugs, picking at a loose string on his shirt to keep her fingers from tracing his face instead. "And then she'd asked me if I thought we were happy."

"And what did you tell her?"

Her exhale is heavy as her forehead drops down to his chest. It's easier to hide her tears in his green tunic that to let him see them fall. She is happy. With him. Hidden away from the rest of the world, with Roland, happy even though her heart sinks heavy at the thought of Henry. A piece of her puzzle lost forever. He would have loved it here. In a castle, hearing stories of knights and epic battles, being taught how to fight with a sword by David no doubt, and a bow and arrow by the notorious Robin Hood himself, it would have been his dream come true. The sniffle that escapes her at the memories of her little prince has Robin tucking her into his arms, brushing his nose through her hair, running his palms up and down her back in an attempt to soothe her battered soul.

What will it take to get her to believe him that they are each other's happiness. He needs no magical sand to guide him there when he has already found it. He chooses her. But it's hard to convince someone they are the first choice when they have never been in the past for anyone else. Pressing a kiss into the crown of her head, his hand creeps between them to tilt her chin up, finding her eyes shining with tears she quickly tries to blink away. She is his first choice. He just has to get her to understand that.

"Okay, Fine. I'll use it."

"You will?"

"I will." He nods whilst toying with a curl between her shoulder blades.

She frowns slightly at his sudden change of heart, "And you will actually go where it leads you?"

"Yes."

He's still grinning at her, which is not exactly the reaction she expected, but at least he is warming up to the painful idea of leaving her. She nods, swallowing back her heartbreak.

It's for the best...dammit.

"I'm happy for you, Robin, truly." Her fingers reach up to caress the stubble of his cheek, gliding over the dimples she is so, so terribly fond of. Hopefully this new woman will think the same. Will love him just as much as she does. Which is impossible, but she can try, he deserves that much.

"But I'm coming back to you."

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"What?"

"I'll use the dust. I will go to wherever my soulmate is. I will introduce myself to her. I'll even tell her of our supposed destiny." He grunts at the word before smiling at her once again. "And then, Your Majesty, I will come back to you."

"Robin, you can't."

"Those are my terms."

"What if I don't want you to come back?"

"That's a blatant lie, and you know it."

He stares hard at her. It is most certainly a lie, and a poorly concealed one at that. The thought of letting him leave is already tearing strips off her heart, exposing old wounds to bleed fresh once more. Thankfully, Robin is nothing but persistent. Stubborn to the enth degree.

"You make no sense to me." She rolls her eyes, pushes away the warm swirl in her stomach as his fingers smooth along her jaw, down the slope of her neck, surely feeling the goosebumps his touch elicits, before settling at the base of her spine, toying playfully with the silk belt of her robe as he quips back "Why is that?"

"Everyone searches for their happy ending, some never find it, and it's being gifted to you on a silver platter and yet you refuse to take it."

"Well.." Robin bumps her nose with his own "I already have my happy ending Regina. With You. And Roland. And someday, with Henry."

She shouldn't feel that small nugget of hope burning like wildfire inside her, but it's there all the same. She hates hope. Loves it. But absolutely hates it.

"You let me go once, Regina. Please don't do it again."

"Robin, just listen to me..."

"Actually, with all do respect, Your Highness, I think I'm done listening."

He grips the vial hard, throwing it with as much power as he can muster, launches the red dust happily into the sky, far over the balcony with a grin as it floats aimlessly away, brushing off Regina's stammered out, Robin! What the hell?, sand he turns to her.

Squaring them face to face, cupping her cheeks and hoping to God if his words won't make her believe, maybe this can. She grips the lapels of his coat, stunned and a bit annoyed, but she instinctively holds him closer as his fingers thread through her hair, an arm wrapping around her waist, sandwiching them chest to chest. And then he kisses her. Through the slight breaking of glass on the stone pathway below them, he holds her as tight as he can, and kisses her till his lungs burn.

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Something hot surrounds him, a flush that roars through his body, but he refuses to let her lips go. It prickles along his skin, lightheadedness swirling about his brain, and burns beautifully somewhere deep. He wonders if she can feel it too.

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It's a crack of something she doesn't understand, pulsing at the base of her spine, spreading through every cell in her body, the hairs on the back of her neck standing upright as a shiver runs through her veins and it's incredible.

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Behind closed eyes, something flickering catches his attention. Letting their lips pop apart, there is nothing he can do but melt when his eyes open.

He knew it.

"Red… is most certainly your color, M'lady."

"What?"

"Open your eyes, my love."

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She's bathed in it, soaked in red, glittering gold speckled air. Outlining her slender silhouette, floating tenderly between them to where the gold flakes seem to cling to their joined hands that rest on his chest, glowing hot around their linked fingers till it fades into his own skin. He smiles though she frowns, completely confused, disbelief flooding her eyes as she stares down at her hands, and if he could freeze this moment in time, he would. Mentally takes a snapshot of her stunned face, mouth open, eyes wide, and utterly stunning in ruby red glow.

She steps back a half foot, turning her palms over, scanning up her body as though this is all a trick of the mind. Maybe she touched the pixie dust somehow and it transferred onto her? That's impossible though, and she knows it. But it makes no sense. This heat in her chest. The overwhelming buzzing up her spine. Everything about her is, well, red. A vibrant, illuminating shade of rose, that follows her hands no matter which way she moves them.

It's her? She's...but how? That's not possible, is it? Surely something isn't right? Maybe the—

He shuts up her inner monologue of questions with his lips, pressing tenderly into her own, humming into the spike of electricity that hits the back of this throat, spiralling down into his core, and he curls her in tighter, holding her without a fraction of distance between them.

She's his soulmate. He knew it even without the aid of magic, it was there in his heart, a golden thread strung about it, tethering him to her. He always has been. But at least now she knows. He sucks her lower lip gently, nipping as he releases it, grinning as she follows his mouth, carding through his hair and pulling him back for more. A second. A third. A forth. It's slowly settling in that they have a lifetime for this. After waiting for decades, it seems timing has finally worked out in their favour.

"Good thing I had that pixie dust."

He smiles into her mouth, pecking her perfect lips just because he can and she because will let him.

"I thought you said it was all a crock." She whispers back, raising a playful eyebrow in his direction, unable to keep herself from just smiling at him. At his dopey dimpled grin and laugh lined beautiful blue eyes she is allowed to drown in for the rest of her days.

"I don't recall saying that."

He kisses her. She lets him.

"You're an idiot."

She kisses him back. He holds her tight, cupping her cheeks so her lips can't part from his till he deems it appropriate, not that it ever will be. The red glow around her is starting to flicker away, but her cheeks are no less flushed as Robin memorizes her face for the hundredth time, logging away the serene peace etched across her features.

"Ah, but fate would have me being your idiot, Your Majesty."

And thank God for that, she hums silently, leaning back into his space, wrapping her arms around his neck, inhaling an air chilled breath, laced with cedar pine and rain. She always did like the smell of forest.

"I guess you're stuck with me."

Robin pulls back, finding her smiling happy eyes, thumbing along the ridge of her cheekbone as she leans into his palm with a content sigh.

"You okay with that? Being tethered to me?"

The erratic arrhythmia of her heart prances merrily away in her chest, and for the first time in a very, very long time, it dawns on Regina, that this is what happiness feel like.

"Definitely."


	16. Chapter 16

Four months later….

He has a thing for her hair it seems, not that she didn't already know, but it's becoming more and more apparent, especially in moments like these, his undying affinity and need to comb through it, scratch along the base of her scalp, twirl a curl in his finger, or bury his face into the crook of her neck when they sleep.

And she should be sleeping, especially after last night, finding out that they are destined to have more than she ever bargained for. He'd kissed her between the happiest of tears, till her lungs burned and knees went weak, wrapped her up in his arms, threaded his hands through her hair, and carried her off to her bed.

The memory of his body heavy on top of hers has a smile tugging across her lips, the feeling of his hands scouring her body, up her sides and down her thighs. It makes her skin tingle, still, as she burrows further down into the pillow, watching the light rose of sky begin to line the horizon. Behind her, her _soul mate_ , such a funny word for her to use, even to this day, puffs in his sleep, shifting and tugging her closer to him, unable to let her go even in slumber.

It's nice, has her heart stumbling over itself as his hand slides across her abdomen, curling up higher and resting innocently on her breast, something she would have laughed at given the memories of a few hours ago, but instead she slips down into his warmth further, holding his hand on top of her chest.

She can feel his heartbeat against her back, strumming steady, strong and resilient. It's not enough though, just to feel it's pace behind her, the need to have it under her palm has her turning as quietly as possible, biting back a smile at his low grumble of, "Where you going?"

To which she simply kisses his chest, and shakes her head, "No where." Curling into him and resting her hand on his heart, soaking in everything that is him.

For the first time, in quite some time, she can't help but feel, well, safe. Cuddled up under the heap of blankets, the chill of morning long forgotten thanks to the heat radiating from her love, the anchoring of his arms around her body, locking them together as he sleeps on, pressing a lazy kiss to the crown of her head. A mumbled, _Good,_ making her tingle from tip to toe, erasing the thought of being alone that had plagued her since the day she lost Henry. Even further back if she is being honest, but now, it's safely tucked away into a locked box in her mind, key thrown thankfully away.

Alone, being alone, she forces the thought from her mind, cradling herself into a very much alive Robin, feeling even in his sleep, the half hardness that presses into her stomach. A want that has her body flushing hot at the memory of sweat, roaming hands, hot desperate clinging and burning coils that popped like fireworks behind her eyes just a few hours prior.

Her thighs clench at the recall, how slick and wet he had made her, the tight hitched begging she didn't know her voice would allow, the breathless crying out of his name, the reciprocation of her own escaping him, kissing her through words of how much he loved her, how much he needed her, that he would never, ever let her go.

His whispered promises has her hand edging lower between them, finding his hardness warm and soft beneath her hand, his following sleepy groan spurring her on further as she slowly strokes up, circling her thumb around the tip before sliding back down. Her eyes watch his face, as she repeats the motions over and over, squeezing a little more with each pass, the furrow on his brow deepening, mouth parting, warm breath ghosting about her, his hips flexing slightly into her hand.

She adores this part of him, being putty in her hand with a few well placed touches, the way he breathes out her name like a whisper. It has her all hot and fuzzy inside. Shifting enough to push the blankets down a little past their hips, it gives her more free reign to explore his body, a body so new to her, one that is now hers, and only hers to claim.

Robin groans as she peppers his throat with barely there kisses, lining his jaw, nipping at his Adam's apple that bobs heavily, his hand finding her hip, squeezing rhythmically through his half awake state. "What are you doing?" he breathes out as her tongue finds his collarbone, slow and wide licks along his skin.

"Nothing." she murmurs into his neck with a chuckle, pumping him steadily, spreading the slick wetness that pools on his tip.

He huffs a laugh, opening his lighter than sky blue eyes, "Nothing is going to get you into trouble M'lady." Robin quips as she tips her head up, reaching for his lips, brushing over top, letting him chase her mouth for a moment.

"Maybe I like a bit of trouble." The way he shivers underneath her palm, the sharp inhale between his lips she busses, it has a tingly wetness pool between her thighs.

Her lips part in a smile, one that matches his own as his fingers slide along the silk hem of her shirt, baring the slight swell, ever so new and unexpected. "Are you complaining, Thief?" Her eyebrows arch as his grin deepens through a rough groan as she palms him harder, stroking solidly up and down the warm thickness of his shaft.

Robin shifts, kicks at the blankets at their feet, shivers as he stops the motion of her still teasing hand before he loses all sense of logical thought, presses a kiss to her knuckles and slides her arms around his neck. Bumping her nose affectionately, he sighs, sleepily and happy into her embrace. "No, I am not. However, I do believe we have a mandatory meeting this morning."

His lips buss her own quickly, hands finding their way to her backside, a gentle squeeze follows, one that she yipes and nips at his nose for in retaliation. She finds his eyes, glazing over in half sleep half arousal, a silver grey around his cobalt irises, his tongue darting out, dragging across his lower lip before a line of white teeth bite down on it, and she should be the one to bite down on it. It's hers after all, his lip, his smile, his body, all of it, pixie dust said so, and who is she to discount that?

"Well," she slides her hips over to settle soft thighs around coarse strong ones, "I am the Queen." He hums in response, palming her backside greedily. "And being the Queen means I can show up to these ridiculous meetings whenever I - " she presses a kiss to his chin, "damn," another to the tip of his nose, "well," a third at the corner of his jaw, "please." A last to his lips, tugging his lower lip that she owns as they part, a smile brimming along her lips he chases with his mouth, agreeing breathlessly that it is true, they can wait, he on the other hand simply cannot.

Nipping at her jaw, he grips her hips, rolling them both over with a laugh, one she matches whilst burrowing her face into the crook of his neck, sampling the slight sheen of sweat from collarbone to chin. Her legs wrapped smoothly around his hips, hugging them tight together, the little bump brushes his low abdomen, the feeling of it pressed gently into him has butterflies crawling beautifully about his heart, buzzing from tip to toe as he sits back, palming either side her ribs, smoothing down to her hips, running his thumbs over her stomach till they meet in the middle, just below her belly button. She's watching, he knows she is, eyeing him up adoringly as he can't help but smile, for the simple fact there is a little miracle residing safely within her, their little miracle.

"Do you think we should tell them soon?"

His eyes meets hers as his fingers rub absent circles over her stomach. "They probably suspect anyway."

"I wouldn't put it past Snow to already know, nosy as she is." Regina rolls her eyes, shuffling down to sink into the silk pillows, anchoring herself beneath him. It's not anyone's to know but theirs, and it's still so fresh, still rather unbelievable that it happened, every book she had read didn't have an answer, it was something she long gave up, took away herself decades ago, and yet here she is, eleven and a half weeks pregnant.

Robin chalks it up to love, but she knows that can't be the true reason. It had to be more, she wondered, he didn't really care, was just happy to kiss her uncertain frown away and paint a dream for her of what was to come.

And she is happy, honestly, but there is a niggling prick in her heart that keeps the joy from spilling over. She knows it's Henry. The feeling of his loss still ever so palpable, and fear that this is betraying him, which she also knows is completely ridiculous, he'd be over the moon for her, thunderous in his happiness that she has love, has family, even if it's without him. But it hurts, and she knows it won't ever go away.

Robin understands it. Confessed in the quietest of hours he too wondered still about Marian, what would have come if she hadn't succumb to illness, had told Regina the story of how she died, never knowing that the Queen already knew, had played a role in the attempt to save his wife's life.

She didn't tell him.

Out of fear? Perhaps.

Maybe he would berate her with questions, why she didn't try harder, or tap into some unknown source of magic to save his family. Maybe he would be angry with her. Would find it selfish she didn't save Marian. Would he leave her over it? Walk away from everything they've created, abandon her back into the dark abyss of loneliness.

He wouldn't. Regina knows that. He'd listen, be infuriatingly understanding, more than likely thank her for even sparing a thought his way all those years ago. He'd curl her in tight, and brush away the insecurities that beat down on her soul. He would give her the forgiveness she doesn't feel deserving of. So no, she didn't tell him about their paths crossing deliberately, how she swallowed the poison in Marian's lung just so she could see him smile once more, maybe one day she will.

"Granny knows." He leans down, pressing a kiss between her breasts, one over her heart, hands still safe guarding their little spud, "As does Ruby."

"Mmm, a part of their wolf sensitivity." She agrees, closing her eyes and letting everything melt away so she can simply feel his hands on her, roaming easily, "They won't say anything." Robin nods, reaching to lace their fingers together, guiding it down to lay against her abdomen. "I think, if you let them, Snow and David will be beyond happy for us." He flicks his gaze down to their hands, biting back a smile at the thought of the day he will get to hold them both in his arms, mother and child, watching babe suckle from breast. She sighs "I know, I'm just not ready yet." And it's okay, if she isn't prepared to shout it from the mountain tops like he is, one day she will be, he can wait. "Whatever you wish, My Love."

Her hands squeeze his own, "Well, since you're in such a giving mood, I wouldn't mind finishing what I started." His laugh is matched by the flirtatious bounce of her brows, and he can't find a reason to deny her, his Queen, his love, the mother of his unborn child.

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"We haven't heard from the Witch in months, I don't see why that's a bad thing." David throws his hands in the air irritated, and full of naivety as far as Regina is concerned. It's true. Everything on that front has been quiet, far too quiet for her liking, it's a constant threatening cloud that hangs just off in the distance, brewing and darkening while they do nothing but sit like ducks, waiting for the storm to strike. "Maybe she gave up?" Snow chimes in, grabbing her husband's hand with a reassuring smile, "Besides, we have something else far more exciting to be talking about."

Regina freezes in her seat as Snow's eyes find her own, her hand unconsciously finding the secret she keeps hidden under a thick velvet dress and cloak as she swallows thick. They couldn't know. Robin wouldn't have dared speak a word, either would Granny, it would be impossible, she's done everything to keep it quiet. Nausea burns in her throat, tears prickle her eyes at the thought of being exposed to everyone, the urge to vanish from spot and retreat into her chambers violent under her fingertips that white knuckle against the wooden arm rests.

"Are you alright Regina?" David's question rings in her ears, "You look flushed." She can feel it, the heat that pools in her cheeks, crawls like spiders up her spine as she tries to nod, does her best to scowl and look anywhere else but at them as she waves them off, huffing out that she is fine, it's just hot. "Perhaps you should shed a layer, god knows you must be boiling under that cloak in the summer sun." Snow arches an eyebrow at her attire, scanning Regina from head to toe curiously. "I said I am fine."

"Alright, well, as Snow was saying, we have something to share with you all." David stands, pressing a quick kiss to his wife's knuckles, "We are happy to announce that Snow and I are expecting a baby."

There is a collective gasp around the table, a happy clapping congratulations that rings about the dining hall. Regina however, is rooted to her seat, jaw agape, as she watches those around her hug the pair across the oak table. Pregnant. Snow is pregnant. She is pregnant. They are to have a baby at the same time. Her fingers roll over her stomach, tracing a shaky pattern over her own tiny bump and her throat runs dry as she see's the happy joyous tears stream down the groups cheeks. They are happy for them. Unabashedly so.

Would they be for her?

Hug her fiercely tight and wish nothing but health and happiness for her little one? Would there be congratulations for the once Evil Queen that sought to ruin their lives and destroy everything they held dear. Sweat beads along her temple, a tightness in her chest that burns and coils deep, constricting the ability to breathe. His palm with hot on her shoulder, lighting her on fire as she scrambles against the chair, hearing it screech against the stone floor as she forces back from the table, blindly reaching for his hand, her name ringing out from Snow as she vanishes, gone in a puff of purple smoke, running away, she doesn't know what else to do.

The curses bounce of the concrete walls of her bed chamber, nails clawing at her scalp as she stumbles to the bed, blindly falling into the mattress, tugging the blankets up to her chin as the heat of tears fall against her cheeks, a strangled sob escaping as she curls into herself, a hand resting on her stomach, feeling the small fluttering of life that swirls beneath. It's absurd, the panic attack that rising from the base of her spine, she knows it, but it unable to tamp it down.

She should be happy, for Snow and David, for her and Robin. But all she can see are his eyes, hazel and smiling up at her, fading into the distance, farther and farther away, tumbling into blackness she can't reach anymore. They are moving on. All of them. Creating a life here, without the other pieces of their family, a puzzle forever incomplete. They didn't even seem to care about the fact they were doing it, letting go to the other half of their world, however lost and unattainable, just melt away. Everyone was doing it, and she seems to be the only one who can't.

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..

.

She doesn't rouse till the light rubbing on her shoulder pulls her from sleep, too light to be Robin's. He would already be tucked in behind her, warm breath pulsing against her neck, hands hugging her own. It's definitely not him. She recoils at the thought of someone else seeing her like this. Red eyes, puffy and swollen. Tear stains down her cheeks. It's embarrassing. Makes her feel far to exposed and vulnerable to prying eyes that will only ask questions she isn't sure she wants to answer just yet.

"Regina?"

 _It would be her._

"Regina, I need to talk to you."

She groans into her pillow, shifting away from the hand that runs up and down her bicep slowly.

"Please."

Blinking back the brandishing display of her meltdown, building her amour back up silently, the blankets fall back as she sits up, running a palm over her eyes that dare not lock onto the green ones that watch her questioning. It's near dusk, dark purple painted skies invade the dying orange sunset glow, She avoids, tugging at the silver grey hem of the mattress, counting the millimeters the sun melts away into the horizon.

"What's wrong?"

Well, straight to the point then. Her eyes cinch shut, exhaling a heavy breath into the tense air that hugs her tight like a vice. "Nothing." She lies, thumbing over her baby bump hidden underneath the blanket.

"Then why did you run?"

"I didn't run."

"Yes you did."

 _God she is infuriating._

"I just had somewhere to be."

"Hiding you mean."

"I'm not hiding!"

"Regina." Snow levels her a hard stare, and it irritates her, the smug knowing expression the younger woman passes her way. "Tell me."

"There is nothing to tell."

A beat of silence passes between them, hot and uncomfortably suffocating. She stills feeling Snow's hand gently pressed over the one on her stomach, a tight bubble igniting in her throat as she feels the tracing of fingers roam quietly over her secret, a curious frown edging on Snow's face as she slowly peels the blanket armour down. "Regina?" A slight hitched gasps escapes, "Are you pregnant?". A thick tear rolls traitorously down, the shake of her jaw relentless against the tight clenching of her teeth.

"Why didn't you tell me?"

Her knees pull up, forcing Snow's hand away from her stomach and back into her own lap as she looks out into the sky once more, the sun on the horizon gone, melted away into the cobalt sapphire sky, twinkling with bright stars. Henry liked the stars. Had begged her to paste up the thick, plastic, green star plaques on his bedroom roof, constellations glowing when the lights when out. He knew them all, from the largest more common, to the smallest miniscule ones that hid in the skies. She bought him one for his 8th birthday, a star. One that he could find all the time, name himself, claim a part of his heart to the world beyond. He had loved that, vowed it was one of his most cherished gifts. She can still find it to this day. Two to the bottom right of Orions foot, a soldier her son had read every last detail about, the small twinkling star he'd aptly named Anakin, a grace to a favorite character from an adored series about good guys and bad, where nothing was ever truly black and white, a place where villains maybe weren't always so terrible and heroes not quite squeaky clean. A fairytale in the stars.

"You're afraid." It's not a question, just simple annoying fact being smarted at her.

"How can I not be?" She swallows thickly, stealing back the tears with a hard sniff, twiddling the soft thread from the silver grey blanket, tightening it around a knuckle till the pad goes white, tingling with the lack of blood flow.

"Henry would be happy for you."

"I know that."

"Then why are you hiding in your room?"

"I'm not hiding!"

Snow sighs heavy, it's like talking to a brick wall sometimes with her step mother, always reclusive, never wanting to show an ounce of exposed vulnerability, she opts instead of a another question that won't be answered, to run her hand over her own bump, "When are you due?".

"Sometime in the summer." Regina muses quietly, "At least I think so." Smoothing over her own small swell thoughtfully, wondering in the distance if in a few months she would be looking down into chocolate brown eyes or bright sky blue ones. She doesn't really care. Blue, she thinks. Like Robin's. Eyes so bright you can see the clouds float through them in the warmest of sunny days. "So they will grow up pretty close together then." Snow continues, smiling uncontrollably at the thought, "I'm late spring I think, not like we can exactly go see a doctor or anything." She chuckles, laying back on the Queen's bed, ever so uninvited, not that Snow appears to care. "I'd love an ultrasound, just to get to see what this little one looks like, if it's a boy or a girl." She pauses, "Do you know what you want?"

And she doesn't, hasn't really put a ton of thought into anything more than keeping it a secret and ensuring it's healthy, that's been her priority, so she shrugs, settles her palm over the bump with a shy smile, "One of each would be kind of fun."

"Twins?"

"Why not?"

"Well you've never been one to back down to a challenge that's for sure."

They share a laugh, and something inside Regina pops, a small bubble of anxiety bursting that lifts and floats away into the faded sunset.

"I'm happy for you Regina."

"I am too." She squeezes Snow's hand, finally allowing herself to share, "I just wish Henry was here." Her heart hangs heavy. He would have been a magnificent older brother, she knows it. He would have spent hours reading fairytale's to the younger sibling at night, underneath blankets with a flashlight glowing when they should be sleeping, playing endlessly in the yard heroes and monsters, being a protector, a guide. She misses him. Terribly so. A knock at the door turns their attention, a dimpled tentative smile peeking in, and she can't help but think he is so damn adorable, and prays to anyone that will silently listen that her little one will have those same dimples. "Am I interrupting?" He questions sitting down next to Regina reaching across to lace their hands over her bump. Regina leans into his lips that press against her temple, smiling into his affection, and it feels good, a happy good, one that can help ease the sadness that still resides deep down.

"I'll leave you two alone. Congratulations again."

Robin answers for the both of them, graciously thanking Snow as she leaves he and Regina in their chambers with their growing bump. The door clicks shut, and he turns to Regina who is thumbing along the small swell, the chocolate eyes he so loves glazes over in thought. "Everything alright?" He tilts down, as she turns, smiling bright through a sheen of tears, and he understands, knows that for as joyous at this whole situation is, there will always be a piece of her in another realm, and it's okay, they will figure out a way to get back to Henry, even if she doesn't believe it.

They fall asleep tucked together, back to front, his arm draped across her hips, palm settled in her own over their child.


	17. Chapter 17

**Chapter 17 - Rain and Rose Petals**

It seems that her musing two months ago about having twins has turned out be a reality. Thanks to an old wolf's rather adept nose and her own feeling of two twin bubbles of magic swirling around inside her rather swollen belly, what was once a simple thought is now her future. Two babies. Twins. A boy and a girl. She knows it. Can feel the softness of one, her daughter, and the rather rambunctious nature of the other, clearly a boy.

They are having twins.

Robin was over the moon when they figured it out. Had spent day and night doting on Regina hand and foot. Not that he wasn't doing that already when they thought it was only one. But it's almost overwhelming now. The hawk-eyed attention he attends to her with. She hasn't missed a breakfast, lunch or dinner. Is frequently brought snacks in between, whatever her bizarre cravings have her going into a frantic fit over. It appears salted caramel and watermelon are the key vices currently. Eggs, a complete no. As is any red meat and squash vegetables, apparently it's something about the texture suddenly has her stomach revolting. Those were unfortunately figured out over a few dinners, ones that had her visiting the porcelain god more times than she wished.

But they've figured it out. Mostly at least. Some things are still touch and go. But it is working. Thankfully. And she is more than grateful for the extra back and foot rubs at her heart's content. The cool, calming smoothing of lotion over tight skin on her belly a given every night with Robin's hands, up and down and around, till her eyes are a fraction from closing and sleep claiming her. She does, sleep, like a log, unwakeable unless someone has a death wish. It's a saving grace from the increasing uncomfortable ache in her back as her front grows, the tornado of emotions for a woman who already lives on a teetering edge of them is now flung full force into the ever changing winds.

She cries on a dime, over the silliest things. Two days ago it was flowers, dead flowers to be exact, ones that Roland had given her a few days prior and the sight of their brown, dry, curled up leaves spattering her vanity had been enough to send Regina into inconsolable tears, until her little saviour had thrust a brand new bundle into her tear stained face. If it's not tears then it's something else. A dwarf that gave her the wrong look, a _too cheery_ smile sent her way by Snow. It was a spinning wheel. Thankfully, Robin is a patient man, and head over heels in love with the mother of his unborn children.

Her favorite moments are those spent lounging against a mountain of pillows listening to Robin softly speak to their growing children. Telling them (overly exaggerated in her opinion) tales of his outlaw life, how he stole from the rich, gave to the poor, took down three ogres with a single arrow (she'd laughed at that one though he had shushed her). However, his favorites stories are of her. How he found her one day crying by a lake, a stubborn beauty that stole his heart the moment he saw her. Regina had flushed at that, thrown a pillow at him playfully. Fortunately he leaves out the parts where they were not together, instead focuses on the good times, finding her again, falling in love all over. He's a good father already, and she is thankful for it.

This entire thing is unexpected and though she doesn't voice it much, completely terrifying. She'd lost a child already, one who doesn't remember a single thing about her.

What if that happens to these two as well? What if she is just not meant to be a mother?

It's a constant plague that follows her around as she walks through the dark corridors, down into the dining hall and is hit with a cacophony of noise. Nothing is quiet these days. A far cry from the hollow echoing of her castle decades ago.

"Regina!" Snow's happy wave from the head table catches her first before she can find Robin. It leaves her little choice between going to sit with the princess or standing like a lost idiot in the middle of the banquet hall. She groans, places a hand on her belly, lets her twins magical pops tone back her sarcasm as she slides into a chair beside Snow. For two women who are nearly following the same pregnancy timeline (only what, three weeks apart?), Snow on her part looks as though she is the one carrying twins and not the other way around. Regina knows she is thin, but she always has been, pregnancy has put some girth to her body, but it truly hasn't changed much save for the swollen belly and larger breasts, two things Robin is all too fond of. Perhaps she should eat more, it's not just for two, but three. And yet her appetite hasn't skyrocketed quite as much as her libido.

"How are you feeling?"

She piles a couple strawberries on her plate. "Fine, and you?"

"Oh good! The baby started to kick today! Well kind of. He or she just swirls around in there, but it feels the same as when I had Emma." Regina smiles as Snow prattles on about her unborn child, her eyes still searching for her thief, who has yet to make an appearance though his Merry Men are in a ruckus of laughter at the far table.

"Regina?"

"What?" The question startles her, pulls her out of the need to find Robin. "Sorry. What did you say?"

"You were daydreaming." Snow eyes her up happily. She was caught red-handed so it's not like she can lie, simply shrugs with a coy smile and munches on another berry. "Robin is doing a perimeter walk. You can relax."

Relax. That's about the last thing she can do. It makes her nerves set on fire. What if something happens and she isn't there to protect him? In all reality it's probably why he didn't tell her in the first place, knowing she'd put up a fight and insist that she be with him. His need to be her shield is somewhat irritating at times.

"He'll be fine, Regina." Snow reaches to grasp her hand. "How are the twins?"

"Good. I can feel their magic."

"They have magic!"

"What did you expect? I have it."

"Well sure, but I didn't know if it would pass on to your children or not. I mean Emma does, but Henry doesn't."

Her heart shudders in her chest at the thought of her son. How his eyes would light up when they'd lay in bed reading Harry Potter, his dying wish to get a letter to the magical school. If only he'd known at 8 just how close he truly was to it all.

She is about to answer when the dining hall doors violently swing open, a gust of frozen cold air blowing in, snuffing out the candles about the room as a dark smokey cloud glides inside. Her core freezes as she stands, watching the Wicked Witch take form in front of her.

"Did I miss breakfast?" The witch sneers out. "Shame. I do like the conversations to be had over coffee." There is no movement in the crowd as the blonde steps forward, her tall heels clicking harshly over the stone floors, her eyes remain trained on Regina. _Where the hell is Robin?_ The storm inside Regina brews, flickers at her fingertips with each step that closes the distance between them, her children pulsing in her stomach as she stands, magic sparking in her veins.

"Well, would you look at that," blue eyes scan down Regina's form, "I suppose congratulations are in order." Her eyes turn to Snow's "Multiple congratulations." She stalks slowly up to the table, picking a blueberry off of Snow's plate who sits frozen in her chair, David with a hand on the pommel of his sword standing up in front of his pregnant wife. "Touch her and I'll cut your hands off."

"My, my, no need to get violent." Sarah smiles maliciously, "Let's hope the little one doesn't inherit your idiocy and anger."

"What do you want?"

The witch turns on her heel, squaring her shoulders to Regina who scowls hard. "I'd like to know where my brother is."

"Well clearly you can see he isn't here."

"Yes, I did notice that. A pity really. This is after all for him." She waves her hand prophetically, raising a sharp eyebrow at Regina. "You see, Regina, my brother, as heroic as he may play, is in fact the exact opposite. He is nothing but a coward."

"I'd watch your tongue, Witch." Regina spits back, drawing herself up to her full height. The hairs on the back of her neck spiking.

"Gently, your majesty. I'd hate for you to exhaust yourself or the little ones you're keeping ever so safe in there."

Regina shudders, _she knows it's twins._

"Now before you so rudely interrupted me." She snaps, "My brother has you all fooled. The brave Robin Hood. It's a lie. He loves nothing and no one but himself."

"We know two very different people then."

"Do we?"

Of course they do. It's Robin. Robin who loves his son, his merry men, her thief who loves her, is the kindest soul she knows walking this earth. But pain makes the brain work in odd ways. She can see the rage that hides agony in peircing blue eyes. She knows that feelings. Far too well.

"He left me."

"You were kidnapped."

"And he did nothing."

"That's not true and you know it."

"Do I?" Sarah growls, "Tell me, Regina. In Robin's version, did he tell you of how I was stolen by men who wished to beat my magic from me? Had me chained to a tree while they burned and whipped me? How those same men sold me to warlocks who would hex and curse me till I passed out from the pain?"

A beat of silence passes, "I didn't think so. He left me to die."

"He was only ten when you were taken. What did you expect him to do?"

"I would think that someone you all claim holds a heart of gold would have tried to save his only sister."

"So you are here to what? Pout? Hope for pity?" Regina sneers back, her magic pulsing in her palms. "You've come to the wrong place."

The witch hums, rolls her eyes and leans into Regina, the smell of bitter apples coating her nostrils as the she breathes out heavily. "I know all about your reign, how you got here, what happened inside these walls, secrets you wish to keep hidden." Regina's blood runs cold. There are very few people that know of the horrors this castle has seen.

"You see, we aren't that different, you and I. The only difference I suppose is that unlike you, I am not weak in getting my revenge on those who hurt me."

Her eyes flick to Snow, who true to her name is white as a ghost behind David. "I plan to take everything from Robin. But seeing as he isn't exactly here, why don't we have some fun first hmm?" Her hands flash an emerald green and the windows smash around the hall, shattering to the ground in sharp shards that swirl into tornados.

The hall erupts, weapons drawn as flurries of winged beasts crash into the hall, wailing and screeching as they dive down into the crowd, clawing and tearing at flesh. She hears the wicked witch cackle, before swiping out half the hall with a wave of her hand. Regina is frozen, for a half second caught in a moment of fear for her children bursting with magic in her belly. She should run, should put them first, she should poof herself out of this hall and find Robin. A growling scream from the side pulls her back, Granny crouching over Ruby who is spattered in blood, crossbow firing at the beasts that cease their attack.

Her magic pulses, swirls from her fingertips, setting fire to a dozen beasts in the sky, the smoldering smell of flesh putrid as they fall to the ground in ash. It's a whirlwind after that. Magic deflecting magic as the Witch fires over and over again, at Regina, at the commoners, at Little John and Tuck who hide Roland behind their legs. His cry for her has every nerve in her body on fire. No one scares her son. She sends out a black flare of electricity, swarming around the Witch who screams and writhes on the spot, curling into her core.

Regina sees it happening, the way the blonde's spindly fingers grip and claw at the spires that surround her. It lights hot white, into a massive bubble between her hands, glaring up into the Witch's face, illuminating the hate that bubbles inside. Her eyes flick from Regina to Snow, who is left unattended at the hall table.

 _Where the hell is David?_

The clash of a sword enlights her, but he is too far away to help, caught in his own battle. It happens in a second, the doors crash open. She sees Robin, pale faced, bloodied torso, eyes wide in panic as he searches for her.

"It's about time you showed up dear brother." Sarah glowers, the pulse of magic between her hands growing steadily. "I was just about to have some fun, and help Regina here with a little pesky problem she's been fighting her entire life."

Time stills, the white hot orb vibrates, "Shall we, Snow White?"

The bubble erupts, Regina jumps, an arrow flies, and Snow screams.

It's violent, the pain that ricochets up her spine, licking into her brain, setting every nerve on fire, her muscles seizing and clenching, vision blurring as her ears ring. Someone calls out her name, a hand icy cold on her chest, pressing hard, too hard, it feels as though she is being suffocated. She claws at the ground, blinking against the onslaught of electricity that lights her body up.

"Regina?" Robin's voice shakes as her vision swarms back into place. He is terrified. She can see it in his eyes. "Regina, Love. Can you hear me?" She nods, or at least tries to, but her back spasms and she clutches his hand through a hard pain riddled hiss. "It's okay, don't move, my love."

"Seems fitting doesn't it?" Sarah sputters a few yards ahead of Regina, laying against the stone, an arrow protruding out of her chest, staining the green velvet gown a dark seeded red. "That you be the one to kill me. Your own sister." Her breath shakes violently, but Robin does not move his eyes from Regina's, who is beginning to fade into the dark abyss of pain.

"Some _hero_ you are, Robin Hood."

.

..

...

..

.

She's caught in between the pinnacle of blissful sleep and the aggravating, uncomfortable feeling of muscles locked in a position for far too long. Knees crack first, a sting in her back, sharp and hot, follows as she rolls slowly. Something feels off. The typical sleep addled stiffness that usually hugs her tight these days, is but a fore thought, pushed to the side, replaced by a low burning ache in her abdomen, one that blooms maliciously. It hurts. Cramps hard and twists callously, sending a wave of nausea storming into her throat. The urge to cry out stifled when a warm hand finds her own, squeezing gently as she finds control over her breathing once more.

"Robin?"

"Hi, my love."

She finally opens her eyes, sighing heavily through a happy smile at the sound of his voice. He always sounds so warm, a slight worn rasp, but it reminds her of whiskey. The calm in his tone is quickly shattered as she sees the hard set lines in his face, a sad look she can't exactly place.

"What's wrong?"

Robin shakes his head, though his lip still trembles as he bites down on it. Something is not right. It sinks low, grips her heart as she watches his gaze falter from her eyes and down to her stomach, to their children.

"How are you feeling?" His eyes are red rimmed, clearly he's been crying, she's only seen him openly weep a few times, each one encompassed by the fact he has lost something, someone.

"What happened?"

"Are you feeling alright, my love?"

He's avoiding the question, and she can't quite ask what her heart refuses to face, a question that burns hot in her chest.

"Robin. What's going on?"

She sees the way his Adam's apple bobs through a heavy swallow, a line of white teeth biting down into his lip, everything in her stomach churns and recoils at the sight, more over when his thumb swipes along her bump and the tears in his eyes pile high. "Just tell me you're alright, Regina. Please."

Stilling his hand on her stomach, the lie tastes like acid on her tongue as she musters up a smile and forces back the staggering discomfort lingering in her body. "I'm fine." He knows she is lying, she can see it in the way he sighs, and nods, and for once he lets her get away with it, doesn't press or push the truth out. It makes her anxious.

"How much can you recall?"

Not much in all reality. There was a fight, Sarah was there, she couldn't exactly hear what the witch was saying to Snow above the commotion, but the fear in the younger woman's eyes was enough to have Regina racing through the battle ground, throwing everything and everyone out of her way as she watched the witch's hand spark with the white electric orb. She shakes her head, wincing at the pain in her back though she dare not show it right now, "I pushed Snow out of the way when Sarah attacked."

Robin smiles, a tight, pitiful, heart breaking thing, "You saved her."

"Then why are you crying?" She flares, irritated at the nervousness that grips her heart. "Robin just tell me. You're scaring me more just sitting there in silence."

"I-I'm sorry..." He stutters, defeated in the way he squeezes her hand back, guilt etched through his eyes as his gaze falls back to her stomach. Why he can't look her in the eyes is beyond her as she shifts slightly underneath the blankets, moving enough to sit up against the headboard and reach for his face. He leans into her palm on instinct, pressing his nose into the soft skin, exhaling thick as her fingers scratch through his stubble.

"Tell me." She smiles through the fear, "Please."

"I'm so so sorry, my love."

"Sorry for what? What happened?"

He takes a breath, gently landing his palm along the curve of her belly, and she can see it in his eyes, how they twitch and blink far too quickly. She'd laugh if she wasn't so afraid. Laugh at the fact she knows him better than he thinks. Can read him like a book, knows when he is trying to figure out what to say, some sort of fabrication to appease her. She wants to laugh but he sniffs hard, running a palm along his face, pinching the bridge of his nose, composing himself before her hands are laced into his own once more, and he is trying to smile.

It's bad. It has to be bad for him to be acting this way.

"Please, don't lie to me."

Rosetta moves from the side chair, the first sign she was even still in the room, and while normally Regina would be irritated that someone decided to infiltrate her bedchambers without her permission, there is something about this fairy that she can't simply turn her back on. The red of her dress seems dim, like it's lost it's golden sparkle as she sits down on the bed beside them, swallowing back heavy, "Regina, when you pushed Snow out of the way, you took the full brunt of Sarah's attack."

That must explain why she is so sore. But it's just soreness. She has dealt with worse, so why they are treating her like a china doll is...it's terrifying because it's not just her muscles that ache, her heart feels as though it bleeds.

"I'm sorry, Regina, it's your son."

For a half second she sees Henry's face, but he is safe, with Emma in New York. He is fine. Roland is on the chaise across from her, sleeping soundly like the dead with his stuffed monkey tucked under his tiny little arms. Her boys are fine, two out of the four.

She stares at Rosetta wide eyed, "What about him?" Her hands scramble down to her swollen belly, over the top of Robin's in a desperate search to find her children inside. "What happened?!" The ache is peircing, overwhelming, heavy like tar and the tears rush hot into her eyes.

"He's gone."

"No."

She fumbles, hissing at the pain that sparks in her abdomen. "No, he's fine. They are both fine." Her magic pulses out, chasing the little bubbles of magic they each emit. Hers is soft like rose petals, his, ticklish gentle rain. Shutting her eyes she focuses on her magic, letting it seep through her skin, her heart jolting at the feeling of her daughter, happy and safe. It's the only thing she can feel. There is no rain.

"I'm so sorry, Regina."

"No! You're lying!" She turns to Robin, staring fearfully at the tears that fall down his cheeks. "Robin, she's lying!" The desperation strangles her, frightful anger trembles in her voice, shakes down to her hand that grips his till her knuckles turn white. "Why are you just sitting there!"

"I'm sorry, my love, there was nothing more the fairies could do."

"Stop!" She hates crying, but the tears are uncontrollable, falling tumultously down her cheeks, scalding hot against her skin, "Just tell me the truth."

"I am, Regina."

There is no air in this room, she can't breathe, feels the constriction around her lungs like a vice grip, she can't breathe, can't pull in a single breath, though her chest screams for it. "I don't believe you." She doesn't, refuses to. This is not happening, this is just a dream, she will wake up any moment, and they will all be fine, all of them.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, my love."

She stares at him, through blurred watery vision, waiting for this to all be some cruel joke. He doesn't move, does his best to ease her fear with a small smile and a kiss to the back of her palm. She thinks she hears him whisper into her skin that their daughter is fine, but she isn't exactly sure as her ears ring and thump. Words catch against the lump in her throat, the single pops of magic from only one child dance along her palm.

"I lost him." She sinks into the mattress and stares out the balcony into the dying sunset, "I lost our son…"

.

..

…

..

.

His breath is hot against her cheek, uneven and distressed even in his sleep, but he is there, laying beside her, his hand cupping the swollen belly that now holds only one where there should be two. Her eyes itch from exhaustion and the remnants of tears long ago shed into her pillow. How long she cried she doesn't know, but her mind seemed to take over, shutting her down before anything more could happen. But now? She is awake, feeling the rise and fall of Robin's chest beside her, the furrow in his brow deep in a pained scowl. He's lost so much. A family, a wife, and now a child. She understands that pain, wishes she could do everything in her power to bleed him of it.

It's still dark outside, stars twinkling in the midnight blue inked sky, her stomach rolling as her daughter moves about, readjusting herself before it all goes silently still once more. Her hands shake as they settle on the swell, tears heat and burn quickly once more.

"I'm so sorry."

She falls back asleep, even if there is no rest to be found.

 _ **_ Regina's Dream_**_

 _By the grace of God, she is finally able to crawl into bed. Feet swollen, back aching, head pounding out a drumming beat, but her mattress is there to soothe it all away as she sinks down with a heavy relieved moan._

" _You're home."_

 _She feels his hand wrap around her waist, tugging her back to his chest with a sleepy sigh. "I missed you." He kisses the crown of her head, breathing in her scent as sleep claims him again. Being the mayor has definitely been time consuming these days. It seems everyone needs her this exact minute, not tomorrow, right this second. It's irritating and yet she apparently is a sadist for it._

" _I missed you too."_

 _Her eyes drift shut, finally letting exhaustion take over and it is glorious, she needs it, desperately so._

 _4:02 am._

 _Why? Why is she awake and Robin has yet to stir from the tiny small cries echoing from the monitor beside him? Bloody outlaw and his ability to sleep through damn near anything if he so chooses._

 _Maybe their little one will fall back asleep?_

 _She lays there, eyes closed, listening to the small wailing. They are trying to do the whole self-soothing technique. But she can't. Finds it absolutely heart breaking having to ignore her child's shrill howling, tiny and quiet as it may be. Parent's who can do this are downright ruthless, at least in her opinion. Crying means they need something. How can she not go to them? She knows they all poke fun at her for it. The once Evil Queen can't even let two minutes of baby tears flow before she is on her feet._

 _Slowly, so as not to wake her husband, who should have to get up if she also is, though it's besides the point right now, but still, she extricates herself from his grasp, gently sliding onto the plush carpet and pads down the hallway._

 _It's a hushed whimper that escapes when the nursery door slides open and her eyes land on two button chocolate ones, thick with watery tears, staring impatiently up at her with a quivering lip and all._

" _Hi, baby." She coos quietly so not to rouse the other still blessedly sleeping child. His little legs bounce as a meager sob hiccups out, ten tiny fingers reaching out and grasping onto her arms as she gently pulls him over the railing. "It's okay, no need to cry my little one." He does, kind of, laments once more before burrowing the light blonde soft head of hair into her chest as she sits down on the rocker, swaddling them both with his green quilted blanket Granny had made as a gift._

 _It's just how Henry used to be, always wanting to be held, gripping onto her hair and shirt with all the strength possible. She loves it. Feeling needed like this again. No matter how tired her body may be, this she can never say no to._

 _They sway gently, back and forth as she hums a quiet song, rubbing her palm up and down on his back, over the blue fleece covered feet and back up to his head. It won't be long till she can't hold him like this anymore, has to relinquish this moment to a mere memory._

 _Nine months have already flown by far too quickly, time is passing within the blink of an eye and a part of her hates it. That one day there will be no baby for her to cuddle up to, they grow up, build their own lives, and find their own happily ever after._

 _But for now, she will sink into it, smile at the small puddle of drool that sticks to her collarbone and the smell of baby powder coating her nose as she leans down into the soft head of hair._

 _ **_End Dream_**_

When she wakes Robin is sleeping soundly beside her, little puffs of quiet snore escaping. His eyes look puffy, a ghostly gaunt complexion painting his skin. He'd fallen asleep crying. So it wasn't a nightmare after all. She doesn't wish to wake him, but the hushed cry that slips, muffled as it may be, from her as him stirring, grey, hazy blue eyes blinking open and she kicks herself for rousing him.

It takes nothing but looking into his eyes to have her tears falling once more. He doesn't say anything, just curls her into his chest, lacing his fingers through her hair as she cradles into him, the small swell pressing between them both. She cries, he lets her, hides his own tears into her hair, runs a palm up and down her back.

"I thought I lost you."

Her grip tightens around the white tank on his chest, a hard sniff to still the tears that stain her cheeks.

"I thought I had lost all of you."

.

..

…

..

.

It's Roland's little giggles that stirs her once more, muted tiny squeals that have her eyes opening, heart clenching with a sad smile. The grey stuffed monkey is tucked in his hands, smothering Robin's face playfully who reaches around and swings his son about, pressing a quick kiss to the unruly mop of hair.

"Papa, can we go for breakfast?"

"Of course, my boy."

His eyes flicker over to Regina, who is still laying in bed, hugging a pillow to her chest as she silently watches them play. His smile falters for a moment, falls into something a bit more torn. She lets go of his eyes as he picks Roland up, carrying him to their bed, the toddler more than excited she is awake, an excitement that barely flutters in her gut as Robin sits down beside her.

He leans down, presses a kiss to her temple, chasing away the hot tears that flush quickly. "Good morning, my love." He whispers into her ear, brushing away the fallen locks of hair.

"Regina! Want to come for breakfast?"

She's not hungry, feels… just tired. So, so tired. She doesn't answer, her throat far too scratched and dry for words, instead she simply leans into Robin's hand on her back, trying to soak in the gentle strokes of calm he desperately attempts to give her. It doesn't work. Not really anyway. Not when her stomach flips and swirls with a single bubble of magic where there should be a second beside it.

 _ **_Regina's Dream_**_

" _Mama!"_

 _It's a high pitched squeal that has her turning quickly, brushing off her flour dusted hands on the apron as she sees the blonde head of hair come racing into the kitchen, "Mama look!" She does, at the muddy footprints that have been tracked into her house in her son's exuberance, a flicker of irritation at the mess heats her. How many times does she have to tell him to take his shoes off? Messy little bandit. Like father like son she scoffs internally, letting the annoyance slide. Robin can clean it up, it's his son after all, well their son, but cleanup is his duty._

 _She smiles at her boy, brown button eyes half covered by far too long blonde hair, coated in a layer of muck, he needs a haircut, desperately so. His chubby dirt riddled hands shoot up in the air, cupping around something she isn't really certain she wants to know about. "I caught one!"_

" _What did you catch, my little archer?"_

 _His giddiness transfers into her floor as he bounces with a squeal "A frog!"_

 _Why? Why her?_

 _He is beaming, shoving mud swallowed hands into her face as she kneels down to his level, careful to avoid the puddles that already stain the white tiled floor._

" _A frog?"_

" _Yup!" He boasts proudly, "Daddy couldn't get it. He's too slow, but I got it! Wanna see?!"_

 _She doesn't, not really, hates amphibians, they are gross and slimy and full of germs, but he is smiling like the sun, little chest puffed out proudly and while she'd rather groan and tell him to toss it back outside where other distasteful things belong, his eyes are sparkling in excitement, and there isn't a will in her body to dampen that spirit._

" _Of course!"_

 _It leaps, a little green, bug eyed, black spotted thing. Springs from her son's hand at the moment escape is opened, and she falls back with a surprised shriek as it lands in her lap. It's gross. So so gross and slimy. She is throwing out these pants immediately, washing be damned._

" _Can I keep him?!"_

 _No, she is not going to allow this disgusting amphibian into her home._

" _I named him George!" Dirty little hands suddenly grip her face, smacking into her cheek's, hauling her gaze from the repulsive reptile to wonder filled eyes that melt her in a second. "Please, mama!"_

 _She sighs, why her?_

 _ **_End Dream_**_

She wakes at the rustling of someone around, cracking her eyes open to see Granny bustling about her vanity for a moment, why she doesn't honestly know, but can't really find the energy to do anything about it. The old woman sighs, turns and stills for a moment as she finds Regina's eyes watching her from the bed, and shifts over, carrying a glass of juice and a tray of fruit she lays on the bedside table, sitting herself down on the blankets cocooned around the Queen.

Regina doesn't say anything, just watches, knows that if she asks, Granny will leave, but it is a strange comfort to have her around. A woman who has been with Regina since the start of her unwanted reign. One who has kept secrets for her for decades. She doesn't even flinch when her hand is gently reached out for, a squeeze that follows though the old woman simply looks out the window into the blaring sunlight and blue skies. Sliding her glasses off her nose to rest about their chain on her chest, Granny sighs, a heavy heart burdened thing, pinches the bridge between her eyes and shakes her head. "I do not know why fate keeps doing this to you." Regina shifts, slinks under the blankets and presses her cheek to the soft goose down pillow, her body aching from everything. "I do not know why, and it makes me so angry." Granny sniffs, patting her eyes with the god awful floral patterned sleeve of her dress.

"Perhaps I deserve it."

Regina's voice is shaky, dry and coarse, the tears having long driven out any moisture left. Her eyes feel like sandpaper, and she is so tired, down to the last living cell in her body, she is just so tired.

"I don't believe that. Neither should you."

"Why?"

"Because, at the end of the day, we all have darkness in our pasts, it lingers in each of our hearts, there is no one in this castle who is untouched by it."

"I have done worse than most."

"That may be true, but you also have more reason than most to have succumb to it. The darkness."

She doesn't want a trip down memory lane, not now. Would prefer to live out the rest of her days never having to think about why she is Queen in the first place. What was taken from her. Who was taken from her. She's had enough pain to last a lifetime without having to dredge up the past.

"I think that's what most people don't understand." She sighs, running her thumb over Regina's thin hand. "They are all so quick to judge without knowing the reasons why."

"I never told anyone. It's not like they'd care anyway."

"I think that is where you are wrong."

Blue eyes turn to catch brown, holding them for a moment with a sad smile, "I think if people knew, they'd have a much different perspective."

"It doesn't negate what I have done."

"No." Granny exhales, "It doesn't. But I still don't understand why with all the terrible things people do in this world, you are the only one who seems to take the brunt of the pain. Even after you have done everything to change."

"Perhaps fate doesn't care about me as much."

They shift into silence, Regina watching a flock of birds sail through the sky, a wistful thought of how desperately she'd like to be free, of this, of all of this, the pain, the anger, the loss. For a moment she thinks of Daniel, how different her life would have been if they'd had the chance to run away. Maybe it would be his child swirling about inside her instead of Robin's. Maybe they would be sitting somewhere on a hillside outside their cottage, watching a hoard of children play in the lavender fields below.

"You should eat something." Granny pats her hand, gives it one last squeeze and stands from the bed. "I'll come check on you again, if your thief allows it." She smiles, knowing damn well not even Robin could keep her away from seeing the Queen. Regina tries to smile back, but it barely cracks her lips, as she nods, slides back down into the pillow and closes her eyes.

.

..

…

..

.

The bed is empty when she wakes, the urge to pee overwhelming as she groans, extricating herself from the mattress and onto the far too cold stone floors. Perhaps a bath is in order as well. Her bones crack and pop as she stands, a stiffness in her spine that lingers as her feet pad quietly to the basin room, her eyes finding herself in the mirror. She looks terrible. Pale and sickly, if she's ever seen it. And tired. The bags under her eyes are thick and puffy, exhaustion lining her once glowing skin. Her fingers try to comb through hair that is an absolute owl's nest. She looks down right awful. The swell of her belly presses into her thighs as she sinks down into the hot water of the bath, her hands finding the bump automatically, cradling it gently as she leans back against the granite wall behind.

The small bubble of magic pops against her hand, bouncing erratically about. She'd have all her toes and fingers now. Would resemble an actual person, a little tiny human being. A daughter. Who should have a brother with her. Would they have been identical? Or completely their own people? Miniatures of their parents or a perfect swirl of each? She supposes she will never know what her son would have actually looked like, what his voice would have sounded like, the color of his eyes, his hair, if he would have been a bookworm or an adventurer. Who he would have fallen in love with. What his whole life could have been like.

It's the last thing she thinks about as her head rolls onto her shoulder, a tired sleep claiming her once more as the warm bubbles surround her, coaxing out the aches and pains in her body, unable to reach the one that grips her heart.

 _ **_ Regina's Dream _**_

" _You're sure you want to go?"_

" _Mom, seriously I'll be fine."_

" _I know, but it's just far that's all."_

" _You'll be okay."_

" _I don't know about that."_

 _He smiles, dimpled and warm, tugging her into his chest tight with a chuckle. "It's only a 4 hour drive, you can come see me whenever you want."_

" _Whenever I want?" she huffs into his jacket. Robin's jacket. One that her son has commandeered over the past few years._

" _Okay well within reason. You have to call me first at least."_

 _She hugs him back, not ready to let go. He's still her baby, her little archer, who stands a good foot taller than she does, has blonde ashy stubble, broad shoulders and an apparent desire to leave her for some silly university._

" _You could go to school here you know."_

" _Storybrooke doesn't have a college mom."_

" _I'll make one."_

 _He laughs, kisses the top of her head, and sways them back and forth. "Yale is a good school."_

" _I don't care."_

" _Says the woman who basically typed out my entire application."_

 _The door swings open, the other three men in her life thundering through the door, all smiles and happy on this ever so sad, depressing day, in her mind at least. "Trucks all packed. You ready son?"_

 _Robin claps a hand on his shoulder and Regina simply hugs him harder, sniffing back the tears that threaten to fall. She promised him she wouldn't cry. He doesn't like seeing her cry. Ever. Her heart aches. Everyone is growing up, and she kicks herself for not putting a time stalling spell on every single one of them. The mansion is going to be empty now. No breakfasts she has to get up to make, no after school sports she rushes from the office to go watch, Tuesday taco night is over, all of it. It's just leaving. It's stupid. She hates it. They should all have to move back home. She is their mother and should have final say dammit._

" _I'll see you in two weeks for the opening season game right?"_

 _She nods her head knowing she wouldn't miss it for the world and breathes in his spiced cologne she used to jest him over. But now, now she isn't going to get to smell this again, not for two whole weeks. What if he changes it? What if he decides to change completely?_

" _Regina, love, we have to get going. Campus is going to be bogged with students."_

" _So he should stay."_

 _She hears them laugh, feels her son squeeze her once more before stepping back, tipping her chin up to meet his eyes, chocolate brown ones that match her own, the only thing about her son physically that is linked to her. Everything about him is Robin. Everything but his eyes. "I love you mom."_

" _If you loved me you would stay right here."_

" _Come on, don't do that."_

" _Sorry." She pouts, exhaling hard as they step back, a hand hastily wiping away thick hot tears._

" _Hey, no tears."_

 _She sniffles, a pitiful thing really, "I can't help it. I'm going to miss you."_

" _No more than I am going to miss you. I promise I'll call you when I get there okay?"_

" _Call me on the drive."_

" _Mom."_

" _Okay fine, but the second you get to campus—"_

" _I promise."_

 _He hugs her once more, kisses her cheek and follows Henry and Roland outside to the truck in the driveway, all loaded up with his things, his life, ready to roll out onto something new. Her heart aches as she watches them go, all waving from the vehicle, smiles plastered on their faces, and she tries to smile back, but the tears get in the way as they turn left and out of sight._

" _You okay?" Robin's hands wind around her torso, hugging her back into his chest, as she shakes her head no, "I miss him already."_

" _I know love, but he will be fine." He sways them back and forth, peppering her neck with small affections, "Just think, we have a son at Yale." His grey speckled eyebrows bounce at her, dimples smiling though hidden by blonde gray stubble, "It's rather impressive for a thief and a mayor don't you think?"_

" _I suppose."_

 _He chuckles, presses a kiss to her cheek, "Come on M'lady, let me get you a glass of wine."_

" _Bring the bottle."_

" _As you wish."_

 _ **_End Dream_**_

Water is not around her when her eyes flutter open once more, no liquid hugging her tight, but a soft cashmere throw instead, and the heat of Robin behind her, arms folded across her torso, hands holding her own on her belly, the rise and fall of his chest moving her up and down gently. They are outside, on her balcony, on the chaise where they used to sit a long, long time ago, when things seemed much simpler than they do now.

She doesn't want to talk. Not really. Knows they probably should, but not now. She'd rather sink into his embrace, turn and nuzzle into his neck and pray that maybe it was all this just a nightmare, though she knows that's not true. He doesn't say anything when she does stir, adjusts and slips sideways into his arms, enough to have her ear pressed against his heartbeat, a fleeting thought if their daughter can hear it too. She must, the way her stomach rolls and flutters, she must be able to hear her father. His hands coast up and down her back, across her shoulders, through detangled damp hair, and back again. It's nice. Makes her feel safe.

He breathes heavily, a pained wistful thing she can feel rattle his lungs, and for all the pain she holds alone in her heart, he too lost a child. A baby boy he could have taught to sword fight and shoot a bow and arrow on horseback. A son he'd spoil to the ends of the earth, impart every drop of wisdom he knew, tell glorious tales of him and his Merry Men, and sit underneath stars at night around a campfire. Regina sinks at the thought of her selfishness over this situation. She's holed herself up, away from everyone, refusing nearly anyone to come into her room. Had cried and screamed till her throat bled and brain finally took over and knocked her out. It was all about her. But what about him?

She feels guilt naw at her as she listens to the steady thumping of his pulse. Strong as ever. After everything he's had to endure alongside her. He not only lost a child, but a sister. One he'd lost before, had wrapped himself in shame over the fact he'd never found her, or searched harder, done more to bring her home. Funny how fate brings so much and yet can take it all away without batting an eye.

She hates the witch though. It's her fault this happened. Is the soul to blame for why the pain in Regina's heart will never cease to ache. But. Though she is loathe to admit it. The witch was Robin's sister. And regardless of the evil that resided in the other woman, it was still a relative he'd lost, killed by his own hand.

Shifting, she sits up, using his chest as leverage to rise her tired self from his arms. He watches her quietly, blue eyes hazed over with light confused greys as the distance between them increases.

It feels odd, the words in her throat that want to slide out though they taste like hot ash and bile.

"I'm sorry about Sarah."

She was right. It does taste like burnt tar on her tongue.

His eyes close, lungs fill greedily with air, his hand squeezing hers tight as he shakes his head. "Not now. I do not want to speak of her." She can hear the sadness that clings to his throat, the lump of anger that swallows them down. Perhaps that was poor timing on her part.

Leaning over his still shut eyes, her lips press softly to his, fingers scratching gently through the grey blonde hair on his temple, sliding to hug him closer to her at the base of his neck. Her nose bumps his own affectionately before she sinks back down into the crook of his neck, dropping a chaste kiss to his skin as she settles in, staring out into the falling sun that paints the skies golden tangerine and rich merlots.

A solitary black silhouette of an eagle glides between lavender clouds, flying further out into the distance, into the sun till it disappears completely, she falls asleep watching it go.

TBC.


	18. Chapter 18

**Chapter 18**

It's been a strange couple of days for them, caught in the in between of a horrible situation, a teetering edge of happiness that battles complete sorrow. There are moments when she can't stop crying, melting down into an uncontrollable mess, angry and bitter that life would throw another loss at her. He is there beside her regardless of her anguished rage, letting her scream until her voice gives out, and cry till there are no more tears to stain his shirt. And yet, the next second she will be smiling so brightly her cheeks threaten to crack, at the smallest things, a daisy bouquet gifted from Roland, the warmth of the sun that coats through her bedchambers. She's even managed to sleep more than a few hours at night, though she still dreams of him, her child lost to her forever.

It's not any easier, but it's getting there.

Today is probably the biggest step for her, moving on, or forward at least, a step in what everyone will tell her is the right direction since she lost her baby boy, having breakfast. More specifically, having breakfast in the great hall with everyone, where all eyes will more than likely watch her, whisper about her, wondering about her state of mind. She hadn't wanted to go, but the insistence of Roland and his pouting button eyes had finally cracked her wish to stay in her room forever.

It's with an anxious heart she slowly treads down the hallway, hanging onto a tiny hand that holds her up with more inner strength than Roland can understand. Robin's hand is gentle on her back, guiding her towards the obtusely large wooden doors. She can hear them on the other side, all laughing and cheering, while the last thing she feels like doing is toasting the rise of another sun. The bubble of magic swirls in her stomach, little bursts of soft flowers sparking inside. She's trying to help, her daughter. Can clearly sense the apprehension in her mother as they walk towards the hall. The feeling has tears brimming behind Regina's eyes, a silent thank you whispered between mother and child as she roams her hand over the ever growing bump. Five months pregnant (more than halfway there), and not long till she can hold her little girl in her arms.

Slowly, behind an overly excited little boy who clings to her hand, she walks through the dining room, trying to not make eye contact with too many people as she sits down on the far end of a table. She no longer sits at the head table, but amongst the Merry Men's location. They are safe. They don't ask questions, just smile, wish them all a good morning and carry on with their meal. She appreciates that.

Breakfast apparently is going to be a plate of fruit, the craving for blackberries overwhelming while the eggs are still a no, however. Surprisingly, it's nice, to be sitting with other people, listening to their mindless chatter, as she picks over her food. It calms the dark silence that she's sat with over the past few days. Allows her mind to wander anywhere but what happened. A small slice of reprieve.

Not that it lasts all that long. It never does.

She feels her coming before the seat beside her is claimed. An unnatural burn flares in her gut at her presence. She'd like to tell her to go away, she's trying to have a nice meal with her new family, she doesn't need the pouting, pitiful eyes thrown her way. Not now anyway.

"It's good to see you." Snow comments quietly, not daring to make eye contact. Regina doesn't respond, just picks up another strawberry and chews it slowly. It's insufferable. The amount of pain exuding from the other woman. It's not what Regina is here for. She doesn't want to hear it. The guilt ridden sorrow that clearly thrives in Snow. It's palpable. Seeping out with every quiet forehead creasing look Snow gives her.

She's been avoiding the woman. Well, that's not actually true, she just hasn't been seeking her out the past few days. There have been more important things to try and deal with than sorting Snow White's feelings out. Feelings she knows are difficult to figure out with what happened. But the last thing Regina wants to do right now is think about what she's lost, who she has lost. She's here for Roland, to listen to him babble happily over the fact she's finally come out of her room, the things he wants to do today, a picnic by the lake and maybe some fishing.

Snow fidgets with her cream gown, picking at her nails anxiously, a trait that grates on Regina. Even as a child Snow used to do it when she had something idiotic to say, an apology or demand Regina didn't want to hear nor fulfill as her step mother.

But the woman beside her is draining all the sunshine out of her morning, out of Roland's morning, and that is simply unacceptable. Resigned that breakfast is being cut short, she leans over Roland, stealing a blueberry and kissing the little boy's head as he babbles on happily. Flicking her eyes toward Robin, who hasn't moved from his spot across from her, watching for Regina's reaction instead of acknowledging Snow, she smiles softly at him. It may seem rather rude, ignoring the princess, but it jars something in Regina, something gentle and sweet. He's waiting to see what she needs first, and she loves him just a little bit more for it. Her daughter apparently agreeing with the fluttering in Regina's heart, sending out her own gentle, ticklish wave. They are definitely going to have a Daddy's Girl. Of that much she is relatively certain.

"How are you feeling?" Snow tries again, turning her body towards Regina, the rather large bump she sports brushing Regina's arm. For them only being a month apart in due dates, Snow is far… rounder than Regina. Showing more in her face, waddling a bit more in her stride. Where people comment Regina is all bump, Snow is the exact opposite.

"I'm fine. And you?"

"Good." She bites her lip, "Everything with the baby is healthy."

Regina nods, willing the bile in her throat to settle. "Well that's good."

She doesn't want to talk to Snow about this. Her fingers twitch unsteadily as she hides them in her lap underneath the table. Robin seems to notice the precarious stiffness in Regina's spine and bless his soul, he interjects, "Roland, my boy, how about we head down early to the lake, catch all the fish before Little John and Alan get there hmmm?" The cheer from the little boy has a small smile stretching her lips, as he clambers up onto the bench, fork and spoon raised high in his hands in triumph. She stands beside him, holding onto his small bundled up waist, Robin following suit. They bid the table goodbye, a last glance down at Snow White who has tears glistening in her eyes sadly as Regina departs without another word.

Their picnic is nice. Calm and serene with warm sun and a gentle breeze that tickles the back of her neck. She watches from a distance, Roland and Robin playing in the river, splashing in the easy current, laughing as the minutes tick on. She feels… she isn't sure. Somewhere between happy and solemn. A quiet turmoil that swirls in her stomach, blocked by the ray of peace in her heart. A small ray. But a ray nonetheless. At least here there aren't any sad eyes thrown her way that she doesn't know how to deal with. Roland doesn't know any different, there is still a baby in her belly, he is still going to be a big brother. That's good enough for him. Robin on the other hand is reserved. Watches her with a shy curiosity. Tentatively touches her, tosses a gentle smile here and there. But for the most part between them, it's odd, a fractured sense of ease.

They haven't talked much about it. He's tried, usually when they are tucked away in bed, away from lingering ears. But she doesn't want to talk about it. It makes her resentful, not of him, never of him, but of their situation. Of what they have to deal with, the pain, the anger, the sorrow that flows between their eyes whenever she looks at him. She'll brush him off, retreat to the balcony away from him and his wondering. If they talk about it, she honestly doesn't know how she will react. It's hard. God awfully so. But it's beating a dead horse. They lost a child. That's the end of it. Why talk about it? Just move on. It's what she does. Stows all the anguish away in a box in the back of her heart and tosses the key away.

So no, they haven't spoken about it. She pretends to be asleep when he is laying beside her, caressing her baby bump, listening to his muffled tears over how sorry he is he couldn't protect them, how he wishes he could take Regina's pain away. She cries into her pillow when he rolls over, silent and unwilling to crawl into the safety of his arms. It's better this way, she thinks at least. To not talk about it.

"Have they caught anything?"

The intruding voice jars her from where she sits underneath the large willow. And why life won't allow her a goddamn moment of peace without Snow White around she will never understand, but here she is regardless, standing a few yards away, fumbling with her dress over her own bump. Apparently Regina's glare is nothing to stop Snow from settling on the soft grass beside her. She's unsteady, squatting very un-regally with a huff as she sits far too close to Regina. Silence surrounds them, Regina refusing to start any type of conversation besides a small, "No, not yet." in answer to Snow's earlier question.

"I don't know how to say thank you for saving my child's life, and how sorry I am."

Her heart aches, bleeds profusely for a moment before the light tickle of rose petals in her bump flows out. Sniffling against the burn in her eyes and the lump in her throat, she wills herself to speak without falling into a million pieces as she looks over at Robin standing knee deep in the steam with Roland in his arms, laughing beautifully into the afternoon skies. She can see him. Her little blonde outlaw. A ghosting silhouette on the shore line, sitting in the sand, smiling all dimpled and chubby cheeked at her. He's nearly tangible, messy hair and soft chocolate brown eyes that sparkle in the sun.

Her tears fall.

"We were going to name him Reid, and he would have been incredible."

Snow chokes back a small, sad cry, her fingers crawling through the blades of grass to find Regina's, who simply looks down at their newly interlocked hands.

It's not okay. It never will be. She saved Snow White's child at the cost of one of her own. It should enrage her. But for all the once _Evil Queen_ had once done to ruin Snow White's entire world… that just… isn't her anymore. There is no more overwhelming rage to rip out the young woman's throat. It's simply not there, the burning in her gut and icy grip wrapping her heart in hatred. She is too tired for that. She misses Henry. Misses the chance of raising another baby boy from the start. She is just tired, and sad, and wants to close her eyes and let everything melt away, hatred included.

 **** 3 weeks later ****

Regina is off. Robin is off. _They_ are off. Something is stuck between them, something they both are aware of, but neither have been brave enough to broach the subject of. She cries alone when she thinks he can't hear her. He stews in solitude when he doesn't realize she is watching. The prophetic elephant in the room. They lost a baby. He wants to talk, she doesn't. It's the stubborn tormented bull against a strong headed anguished stallion. Neither want to back down, but they still traipse around one another on egg shells. One wrong word sets her off. He doesn't want that. So they are quiet. Rarely touching in the past few weeks. It's awful. But neither know how to stop it.

They do… but… it's just… hard.

Robin is at a standstill. Stuck between wanting to cry at her pain and scream that she won't let him in anymore. He stands at an impasse. Uncertain of what to do. He tries to talk to her, but she shuts down, shuts him out, and he is left wading through waters he isn't sure he can swim through for much longer. Does he push her to talk about it? Do they need to sit down and let all the anguish out? Will that help? It won't change anything, but he is getting so very frustrated trying to crack the brick wall she has erected about her heart once more. Surely he, over anyone, has some sort of right to ask her about it, to find out what she needs from him.

It's been a month since they lost their son, since he lost his sister by his own hand, and he has been bottling up everything so tight in fear of saying the wrong thing. But he is splitting at the seams. His Merry Men know more of his feelings than his own soulmate does. It's not right. It doesn't feel right. He knows it's hard for her, the self-loathing she has that eats away at her daily, but if he simply lets her hide in their bedchambers how is he supposed to protect her from drowning away in her own guilt?

What happened is not not her fault. It's no one's fault really. The blame can only be placed on heartbreak and misunderstandings. It won't bring their child back, nothing can, but as the past weeks have drifted by slowly, he is beginning to worry that he may lose more than just his son, he may lose her to the shadows of her mind.

Rosetta has been an ear he can go to. When Regina has turned her back and cried into her pillow at night and Robin feels utterly helpless and rather irritated towards her for it. He and the fairy have talked long into the starry night sky about what he feels, what he thinks Regina is feeling. Rosetta listens, wipes away her own tears silently and runs a hand down his back every time, promising him that it will be okay, that he need not give up hope just yet. Regina will come around. But it's all just words that fail to stick.

Snow has tried to come around, and he has done his best to accept her apologies on both his and Regina's behalf, but the princess worries just as he does. They'd spoken yesterday over the idea that maybe Regina needs to get away from the castle. To leave these walls that hold so much pain for her behind. Maybe a change in scenery is what she needs, somewhere safe and quiet where their family can attempt to heal together. He thinks it's a good idea, they can go to his family's cottage for a few months, and just sit, under the sun and between the grass blades. He wants it in fact. To leave this god forsaken castle that has taken so much away from him. Everyone in the council had agreed and even pushed him to do it. They can hold the fort down with no villain presently banging on their doorstep. Regina needs it. He needs it.

It's with their blessing and his resolve he finds himself walking slowly up the concrete stairs to their room, a sadness lingering in each step he takes as the oak door comes into view. He just hopes she will understand why they should go, hopes to the high Gods that she will be okay with his decision. Sighing heavily, his palm presses the door open and he shuffles inside, finding the room rather empty. That is normal, though, she doesn't sleep much in bed anyway, prefers the chaise on the balcony where the fresh air comes without the poisoned pain that leaches inside.

True to thought, she is sitting curled up on the balcony, a soft green blanket hugged around her legs and her hands settled on the beautiful large bump. It's without a real greeting that he sits down beside her, kissing her temple softly before leaning back into the cushions. She gives him a small smile as her eyes turn to meet his, a dim flicker of happiness hidden behind a grief-stricken shield.

"Hi."

"Hello, My Love." He smiles back, reaching to grasp her hand in his own. They are so soft, gently rounded in her knuckles, a slight glow glazed over her skin. She is beautiful. Pregnant and supple. From the swollen ankles she gripes over to the tips of silk that run through her hair, fluttering easily over the apples of her cheeks. It suits her. Being with child. Maybe even more so that it is with _his_ child, but nonetheless she is truly stunning to him.

He wonders if their daughter will look like her, all caramel complexion and chocolate eyes hidden behind thick dark lashes. He's dreamt of her, their little one that will be here so soon. Perfect pink lips, tiny button nose, ten chubby fingers and toes. Sometimes he swears he can hear her laugh, a soft melting sound that swirls in his mind as he wakes. Other times it's her weight he can feel, all snuggled into his arms, little puffs of breath against his chest, a soft crown of wispy dark hair burrowed into his neck as they lay in the sunshine together. He hasn't even met her yet, but he knows, without a shred of doubt, he is a goner for his daughter, completely and utterly wrapped around her finger he's yet to touch.

"She's kicking." Regina laces her fingers into his, moves them around her stomach, to the left and a little lower than her belly button that pops out. He can feel their daughters magic, a strange sensation that tickles his fingers whenever he touches Regina's bump. It had unnerved him the first time, feeling the small pulses that sparked out against his palm. And in an odd way, it feels much like Regina's magic does. Softer around the edges, but no less incredible. She'd blushed when he had commented "like mother like daughter." and had kissed him chastely for the first time in days before the tears swam back into her eyes.

He sits, listens to the sound of Regina's breath ghosting out against his cheek as he leans over her stomach, curling his torso about her legs till he is kneeling on the ground instead of sitting beside her. His palms rub gently over her swell, and she sighs, closing her eyes and tilting her chin down as she follows his path with her hands. "Well at least she was a few moments ago." Regina shakes her head, wrinkling her nose in that way that sets Robin's stomach fluttering.

"Come on little one." He listens to her voice, soft and low between an easy smile, "Your daddy wants to feel you." It takes a minute, Robin's hands never ceasing their circulation motion and his heart flips as a tiny nudge from their daughter thumps against his palm, a breathless chuckle parts from Regina's lips and for a split second Robin feels nothing but happiness.

"There you are. Hello, my love." He smiles, pressing a kiss into the spot where he knows a little foot is pressing against. "Are you doing okay in there? Keeping warm?" His eyes flick up to Regina's who is simply watching him quietly. She likes when he talks to their child, pretends most nights not to hear him whisper into her swollen belly about how excited he is to meet her, how scared he is for both she and Regina, and how he will do everything he can to protect them both. Most of all, without fail, he tells their unborn daughter how much he already loves her, loves her brothers, all of them, all three, and how much he loves her mother.

Settling down on the ground, his hand stays on Regina's stomach though he moves to rest his head on her thigh, humming as he feels her nails scratch through his hair. There are more grey ones these days. He'd scowled the first time Regina had absently commented on the salting of his hair, refused to believe that age was catching up with him, but maybe not so much age as stress. She likes it though. Apparently. The light shine that catches the light between his blonde stubble. More than once he's given into her awaiting tease about him turning into a "silver fox", why a fox he isn't sure, but it makes her smile, and he will do anything for that.

For a moment he's forgotten why he came up here, what he needs to talk to her about, leaving the castle for a while so they can just be together somewhere less obtusely painful. But this feels so nice, sitting here with her, feeling the soft petal of magic floating about from his daughter, watching the sun slowly set into the hills.

"We should probably settle on a name."

"I suppose you are right, only three months to go."

"Mhmmm, can't have her being little girl Locksley forever."

"Has a nice ring to it."

"Leaving her first name as Little?"

"I think Little John would be quite ecstatic over that."

She laughs and Robin wants to cry. It's been weeks since he has heard her laugh.

"That can be our fall back."

"What do we have picked so far?"

Regina hums, carding her fingers through his hair, "We are sticking with the R theme right?"

"I think so, if you'd like to as well."

"Okay, so we had Raelyn."

Robin frowns, leans into Regina's bump. "Are you a little Rae?" There is no swirl, so Robin smiles and leans back into Regina's hand. "I think that's a no."

"Raven."

Again, no swirl when he seeks the advice of their baby.

"Riannon."

"Hmmm….I'm not sold on that one."

"Okay, have you thought of any?" She questions.

"Well…" He turns on his knees sitting squarely in front of her curious eyes as he runs a hand along her belly, "My Grandmother was Rosalie."

"Rosalie?" Regina chews on the name, smiling as she feels the little flutter bounce about her stomach. Rosalie Locksley. It rhymes too much. Maybe just Rose. Rose Locksley. Yes that seems to settle happily in her heart. "Rose Locksley."

"Little Rosie."

"Rose, Robin. Not Rosie…."

"I think it's cute. My little Rosie Posie."

"You are absolutely not allowed to call our daughter that."

"I will do as I wish."

Regina laughs, shakes her head and revels in the tiny kisses he affectionately places on her baby bump. "She'll need a middle name."

"Well, if we are honouring my side of the family seems only respectable we do the same with yours."

She stills at the thought. Cora's mother was Marcella Windsor… a horrid woman Regina had absolutely no feelings for. Definitely not her. However, her grandmother on her father's side was a sweet soul. A soft kind woman who taught Regina how to ride horses for the first time, would sing songs into the night, and had sadly passed away before Regina's fourteenth birthday. Evelyn Mills. Swallowing down the memory, she smiles, "Rose Evelyn Locksley."

"I like it. How about you my little Rosie?"

Regina rolls her eyes, but her heart flips and it just feels right. They have a name.

"Speaking of our daughter…" Robin shifts, moving to sit beside Regina with a slightly anxious look on his face. "I was thinking, after talking it over with Snow, that maybe we should leave the castle."

She's stunned. Why he would talk about something this major with someone aside from her, and Snow of all people, has her blood boiling. They were gossiping about her. It flames in her gut.

"It's just, well, maybe it would be best if we moved to my old house in the country for a while?"

"And you and Snow just decided this?" She scowls at him, shuffling away from his side, staring incredulously out into the distance. How dare they? How dare they decide what is best for her, for her family without even discussing it with her before? How dare he talk about her to Snow White? The anger roars in her veins.

"I have consulted a few people actually. They all think it's a good idea."

She scoffs, annoyed, ignores the soft petal pops from their daughter.

"You need rest. We need to—"

"To what, Robin?"

"Hey, now before you get angry with me—"

"Before! Before I get angry with you." She spits, recoiling from his hand that reaches out for her. "How could you think I'd be okay with this? How dare you make that decision for me! Without even talking to me! What's wrong with you?"

He stills, cowers slightly at her anger, "Regina, we lost a baby. I'm sorry. I thought it was in your best interest to just rest, and look after the one we still have, because she is all the more precious given what happened."

Silence ensues then as she glares at him. Why is he bringing this up? She was doing just fine without having this conversation. It's how she deals with pain and loss. Alone. She doesn't need everyone to know that the strings that keep her together are fraying quickly. But for Robin to insinuate that she doesn't have their daughters best interest at heart is infuriating.

"So that's how I'm supposed to feel?" She huffs dejectedly, the tears burning against her eyes.

For the gentle quiet he once held, it fades quickly at her sullen irritation. "I don't know how you feel, Regina, because you never talk about it!" He huffs, "It's been almost 3 weeks, nearly a month and everytime I try to bring it up you just change the subject."

The tears fall before she can shake them off. "Because I'm dealing with it!" She stands, vacating her safe haven on the balcony, storming frantically into their bedchamber, her magic sparking hot at her fingertips. She hears him follow, and half of her wants to scream at him to get out, to leave her the hell alone.

"Shouldn't we be dealing with it together instead of you shutting me out?"

She spins on the spot, fuming against the hot tears that melt against her cheeks. "You want to talk about this?"

"Yes!" He sighs, exasperated.

Well he asked for it, and holding back hasn't exactly been her finest quality. So she does the only thing she knows and fires off, without thinking, lets the fragile walls crack, and if he wants to see her bleeding heart, she will give it to him.

"Fine! We lost a baby. We lost our son. We will never meet him. We will spend the rest of our lives imagining who he was going to be, always looking at one and wondering why there aren't two! How can saying any of this out loud be helpful?!"

He's stunned. Frozen to the spot as his heart breaks at the look on her face. This is exactly what he wanted to avoid. Causing her pain. He just wants to help her. With a shake of his head, he sits down on the bed, blinking back his own tears, "You're right, it doesn't feel very helpful. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to upset you."

He steps towards her, Regina backs up. She bites down hard on her lower lip with a angry tearful shake of her head. Why did they have to talk about this now? She knows it's probably a smart decision to just take some time for their family to heal. They need it. To sit together without distraction and let the wounds slowly stitch back together as best they can. But her walls from decades ago are still there, with cracks and tunnels clearly carved through. This is still new. Having someone. She had Daniel and he died. She had Henry, who is now lost to her forever. She has suffered so much loss, didn't think it was possible she would have to go through it all over again with another child. And now, she has Robin, and Roland and their daughter on her way, and it's completely terrifying.

"Regina I'm sorry. I just, I don't know what to do." He sighs dejectedly, hesitating in his footsteps though his eyes desperately try to hold her gaze. "We need to talk about this. I want to help you deal with this." He wants her to help him deal with it. Together. He needs her, he just wishes she would let him do the same.

"I didn't ask for your help." She lashes out hotly and regrets it immediately. The look on his face knifes straight into her gut, bleeding out her self-loathing for making him feel like she doesn't want him, doesn't need him, is silently begging him to walk over and hug her so tight she can't breathe anymore. But her hot tongue is enough to have his head shaking sadly, his hands falling limply to his sides as he sits down once more, not saying anything. He simply looks at her, heartache written across his soul, so tangible she can feel his anguish in her heart.

She wants to apologize, but the words catch under the lump in her throat, so she simply stares out pitifully ashamed into the dimming sky, begging her knees to hold her up though they shake torturously. Wiping away the wetness on her cheeks and she sighs, runs her hands through her hair, "I promised Roland I'd meet him for dinner."

Robin nods, but doesn't move. He feels lower than ever before as he watches her head to the door without another word.

What does he do now?


	19. Chapter 19

**Tethered To You Chapter 19**

She feels massive. A whale walking on two feet. Bloated, swollen, sweaty, and fat. How it's possible that Robin still looks at her with hunger in his eyes is completely beyond her. Why he would want to touch her when she weighs probably more than he does at this point is unbelievable to her. Her mood over the extra weight on her body is foul, the stretching of her skin uncomfortable, the ache in her back carrying their child is beginning to take it's toll. If their calendar tracking is right, she should have about 52 days to go. 52 more mornings she has to wake up to this feeling of their daughter swirling about happily in her stomach. That is probably the only thing she is going to miss. It's something only she gets to truly experience, having this bond of carrying their child.

It is bittersweet. She wants to keep this, her baby in her womb for years just so she can keep her safe, for once she is born, keeping her away from danger becomes much more complicated. So while staying pregnant would be nice, she also cannot wait to meet their little Rose. Or Rosie as Robin insists on calling her, much to Regina's irritation. It's sweet he has a nickname for her, but _Rosie…_ surely he could have decided on something that didn't alter her actual name. She wonders what she will look like. Whose hair she will have, what color eyes she will get to look into forever, regardless if they will be chocolate brown like hers, or bright stunning blue as her father's. What the sound of her voice is going to be like.

Even with all the excitement of meeting their daughter, there is still lingering sadness at never getting to meet their son. It dwells on her like a dark cloud as much as the sun shines over the thought of holding their little girl. It will always be like this. She knows that. Everyone tells her that time will heal the wounds, but the loss of a child isn't some scrap you can put a bandaid on. It will remain on her heart, a deep scar.

Robin is always there though. When the days seem far too anguished for her to wake up and get out of bed. He is there, stroking a calm hand over her belly, whispering sweet nothings when he thinks she isn't listening, promising to keep their daughter safe, to keep them both safe. And it's days like today, when that cloud seems oppressively dark, that all she wants to do is curl up in a ball and sleep. He'd suggested a bath, and that was the only thing that had her pushing the covers off and clambering towards the tub with the help of his hand.

It's blissfully warm, smells like lavender and filled with bubbles. Her round belly protrudes from the water, cascading the soapy bubbles over it's swell as Robin roams a wet dripping cloth over her tight skin. She's going to have stretch marks. Perhaps her magic can fade them even if Robin is indignant at the idea. They are a reminder of the life she carried he says, a painting on her skin that shows her strength and courage to go through this momentous feat. She simply scoffs a laugh and tells him to wait for childbirth and the broken hand he will surely be suffering from her gripping him tightly, see if he wishes to keep those broken bones then. Aggravatingly true to his pure-hearted nature, he just smiles and says it will be worth it. Granted it's not his body pushing out a watermelon out of a rather small hole now is it.

"How are you feeling?"

"Fat." She rolls back into the soft cushion pad on the lip of the tub.

"You are beautiful, my love."

"You have to say that."

He laughs, runs another scoop of bubbles over the baby bump and shakes his head, "You are. There is nothing more stunning that seeing you carrying our child."

"Is this your way of telling me I wasn't attractive to you before?" She arches a dark eyebrow playfully at him. Again he chuckles, that deep set, dimpled grin that has butterflies fluttering about her heart. "I do believe my attraction to you is what got us into this predicament in the first place." His hands move up over her belly to cup her rather swollen breasts. Another thing she has figured out he enjoys, the fullness of her, is touching her every chance he is allowed to, and even then some. Thumbing her nipples she sighs and sinks into the water, letting his touch and the warmth of the water soothe the aches in her joints. 52 more days.

"You know…" He shifts, leaving her breasts much to her disgruntled huff and removes his shirt, which is a good thing, a very good thing. "I've heard—" He unzips his trousers, letting her greedily peruse the way they cling to his hips for a second before falling to the floor, letting his half hard erection spring out. Regardless of her feeling beautiful, he certainly is. Thanks to her pregnancy, her arousal is in overdrive, slickening up her thighs, building a wetness that has absolutely nothing to do with water. "That sex is always a good way to relax."

"Is it now? I haven't heard of that bit of advice." She hums, licking her lips as he steps into the water behind her, squaring them back to front, his erection bumping her low back as he sinks down. Thank god for the buoyancy of the water, it makes it easier for her to slide her legs up and press back into him. He groans as he palms her breasts again, rolling her nipples between his fingers, his erection hardening at the moan she lets go. Clearly he isn't the only one turned on.

She shifts, lifting herself up higher so she can sink down onto him, her belly round and pressing into her chest and his hands as they try to maneuver in the tub. It's smaller than she remembers, or perhaps she is just bigger, and it's irritating that she can't push herself back enough to find the right angle to sit down on top of him. Growling, she leans forward, reaching for the other edge of the tub, a breathless, _there is no room,_ radiating her irritation at the lack of space. Robin chuckles at her annoyance and follows her body, taking a long appreciative look at her round squeezable back side.

He palms her cheeks, squishing and pulling them apart a few times as he watches the way she rolls her hips slightly, desperate to find some stimulation. Before she can bark at him again, he swipes two fingers through her slit, from opening to clit, rubbing hard, tight little circles that have her making these bloody noises that go straight to his cock. "Robin, please, don't tease me. I'm not in the mood."

It's a lie, they both know it. She loves being toyed with, teased to the point of anger before he will drive himself home. "Robin, I swear to God-aah! Fuck, finally. Thank you." He'd chastise her for the " _it's about time_ " tone lacing her voice, but she is warm and wet where he slides into her, and any thoughts of playful punishment are quickly swallowed up. His hands slip over her hips, doing his best to hold her to him as he slowly thrusts in and out, keeping the tempo rolling gently to not cause her discomfort, but enough that she is mewling and keening in front of him.

She moans, some dreadfully sinful thing that tugs him closer to the edge. Her fingers curling over the edge of the tub as she presses her breasts up against the granite. But the bluntness of the tub floor rubs hard against her knees and it's distracting from the pleasantries of Robin's cock rubbing up against her g-spot. "Wait," He rocks into again, "Robin." She arches away from him, "Hang on. Stop."

His hands grip around her waist as he ceases movement mid push, "Are you alright? Did I hurt you?"

God, he is adorable when he is worried about her. Smiling, she pats his fingers on her hips, chuckles out a breathless, "I'm fine, but it's hard on my knees."

The exhale of relief he lets go is endearing, "Well then perhaps a soft mattress would be better for my Queen." Towels left forgotten, he follows as she walks gloriously dripping wet and naked to the bed, laying down on her side, and motioning for him to spoon her from behind. It makes her supple behind squish beautifully back into his groin.

"Pass me a pillow."

He does, and she stuffs it under her legs, letting her belly rest on the softness without putting any extra strain on her back. "You ready?" He swipes through her folds, circles her clit a few times until she is moaning in the way he so cherishes, and with her nod, he pushes back into her, slowly.

This is better. Much much better. Has him grinding hack into her g-spot blissfully. His hands move, one to grip her hip, the other under the pillow that supports her head, lacing their fingers together as he rolls in and out. His eyes follow her own free hand, watching hungrily as she palms her swollen breast and toys with her pert hard nipple, the high stricken gasp she makes has all the blood rushing down to his cock. "God, Robin. Keep going."

As if he'd stop. Doubles his efforts if anything, helping her chase the proverbial peak, hoping to the highest gods that she tips over soon for he is so bloody close, what with her warm, wet tightness squeezing his erection with every slide. "Talk to me. Please." She begs, gripping his hand in her fingers harder. It makes him smile, through the sex induced haze of her naked body, grinning like an idiot in love as he bends over her as best as he can without losing their rhythm.

Ghosting his lips over the shell of her ear, he pushes into her hard, "You're stunning like this. So hot and tight around me." She nods, bites her lips. "So bloody gorgeous, Regina." Her hips pulse and arch. "I can't explain how perfect you are. How perfect your body is." He moves his hand from her fingers to land overtop of the one squeezing her breast, groaning at the full and supple softness of it. "God, your breasts, mmm, fuck."

She chuckles, removing her hand so he can have full reign. "You like them bigger."

He nods, licks a line up her neck, "I simply like you."

For a half moment they both still, eyes locking onto one another's as Regina smiles shyly up at him. "I like you too." Robin grins, kisses her fondly, and goes back to his task of her climax. It doesn't take her much longer, not with him pumping quick, rapid thrusts and whispering naughty things into her ear. She keens, writhes and pitches over the edge, moaning out how much she loves him. He follows her quickly, letting her cunt milk him dry.

Slipping out of her, he hums into her neck, running a hand over her bump until he hears her breathing even out and her eyes close, sleep claiming her exhausted body. She is tired a lot these days. Kissing her cheek once more, Robin extricates himself from their bed, cleans himself off and makes his way down to the gardens where their son is playing. Everything as dark as it once seemed, is falling back into place and he couldn't be more thankful for it.

.

..

…

..

.

"Regina, you look like you're about to pop!" Rosetta beams from across the table. "How are you feeling?"

"Like a water balloon." She laughs and sips a glass of juice. They are waiting for everyone to arrive. A council meeting out of the blue that the Charming's had requested her attendance at, if she was feeling up to it, of course. How Snow is still managing to maneuver around with the size of her is a feat unknown to Regina. They should be welcoming the newest member to their family any day now.

"Well you are simply glowing."

"It's the sweat, trust me."

The fairy giggles as she pats Regina's large tummy. They asked if she would be Rose's Godmother. Something the fairy had cried a waterfall over. It was sweet, her reaction. The wide eyes and jaw dropping before the lung squeezing hug and overjoyed acceptance. It had made Regina cry, mostly because her damn hormones don't listen anymore, but never the less, it brings her a sense of peace that their daughter will have another someone to look out for her.

The door swings open and Regina's quiet lunch is now set aside for whatever the reason the Charmings asked her to be here for is. Everyone is here in fact. The dwarves, Ruby, a few Merry Men, Granny who is holding Geppetto's hand (something Regina needs to make a note of to ask the older woman later.), and even the Blue Fairy who is carrying a silk purple satchel.

Robin kisses her cheek, bids Rosetta a happy hello and rests a palm over Regina's tummy, cooing out another greeting to his "little Rosie," something Regina rolls her eyes at, but smiles regardless. David is the first to speak, standing up beside Snow with a beaming grin only the pompous prince could give.

"We found a way to get back to Storybrooke."

Her heart stills at his words. It's impossible to do that. They'd have to cast another dark curse, and she is very much willing to venture no one here is volunteering to crush the heart of their most beloved, she certainly isn't.

"How? I thought it wasn't an option." Granny gruffs out with a confused frown. But David simply laughs heartedly and waves his hand toward the Blue Fairy who steps up to the table, stiffening her neck and she continues on David's explanation, "The Fairies have been able to locate another magic bean."

"Weren't they all destroyed with the Dark Curse?"

"Yes… and no." Blue shrugs, opening the velvet satchel in her hands, dumping out the single, glowing content onto the oak table. Everyone, save Regina, leans over, gasping in unison.

"Why does it look like that?" Grumpy questions harshly, thumbing the bean with a dirty thumb. It peaks Regina's interest, the way the Blue Fairy recoils back with a sinking look.

"It's been tainted by dark magic."

They all turn and stare at Regina who simply folds her arms over chest and exhales heavily as silence enraptures the group. Groaning she grabs the bean in her hand, feeling the pulses of darkness that swirl within the onyx sparkling sphere. "I didn't create the curse, but Rumple had told me before I cast it that there would be no way back to the Enchanted Forest once I did. Not without a price."

"And that being?" Grumpy scowls at her, quietly accusing her already. Idiot dwarf. She really doesn't like him.

"It's simple. If we use the bean, we will lose our memories of our time here."

"Another memory curse?"

She shrugs and laces her fingers with Robin's who is looking curiously between her and the bean. Her eyes follow the frown lines that begin to creep into his forehead, the way he nervously bites down on his lower lip and twitches his nose.

"How would we break it?" David asks through the silence. "We'd need to find Emma."

"And Henry," Snow comments quietly, staring sadly at Regina. Losing Henry has been the hardest thing on Regina this past year, the notion they'd never get to see him again had plagued Snow, but not nearly as much as his mother.

"They won't remember us." Regina sighs, begging her tears to hang back for a few more minutes. She doesn't want to cry in front of them.

"We have to try!" David exclaims, grabbing the bean back from Regina's hand, ignoring the flare of anger she breathes out hotly at him. "Don't we all want that? To go back?"

"I don't know. Another memory curse. I mean what's the point? We are back here, why not stay?" Another dwarf whose name Regina doesn't recall questions out meekly. "This is our home."

"But so is Storybrooke. Emma is there. Henry is there."

"So? That's your family. Not ours." Grumpy chimes in indignantly at the Prince. And Regina feels her magic pulse in her hands, the urge to throttle the short twit burning in her veins.

"I know. I know. But I can't spend my life without at least trying to get my family back." David exhales heavily, looking between the uncertain group and his wife's shining, teary eyes. "We broke one curse, and we can do it again."

Slowly but surely, much to Regina's surprise, they all agree. Cheers and handshakes exchanged and she sits frozen at the thought of what they are about to do. What they are going to lose, and who they might gain in the process. But what if it doesn't work? What if they get back and there is no way to break this curse? She'd lose Robin and Roland. How do you choose between one family and another? It's impossible.

"We should wait for the babies to be born." Rosetta stands beside Regina, squeezing her shoulder gently. "It's safer that way for them."

"Snow is about to give birth anyway. Regina you aren't far away either right?"

Robin shakes his head, still frowning as he mumbles out, "Six weeks."

"Then it's settled. We go home once the children are here." David chimes out happily.

Her stomach rolls, Rose's soft flower petal magic bubbling and popping out anxiously at her mother's sudden influx of nerves. Their daughter is as uncertain as Regina is. And while she may not be able to understand what is happening outside her safe warm womb, Regina can feel it. She is nervous. And for good reason. They are going to lose their family. Rose won't grow up with her father or brother. How does no one else seem to acknowledge that? Not that it comes as a shock to Regina. They are only looking out for themselves, her happiness is the last thing on their minds. Their families won't be broken up. Only her's will be.

Before the tears can be seen by the group, she swirls herself and Robin up in a cloud of purple.

.

..

…

..

.

Snow and Charming welcomed a beautiful baby boy a few days ago. A blonde, bobble headed, blue eyed prince they named Neal. She sent her well wishes, but hasn't yet seen the baby herself. Hasn't left the sanctuary of her room since the council meeting. Every day that passes is another she loses having Robin and Roland.

It's horrid. Knowing what they are about to lose. Robin is on her side as best as he can. He wants her to find Henry, promises that they will find each other again, but he too isn't exactly thrilled at the idea of separation from his girls. He is quiet in his thoughts though, wanting to be there for Regina, but his heart aches with every sun that sinks into the horizon.

"What if we stayed?"

"Regina. I know you are scared."

"I'm not scared, Robin. I'm terrified."

Her eyes water as she looks up at him from their bed, cocooned into his side as their hands lay tangled together on her stomach. "I know, love. But have faith."

"In what? I am going to lose you. Again!"

He sighs, kissing her hair softly. "In us, Regina. How many times have we been separated?"

"Too many."

"And yet here we are." He tries to smile, holding back his own fear at the possibility he may never see her or their daughter again.

"I can't raise her alone, Robin."

"You did a mighty fine job with Henry."

"That's not what I meant." She huffs, leaning into him further as she swallows hard, "I don't want to do it alone." Robin sighs and hugs his wounded love tight. "It won't be forever."

"You don't know that. If we can't find a way to break this curse, I may be raising our daughter without you."

"I won't let that happen."

Her tears fall in heavy droplets onto his shirt because it's a very real possibility that she will be a single mother again. But if they don't go back to Storybrooke she is giving up a chance to have Henry back. An impossible choice.

"I love you too much to never see you again, Regina. Have faith in us, My Love."

"I'm still scared."

"I am too."

.

..

…

..

.

 **Three Weeks Later**

The pain has been fluxing in and out for hours now. A tight coil in her gut, sharp spikes in her back that make her vision blur. It's too early. They are still supposed to have at least eighteen more days. She shouldn't be having contractions. Not now.

"Get her some towels."

She moans painfully, gripping Robin's hands that are settled on her unsettled belly. It had been two hours ago that she'd woken up arching in anguish, a wet puddle between her legs and that had been that. Their daughter was on her way and there was nothing Regina could do but scream at the contractions.

"You're doing great, Regina."

"Shut up. Shut up. All of you shut up."

Robin stifles a groan as she squeezes his hand, clenching like a vice as her teeth grit out another distressing cry. This is impossible. There is no way she is going to be able to do this. Not with the pain that already burns her body, the cement block pressing down on her lower half. It's stifling and overwhelming. The tincture to help ease the pain had done absolutely nothing.

"Regina, you're about ready to push." Granny pats her parted knees, and tips her glasses back up the bridge of her rather sweaty nose. She and Rosetta are the only ones Regina had allowed into the room, aside from Robin of course. They are the only ones she trusts.

"No."

Behind her Robin chuckles softly, kissing her sweaty temple, "It's gonna be fine, Regina."

"No. I can't."

Another hard contraction rolls through her, igniting her from toe to tip. Her magic hasn't been any help either. Apparently childbirth overrides magical ability. She grits her teeth, digging into Robin's hands, breaking the skin she is certain, but he doesn't move a muscle behind her, just lands a row of dotted kisses across her shoulder. "Breathe, my love."

"Don't _My Love_ me. You did this to me." Her exhale is sharp as her eyes squeeze closed, blinking back the tears that line her lashes. It's impossible. There is no chance in hell her body is going to be able to push a baby out of it. She swears, arches her neck into Robin's chin and growls out again as the pressure begins to build.

"I think your daughter may inherit your stubbornness, Your Majesty." Granny smirks behind her once again sagged glasses. "I can see her head, all you have to do is push."

"I said no dammit!" Regina bellows out at the pain.

"I think she's gonna have your hair too."

"What?" Her eyes flare wide at Granny. "What did you say?"

The older woman shrugs, "Well the crown is jet black."

"She has dark hair?"

"Well I won't know for sure unless you push."

"On the count of three. You can break my hands, I won't move."

"You promise?" Her voice shakes as she looks up at Robin who simply smiles and nods, "Crush away, my love."

"Okay, Regina. On the next contraction, push."

She swallows, her heart thunders, and the sound that escapes her throat would surely send anyone running as she flexes as best as she can over, pushing down as hard as she can before the pain is blindingly overwhelming and she loses her breath. Slumping back into Robin, she shakes her head, "I can't. It hurts."

"Come on, Regina, push." Granny soothes against her thighs, "She's almost here."

She has never been more grateful for having adopted Henry. If this is what all birthing feels like there is no chance in hell she is going through it again. The pressure mounts and she wants to cry. It seems to take forever, her insides clenching and squeezing. "Almost there. I have her shoulders. One last time, Regina. Push."

She pants, a guttural moan escaping, and then all she can hear is a little tiny wail as Granny sits up with the brightest teary smile Regina's ever seen on the old woman.

"Aww, Regina. She's beautiful." Robin weeps openly beside her as Granny wipes up their daughter and bundles her quickly in a soft lavender blanket, passing her over to her Regina who cradles they tiny babe against her breast.

"Hi, baby." She sniffs. This feeling is something unexplainable. Looking down at a little human that she made. All ten tiny fingers and toes. Pink cheeks, pouty lips, and the smallest nose Regina's ever seen. "You're so beautiful."

Robin's palm smoothes over the dark damp locks of their daughter, a happy tearful laugh escaping him as he takes in everything about her. "She looks just like you." He smiles, kissing Regina's sweaty forehead, "Stunning in every way."

"Yeah she is, isn't she."

"Congratulations you two, she's adorable." Rosetta wipes her tears as she sits down on the blankets beside them. "Absolutely precious. Hello, little Rose."

She is quiet, eyes closed and thick lashes coating a shadow across her cheeks. All wrapped up in the soft purple cashmere. "God, Robin. She's perfect." Her finger smoothes over the tiny knuckles, tracing the even smaller nails, and how something so bloody small could have her heart crashing in her chest this way is indescribable. "Hi, Rose. My beautiful little girl." She rocks them back and forth gently, unable to tear her eyes off of the miniature version of herself. It's with a tiny whimper and a stretch of her smaller than life pink hands that Rose grips around Regina's pinky, and the Queen can't help but cry.

The thought of what happens in the next few weeks with the portal and the memory loss, the furthest thing from her mind. All that matters is now, being here with her daughter snuggled into her chest, Robin's arms around them both.

The future will just have to wait.

TBC.


	20. Chapter 20

**Tethered To You 20**

* * *

 **Three Weeks Later**

"Hello my beautiful little, Rosie"

"Rose, Robin. We've been over this."

"Don't listen to your mother, Rosie."

If he wasn't so damn adorable holding the tiny purple blanket she'd smack him for not listening to her. But he is so bloody sweet cradling their daughter as he sways gently back and forth, a smile brighter than the sun beaming down at the small pink fingers that wrap around his own. Smitten doesn't even begin to cover what he is. Down right swooning and a complete sap for the tiny, whiny babbles that escape from the littlest lungs. It's almost ridiculous the amount of suffocating love he has for his little girl. All dark fuzzy hair, long lashes and bright blue eyes he spends hours on end stroking softly through.

Even the pouting scowl when he has to give her up is preciously cute. It's a sin to him, not to be holding his daughter. Doesn't particularly appreciate all the crowding and cooing of others when he has so much affection to bestow on her. Regina adores it. The way he acts when someone damn near has to beg him to hold her for a few moments. It makes her heart go all a flutter with beautiful feelings for him and his dimpled frown.

But it's lunch time for Rose, and her crinkly brow and small whines of hunger are the only thing that has Robin relinquishing his hold on her as he passes the small purple bundle over to her mother. He is infatuated with breastfeeding. Barely misses a meal simply because he tells her he's never seen anything so pure before. His eyes going all glassy and fond as Regina adjusts herself so that their daughter may fill her belly with milk. It is a bizarre sensation, or at least it was at first, breastfeeding. Rose had been fidgety in the beginning and Regina's nerves were all a muck. But practice does in fact make perfect, and it is much easier now. She sighs as Rose latches on, hums happily at the stroking of Robin's fingers through her hair as he watches from beside her, nuzzling in as close as he possibly can without intruding on Rose's space.

"I can't believe she is here sometimes."

"Neither can I. She's perfect." Robin presses a kiss to Regina's temple whilst he plays with Rose's tiny foot. "She looks just like you." He smiles, thumbing teensy toes.

"You think so?"

"Mhmm. She is a complete miniature of you. Gorgeous. Beautiful. Stunning in every way."

"Flattery will get you nowhere."

"Simply speaking the truth, my love."

Regina smiles, and Robin isn't the only one to say that she and her daughter resemble each other. Everyone in fact has commented on the likeness, Granny had even gotten a touch weepy the first time meeting Little Lady Locksley. She'd wiped her damp eyes with a handkerchief and a smile as she smoothed over the dark baby curls. "Just like her mother." That had made Regina's heart stutter. Granny knew her before the darkness, knew the young girl that had come to a Castle and into a marriage without wanting any of it. She had been Regina's only friend for many years, watching girl turn into woman, soft sweetness giving away to lonely anger.

"Her eyes are all you though. As are the dimples."

Robin beams, scooping back the finished feeder from Regina's breast and cradling her on his shoulder, a palm gently thumping on small ribs as he waits for the sweetest sound of a burp to escape. He lives for any noise Rose makes. Everything to him is a milestone. The first blink of her eyes, first stretch of her chubby limbs, the cries that wake them both up at night are a God send to him. He was made to be a father, that much Regina knows down to her core. He is both unfazed by anything and a complete anxious wreck when something goes not to plan. It's sweet. The amount of concern he has for their baby girl. It makes Regina feel safe, and love him all that much more for it.

For a blissful three weeks they've been able to think about nothing else but their family. Everyone has been gracious in giving space, the talk about going back to Storybrooke a foreign thought now that there are two new babies to be ogled at. Both Rose and Neal want for nothing, never lack in attention, are swaddled in it if anything. But some of the townsfolk are ready to return to their other home, and are becoming anxious at the waiting.

Fortunately for Regina, it appears neither Snow or Charming are quite ready to get back either. It's simpler being able to keep memories in tact, not needed to figure out how to break a curse and care for an infant at the same time. Snow had been the bigger advocate of the two, still tired from being a new mother and wanting at least a few months before she can handle going back. Regina is grateful for that, as is Robin. Both very unwilling to give each other up, even if the curse could be broken. Being apart isn't exactly something they want.

Robin had quietly wondered if they couldn't just stay while everyone else went back. He doesn't want to be without his family. Would be happy enough to live out their days here in the Enchanted Forest where he feels more comfortable. Being in a new place is unnerving to him, even if Regina has explained until her words run out about Storybrooke. The wonders of plumbing and electricity that don't require her magic. The many things they can do there as a family. But if they don't have their memories how is he supposed to navigate his way through this new world without her? It's daunting. And while he wants to stay and keep them close, Henry is there. Or at least the possibility of Henry coming back to her, and he can't in his heart keep her from her son. It would be cruel of him.

They have six months. That's what the council has decided. Six months before they use the bean and go to this other home. With each day that passes, a dark looming cloud creeps into his gut. How long will it take for them to find Emma, convince her that they are real once more, and break this horrid memory curse? Too long in his mind. A day without Regina and Rose is going to be an eternity, even if he doesn't remember this year they've had together. It will all go back to the beginning again.

He will be a single father, filled with loneliness and anger towards the woman he loves so terribly. The memories of apologies, of making amends, finding love within each other, creating their daughter, they will all be gone. It makes his heart clench in his chest as he looks at Regina, who is tying her hair back in a low slung braid, a small smile creeping on her lips as her eyes close and the sun bathes her in a glow. How can he possibly go back to hating her? Somewhere in his gut he hopes that their soulmate bond will keep them together, keep their memories of this year intact. He doesn't think it will, but he hopes.

The little puffs of air on his neck are soothingly sweet, a beautiful signal that Rose has fallen back into dreamland against his bare chest. Skin on skin contact apparently is quite important in these first few months of her development. He is astounded that she knows who is mommy and who is daddy, simply by the touch of their skin. He relishes in the feeling of small hands fisted against his chest. Adores the way her toes seem to stretch at the top of his ribs, the complete opposite to how she tucks into a ball when laying on Regina, who apparently has also succumbed to sleep.

It's good though. She needs it. When baby sleeps so should mommy. Quietly as he can without waking either of his girls, he gently tucks Rose into Regina's chest, smiling as baby nuzzles into her mother, and a delicate hand wraps about her small back. They fit together, Robin decides, like they were always meant to be. For a moment he wonders what it would have been like to see her holding two babies instead of just one. What their son would have look liked all tucked in his mother's warm grasp. A vision he will never be allowed to see in the flesh. Times that have been stolen from him, from all of them. Now the memories he'd hoped to make with his son will only be dreams and unfulfilled wishes.

Exhaustion waves over him, listening to the sound of Regina's heavy breathing lulling him to sleep. But the land of unconsciousness needs to wait a few hours longer it appears as a tiny knock at the door echoes through the quiet chambers. Gently as he can, so as not to disturb the peaceful dreams of his girls, he makes his way to the door, smiling as he sees his son holding a tiny bouquet of flowers in his grasp in Little John's hold.

"Little tyke spent hours finding the right colors for his sister. Apparently there are far too many shades of red that weren't befitting of a Rose." John huffs happily, handing Roland over to Robin with a pat to the toddler's head.

"Can I give Rosie my flowers, Papa?"

"In a little while, my boy, she's sleeping with Regina."

The mention of Regina's name has Roland's eyes sparkling as his neck cranes around Robin's shoulders to peer at the pair in bed. "Can we snuggle then?"

"Of course, my boy. Say goodbye to John."

"Bye!"

"I'll see you later little guy."

Together, Robin walks Roland over to the blankets that house their family, pressing a finger to his lips, and Roland nods in understanding that they need to be quiet. He's been incredible with the newest addition. A doting older brother, curious and soft with the little baby. Something that strokes Robin's pride, he's raised a wonderful young boy. Gently, Robin peels back the blanket resting on Regina's torso, and Roland aptly tucks himself within the cocoon, a gentle hand patting his sister's back, the other landing on Regina's forearm. He likes to touch. Always has. Finds comfort in the contact as Robin watching his eyes slowly drift off.

For minutes he doesn't really notice, he simply watches his family, breathing softly together, all dark brown mops of hair gathered together. Lightly, he lays his own hand over Regina's, on top of Rosie's back and over Roland's shoulders, hugging the things he holds most precious as sleep begins to claim him as well. His last thought simply that he wishes he could hold them forever, but a sinister magic bean has other plans for all of them.

 **Two Months Later**

Robin knew from the first moment he laid eyes on Rosie, that she was going to be spectacular. Case and point, she is thriving at one of his favorite activities, _Tummy Time_ , as he affectionately calls it. The minutes that he spends on his stomach, Rosie much the same, blown away by her ability to lift her head and look at him dead in the eyes. It makes his heart flutter with joy. She's getting stronger, bigger and chubbier. The rolls on her joints squishy and adorable. He's not sure he's seen a more beautiful little girl before.

She babbles, incoherent noises he swears are her calling him daddy, even if it makes Regina laugh as roll her eyes. They are a long way from actual words, but nonsense squeals are good enough for him. She's going to be brilliant. He knows it.

"Robin, it's bath time for her."

He beams, it's another favorite part of his day. Rosie loves the water. Happily splashes about in the small tub Regina had conjured up. "Are you ready, my little love?" He scoops her up, pressing a kiss to her pink fat cheek and walks to the bathroom behind Regina who is already set up and ready to go. It's like clockwork. She is meticulous in everything about their daughter, right down to the matching booties that coordinate with her soft cotton onesies. He's made note that more than once, his girls have come out in the morning dressed almost the same.

Throwing his shirt off as Regina places Rosie in the tub, he sinks down on the floor beside them, Regina's blouse rolled up already, for they both know bathtime can get a little wet, what with their daughter being able to kick her little legs emphatically about. She squeals when Regina lifts the yellow duck into the sky, chubby hand flailing about as her eyes follow in a sparkling dance at the toy. As predicted, Robin is sloshed with a wave of water as her feet go crazy in the bath, something Regina laughs at as he wipes his face off. A shocked, "Hey!" spiking from her as he flicks her back with a few bubbles that land on her cheek and brow. Rosie shrieks happily up at them. A smile gracing her delicate features, something both Robin and Regina melt over. The little girl's smile rivals the brightest ray of sun, dimpled, gummy and effervescent.

He's going to miss this when they lose their memories. Miss them.

"Have you been able to find anything out?" He questions quietly whilst running a soft cloth over the protruding fat belly in the water, though his eyes flicker up to see Regina's smile falter at her lips as she shakes her head sadly, a soft whispered, "No." answering him back. His heart sinks. They'd hoped there would be some loophole to be found. Something that would keep their memories intact, something that could keep them together. He tries not to ask too much, doesn't wish to upset Regina, he already knows she feels like she is failing, and that isn't what he wants. His only hope is some blonde woman he's never met before, and that just doesn't sit well in his gut. There are so many things that could go wrong, so much that he is going to miss out on. Milestones he'll never get the chance to witness.

"I'm nervous."

"About what, my love?"

Regina's hand tickles Rosie's belly as she sighs, her eyes shining with tears as she confesses only to his ears, "Raising her alone."

Exhaling heavily, he folds her hand in the water into his own, the joint expanse of them covering their daughters torso. "I have nothing but faith in you, Regina."

"At least one of us does."

"You did a mighty fine job with Henry, this will be no different."

"Except I'll be waking up with a daughter I didn't know I had, and will be wondering who her father is." Her eyes flick up to Robin's, a lone tear falling from her lashes he is quick to wipe away.

"You know what I think?" She shrugs, leans into his palm and waits with a sad pained look in her eyes. He smiles, or at least tries to, "I think that we are going to find each other."

"You sound so certain."

"No matter the time, Regina, I have always wondered where you were. You've always been with me, my love. That's not about to change."

"You promise?"

This time Robin smiles, for he does know this one thing. That no matter where he goes, she is cemented into his very being. There isn't a chance he would ever truly forget her. And if they have to start from square one, well then so be it. If this is the outcome, he'll gladly walk through the fire once more.

"I promise."

His lips meet hers, coaxing away her anxiety that rumbles just beneath the surface. Beneath them, Rosie has apparently decided that's enough heavy talk as she babbles and splashes in the basin, squealing for some attention that had been momentarily taken from her.

"Yes, my little Rosie, I know. Time for supper."

Regina rolls her eyes at the nickname, but he sees her smile as she cups their daughter up in a towel, and cuddles her into her chest. He drains the tub, and pads over to the bed just as Regina settles down, unbuttoning her blouse with a single freehand. It never fails to catch his breath, even if the revealing of a breast is simply for his daughter's empty tummy, Regina is stunning to him. Perhaps more so like this, all warm and motherly as she adjust Rosie in her arms, and sighs when she latches on.

Childbirth has gotten in the way of their sex life. Not that he really minds, but he is a man, and well, Regina is Regina. There is no chance he stands not being somewhat aroused by her. She seems to sense the fractional change in his breathing as he settles down beside them. Her hand patting his thigh a bit too high for hiding his growing need to feel her again. But he will wait until she is ready, dying in need to have her touch him again all the while. She chuckles as he shifts his hips away from her wandering hand, a blush on his cheeks flushing his skin hot at the mischievous sparkle in her eyes.

He understands her fear over them being intimate again. Or perhaps fear isn't the right word. Reservation over the change in her body is more on point. He sees the way she frowns at the not quite taut skin on her stomach, the lines that paint from hip to breastbone, faint as they may be. To herself she balks at the roundness she still carries, scowls at it even. The scrunch in her nose adorable to Robin when she tucks herself away from his perusing gaze at her naked body. He simply tells her that there is just more to love. Not that it makes her scowl lessen any when she bats his hands away with a huff.

"Maybe tonight, when this little one is asleep, you and I can have some time together." She hums out, her tongue darting out to swipe along her lower lip, an action that holds Robin's gaze to the wet trail left behind on the plump pout.

"Just us?" He swallows in reaction, begging his growing arousal to tamp down. It's an impossible feat though, what with her hand drawing lazy circles on his inner thigh.

She shrugs shyly, "Just a thought," and glances back up at him beneath thick lashes curiously.

A smile twitches at his lips as he nods, probably to quickly to hide his excitement at the prospect of having her all to himself for a few hours. "I'd love nothing more than to spend time with you."

"Perhaps we can convince Granny to watch both Roland and Rose for the night." She bites back down on her lip, leaning a little heavier into him, the swell of her exposed breast pressing into his chest.

Dear God he hopes so.

.

..

…

..

.

Dinner was… quick. Dessert seemed to be more on her appetite. Not that Robin was complaining, couldn't fathom resisting, what with her hair clouding his vision and her weight in his lap. Three months has been far too long. An eternity it seems now that he has the opportunity to scour her naked back with his hands. His starvation to taste her infinite and overwhelming as he suckles on a nipple, rolling the other in his hands. Pregnancy has made them swell, grow beyond what he can hold, and he loves it. The new weight of them, the sensitivity they've appeared to gain, the appreciation she has for his laving tongue over the hardened peaks. She groans, a sinful thing that goes straight to his ever growing erection. When she divested them of their clothes, he can't quite remember, but is incredibly grateful for it. He gets to feel the wetness between her thighs, hot and slick, grinding across him. Teasing with every roll of her hips he grips with fervour. His other hand ghosts down, sliding till he can tuck it between her eagerly parting thighs, as she moans and rubs against his palm.

She'll be the death of him. Her and these bloody noises she makes when he slides two fingers inside her and begins to pump at a steady rocking rhythm. It's snug, not enough space for him to curl his hand into her the way he knows she likes, doesn't allow the way he truly wants to feel her come apart on his fingers happen. Loathe as he is, he parts from her breast with a pop, nipping the bud teasingly as she squeaks and curls her arms around his shoulders, holding him to her.

Wrapping an arm around her torso, he slides his fingers out of her, much to her annoyed gruff, and flips them over in a not so smooth twist. It makes her laugh as they crumple down into the rug, with him between her thighs, his face burrowed into her hair as he chuckles beside her. "Smooth."

"Hush. It's been a while."

"Out of practice are you, Locksley?" She grins, dark and devilish and a complete challenge to Robin to wipe off the smirk that dances on her lips. He doesn't answer with words, but with two fingers coasting back between her heat, rubbing tight hard circles that make her arch and hitch in her breathing. That's more like it, he decides as he bites down on her jaw, swallowing the moan that crests out of her with his own ever moving mouth. "I've missed you." she murmurs against his lips, her thighs trembling around his hand as he presses his fingers back into her, mumbling back that he has missed her as well, missed this between them, has dreamt about feeling her again, tasting her on his tongue. A third finger joins, curling up until he hears her gasp in his ear, and he thumps, harder, faster until she is swimming in pleasure, riding the wave of ecstasy only he can give to her.

She's loud, probably louder than she should be, but her body is on fire for him, acute and sharp spirals cracking from the tips of her toes to the ends of her hair, and she soaks in every ounce of it. Grinding down on his fingers, grasping at sweaty shoulder blades, her tongue licking a line through soft stubble on his jaw as he groans into her temple. She'd forgotten how much she truly enjoyed this with him. Being otherwise occupied these past few months has let fizzle the memory of how skilled he is with his fingers. Never again will she go this long without feeling him this way. On a particularly hard grind of his palm against her clit, her body crests, falls over the peak with a shriek and clench around him, and he doesn't stop, simply brushes his nose along her jawline and starts talking in _that_ way, saying _those_ things that have her tumbling farther over the edge.

"God you're gorgeous."

She smiles, licks her lips and tilts her mouth upward to capture his own, his fingers slipping from her and landing wetly on her stomach. She stills when they trace along the thin, faint lines that scar her stomach. For as much as he promises he adores them, she absolutely hates the stretch marks, well perhaps not _hates_ them, but would rather they weren't there and certainly doesn't want to dwell on them right now, when there are much harder, more pleasurable things pressing into her hip right now. Wrapping an ankle around his calf, curling a hand around his anchoring arm, she pushes her palm against his shoulder, rolling them over till she is saddled on top of him once more.

The husky groan that accompanies the squeeze on her hips has satisfaction licking through her body. She likes that she can do this to him. Make his eyes all dark and hungry for her, have that flush on his chest spread up to his neck, certainly makes her feel sexy, and loved. Pitching forward, her fingers grip through his hair, and her mouth devours his. Robin anchors around her with his hands, grabbing a handful of her backside, begging her silently to grind against his straining arousal. But she is done with teasing, sucks back on his lip, reaches between them to stroke him a few times before sinking down onto him.

His eyes flutter closed at the feeling of her warmth surrounding him, the air collapsing from his lungs as she rolls shallowly up and down, a smug grin creeping into his lips at the pinched gasp she lets drop when he pushes back up into her on a downward thrust. Yes, she has definitely missed his thickness stretching her, the way he fits so god damn perfectly, grinds and strokes every curve and sensitive spot inside. She begins to rock with a streak of aggression, wanting to take everything he gives her. It has her gasping, moaning and letting go some sinfully sexual sounds that have him groaning in response, palming her heavy breasts, toying and pinching her nipples.

A calloused hand creeps up from her hip, and presses into her shoulder blades, forcing her elbows to give way so that he may lave attention to her breasts once more. Once attached to a nipple, he shuffles so his feet are firmly planted on the rug and drives his hips up, hard and fast raps that have her moaning out his name. She's so bloody hot, wet and tight around him, impossibly perfect, his mind swirls with everything that is her. And just when he thinks nothing could rival this, she sits up fully on his cock, tangling her fingers into her hair and rising up onto her knees before arching back down. She's a goddess. _His_ goddess. A picture of unparalleled arousal as her hips roll and roll and roll, her breasts bouncing with each push and thrust.

It's more than he can handle, his eyes flickering between her scrunched up face, belly tightening, breasts bouncing, hard nipples, and he dare not look down where they are joined, it will tip him over the edge if he does. Her voice cracks out between a shaky inhale and a heady groan, his name trembling between her swollen lips as he feels her clench around his length, squeezing rhythmically as they chase her peak together. He bites his tongue, hard enough he can taste the metallic seeping of blood as he forces himself to drive into her harder, gripping her hips and driving till she pitches, shrieks out his name with a beyond erotic arch in her back. She falls, and he is quick behind, a few final pumps into her before he pops like a champagne bottle.

They lay there, Regina jelly-limbed on top of him, swapping lazy, tongue filled kisses, as their heart rates dwindle back down to something remotely normal in the post climax after glow. "I love you, you know that right?" She whispers into the crook of his neck, nosing along his collarbone.

"I do. And I love you." His lips find her sweaty forehead, "Always, Regina."

"Me too. Always."

.

..

…

..

.

 **Two Months Later**

Rose touches everything. Absolutely everything within her reach. Be it hair, fingers, buttons, or blocks. If it's close, it's going into her hands, and more than likely into her mouth. It's drool, gummy never ending drool as toy after toy goes straight into her pink lips. The orange beak of the yellow rubber duck is an apparent favorite too.

"Robin. Give her a pacifier instead please."

She doesn't like the pacifier as much, shows her indignance with a shriek when her yellow duck is replaced with the purple soother. He loves the way her brow scrunches, nose upturned (much like her mother's), and the scowl painted on her face at the removal of her toy in favor of something less riddled with unsanitary germs.

How six months have gone by this quickly he will never know. But here they are, with his proverbial doom's day leering around the corner, he blocks it all out with everything that is her, both of them in fact. There are very few minutes that pass where he isn't beside Regina, touching her in some way, telling her that he loves her, for he can see the change in her eyes now that time is beginning to run out on them. The majority of their days are spent on the floor, clapping and singing happy songs to chase away the darkness that is coming. Rosie is scooting now, half crawling on her chubby limbs, and babbling non stop.

Recognition is in her eyes now, even a different unformed noise for each of them. He swears he is "ba" to her. The word sings from her lips whenever she reaches out with ten fat fingers for his attention. It makes his heart soar to the highest of highs. Everything about her is sweet and soft. Her hair is growing, a fuzzy tuft, still, it's chocolate like Regina's, but her eyes have stayed dazzling blue like the sky. He's not sure he's ever felt this in love, save for Roland, for another person before. It's different. A father's love for his daughter. For the muddiness that surrounds a boy, delicacy hugs a girl. And she is as delicate as her namesake. A soft petal to his touch.

She likes Regina's hair, tugs it in her hands whenever she is cradled into her mother's chest, chews on strands until they are slick with spit or Regina notices and pulls it from her mouth. With daddy, she is a snuggler. Right into the crook of his neck, again much like her mother, and can fall asleep to the lulling thud of his heartbeat within minutes. Everyone in the castle calls her Sunshine. A happy ray of light that captures each of their attention. They adore her, Granny and Rosetta probably most. She goes easily to them. Toying with the chain on Granny's glasses, or the sparkly gems on Rosetta's dress. They adore her, and she them.

But the days with everyone around are near an end, the Charmings along with an eight month old baby Neal have finally decided it's time to go home. Even if Regina isn't ready, or Robin for that matter, it is happening and they can do nothing but wait.

She's tried to give him every explanation she can about Storybrooke. Has drawn out maps and pictures from memory in a sketchbook she's given him. It has everything and it still feels like not enough. He is going into a new world without her, and he is terrified. Scared to his core that he will flounder. Not that he tells her that. She is already beyond panicked for all of them, burdening her with his own worries won't help ease any of the anxiety that riddles her. He just smiles, thanks her and tucks the book away. He needs to be her strength, her rock, needs to be the one that can kiss away the fear and promise that it will all work out, to have hope in something she can't find any in.

He's also bestowed on her a gift, a small simple braided green bracelet that hangs around her wrist. Something she'd blinked back tears over when he tied it onto her. A memory of their time here together. Something he'd taught her back when they were only teenagers who met on a grassy hill by a lake side, a day where Robin knew his heart belonged with her. Rosie likes to tug at it, curious in her inspection of the pendant Robin had carved that dangles from it. A little flower, a rose carefully crafted from white birch. He'd made himself one as well, a matching tiny ornament that hangs on the simple gold chain Regina had given him months ago. They rest on his heart, to be carried with him wherever he goes.

"Regina? Robin?" Rosetta peaks through the doorway and Regina's heart sinks at the look on the red fairies face. They've run out of time. "Everyone wants to speak with you both in the council chambers." Robin nods, knowing what is to come, thanks Rosie's godmother as she leaves them be for a quiet minute and turns his eyes to Regina who already has tears streaking down her cheeks.

"Hey," his fingers tip her chin up, "Don't cry."

She sinks into him, doing the exact opposite of what he asked and simply cries harder into his tunic. He swallows the lump in his throat and kisses the crown of her head, "It's going to be alright. I promise."

"I don't want this to happen."

"I know, love. But think of Henry. You are going to get to see him again."

She sniffs, and grips his hand, wrapping it around her and their daughter. For as thrilling the idea is to get to see her son again, she is losing another family in the process. It just doesn't seem fair.

"Look at me." He dips his chin down, bumping his nose to her own as his forehead rests against hers, "I love you. I always will. No memory curse can ever take that away." Her silence says nothing and everything as she kisses him sadly, the taste of salty tears coating his tongue. He just wants to see her smile one last time before everything changes.

"Ba!"

He smiles as he parts from Regina's lips, looking down into bright blue questioning eyes. "Ba!" Her hands reach and fist up into his face. "Oh my sweet little girl." He scoops her out of Regina's arms, and settles her to his chest, her cheeks immediately nuzzling into his neck. "I love you, Rosie. Always. Don't forget that. I love you so much." A few tears leak from his closed eyes as he inhales her baby soft smell, the feeling of her weight in his arms.

"Daddy? Are we going to the new place now?"

Roland climbs over the bed, eyes welled up as Regina settles him into her lap. "Yes we are." She kisses his forehead through his curls. "I love you, Roland. You know that right?"

"Mhmm. I love you too, Regina."

Her eyes meet Robin's, and he smiles sadly.

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It swirls bright in front of her. Dark pops of color bursting through the gate that glows in the dining hall. A few have already gone through. The dwarves had been first, more than eager to get back. Granny had squeezed Regina's hand and kissed Rosie sweetly on the forehead before she and Ruby had followed into the black swirl. Regina's heart clenches painfully watching the crowd around them dwindle until it is just the Charmings, Rosetta and her own family left to cross.

"It's going to be okay, Regina. I promise. We will find Emma and have this curse removed as fast as possible." David had sighed, holding Snow's hand as she quietly sniffed beside him. Finally they appear to have grasped what Regina is about to lose. It doesn't make it any better though. Nothing can. She won't be whole until she has Robin and Roland back.

Snow hugs her fiercely tight before walking behind David with Neal in his arms and through the portal. Air runs out of her lungs at the feeling of Robin's lips pressed to her temple. This is it. The last time she is going to get to have them. "Have faith, Regina." Rosetta tries to smile as she nuzzles into both Roland and Rosie in their parents hold. "I'll see you both very soon okay?" Roland nods, still rather uncertain of what is going on, but Rosie simply babbles and reaches out for a shiny gem on the fairies dress. Rosetta brings her palm to Rosie's hand, blows a glittery kiss that soaks into the baby's skin. "I love you, sweet girl."

Robin's hand is on her back as they watch Rosetta cross. Sweat pooling in his palms as the silence deafens around them. He hears the tremble in Regina's breath as she turns to find his eyes, her hand cupping his cheek as he leans into the touch and kisses her hand. He wants to say something, but the words catch in his throat as she nods through her tears, standing up on her tiptoes to kiss his lips softly, another to Roland's forehead.

Together they step through the portal and everything goes dark as she feels his hand slip from her own.

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The sheets are soft as she wakes up to a soft sound she can't quite place. It sounds like a baby. Frowning her eyes crack slowly open into the blinding light of morning sunshine and her heart stops. She is in her mansion. Her home in Storybrooke. But that's impossible. They just sent Emma and Henry over the townline to escape Pan's curse. They should be in the Enchanted Forest. Her spell should have worked. Her heart thunders in her chest as she sits up, her eyes widening at the sight of her rather long hair tumbling over her shoulders and onto swollen round breasts.

A babbling noise has her spinning on the spot and everything freezes as a pair of bright blue eyes stare up at her from a cradle of blankets. There is a baby in her bed. A little girl that looks an awful lot like her, except for her eyes. What the hell was going on? Whose child is this? Is she hers? That's impossible. She couldn't have…

"Ba!" A tiny fist stretches up and reaches for something on Regina's wrist. A braided bracelet with a small ornate charm that looks like a rose. She cradles the little girl, who goes far too easily into her arms for Regina to be a stranger. A soft pink glow radiates from the little girl and Regina's heart stops as a fuzzy memory of a swollen belly and swirls of rain and petals flutter in a stomach that feels a lot like her own. A low voice muffles out against her ear, a feeling of stubble brushing her shoulder and large hands wrapping around a pregnant belly.

"Ba!"

Bewildered at the hazy image that disappears at the sound of the baby girl's voice, Regina looks down into her sparkling sky blue eyes. "You're mine aren't you?" She smiles in disbelief at the fact she has a daughter. With who she has no idea, but something is clearly a miss. And she needs answers.

"Ba!"

* * *

TBC.


	21. Chapter 21

**Tethered To You 21. **

****Previously on TTY: With little baby Rose here, the people of the Enchanted Forest decide it's time to go back to Storybrooke but the dark magic bean comes with a price, the loss of memories and Regina wakes up in her Mansion with a little girl she doesn't know and a father she has no idea of****

Her mansion isn't exactly baby proofed. Thankfully, Regina hadn't thrown out any of Henry's old things, and well she has her magic, so she can pretty much get whatever this little girl needs. But apparently feeding from a bottle just isn't working. The baby in her arms fought, fidgeted and cried at the rubber synthetic nub placed against her lips. Whined and batted it away with a cry.

It's making Regina nervous. That she won't eat. It's been a good two hours since she woke up with the adorable little stranger in her home, and she has to be hungry. But every time Regina grabs the bottle, the girl screams, tears flow out harder and she cradles herself into Regina's breast. Which is odd. Because they are sore. In a way Regina's never felt before. Swollen and sensitive. Probably the most bizarre is that she is _leaking_ , for lack of a better term. Which has to be impossible. She can't surely be lactating just from mothering intuition when she's not even sure who this baby belongs to.

That too is strange. The little girl, dare she say it, looks just like her, except the eyes, those are the brightest blue Regina's ever seen. Everything else though resembles Regina. The dark head of soft hair, the slant of her nose, pout in her lips, even the expressions she's gurgled out. It's bizarre, and yet fondly entrancing at the same time. If, and it's a very big if, this little girl is in fact her own, that means there's a father out there, but who is a complete mystery. There isn't anyone here in Storybrooke she would have gotten into bed with, least of all made a child with.

The tiny whine brings her attention back down to the babe nestled into her chest, and she wonders rather embarrassed if perhaps the bottle isn't what she wants. "What's wrong sweet girl? What do you need?" She coos gently, swaying the baby back and forth as she wriggles and whimpers in the purple swaddled blanket Regina had found her in. Chewing on her lower lip, she strokes gently across the tiny head of hair, frowning nervously as she walks down over to the living room couch, sitting easily back against the cushions.

Brown eyes lock onto sparkly blues, wary meeting curiosity. Regina stills for a moment before releasing a few buttons of her blouse, her heart thumping with each button that pops open and the slide of silk down her chest as she removes her bra. A swirl of soft pink trickles from the little girls palms and Regina can feel it immediately, the comforting gratitude that sinks into her skin at the touch of magic. It's gentle like a petal, beyond delicate as she adjusts her arms and the little girl latches onto her nipple.

She lets a shaky breath go at the feeling. Tears flushing her eyes as the baby suckles from her. "You're mine. I know you are." Sighing with a small disbelieving smile, she leans back against the couch, playing with a chubby foot as she lets her body do what it needs, feed her daughter. She'd expect it to be strange, uncomfortable even, nursing a baby she has no memory of birthing. But it's the exact opposite in fact. It feels normal. Right even. Her daughter suckles and suckles, eyes closing as she finally fills her belly, a curled up fist laying against Regina's chest, holding onto a locket of hair.

Regina lets her mind go, wandering into how this could have happened. Well she knows _how_ , but with _who_ , is the more important question. They should be in the Enchanted Forest. Her spell should have worked. They watched Emma and Henry drive across the townline as Pan's curse swallowed the town whole. But this little girl has to be at least five or six months old, what with the chubby rolls of fat along her arms and legs. Which means they had to be in the Enchanted Forest for at least fifteen months, and that's if Regina had gotten pregnant the second they hit the dirt. Which is ridiculous. Perhaps it's been two years, maybe longer even.

The thought makes her heart ache. She's missed so much of Henry's life. A life he doesn't even remember. She wonders if he is happy. If he's grown taller, what he likes, what subjects in school he prefers, if he has friends there. She may never know.

A tiny gurgle pulls her back from the wandering of her thoughts, and she smiles down at her daughter, "All done, sweet girl?" She tugs her bra back on, buttons her shirt quickly, and moves the baby to her shoulder, rubbing and patting her back gently till a soft burp escapes. The baby nuzzles into Regina's shoulder, her little feet kicking happily at her mother's stomach as she rocks them back and forth.

She smells perfect. That baby smell Regina had wanted to bottle up from Henry just so she could have it for the rest of her life. He had this light airy scent to him, like a gentle summer's wind, warm and kind. This little girl, smells like flowers, soft delicate petals. It calms Regina, has her eyes closing as she sways her daughter back and forth, her tiny body growing heavy as sleep claims the full belly. This had always been her favorite part of having a baby. Nap time. The feeling of a weight in her arms, warm and soft, little puffing breaths on her chest and a steady heartbeat against her skin. She loves this.

Running her nails up and down the cotton onesie she closes her eyes, humming out a soft tune she isn't exactly sure she knows where it's coming from. But she knows it. Can hear a low timbered voice lingering the melody in her ears, or rather into her daughters. It's familiar. This voice. From where she can't exactly put her finger on, but it's comforting, like an old memory cracking through to the surface. Perhaps it's the father. A man she clearly felt enough affection for to become intimate with.

A knock at the door interrupts the quiet time and Regina scowls at the sound, peering down at her daughter who still sleeps soundly in her arms. Well that's good, she's a heavy sleeper. Kissing the soft curls she stands, wrapping the baby up in her blanket as she makes her way to the door.

"Regina!"

"Keep your voice down." She hushes a bewildered Snow White standing on her doorstep, her eyes pointedly flicking down to the fast asleep baby she carries. That has Snow's eyes widening, her jaw dropping as she takes in the sight. "Whose baby is that?" She questions with a hint of concern, one that almost seems like mild accusation.

Regina rolls her eyes, hugs the little girl tighter, a flash of her son being taken away from her by the Charmings and Emma swirling in her heart. "She's mine." Her answer is quick and sharp, tone enough to have Snow's eyes softening as a flush of embarrassment creeps into her cheeks. "I'm sorry. It's just…."

"What? Unbelieveable I could have a baby?"

"No." She shakes her head, "Regina that's not what I meant. It's just surprising that's all."

"Seems there is a lot of that right now." She spies David walking up her pathway with a baby of his own babbling away in his arms. Snow turns, smiles at the sight and then back at Regina. "Yeah, that was interesting to wake up with. I'm sure you know." She nods back down to the little girl. Regina shrugs, and walks back into her house, knowing fully well that the Charmings will come in with out without an invitation.

The sound of voices stirs her daughter who whimpers softly, rubbing her face against Regina's neck as she awakes drowsily. It makes Regina's heart flutter at the indignant look the girl gives to the people who have so rudely interrupted her nap time. Like mother like daughter clearly. She sits back on the sofa, turning so that her daughter can sit in her lap, back against her chest, a fist of Regina's fingers going straight into her mouth. Leaning down, Regina kisses her temple, letting her finger be sucked on, slobbery and messy as it may be, but it appears to be soothing to the little girl, so sticky fingers be damned, it just means she will have to get a pacifier soon.

"Who's this?" David sits with his own boy in his arms, shock written across his features as he stares down at the little girl across from him.

"She's my daughter."

"Well I can see that. She looks just like you." He replies with a smile. "Except the eyes." His gaze flicks curiously up to Regina's. "Any idea who the father is?"

"If I did, do you not think he'd be here as well?"

David flushes, licks his lips and avoids Regina's stare. Thankfully, Snow is there to bail him out of what could have been a very awkward conversation. "She's beautiful, Regina."

"I think so." She smiles down at her daughter who wriggles happily her arms, moving onto Regina's thumb with a mouthy grip.

"What's her name?"

The question stills Regina. She honestly hadn't even thought about that. Her name. What is her name? Surely she must have one. She wouldn't have just let that slip. But what would it be?

"You don't know do you?"

She shrugs with a shake of her head, "I woke up and she was here this morning. I didn't think about it to be honest." The confession is quiet as guilt rakes up her spine. What kind of mother doesn't even know their own child's name? She watches as the little girl eyes up the woven bracelet on her wrist, the dangling rose being batted around by chubby fingers. It makes her smile when her daughter finally clutches it in her hands. The second her hand grips the trinket, a puff of pink magic blooms out, up into Regina's face and seeps into her brain. It's a flower. A swirling single color of red and soft petals, that same voice she heard humming in her ears not to long ago, mumbling out into the fog a happy "Hello, my little Rosie." She can hear her daughter babble gleefully as the vision melts away.

"Are you a little Rose?"

Blue eyes meet bright brown.

"What was that?" David huffs out confused as Regina stares down at the sky blue hue that holds her gaze, carved flower trinket now stuffed into her gummy mouth.

"She was showing me her name."

"She has magic?"

Regina rolls her eyes, "She's my daughter, of course she does."

"I'm sorry. I just didn't realize babies this small could actually use it."

"Honestly, neither did I. But she is special. Aren't you, Rose?" She tickles the foot that bounces about. Rose. Rose Mills. It's rather pretty. Why she chose it she doesn't know, perhaps it has some connection to her father. Maybe it's a family namesake? The idea has her heart tumbling over. There is a family out there. Somewhere. Maybe back in the Enchanted Forest, or perhaps here in Storybrooke, just outside her door.

"Well. Little Rose, we'd like to introduce you to your… uh… cousin Neal." Snow pipes up, taking her son from David's arms. It makes Regina laugh at the ridiculous state of their family tree. Technically she would be this little boys step-grandmother, Rose being an aunt. But it's strange, and she certainly doesn't feel like a grandma.

"It's nice to meet you, Neal." She smiles at the chubby baby boy. He's cute. Looks exactly like David. Her inner monologue sarcastically biting out at the fact it's another _Prince Charming_. But he is adorable. Parental lineage be damned. "We guess he's about seven or eight months. Not that we can remember how it happened."

"Oh I am sure you both know what goes into making a baby." Regina grins with a pointed look at the pair that squirm and flush under her gaze. David's muffled, _Yes well… anyway,_ delectably childish as Regina turns her eyes back to her daughter, her little Rose. She is perfect. No one will be able to tell Regina otherwise. Her fat pink lips finally let go of the trinket, and her hands clench and flex into the air playing with nothing. And that seems to make her rather unhappy as she frowns and cries out indignantly. With a chuckle and a press to her soft curls, Regina's hand swirls in a light lavender, a stuffed white bear blooming into her palm. Rose squeals and nabs it straight away, bunching the toy into her face, the pink fuzzy nose straight into her mouth.

"She's a doll, Regina. Truly." Snow smiles, bounces her own baby in her lap. "So... any idea why we are back here without our memories?"

"Honestly," Regina sighs, "I don't have a clue."

"Well someone has to know something. Perhaps we should call a town meeting?"

That just means she has to leave this little precious bubble of her daughter and go face the people who are clearly going to assume it was her who cast this curse. How she is going to get them to believe her is uncertain enough to have Regina's palms sweat. They never do trust her, regardless of the many times she has saved them all since the Dark Curse. She's the villain in this story.

"Regina?"

She swallows the anxious bubble in her throat and nods in agreement. "We can do it this afternoon. I am sure people have a lot of questions."

"And maybe some answers." Snow spells out, in that nauseating hopeful sing song voice as she looks down at Rose once more and then back up to Regina. Maybe she is right. Perhaps whoever is Rose's father will also be here. The thought has Regina's heart tripping over it's beats as she stands swiftly, baby girl in tow and bids the Charmings goodbye. She just wants a few more hours before everything becomes chaotic.

The door closes and Regina lets out a heavy breath, cuddling her daughter in tight as they sway back and forth in the living room. The tumultuous pace of her heart clearly felt by Rose, who snuggles in closer, patting her little hands against Regina's chest as soft pink tendrils of smoky magic escape and lace around Regina's heart, a sweet attempt at soothing the nerves building within.

"Oh, my sweet girl." She kisses the crown of black hair, "Thank you." This feeling is incredible. Having a daughter, one who has magic this early on, something she definitely needs to find out why she is apparently able to use her magic so early on. Children don't usually tap into their powers until much, much later. Rose is clearly just special. "How about a bath before we face the town?"

"Ba!"

"Yes, baby. Ba." She chuckles, climbing the steps with her precious cargo, "Whatever that means."

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Well. This is clearly not the Enchanted Forest. That much is certain as Robin takes in the different clumping of trees around he and his Merry Men. They last thing he remembers is walking through the forest he called home, a shriek from a beast in the sky, and then nothing. It's all dark after that. Something is definitely wrong. Even the men can sense it as they pitch tents and start a fire in the clearing.

He'd woken up a few hours ago, a pounding headache and the lingering feeling of slender fingers sliding away from his own. Fortunately Roland is safe, confused just as much as everyone else, but he is here, sitting quietly with Tuck and Alan with a look on his face Robin can't place. It must be terrifying for him. To wake up in an unknown world. The strange thing is (besides waking up wherever they are), is the ache in his heart that thumps with every step he takes. It's like he's lost someone, or something dear to him.

This kind of pain he's only ever truly felt maybe three times in his life before, and it always came from the loss of someone he loved. First it had been his sister, taken at a young age for the fear of the townsfolk about her magic. The second had been losing Marian to that god forsaken illness. And the third, well, he hasn't let the pain of losing _her_ go since the day she'd banished him to a life of a thief.

Walking over to the fire, the face of the woman he hasn't let surface in many years lingers. He knows what she did, the curse she cast that took so many away from the Enchanted Forest, leaving the rest frozen in time behind her. Perhaps this new curse was her doing as well. It's entirely possible. But why bring them this time? The thought stews and rots in his gut as he takes his place beside Roland who fiddles with the hem of his coat.

"Did you have breakfast, my boy?"

His son nods, a sullen thing that has Robin's heart tightening. He's clearly troubled by something, and no boy this little should have to deal with such confusion. Quietly, Roland moves his way into Robin's lap, nuzzling into his arms like he used to do as a much smaller child. He hasn't done it in years, cuddled this tightly into his father who wraps his arms around him protectively. "What's wrong, son?"

He hears a whimpered sniffle against his tunic, little hands gripping harder at Robin's coat as he shakes his head, not answering a word in return. He must be scared. "Oh, Roland, it's alright lad. Don't be afraid."

"I'm not."

"Then what has you looking like a sad puppy?"

Sitting back so he can tip up Roland's cheeks, Robin smiles as best he can, hoping it can soothe the ache in his son's eyes that stare wetly up at him. "Where's Regina?" He whispers quietly.

The name freezes Robin to the very core. His son doesn't know of Regina. He has never spoken of her to anyone, not even his Merry Men. How could Roland possibly know of her? Swallowing thickly against the image of the face he's kept hidden for years, he leans down, carding his fingers through Roland's curls. "Who is Regina?" He tries to sound as calm as possible, though the tremble in his voice shakes heavily.

Roland frowns, "You don't remember her?"

Of course he does. He remembers every last detail about her. Every smile that had his heart soaring into the clouds. Each changing color of her stunning eyes, from the darkest of chocolate when the days were taking their toll, to the lightest of whiskey gold when she laughed. His heart thumps and flips as he tries to remain calm.

"No son. I don't know who she is." He lies.

The sadness floods Roland's face, a pouting lip quivering as the tears bubble into his eyes. "But she was in the Enchanted Forest. We lived in her castle."

Perhaps this is a delusional dream Robin is in. It's not possible that she was in the Enchanted Forest with them. It's not possible that they crossed paths again without him remembering anything about it. And he honestly doesn't know if he would allow his son to be anywhere near her. Chewing on his bottom lip, Robin catches Tuck's eye, who sits just as stunned beside them. Flicking his gaze between his son and the Friar, Robin silently tries to ask his mentor, what in the bloody hell is going on? Sadly, Tuck just shakes his head with a shrug. It appears no one understands what is happening.

"Papa?"

"Yes, my boy."

"Can you tell me a story?"

"Of course, which would you like to hear?"

Rolands hands pat against his chest as he thinks, long and hard before muffling out, "One with Regina. I miss her." Robin stills, frowns out at nothing as his mind conjures up a complete blank. What is he supposed to say? He can see her face, hear her voice in his ears, even feel the gentle touch of her hands against his own. But that was years ago. And yet, his heart flickers and flips at the thought of her. Of this crazed notion that his son knows her.

There is still anger there though. When he thinks of her and what she had done. Resentment and bitterness to the life she forced him into living. Alone. On the run. Without her. Why he has no idea, he just wanted her to be happy. Apparently that was not a two way street. It couldn't have been with what she sentenced him to. Scowling, he says nothing to Roland who waits patiently in his arms, fights the burning in his heart at the mere mention of her name.

"Papa? Who's that?"

He turns, following the pointed finger of his son, and there is a woman standing there. Draped in a red glowing gown, brown ringlets and a bewildered look on her face as she steps into the camp.

"Rosetta?"

"Robin!" She beams, skipping over to him and his son. "Oh I am so glad I found you. Have you any idea where we are?"

"Not a clue."

"Well that's a pity."

She sits down beside him, surveying the pitched tents and toasty fire, "Hello, young sir. What's your name?"

He eyes up the stranger for a moment before his lips break into a wide smile. "Rosetta! It's me!" His body leaps from Robin's into her stunned frame. She chuckles a bit, shocked, but holds the child tight anyway, staring at Robin for an explanation, though he is just as dumbfounded as she. Roland never met this fairy. She had only shown up that one night, when her words had been kind and heartfelt, a vial of red pixie dust pressed into his hands and the notion of hope that there was love still out there for him.

"Roland knows you?"

She shakes her head, hugging Roland regardless, "I guess? What's going on?"

Robin sighs, watches the way his son naturally relaxes into this woman's arms, one who should be an absolute stranger to him. His boy has always been rather shy with newcomers, quiet and curious in the shadows. But this, well, this is clearly not the timid child he knows.

"I think our memories have been erased."

"Erased? By magic?"

"I don't know. I assume as much."

"That explains why I have no idea where we are or how we got here." Her hand waves out around them, glittering sparkles of red and gold following in its path. Robin can tell by the expression that etches into the woman's face that there is uncertainty and nervousness licking through her. Waking up in a strange place with no recollection is rather unsettling.

"Rosetta?"

"Yes, Roland?"

"Papa doesn't remember Regina."

The fairies eyes lock onto Robin's, or at least attempt to as he avoids her curious gaze. A story untold clearly. Her knees bounce Roland as she turns back and smiles, "And who is Regina?" Robin waits, leans in a fraction more, desperate to hear what his son has to say.

"She's the Queen."

"Oh? The Queen of where?"

"The Enchanted Forest! You know her too!"

Rosetta hums out, interested at the utter certainty of the boy in her arms. Magic is always different with children. It doesn't always administer the same effects on young souls as it does grown ones.

"Tell me about her, Roland. This Queen Regina."

The question seems to ignite Roland, who squirms happily in her lap, a smile reaching high into his dimples. "She is really pretty. And we lived in her castle. But she was sad for a long time so Papa and I went to go see her lots."

"She sounds lovely."

He nods, babbling on as Robin sits frozen at his son's story of how she'd saved him twice from flying monkeys with a bubble of magic. How they had had picnics by a lake and rode horses and played in her room.

"Roland? Can you describe her room?" Robin fumbles out, kneeling beside his son and the fairy with disbelief.

"Uh huh. It was big. And had a big bed and a balcony that looked at the mountains."

Well that could be anywhere, though the memories of Robin's time spent on a similar balcony with Regina overlooking the rocky landscape has his breath hitching through twisted lungs. Perhaps it's just Roland's imagination gone wild… "And she used to make grass bracelets with us, like the ones you make, Papa."

Robin's brain fizzles out, spikes and snaps frantically about. He's not touched a blade of grass in that way for decades, swore to never twine together the strands for it only reminded him of her. Sweat pools on his back, lines along his temple as he slumps into the dirt and stares astonished into the burning flames. Is it even possible? Was she truly there? Had they honestly spent time together?

"Rosetta? Why doesn't anyone remember her?"

"I am not sure, but I bet we'll find out soon enough."

"Do you think she is here?"

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She knew it. They are all here, sitting clamoured into steel chairs, staring at her with accusatory eyes. Not a single drop of trust in any one of them. Well save for the Charmings, and Granny apparently, who sits rather gruffly on the side of the hall, arms tucked securely around Rose. Oddly, when Regina had walked through the door, Rose had been quietly nestled against her chest, happy to play with Regina's necklace while the townspeople gawked openly at her in shock. Upon seeing the older woman, however, Rose had flailed and wriggled incessantly in Regina's hands, babbling out happily in Granny's direction who merely cocked a curious eyebrow at the baby.

If there was anyone in this bloody town Regina could honestly trust, it was the diner head. The one woman who had been there since the beginning of Regina's days as Queen. Their history… is complicated, but even here in Storybrooke, amongst all the pandemonium and allegations thrown at Regina, Granny was always quietly by her side. So when her daughter had squealed and reached out for the woman, Regina's eyes had flushed with tears when Granny simply smiled and cuddled the little girl into her arms without question, just a gentle easy chuckle, "I'm not sure who you are little one, but you are beautiful, just like your mommy."

Quickly they had spoken before the town hall began to line with more and more confused townsfolk. A squeeze from Granny's hand on Regina's forearm unable to soothe the nerves that fluxed through the mayor. "I'll keep watch over her. You go do what you need to." Regina smiled, kissing Rose's cheek and untangling her daughter's hand from Granny's beaded glasses chain, which didn't last long once she'd walked away and saw a blue bead being suckled on merrily by her daughter without a second look from Granny.

"How do we know it's not you!?" Someone hollers, and she is pretty sure it's that insipid angry dwarf.

"Yeah! You expect us to believe this isn't your doing?" Another chimes in, garnering the crowd into a few cheers and hollers as Regina takes her place at the front of the crowd. Might as well let them get it all out now, so they can actually have a proper discussion afterwards.

"Curses are your thing!"

She rolls her eyes at that one, angling a sharp eyebrow at the man who freezes at her glare and shifts behind a few other patrons. Funny how they are so brave in a crowd but not one on one. Cowards.

Drumming her nails on the tabletop she waits, lets the murmurs finally die down when David stands with a hand in the air, asking for silence. Funny how they will listen to him, but not to their actual Queen. Mayor. Whatever. She is still their superior right now.

"Okay. Okay. That's enough. We called this meeting to find out answers, not throw accusations." David calls out, earning a dopey smile from his wife who holds their baby proudly. "Now. We've spoken with Regina." He gestures her way and the crowd grumbles, "She did not cast this curse."

"Yeah right!" Grumpy once again decides to throw his allegations out. If she could only _dispose_ of him… things would be so much happier. She can dream.

"We know that Pan's curse was supposed to take us back to the Enchanted Forest. And clearly we spent some significant time there." David smiles at his son, much the same as Regina's eyes flicker over to Rose who is dead asleep against Granny's chest. "Snow and I would like to take this moment to formally introduce you to our son. Prince Neal."

The crowd cheers, and Regina cringes as she sees her daughter's arms stretch as a tiny whimper escapes her at the noise. Perhaps she should go to her. Twitching in her chair, she watches as everyone turns to the little sound in Granny's embrace, a gasp and shock echoing through the air.

"Who's kid is that?" Whale gruffs out, eyeing the baby girl. And bless the Gods for Granny and the protective snarl she sends back.

"Mine." Regina stands, quickly pacing towards her daughter who is crying sadly at the drilling of a hundred eyes.

"Someone had a baby with you?" Grumpy hollers out, "Poor schmuck."

The fireball burns into her hand as Regina faces the dwarf. His miserable life ends now. Seven dwarves is far too many anyway. Six will do just fine.

"Leroy!" Snow scolds the grump with a frown. "If we are going to figure out who cursed us we need to stick together. Not tear one another apart. Apologize to Regina."

The dwarf flushes red hot with embarrassment, opting to not do as the princess asked, but simply cross his arms and sit down with a huff into his chair.

Sliding Rose from Granny's arms, Regina sways her daughter back and forth gently, letting the trinket on her bracelet get gummed on. She doesn't care if these people don't like her. They can send every nasty retort her way. But Rose is a different story. She is pure. And Regina is a fierce mother, they should know that already.

"So if Regina didn't cast this curse then who did?" Ruby questions out from beside Granny. When she saddled up beside Regina and her grandmother, Regina is unsure, but it gives her this strange sense of security. If Granny follows Regina, Ruby will too. It's pack mentality. And Regina is grateful more than ever for the older woman's faith in her.

"I don't know. But we are going to find out and get our memories back." Snow smooths out, steadying the unwary crowd. "Now, if anyone has any information please come talk to us. The rest of you, just be careful and watch out for new residents in the town."

"You mean like the guys that are camped out in the forest right now?" Grumpy heaves indignantly, rolling his exasperated eyes. "What? You're telling me no one else has seen them? That's comforting."

 _Men in the forest? Who the hell are they?_

Regina scowls, she doesn't like strangers, they only bring trouble. But her heart flickers for some odd reason. Flutters when Rose nuzzles into her neck, finally exhausted from her tears prior. On more than one occasion, newcomers into the town means nothing good for Regina. More often than not, they are here for her, to seek some sort of revenge. And while her own well being hasn't always caused her that much thought, her children on the other hand are a different story. She will die protecting them. She doesn't care how many forest dwelling men there are. If they are here to harm her child, well they can simply burn along with the trees.

The hall door swings open as if it's ears were burning, revealing a gang of grown men dressed with bows and arrows on their back, wary glints in their eyes as they enter the hall. There is at least eight of them. All holding some sort of weapon at their hips as they slowly tread inside.

Regina's heart burns and her palm flexes with a pulse of magic in her fingertips. If they want to fight here, well then so be it.

"Regina!"

A squealing voice echoes through the silent parting crowd as a young boy wriggles his way through them, brown curly hair and big chocolate button eyes that shine up at Regina who stands frozen to the spot. He looks familiar. But she is certain she's never seen the boy before. Her heart flips over at his face. She knows him. Rose babbles in her arms at the young boy.

"Rosie! You're here!"

 _What the hell?_

"Roland! Son, you were supposed to stay at camp!" A timbered, exasperated voice booms out as a man comes crashing through the doors, and the breath runs from Regina's lungs, the world tilting on it's axis as he runs to his son, hoisting him up with a stern frown. He's here. It's him. But how? How is this possible?

"Papa! Papa, look! It's Regina and Rosie! We found them!"

Robin turns, and his jaw drops as his gaze locks onto a pair of whiskey brown eyes, both wide in shock.

"Regina?"

She shakes at the sound of his voice, the bright blue of his eyes that drill straight into her as he stands straighter, bewildered at the sight of her.

"Ba!"

 **TBC.**


	22. Chapter 22

**Tethered To You 22**

 _Previously of TTY: Regina wakes up with Rosie and spends some quality mother daughter time. Snow and Charming pay her a visit to discuss the memory curse they all seem to be under and a town meeting is called. The townspeople are less than impressed and throw accusations at Regina being the source. Admits the chaos a little boy comes storming in calling out Regina's name, and his father soon follows…_

They stare at one another. Regina's heart thumps hard, so hard in her ears it drowns out the whispers and curiosity of the crowd. All she can see is him and his blue stunned eyes that bore into her. The young boy he holds in his arms frowns between the two of them, obviously irritated at their reaction. But how else is she supposed to react? It's Robin. He is here. With a son who apparently knows her and her daughter. Which is impossible given she's never met this child before. At least she doesn't think she has. Surely she'd remember those bright brown eyes and dimpled cheeks. He's beyond adorable. Even as he pouts indignantly.

"Uh? What's going on?" David steps beside Regina, eyeing up the stranger in their midst. She doesn't tear her eyes from Robin who stands frozen to his spot, but she feels Snow saddle up against her other shoulder, curiously watching the pair who've yet to utter a single word. Clearly there is a history here.

"Regina? Are you alright?"

Is she? How is this even possible? Him being here. Standing in front of her. She hasn't seen him since the night she tried to save his wife from that illness that swept through the kingdom. Not that she didn't want to persay, but it's a little difficult to just waltz into wherever he was living and say what? Hi? It was easier if she tried to forget about him. Not that her plan had worked out very well.

Swallowing her nerves and begging her thundering heart to slow, her voice shakes more than she'd like with the trepidatious, "I'm fine." Rosie babbles in her arms, clawing at her shirt with fat fingers and tiny legs wriggling about. Regina shuffles her, trying to settle her daughter down, but Rosie simply screams, wrangles herself into a twisted reach towards Robin, shrieking out, "Ba!" shrilly.

His eyebrows raise, not near as high as Regina's, but the shock is written across his face. This little girl is gorgeous, looks just like Regina, except for her sky blue eyes, those definitely are not her mother's. A small clench has his heart aching as his mind wanders to the thought of who had the chance to father her. Who could have been so lucky? He shakes himself from the wondering. He shouldn't feel this pang of jealousy towards a man he's never met. Certainly needs to have a word with himself over the small voice that peeks into his brain over the fact Regina has a significant other. Not that he wants it to be himself. No. That's not what he wants.

His heart flips over when the baby girl reaches out for him again, crying out in a babble of words he doesn't understand and he wants to take her from Regina's arms. Wants to cradle the tiny babe into his chest and soothe away the building puddle of tears in her eyes. It's just his father's intuition. That's all. He'd do it for any young one that needed some affection. But there is something about this girl, with a head of dark, chocolate brown hair, pink pouty lips and watering blue eyes that has his feet shuffling closer without thinking.

Regina stills, takes a step back as Robin moves forward, eyes trained on her daughter. He freezes the moment she does, frowns deeply and shakes his head. What did he expect? He doesn't even know what to say to Regina, let alone think she'd let him touch her child. Stepping back he switches Roland from his arms to Little John's. "Take him back to camp please."

"Papa, no!" Roland kicks out in John's hands, struggling to get free. "Put me down! I wanna see Regina!"

There it is again. Her name. Being cried out by this stranger of a child. Her heart clenches and she wants to go to him, to ease his anguish that is written so clearly on his face. But Rosie is crying out in her arms, sobbing so hard her little lungs barely take in any breath as she too squirms and reaches out to Robin again. She struggles to keep Rose upright, much the same as this Little John fights to maintain his hold on the young boy who cries. Robin turns back to his son, trying to hush him as the eyes of the crowd follow him with clear interest.

"Come on, son, we are going." He lifts Roland from John, but the boy kicks out violently between tears, and Robin can do nothing but set him on the ground, attempting to at least hold his hand. But Roland tears it from his grip and runs full force into Regina's leg. It's a good thing she had Henry as she was used to being clamoured on at a moments notice for her posture barely sways at the collision of the small body into her thighs.

"Regina, why don't you remember me?" He sobs into her skirt, and the pain in his words has her kneeling down slowly to his sightline. Her eyes scan his face, desperate to figure out where she knows his eyes from.

He _is_ familiar. She knows it.

Cupping his face gently, she smoothes away the waterfall of tears painting his cheeks. He sniffs, burrows his way into her chest beside Rosie who apparently has decided to calm down now that this little boy is within touching distance. It's strange. Their reaction to each other. Neither seem nervous or afraid of the other. Not even when Roland turns his head and nuzzles his nose to hers, it just makes Rosie giggle and reach out to pat his face.

Regina is stunned, holding her daughter who is out right affectionate to this young boy whose tears have finally begun to abate and a small smile creeps into his chubby cheeks. "Hi, Rosie."

She freezes. "How do you know her name?"

His brown eyes flick up to her own, frowning dejectedly up at her, "She's my sister."

The air whooshes from her lungs, her knees suddenly unsteady in her crouched position. What he said is impossible. It has to be. The sweat pools along her spine as she stares wide-eyed at the boy whose finger is gripped tight in Rosie's palm. How can they be so comfortable with each other? She doesn't know this boy. But he clearly seems to know her and Rosie. Perhaps this is all just a dream and she is going to wake up any second in the Enchanted Forest. There has to be some sort of explanation. Her brain ricochets painfully, darting spikes into the backs of her eyes, so blindingly painful she can't help but squeeze them shut in a desperate attempt to push the stinging of hot tears away.

Her daughter seems to sense the shift in Regina, the overloading panging of agonizing nerves, and a light puff of pink blooms out from the small hand on Regina's chest. It soothes instantly, calms the firing of her heart into something a bit more steady. It makes it easier to breathe, kind of. Her lungs still shake with every inhale, clenching tightly, holding onto the oxygen before it tumbles out.

The magic from her daughter swirls up into her buzzing brain, a foggy picture mixing in. It's this boy. On a large carved out wooden bed Regina knows far too well, bouncing about on the thick mattress, pillows fluffing out, blankets all a mess as he giggles out at the sparkling bubbles in the air, jumping high to pop one that flutters out in a light green shower of dust. All she feels is this sense of happiness, an overwhelming stirring in her gut she reaches for through the recesses of her mind. A knock at the door has the vision swimming out of her brain, a timbered voice chuckling as it fades away even as she desperately claws to hold onto it.

Blinking back the picture, her eyes gape at her daughter who looks up at her curiously, and her blue eyes dance behind the thick line of dark lashes as a soft, "Ba," bubbles out once more. She runs a finger along the slope of Rosie's nose, flicks her eyes to the little boy still tucked into her other arm watching her curiously, and then swallows hard, steels her nerves and moves her eyes slowly across the tiled floor. Counting each square until a pair of dark brown boots invades her vision. She trails slowly up his legs, heart hammering with every inch, until she sees his face staring down at the three of them half sat on the floor of the town hall, and she can't quite place the strange expression that lingers in his eyes.

He looks, confused? No more than she is. But there is also this, dare she think it, longing in the blue irises and for a moment she truly looks at them. His eyes. Drinks in every shade of blue, each tiny speckle of green and the darkest, nearly midnight blue that lines the perfect circle of color. She's seen his eyes, well of course she has, but her heart tugs to a different pair that are in her arms.

She needs to leave. Needs to get out of here. Run as far away from him as she possibly can. Standing on shaky knees, she hears the small whimper echoing from both her daughter and the little boy who clings tighter to her skirt. "I have to go." She stumbles out to no one, but half turns to Granny, fear blazing through her eyes as she looks at the older woman who moves instantly to her side. Her hand grips around Regina's forearm, swaddles around to cup Rosie who has started to squirm once more.

"Regina, no stay!" Roland tugs hard against her sweaty hand, and she stumbles back away from the boy, his eyes welling into tears instantly. Her chest constricts tightly. Hands shaking as she hugs Rosie to her chest. She just wants to go.

"Roland, son. Come here." Robin moves, runs to his son's side in an instant, hauling him up into his arms as he begins to wail and claw out for Regina who just stands there, staring like she's been burnt by a hot clad iron.

"Papa! Put me down!" His little fists slam into Robin's chest, "I want Regina! Papa! No!"

Their eyes lock once more, terrified brown onto distressed blue. He wants to go to her. Why, he has no idea. But he wants to. Wants to take the few steps between them and cradle her into his arms. His heart beating a brutal pace as his right foot takes the first involuntary step towards her, the little girl in her arms screaming out fiercely. He just wants to hold both of them. His left foot moves, and Regina panics, eyes blown wide and a purple swirl of magic engulfs her when her name drops from his lips quietly, and she is gone. Again.

.

..

…

..

.

Rose hasn't stopped crying. Refuses to do anything but sob and flail her tiny fists unhappily even as Regina sways her back and forth. A move that used to soothe her. But it only makes her wail harder. Regina's eyes are flushed with tears as she cradles her daughter, hushing and shushing her gently with every rock. Her head pounds like a hammer against her skull. Pain creeping into her eyes with every whack. If she can just get Rose to calm down, then she can take a hot shower and hopefully nap for an hour and beg this headache to go away.

It's not going to though. She knows that. This banging in her brain isn't going to just piss off after a long much needed nap. It's deeper than that. It's a pair of blue eyes that are making her a complete mess. Two pairs if she is being honest, and a beautiful set of button brown. They are everywhere she looks. In the mirror in her bathroom as she tried a bath to calm Rose down, which didn't work, sadly. Not even the yellow rubber duck she usually fantasizes over could quell the snotty nose and incessant tears. Their two faces follow her. In the reflection of the fridge as she warmed a cup of tea. In the flames of the fire as she attempted to breastfeed her daughter, hoping perhaps it was simply hunger that kept her crying.

But she is crying for something else. For someone else. Why Regina has no idea. Though the little boy, Roland, seemed insistent they knew each other. It's a mix between wailing and "Ba's" that echo throughout the mansion. Until it's all Regina can hear. That one single word. _Ba. Ba. Ba. Ba._

"Rose, I don't know what you want my sweet girl." She presses a kiss to her creased forehead, "Tell me and I will give it to you." Rose cries harder and it has Regina's heart lodging into her throat. She can't soothe her own daughter. Doesn't know what will make these tears stop. She sways and rocks till her back aches, settles down on the sofa, eyes burning with exhaustion.

A knock at the door has Rose screaming, so hard it makes Regina worry she will crack a little lung with the amount of force behind it. She doesn't want to see anyone, not right now. But her feet move anyway. Well perhaps the only person she doesn't mind invading into her mansion is the one standing on the threshold.

"I could hear the little babe crying from my diner." Granny gruffs with a smile, and Regina sighs, lets a tear of her own fall and moves back so the older woman can come inside.

"I can't get her to settle." She shifts Rose from one hip to the other, her arms aching though she dare not put her daughter down.

"May I?" Granny sits in the armchair, extends her arms out to the crying baby and Regina gratefully relinquishes Rose to her and slumps heavily onto the sofa beside them. Closing her eyes, she listens to the soft lullaby whispered out to her daughter, or perhaps it's to soothe Regina. Either way, it's working. Her heart finally calming as the small tears from her daughter begin to subside.

"You look exhausted, Madam Mayor."

"I am." Regina breathes, cuddling her self under a blanket as she turns on her side to watch her daughters little fists grip and tug on the beaded glass chain of Granny's spectacles. Maybe she should get herself a pair. They seem to be the only thing that will quell the screaming.

Grey, green eyes linger on Regina, "What are you going to do?"

Regina frowns, tips her chin up to find Granny's eyes locked onto hers. "Ask that you are on twenty four hour call when she cries?" She tries to smile, but knows that isn't the question she was being asked. Sinking down, her gaze drops back down to Rose who happily babbles in the purple swaddled blanket, bright blue eyes enraptured by something on Granny's dress. Blue eyes. It's impossible that she is his. But they are so alike in their color it makes Regina's heart stammer and flip.

They are missing at least two years of their life. Memories wiped away thanks to a curse she has no idea who cast. And if they did go back to the Enchanted Forest, is it even plausible that she and Robin crossed paths? Even then. Would he have even given her the time of day after what she did to him? She doesn't believe he would have. So no. Rose can't be his.

A second knock at the door has her brows creasing, but Granny rises quickly, hushes Regina who goes to stand, and sways her cargo gently about as she opens the mansion door. A low muffled voice greets on the other side, and Regina cranes her neck to see who exactly Granny is letting inside, not that she has the energy to make them leave. To her surprise, it's the woodmaker who walks back into the living room, Rose apparently having been transferred into his arms.

"Madam Mayor." He tips his hat and sits down on the chair Granny had vacated. She's kind of stunned. Geppetto and she don't have much of a relationship, but here he is, rocking her daughter with a happy smile.

"I'll make tea." Granny calls out from the kitchen, and Regina does nothing but stare at the older gentleman and her baby girl.

"She's a beauty, Madam Mayor."

"Please, just Regina."

He nods, bumps a finger against Rose's nose, "Beautiful just like your mother aren't you sweet one." Regina does smile at that, hides the blush in her cheeks, and the flutter of her heart at the sentiment. She likes that her daughter resembles her. A mini version. Watching Geppetto rock her daughter just makes her think of how amazing it would have been to have her own father here to snuggle his granddaughter. He would have been the perfect Grandpa. Soft and sweet. Doting hand and foot on the little girl.

"Here we go." Granny walks back in, setting three cups of warm tea down on the table, squeezing Geppetto's shoulder gently, and nuzzles down into Rose who cries out happily. Perhaps there is another pair that can watch over her. Even if Regina hasn't exactly asked, it just feels safe having them both here. And she is grateful for them.

They don't speak of much, mainly Rose, avoiding the elephant in the room that stampeded in during the townhall meeting. But it's all Regina can think about as she watches the leaves swirl in the autumn wind outside. Where is he? Why is he here? What does she do now? It's an endless cycle of questions that mull in her brain. Maybe she should go seek him out. Explain everything that happened, and why she did what she did. It was to protect him. He has to know that. Doesn't he?

She thinks of his son, the one who called her out by name though she doesn't remember his face. Had proclaimed with such certainty that her daughter was his sister. Which only meant she and Robin were together. Perhaps it's a side effect of this curse. Giving false memories. Ones that tug at heart strings and buried longing. It's cruel to even consider it.

"Do you have a rocking chair?" Geppetto quietly whispers out. Regina shakes her head, it's been a busy day and she hasn't even made a nursery yet. Tomorrow. Maybe she'll paint it purple and white. Something soft and fitting of her daughter. But then again, maybe a soft pink with red accents to compliment her name. That could work too. "Perhaps then, it could be a gift?"

"You'd make her one?"

He smiles, a palm resting on the sleeping chest of Rose, "It's been quite some time since I've needed a reason to create something."

Her eyes water at the thought, a light sniffed out "I'd love that," following with a quiet, "Thank you." Geppetto nods once more, passes the sleeping girl back to Granny who cradles the baby tight in her purple blanket, taking the spot the older man stands from. "If you need anything Madam May—" He stops, blushing as he amends quickly, "Regina, please do not hesitate to ask."

"I appreciate that."

She watches him tip his hat to Granny, who blushes uncharacteristically, and heads out the front door, leaving the two women in a comforting silence. At least for a little while, before Granny sits down beside Regina, flicking her grey eyes over to her. "I know it's not my place. But I know your history together." Regina cringes and sucks in a hard breath. "I think you should talk to him."

"And say what?"

"Well, usually _Hello_ , is a normal greeting."

Regina huffs out a laugh, rolls her eyes and reaches to stroke over the soft curls of dark brown hair of her daughter. Nerves skitter about her skin, "Somehow I don't think that would work."

"I beg to differ. I saw the way he was watching you Regina."

"With contempt."

Granny shakes her head, patting Regina's thigh softly, "With longing."

Her heart clenches, burns white hot, bleeding at the thought as she chews her lower lip, mumbling out a quiet, "That's impossible."

"Why's that?"

"He should hate me."

A grey eyebrow arches high into the settle of curls, "Have you asked him that?"

"No."

"Then how do you know?"

Regina sighs heavily, leaning her head on the cushion as her eyes flutter closed. It's his she sees. Bright blue and drowning her instantly. She'd be lying to say she's never thought about him since the last time she saw him. That night she desperately tried to save his wife. But it's a life she let go, forced away and turned from. Simply walking up to him and saying, _She's sorry_ , for forcing him into a life as a wanted man isn't exactly as easy as it sounds. There is so much more to say to him. So many things she'd like to explain, to ask forgiveness for. But forgiveness is not something that is easily given to her by anyone.

Picking at her nails, she swallows against the lump in her throat and the tears that burn her eyes. "I'm afraid," She confesses quietly.

"Of him?"

She shrugs, but shakes her head. It's not that. But something far more deep seeded as she looks down at her daughter. It's fear of what talking to him could reveal. That maybe they did find each other again, maybe she's found out who is Rose's father, maybe he did forgive her for everything, and just maybe he still loves her the way her heart still flips over for him.

That's a lot of maybe's though.

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…

..

.

He's not felt this hopeless in a long time. Nothing he does seems to help ease the lung rattling tears of his son who clings to a stuffed animal Robin doesn't remember him having. There is much he doesn't remember apparently. Two years of his life, gone. Wiped from his memories. With strange lingering threads to a notion Robin doesn't know if he honestly wants to know about. He does. He's terrified of what they could lead to, but just seeing her here today, holding a little girl in her arms, one that looked so much like her, save for the sky blue eyes, it had his heart squeezing until his breath ran dry.

She's gorgeous. Regina. Still is as stunning as the last time he saw her riding away from him on horseback after saving Marian from the blackguards. Everything about her steals the very words from his mouth, leaving nothing but a muddled mess of his brain behind. Her clothes are different, but she looked every bit a Queen as he knew her to be. An odd feeling still lingers in his stomach after he'd watched her be swept up in a cloud of purple. One that tugged at his core when the spot she'd just been standing was empty. He missed her.

He shouldn't. But he did. Does even still. Which just makes his jumbled mind screw even further. How can he possible miss her when he hasn't seen her in decades? She ruined his life. Forced him into being an outlaw, constantly on the move, running from guards, stealing just to feed himself. She did that. And he doesn't understand why she gave up on them.

It was dangerous, surely. He knows that. Creeping into the Queen's chambers underneath the nose of the King would have had his head on a spike should he have been caught. But it had been five years, and Robin knew every single dark secret corridor, each knight's rotation about her door, and every shadow he could hide in. He was putting his life at risk for her. To see her. To try and make her happy when the days seemed to be ever darkening with the heavy crown that sat on her head.

She just gave it all away.

Resentment burns in his gut, as he strokes through Roland's curls, heart aching at the tear stained cheeks and snotty nose he presses into the stuffed monkey in his tiny grip. He knew her. Called out to her. Crashed into her legs and clung to her skirt. Robin had been frozen to the spot as she knelt down to his son's level, the look in her eyes forever seared into his very being. He could see it. The sincerity behind the confusion. A softness that overtook bewilderment. It made the hairs on the back of his neck stand tall, the beating of his heart hammering in his ears as he watched the three of them cuddled together. They looked like… a family. But that is not possible. It can't be.

His stomach churns and boils violently as he stands, letting Tuck take his seat beside Roland and the tent suddenly seems too small. The canvas walls too close, suffocating out the air within. Running a hand over his face, he pats the clergyman on the shoulder, and without a word, exits the tent, inhaling a cold breath.

He walks, to nowhere in particular, leaving the chatter of the Merry Men behind as the tree's envelope around him. It's calmer out here in the silence. Makes the flurry in his mind swirl into something more clear. He just needs to walk. And think. The later turning out to be the harder of the two as he makes his way between the brush. It's chilly, but a welcome cold against the sweating heat of his skin. The forest has become his home. He understands it better than anything or anyone. Everything within it is simple. It's just leaves, mulch, and animals. There are no secrets, no unsaid words, no betrayals or abandonments. He sits on a log in a clearing, thumbs over the damp moss that clings to the oak bark. Over and over again until his heart decides to follow the suit of the forest and calm into something more manageable.

Tearing three longs blades from the grass beside him, his fingers work smoothly, weaving strip over strip, until a small braid begins to form. It's soft under his fingertips, symmetrical lacing between the blades. It's been some time since he's done this. Taken time just to sit alone with nothing but his thoughts. Thoughts that trickle over to _her_ and this strange longing to see her again. He'd like to talk, he thinks. Has the curious pandering it might be nice to find out why everything happened the way it did. Perhaps he'd be able to find some closure in it all.

A snap of a branch draws his attention to the fact he is alone in the woods and didn't even bring his bow or knife with him. If it's a bear, well, maybe he can scare it off before it decides he's dinner. Standing slowly, he grabs a large branch in his grip, not much for protection but it will be able to make some decent noise against a tree trunk. A couple bushes to his right bristle and he readies his makeshift weapon.

An older man steps between the branches, eyes wide in alarm and hands raised. "I'm sorry I didn't mean to startle you." He stammers out quickly, nodding towards the thick branch in Robin's hand. He lowers it, tosses it to the ground and shakes his head with a much relieved smile.

"It's no problem. I didn't realize anyone else was here."

"Nor I." The man answers, extending a hand in greeting, "Geppetto Marks."

"Robin Locksley."

"It's nice to put a name to the face of earlier today."

Robin shrinks at that, he had forgotten anyone else had been in the hall once his eyes had fallen onto Regina and her daughter. Grimacing he tries to smile, failing miserably, as he shakes Geppetto's firm grip.

"Did you find the answers you were looking for?" The older man questions curiously. Robin's eyebrows rise high, a stammered mumbling of incoherent words following as he tries to figure out how this man knew what he was doing. "Relax, my boy. I too come to the sanctuary of the woods to find peace of mind."

"I think it just made me have more questions."

Geppetto hums knowingly. He saw the interaction between the Queen and this man. The shock of recognition in their matching wide eyes. The way they both infinitesimally moved closer to one another before stepping back. They have a history. A long one too if he truly thinks about the way Robin had whispered out her name in a broken prayer. Perhaps this is why the Mayor is so befuddled right now. Love can do that to a person. Two in fact.

"I always find that work tends to take the mind off of such troubles."

"What makes you think I'm troubled?"

"Being as old as I, it gives you some insight I suppose."

Robin frowns at the answer, but follows the man as he walks towards a solid young oak, palming the study base of it with intent. He pulls a small axe from a toolbox Robin hadn't noticed, curiously watching as Geppetto surveys where the knots and veins form in the bark.

"You plan to cut it down?"

"I have plans to build something." He swings, the smack of steel into wood clacking through the air. It's been a long time since Robin has built anything, used to love it as a child. Widdleling a trunk down into a chair, or Roland's bassinet, little animals they used to play with. He's missed it now that he watches the older man hack down the oak. "Do you mind if I help?"

"I would never say no to a second pair of strong hands." He hands the axe to Robin who accepts the weight gratefully. He smacks the blade against the small cut already formed and a smile breaks out. It feels good. Using his strength to clear his wandering mind. Blow after blow, he breathes it in. Clarity that only comes with hard labour. He breaks the bark with every strike. Feeling more at peace as it cracks and begins to sway to the left. Geppetto moves, holds the trunk that teeters until it finally breaks free from it's base. Together they lower it down to the ground, sweat beading along Robin's forehead as he hands the axe back.

"Thank you. It would have taken me much longer to do alone."

"It's no trouble." He helps tie the ropes around the bark, anchoring it over and over again till Geppetto can slide it with ease across the mossy ground. Robin stills. It's been nice having new company and he doesn't want to give it up just yet. Swallowing back the shy nerves, he steps forward, "Would you mind if I offered my assistance a little more?"

"The pleasure would be mine." Geppetto hands the rope to Robin happily, and they walk silently through the trees together, weaving until they hit a small cabin. "The garage is where my tools are." Hauling the tree into the concrete pad, Robin wipes the sweat from his forehead, loving the ache in his muscles that haven't been used in quite some time. Beside him, Geppetto mulls about in his shed, pulling out a saw and a few whittling tools. "What are you making?"

"You mean we."

Robin takes the saw with a laugh, chuckling out an agreeing _we_ as they turn back to the awaiting bark.

"A rocking chair."

"For someone in particular?"

"The princess."

Robin eyes up the older man who studies the lines in the wood, marking a pencil in a few particular spots they will start cutting. "I'm surprised Snow White doesn't already have one. She seems like the type to have everything ready months before her child's arrival."

It's Geppetto's turn to chuckle, squeezing Robin's shoulder heartily as he finds his eyes. "It's for Regina's daughter." Robin's heart stops, clenches and pants in his chest. Surely this man has no idea about their past decades ago, or even more recently if the lingering in his soul is any indication they have met once more though they may not remember right now. He says nothing, chewing on the information.

Would she even accept this gift knowing he had a hand in creating it?

He tries not to dwell on the question as he and Geppetto work to inch the harsh outer siding away, revealing the soft white creamy bark underneath. It takes them a few hours, Robin's hands working quicker than Geppetto though perhaps not as smooth. Slowly but surely it comes together. Pieces that begin to take shape. A seat, the seven back poles skewered into the rounded top, two arm chairs and a set of legs attached by pins to the rocking metal latches Geppetto had spent most of the evening working on. Together they attach the final pieces, Robin taking extra care to not split any part as they hammer in a few nails and sand down the grit until it's smooth to the touch. It's perfect. Nearly white, though darker lines and knots run through.

"It's turned out quite nicely I'd say."

Robin hums in agreement, rotating the small whittle blade in his palm. It's a beautiful piece, but it feels lacking for something special. And why he wants it to be unique for Regina's daughter he has no idea, but his mind mills over the thought as he kneels down to one of the arms, chewing his lower lip as he slides the blade gently across it's surface. Geppetto says nothing, simply watches curiously from behind as curls of wood pool into the concrete floor. Robin scrapes and carves softly, picking out a few broken fragments with a frown as the shape slowly comes into view. He works silently for a few minutes, finally deciding it's done with a hard puff of air and a quick sand to the etching.

"A rose?"

"It's her name." Robin shrugs, handing the tool back to Geppetto who eyes him up with far too much sparkle and understanding that Robin can figure out how to voice. "I should be getting back to the camp."

They shake hands once more, Robin's eyes lingering on the rocking chair beside them. "I do hope she likes it."

"I have no doubt." Geppetto smiles and Robin walks back into the dense thicket of trees, his mind wandering back to the structure he helped create, his heart tugging at the idea of being there when it is gifted, just to see her eyes and hopefully her smile. It's not going to happen though. He knows that. She will never know he had a hand in its creation.

Perhaps it's for the best.

.

..

…

..

.

Or perhaps fate wants to screw with him. For he stands in front of a large white mansion, hand sweating as he holds onto the back half of the rocking chair. How he'd been coerced into bringing the gift along side Geppetto he will never know. But he saw the old man carting it down the street, and he simply grabbed the wagon handle passed to him without a word and started walking down the road beside the older man. So here he is. Standing behind Geppetto like a scared child listening anxiously to the heels that click on the other side.

She is breathtaking as the oak white door swings open. Standing there with a beaming smile to the older man, who extends a hand in greeting, one she quickly laces with his and Robin oddly wishes it was his hand being allowed to touch her instead. He watches as they hug, and her eyes flicker up to his, widening as she realizes there is someone else here.

"Oh, uh, hi." She stammers, stepping back from Geppetto who moves aside. Her fingers sweep through the silk of her hair, tucking it behind an ear though it falls back in front of her face. He chuckles at her frown towards the defiant strand, mumbles out something close to a _Hello_ back, even if his voice catches tightly in his throat, a blush creeping up his cheeks. He's not some ridiculous school boy filled with butterflies trying to ask a pretty girl out. Though his heart would beg to differ. Her eyes wander across his features, warily and possibly scrutinizing why _he_ is here exactly.

"We have a gift for the little princess." Geppetto comments out happily, gesturing to the rocking chair Robin has set on the porch, not missing the way their eyes linger on one another though they try to hide it rather pathetically.

"I'm surprised you got it done so fast. We only talked about this yesterday." Regina's flushes with a smile to the older man, not daring to look back at Robin.

"I wouldn't have without the help."

Her eyes dart back to the bright blue that crease shyly at her. Well so much for not looking at him. It's something about his eyes, they hold her heart captive, breath tight in her lungs. "You helped make this?"

Robin nods smally, his palm resting on the smooth oak of the chair. "A bit," he admits.

Though Geppetto is quick with a, "Nonsense, I barely had to lift a tool with you there." The older man claps Robin on the shoulder.

"Thank you." Regina bites down on her lower lip, tucking her arms underneath her as if it's protection against him. She doesn't need it. He'd never hurt her. Regardless of their past, that much he knows is true. The door opens wider as Regina pushes it back, gesturing for them to come inside with the present for her daughter. Robin follows quietly, his eyes catching Regina's for a fraction of a moment before she diverts her attention back to Geppetto.

Her home is… just about as beautiful as she. Clean, crisp, light grey walls and white trim. Darker furniture that stands stoically in it's place. Chrome lines the fixtures, a sparkling chandelier hanging in both the foyer Robin toes his shoes off in and the living room he shuffles into. For an odd reason, it seems too cold to be Regina's home. Maybe that's not the right word, but there is a lacking of something within the walls.

"Rose is asleep upstairs in my room, but we can move the chair into the nursery." She calls out from the steps, leading both men up the grand staircase and down the hall to a white door on the left. It doesn't escape Robin's notice, the blue wooden painted letter H that hangs on the opposing side, a drawing of a superhero clearly created by a small child. But he hasn't seen Regina with another kid in tow, though it's plausible he simply hasn't run into the young one yet.

Hauling the chair into the room she stands in, his heart doubles over. It's beautiful. Pale lavender purple with white accents and a black onyx crib half built in the corner. Clearly her husband is taking his time in building their daughters nursery. The thought burns Robin to the core. How dare this man not spend every damn waking second ensuring this place is in tip top ready shape for the little princess. He doesn't like this man. Not a single bit. Huffing indignant at the internal thought that someone else is living here, he slugs the chair into the corner beside the shambled crib, making sure with extra care it sits perfectly aligned and rocks smoothly before he steps back.

"It's stunning." Regina whispers out from behind him, making Robin jump a mile to the side at the proximity of her scent. He's dreamed of that smell. Rich caramel and a hint of wild flowers. He steps back, far enough away his lungs can't breathe her in anymore. Her fingers trace along the smooth lines, over the back arch and down to the arm that he'd carved the rose into. For a moment he hopes he didn't cross a line with the addition. He hasn't exactly met Rose, but it just felt right giving the chair something unique, just for her. He hears Regina sniff, her hand flying up to wipe away a tear as she beams down at the rocker. "I love it. I can't thank you enough for this."

"It was no trouble." Geppetto tips his hat, "Like I said, I barely touched a hammer building it." His grey blue eyes flicker over to Robin who has resigned himself to the farthest spot in the room, closest to the door, just in case he needs to escape. Regina turns, looks as though she is about to say something to him, his heart stumbling over itself waiting for her words, but a small cry echoes from down the hallway and her gaze flies out the door.

She sighs, rubbing her hand across her stomach gently, "I thought she'd sleep a little longer." The exhaustion is apparent in her voice as she smiles.

"The little princess already beats to the tune of her own drum I gather." Geppetto squeezes Regina's shoulder softly who lets a heavy breath go.

"She's been non stop crying since yesterday." Her eyes glance up to Robin. "I had kind of hoped it had tired her out to be honest." She confesses quietly, moving around the older man and towards Robin. Well towards the door, but his feet are frozen in anticipation of the distance she closes.

"Well, perhaps it's a good thing this delivery came when it did." Geppetto follows her out into the hall, leaving Robin to stand alone in the nursery.

He doesn't linger long. Takes one last look around the room with a small grin, one that falters the second he sees the half made crib lying in the corner. With a huff, he closes the door, ears perking at the soft wave of Regina's voice in what he suspects is her room as she soothes her baby girl. For the life of him he can't move. Geppetto has already bid her a goodbye and walked down the steps, but Robin is stuck to the hardwood floors.

Her eyes are on the purple blanket swaddled into her arms, a happy smile creasing her cheeks as she steps out of her room, baby in tow. He sees the small fist stretching out from the cocoon, a tiny whine echoing into his ears. "Are you hungry, sweet girl?" Regina cooes down into her daughter, nuzzling her nose against Rose's forehead, not realizing that Robin is still standing there like an idiot, enraptured by the pair of them.

She damn near walks into him before she notices he's still there. A half frightened gasp escaping as her arms collide with his chest. "Jesus. Robin. You scared me." She steps away, her eyes wide and anxious at his presence. Why is he even still here? She thought he'd left with Geppetto. Her heart clenches tightly as he simply stands there, palms flying up in apology, though he says nothing, just stares at her. At both of them. His eyes falling down to her daughter who has decided to calm down at this particular moment as she too realizes that he is here.

"BA! Ba! Ba! BA!" Her arms squirm as she screeches out towards him. "Rose. Hush. It's okay." Regina rocks her daughter up into a sitting position, apparently laying in her arms just isn't going to fly. She squeals and wriggles in the purple swaddled blanket, eyes locked onto Robin's as she leans forward, reaching out in an unsaid plea for him to take her. It has Regina's eyes arching high into her hairline, hands hugging her daughter a fraction tighter to her.

For all she knows, Robin is here to take her away. It wouldn't be the first time someone took away her child. Fire blooms in her stomach at the thought. There isn't a chance in hell that she is going to let it happen a second time. She has no idea how he is here. Why he decided to suddenly play _friends_ and help make her daughter a gift. That's not their history. They don't have that sort of relationship with one another. Theirs is one of betrayal (at least on her part), loneliness (again on her part), and surely anger that stems from what she did to him.

"Why are you here?" The words are harsh as she tips Rose back into her arms and away from him. Her eyes flare with suspicion as his widen. His mouth parts as though he's going to explain, but his jaw tightens as he swallows his explanation. She scowls, much the same as the frown that creeps onto his face as he looks away from Rose and up to her. Her gut flutters at the look in his eyes. It's pained. There isn't a hint of rage sparking within the confused blue. It strikes her as odd. Perhaps he is trying to play her, manipulate his way into her home. Her magic fires at her fingertips and she growls out again, "Robin. What are you doing here?"

He doesn't really know. Sure he was helping with the rocking chair, but he could have left after that. But the thought of seeing her a little longer, getting a chance to gaze upon her daughter had been more than enough to beat down the blaring in his brain that he needed to go. Swallowing in a breath, his tongue darting out to lick the dryness on his lower lip, he trails his eyes over the little girl who stares at him with wonderment, a drastic contrast to the accusing glare of her mother.

"Robin."

He shakes himself from his frozen stupor with a stammered, "I'm sorry. I'll go." He moves lightning quick, swinging around the banister rail and down the steps, sweat pooling along his brow with every stair.

"Wait." She calls out after him, halfway down the steps herself by the time he's hit the foyer. Slowly, he turns on the spot, unsure of what to say, but his heart stampedes like a race horse, threatening to break every rib in his body if he doesn't do exactly what she's asked and wait. He can see the nerves that skitter over her skin as she switches her daughter from hip to hip, the way her lungs seem to rattle with the dragging inhale she takes before taking a single step down towards him.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have been rude to you after what you gave Rose."

He's stunned. She's apologizing to him for invading her home uninvited. "It's alright." He tucks his shaky hands into his pockets as she reaches the bottom landing. Why he can't seem to control this bloody urge to reach out and touch her, he is absolutely amiss to. His jacket pockets seeming like the only way to stop him from lacing his fingers with her own.

She is close, barely a few short feet away, and she looks small without the grandeur of a royal gown and staggeringly tall heels. It's oddly endearing. Being flat footed, hair loosely hung about and her silk blouse has her coming off rather quaint and dainty. Like he could just pick her up and put her in his pocket should he wish, take her wherever he wanted to go. Not that she would necessarily come with him.

"I think we should probably talk." Her voice quiet as it ghosts around him. She's right. They do need to talk. He needs to figure out how he and his merry men got to this place. Though that may be the last thing he asks her in all honesty. A few other questions tug at his heart with a bit more grip.

He nods before really even thinking about the fact he's about to sit down beside, or well near her, and actually have a chance to hear what he desperately wants to know.

Who is this little girl's father?

TBC.


	23. Chapter 23

**Tethered To You 23**

He's not sure there has been a more tense, awkward moment he's sat through in his entire life.

She hasn't said anything.

He hasn't said anything.

Regina's just sits in a cream arm chair with Rose tucked into her arms, avoiding his eyes as she lingers her gaze solely on her daughter who babbles contently in her blanket. While he nervously twiddles his thumbs and tries to catch her gaze every now and then.

A clock ticks behind him, a deafening noise compared to the silence that encompasses both of them. It's just quiet. Except for the small babbling of that beautiful little girl. The sweet gurgling is a nice distraction from the lump in his throat voiding his ability to make a sentence or mere words attempt to form.

He just sits. And waits. Nervously licking dry lips and readjusting every few seconds on the sofa.

Regina is stiff in her chair, he can see it clear as day, what with her spine erect, knee bouncing erratically, teeth biting down on her lower lip. If he didn't know better he'd say she almost looks afraid of him. Perhaps she is waiting for him to speak first.

But his mouth is dry like the bloody desert, throat tight and chest constricting with every shaky inhale he pulls. He wants to say something, but instead he just looks around the room, taking in the simple, regal decor. She's got nice taste. If one was into hard lines, and far too clean surfaces.

He feels out of place, what with the dirt that is on his pants, saw dust under his nails and the apparent smell of sweat and forest that clings to him. A shower. He should have had a shower before coming here and overtaking the soft cardamon and lavender aroma of her home.

She swallows audibly, blinking her eyes quickly up to his before bouncing away once more. His eyes land on a silver picture frame. One that houses a beautiful photograph of her and a young boy wrapped up in her arms, beaming like the sun.

The young boy doesn't much look like Regina though, physically at least. His eyes are green, hair a soft brown, freckles across his pink cheeks. He must resemble his father. Robin's heart burns at the idea of the other man. One who clearly isn't around much, nor seems to care about the state of his daughter's half made nursery crib. What kind of man doesn't put in the time with his family? An idiot, that's what kind. Scoffing at the conjured image of the father, Robin turns away from the photo and finds Regina's eyes watching him curiously.

He flushes, caught red handed. Shifting back into the couch, his fingers fiddle with the threads fraying on the hem of his coat. "That's my son. Henry." Her voice is quiet, filled with love and something he doesn't miss, longing. He nods, not wanting her to start talking about her absent husband in all honesty. This streak of jealousy that flares up in him needing to stay hidden for he still needs to figure out why this bothers him so much.

It shouldn't. But it does.

"He's a handsome lad." He manages a gently honest smile.

The sadness is palpable in the small smile that barely creeps onto her lips as she looks at the picture, a quiet, "Thank you," answered in return as she lingers on the photo rather glumly, like she has lost her most prized possession.

He wants to get off this damn couch and hug her. Won't. But wants to. Almost desperately.

They fall back into a silence. Robin goes back to wringing his hands tightly in his lap. But he watches the way her eyes trade between he and Rose not so subtly, filled with fearful curiosity he'd like nothing more than to ask her about.

The bright sapphire of their matching eyes burns her heart.

How is it possible that they look so much alike?

She notices it more now that he is sitting here. Whilst everyone may say her daughter is a mini version of her, she suddenly is beginning to notice that the shape of Rose's eyes are much akin to Robin's almond ones. The slope of her nose tending a likeness toward his. And even if most six month old babies have dimples in their chubby cheeks when they smile, Rose's are always there, quite similar to another pair she adores, well adored a long time ago. Not now. She doesn't now. At least she doesn't think she does.

Her eyes betray the command to stay down, and her heart stumbles over itself as she sees them, his dimples, hidden behind dark blonde stubble.

A shiver rolls up her spine and she swallows the lump in her throat. She should not be this affected by him. Not this way. There is too much resentment he should be holding against her for this feeling in her stomach to even be happening.

Maybe it's just post pregnancy hormones.

But.

If they are missing two years of their life being in the Enchanted Forest, could it even be possible that she and Robin met again?

There is potential for it to have happened.

He lived there in all reality. It was a fault in the curse that he stayed behind. Well not a fault, she didn't exactly intend to leave him there, nor bring him with her, he wasn't who she was thinking about, not really. But thanks to her mother a large portion of the forest was forever frozen in time, and Robin trapped inside it.

She remembers waking up in Storybrooke and the weeks that followed. The pride that swelled in her heart at all the people who had no idea who they were, and who they were missing. She'd taken away their happy endings. She'd won.

But it turned out they weren't the only ones missing another person. Many had been left behind, and though she dare not breathe a word of it into the sky lest someone heard her miserable ailments, her heart sighed heavily when it became apparent that _he_ wasn't here.

It may have been nice just to know that he was close by. To see him every now and then. Talk to him about the silly on goings of this town for no reason besides the fact she wanted to hear his voice. Play pretend that she hadn't ruined his life all those years ago. Even if he had a family he loved, she could have watched them from afar. Maybe they could have been friends… but then again, maybe it was better he hadn't been a part of the town back then. She doesn't really have friends anyway. Not exactly by choice either.

So yes, they could have met again. Granted seeing each other is completely different than making a child together. She wouldn't have done this with just anyone. Fallen in love with just anyone. Actually there is probably no one aside from Daniel and dare she say it Robin that she would have wanted this with. A family.

"How does my son seem to know who you are?" His question mumbles out as he finally looks at her. Truly looks at her. Beautiful as he remembers from decades ago. Her chocolate silky hair shakes as she shrugs and sinks back into the armchair.

"Honestly, I have no idea." She admits, running a palm over her daughter's soft black fuzz. "Did you ever…"

"No." He interrupts her, "I've never spoken of you to him, or anyone for that matter." He sighs out rather sullenly.

"Oh." She just nods and drops her eyes from his, and if he is being truthful, she almost looks hurt at his answer. "Maybe it's a side effect of this memory curse?"

"That my son was given false memories?"

"It's possible." Regina shrugs.

He frowns at that. It doesn't feel like the truth, settles like a hard stone in his stomach.

"Have you any idea who cursed us?"

"Sadly no." Regina exhales heavily through her nose, shifting Rose from one arm to the other, her vacant limb stretching out to ease the pins and needles of holding the babies ever growing weight. Everyday she seems to be getting bigger. "I don't even have the slightest clue either."

It's Robin's turn to nod rather dully. And the mood is utterly pitiful around them. But he looks at her and his heart thrashes against his ribcage, attempting a jailbreak apparently, perhaps it wishes to leap into her open hand as those she is trying to steal it from him… though he is not sure if she could steal something he'd given her once before.

She looks good like this. Being a mother. Natural. As if she was born to be one. His thoughts wander to the night he'd found her crying quietly by the hearth in her bedchambers as the young Queen. He'd known she was pregnant, though she didn't tell him. He could see it. The change in her posture, and how her hand unconsciously roamed along a swell that wasn't even visible yet.

Secretly to himself, he had imagined it was his child she had been carrying rather than that loathsome King's. A bastard of a man Robin still wishes to this day he could have knocked one arrow through, or maybe more. Definitely more. One for every tear the King had made Regina shed. For every single bruise and scrape, both visible and under the surface.

But it wasn't so simple. She was pregnant and the Queen. And he was what? A shadow that crept into her chambers to keep her company. He barely made enough at the inn to be allowed a room to stay, half the time there wasn't even enough coin to spare for a meal. It was hard, putting on the face for her that everything was in tip top shape for him, never letting her see how his stomach rumbled at the sight of her untouched food. And still he never left her. Not once.

A whole life he'd created in the recesses of his mind while she had been pregnant. For a spare few weeks it flourished in his soul. How they lived in a handsome cottage on a hillside lake, happy and in love with a gaggle of children running about. He being allowed to tell her every sun rise how much he loved her, and show her every single night and they'd be happy.

But she'd lost the King's baby and his secret little imaginary world with it.

His heart had never ached so terribly in his whole life seeing the welling of tears in her eyes as she stared silently into the flames, curling her tiny frame into his arms and crying till dawn rose the next morning.

A bitter memory forever burned into his mind.

"What's the last thing you remember?" He asks. Regina shakes her head, blooming a soft purple pacifier into her palm that Rose greedily attacks. "It's a long story, one I don't honestly want to live through again." She grimaces, "But in short, Pan had cursed Storybrooke and we were all to return to the Enchanted Forest. I let Henry go with Emma across the townline before the magic took us back."

"Your son Henry?"

She nods with a sad sniff and a half hearted smile.

"You named him after your father." His eyebrows raise. He'd only met the man a few times, had quite enjoyed his company too. He was a soft soul, kind and gentle in his love for his daughter, though Robin could see the loss in his eyes in how to help her escape the prison of being a Queen.

"I did. I wish they could have met each other."

"Your father is not here?"

Regina stills at that, shrinks in her chair and flicks her eyes to the photo of her and her son. "No. He's not." Her voice trembles as a sheen covers her gaze.

Robin's heart falters at the pain etched across her face. "I'm sorry."

"Thank you." She swallows back hard, blinking away the tears on her lashes. "I miss them."

He doesn't want her to be in anguish like this, not because of him. Perhaps changing the subject to something lighter would be best. The idea is easier said than done however, he's not exactly sure what to say. Rose however seems to decide its her turn to pipe up, babbling out happy nonsense into the obviously tense air that surrounds her parents. Regina is quick to smile at the outburst, rocking her baby girl back and forth as little socked feet flail gleefully about. The sight of Regina's smile as her finger is gripped tightly into a chubby fist has Robin's heart doubling over.

They are perfect together, a beautiful little pair.

"Thank you." Regina whispers out a bit shocked at the apparent vocal admission Robin thought was only going through his mind. A flush runs into his cheeks at the not to silent comment. He nods, bites down on his lip shyly and lets his eyes wander away from Regina's and back down to the soft dark thicket of hair of the baby girl. She truly does look like a miniature version of her mother.

"How old is she?"

"I think around 6 months?"

Robin frowns at Regina's answer, and she quickly catches onto his confusion. "I honestly don't remember having her. Apparently I got pregnant in the two years we don't remember."

His heart skips a beat.

"So you aren't certain who her father is?"

Her eyes flick to his, whiskey brown pools of uncertainty, but he could swear he see's the wonder behind them, dare he say it, even a hopeful longing he finds himself questioning as well. His heart thumps hard in his chest, a shaky hand moving from his lap and slowly reaches out to touch her bouncing knee.

She stares down at his palm, ever so warm even with the denim barrier between their skin. It tingles, in a strange way she could swear is oddly familiar. Rose squeals between them, a puff of champange pink blossoming out between her little hands. It sinks into Regina's skin, seeps down to the spot where Robin's hand still lingers till it glows ruby red, glittering in golds as Robin removes his palm from her, gaping down at his palm that sparkles before dissipating into his skin.

"What was that?" He breathes quietly stunned, flexing his fingers as the warm tingle edges it's way his arm and into his heart, seemingly easing it's tornado erratic beating. Regina just stares at her thigh. Why does that color, that sparkle of gold and red seem so familiar, so intimately natural. She's read about it, why some magic contains that diamond glisten. Pixie Dust. The visual rope that tethers true love together, a connection of the soul.

It's impossible though. She has to be mistaken. Perhaps Rose simply has different stems in her magical abilities. It can't be Pixie Dust. It's absolutely impossible that it is, what she thinks it is. That Robin is her soulmate. It can't be true. She ruined his life. Surely that would condemn this possibility on the spot. People that have this connection are supposed to live happily ever after, be in love for all their lives, not be separated by choice, if it really was even a choice to save him.

She had to.

She did what she did all those years ago to spare him, to give him a chance at a life not clouded by fear. If the king had found out about her _friend_ , that stowed himself away in her world, hidden by shadows and stealth, well Robin would have been executed on the spot. And Regina would have rather died a thousand deaths than see someone die in front of her once again, someone she loved. It happened before, and she barely survived Daniel's murder.

Losing Robin would have been the last fatal wound cut into her heart. She had to let him go. Isn't that what they say? If you love someone enough, you should let them go. A horrid notion, being forced to turn away from a person that is the only ray of light in the darkness just so they too don't get swallowed whole by the storm.

"Are you alright?" His voice is soft, breaking her out of the myriad of past memories. Why is he even here? Sitting with her, talking to her, touching her. He should be full of anger and hate for what she did. She knows he doesn't understand the dangers he was putting himself in by staying at her side all those years ago. Well, perhaps he did, but simply didn't care. And that in itself was dangerous. Putting her happiness before his own safety. It had torn her to pieces, but she had to make that decision for him.

"Regina?"

Her eyes flick up to his, bright sky blue in color, that dark hazel blue rim with speck of emeralds embedded within. He has beautiful eyes. She loves his eyes. Has never told him that, but she did, or does? She isn't really sure right now. But they make her feel safe. A simple gaze he holds can beat off all the nerves that clench her lungs and quiet the pounding of her heart.

"Can I get you some water?"

She nods, and he is quick to stand, but Rose wails in Regina's arms as she watches him walk away. Robin turns, kneeling down beside the little girl whose blue eyes water in thick puddles. "It's alright little Rosie, I'm just going to get your mama some water." He coos softly at the red tinted angry cheeks, fiddling with a purple clothed foot. Regina watches as her daughter stares at Robin, trying to figure out whether he is telling the truth or not it appears. He stands again, and Rose screams, wriggling and twisting in Regina's arms defiantly.

It takes Robin a moment, chewing on his lip, trying to figure out the boundaries here. His heart apparently winning over as he shyly asks, "Do you mind if I hold her?" Regina's head snaps up to him, eyes wary and wide. He can see the fear in them and his heart breaks as he squats back down, lowering himself so he is the one looking up at her and not the other way around.

Without even thinking his hands reach for her own again, ones that are tightly wrapped around her daughter. God he's missed her hands. His thumb strokes over her left hand, unconsciously searching for a ring that isn't there on a particular finger.

"I would never take her from you like that Regina."

She inhales shakily.

"I promise you. I would never ever do that to you."

She hears it in his voice, the underlying omission that he would never hurt her. After all these years and all the pain she's caused him, he wouldn't do that to her, never had. Rose stretches her arms out to Robin again, leaning her entire body up and out of Regina's arms, deciding for her mother that she is going to her father regardless of her parents decision. She lets her go without a fight, stunning even herself that she is relinquishing her most prized possession aside from Henry.

Robin curls Rose into his chest, sitting her tiny diapered bottom on a forearm so Rose can sit up against his torso as another hand rests gently on her back, smoothing softly up and down her onesie. For a little girl who is rather shy around strangers, Regina is shocked at the sight of her daughter snuggling into a man as though she knows who he is, one she's never met before. They just fits. Strong arms that hug around a small body as though she is the most delicate thing in the entire world.

"Now how about you and I go get your mama some water together hmm?"

Robin bumps his nose into Rose's forehead as she burrows into his neck, babbling softly into the soft tunic gripped into her chubby fists. For a moment, Regina's eyes lock onto her daughters bright blue ones, contentment radiating through every single speck of them.

"Ice?"

Her eyes flick up to Robin's, her heart stopping at the identical coloring, "What?"

He chuckles, swaying gently back and forth, "Would you like some ice with your water?"

"Oh. Yes please." Regina mumbles out, uncertain how to deal with the sudden barrage of emotion that floods into her.

"One ice cold water coming right up." He turns, happily bouncing Rose in his arms as they make way into Regina's kitchen. The living room falls into silence as Regina watches them go, and though it's quiet around her, her mind runs a thousands miles a minute. Nothing makes sense right now. How is it possible she feels okay with the prospect of Robin taking her daughter, granted just into the next room but still. There is none of the hesitation she'd been expecting anymore. No angry fired words thrown her way at what she did to him. Not a single laced look of hatred or contempt in his eyes.

"Regina?"

She turns to the sound of his voice, seeing him standing rather sheepishly with Rose in his arms in the kitchen archway. Her eyebrow cocks high curiously.

"I admit that while I had every intention on bringing you a glass of water, I have no idea where to get it from."

It bubbles up from her gut, breaks through her tightly constricted throat and through her teeth. A burst of laughter. Such a foreign sound that her hand quickly flies up to cover her mouth. He's from the enchanted forest. There isn't exactly running tap water and glasses there. At least not where he lived there wasn't.

Righting herself, she stands, walking up to the pair with a shy smile as she passes. Her hand runs over Rose's back as she nuzzles her cheek quickly. Robin swallows audibly, Regina suddenly realizing just how close she is to him, standing near chest to chest against him, her hand resting on his forearm softly.

His chin tips down the same second hers tips up, and if she was brave, if she had a shred of it in her right now, it would have been far too easy to close the distance between their lips.

She could do it. Swallows hard at the thought of it. Being brave.

His lungs pulse in a steady heavy rhythm, the warm radiating off his skin as he just stands there, staring down at Regina who stares at his lips for a long, seemingly never ending moment.

He could do it. Lean that fraction down and do it. Kiss her like he's only dreamt of doing, a notion that is both terrifying and demanding all at once.

Her tongue darts out to wet the plump redness of her lips, lips he wants to taste, ones he would rather soothe the dryness out of instead.

He could do it.

He is going to do it.

Takes the first step in this overwhelming need to taste her, lowering his chin down just enough that he is mere inches away from her lips, and he waits for her to pull back, or push him away.

She doesn't.

She could do it. Wants to do it. To lift herself up onto her tiptoes and kiss him.

She feels the way his breath deepens as his head tips down a touch, enough that is has her heart lurching into her throat. He wants to kiss her.

Her palm slides up from his arm to his chest, just above the steady beat of his heart, her fingertips being able to touch the exposed skin on his neck, feeling the light spattering of stubble that curls up into a strong cut jaw. His eyes want close at the sensation. This unbelievable feeling of well feeling her touch him. It's like a lifeline he didn't know he was searching for. But he can't close his eyes, out of fear that this is just a hopeful figment of his imagination.

The warmth of her breath puffs out against his lips, so damn close he swears he can taste the sweetness of her mouth already. But he won't move until she does. Won't take this from her. Being the one in control. Knows enough of her past that she needs to have some semblance of decision making in what happens. Loathe as he is, he begs his heart to quiet down, forces the urge to simply angle into the last fraction between them.

"Ba!" Rose squeals out between them, and Regina jumps back, eyes wide as her hand flies to cover her lips. They'd been so close. Shaking off what just about happened, Regina curls a lock of hair behind her ear, avoiding Robin's gaze all the while as he stands there, rooted to the spot, clearly just as stunned and perhaps a little put off by the intrusion into the moment that just about happened.

"Were we ignoring you my little one." Regina chuckles into Rose's cheek, finally letting her eyes flick up to Robin's. He smiles, a small soft thing that has Regina's stomach flipping in knots.

He wanted to kiss her.

Rose giggles out, bumping her head back into Robin's chest, with feet kicking happily about into the air now that she is getting some attention finally. It makes Robin laugh, the scrunch in the little girl's nose, mirroring one her mother has down to a T. An adorable display of their dismay.

"About that water." Regina smiles rather shyly, moving a step back and turning into the kitchen. Robin settles himself against the island, Rose still in tow, as he watches Regina move so effortlessly around, grabbing two glasses instead of one. It feels nice. Standing here with her. Being able to be around her once more. The strange thought runs across his mind that he could do this forever. Stand here with her.

It's just that, well she is beautiful. Beneath the hard exterior he knows her to put on as a front, what's underneath is stunning. A softness that very few actually know about. The kindness she holds in her heart, pure and wishing for freedom from the walls she buries it behind. He had figured that if he ever did get a chance to see her again, speak with her, that it would have been so much different than it is right now. In his mind, he figured there would have been screaming and yelling, vengeful harsh words gritted back and forth. And yet, for all that has happened between them, he can't find it in himself to even search for a shred of anger to toss her way.

Doesn't even want to if he is being completely honest. Perhaps what is in the past, just needs to stay there. There is very little point in bringing up old wounds he doesn't want to reopen when this, standing here, with her daughter in his arms is probably the most at peace he's felt since well, he actually doesn't know when.

Maybe she is wrong. Maybe the reason his son seems to know her, isn't because of some magical repercussion. Perhaps it could be not just a longing lingering hope that they found each other under better circumstances. It's a pretty big maybe, but his heart beat nothing but solid assurances to the doubt in his mind.

He smiles at the tired "Ba." that sweeps from the baby girl tucked into his arms, the way she curls herself in tight to his chest and thick dark lashes flutter closed. Robin nuzzles into Rose, cradling her closer to him as he sways gently back and forth, running his hand up and down her back and over the soft curls of chocolate brown hair.

"Maybe I am your Ba sweet girl."

His eyes flicker up, finding Regina standing still a few feet away from him, eyes watering as she bites down on a trembling lip. She looks terrified. He didn't want that. To intrude on her like this, making a verbal assumption about something he has no idea if it's even possible. He shouldn't have even said it, didn't really mean to out loud but it's there, hanging between them now.

"Regina, I-" He goes to start, but she is quick to cut him off. "Would you have forgiven me?"

"What?" His brow creases together at her question. Regina swallows, tucks a lock of hair behind her ear, and looks straight at him. "For what I did. Would you have forgiven me?" Her breath shakes out as her arms curl around her stomach protectively, eyes wandering back down to Rose who sleeps soundly in his arms. He doesn't know the answer really, but it feels like his heart has already done what his mind isn't sure of yet. It's with a shrug of his shoulders and a simple smile, he takes a gentle step towards her, not wanting to scare her off, but desperate to wipe away the tears that are gathering in her eyes. She doesn't even flinch when he stops just in front of her, watches, perhaps a touch disbelieving, as his hand moves to cup her cheek and thumb swipes away the wetness on her lower lashes.

"You make mistakes, we all have. And I think, it's time we move past them."

A tear falls before he can catch it, but it is caught on the cotton of his shirt as she buries herself into his chest, beside her daughter whose yet to move from her dreamworld. Robin curls his free arm around Regina's shoulders, pressing her as tight as he can into his body, relishing the feeling of being able to hold her again. Tears be damned, a few escape his eyes as he tucks his chin down into the crown on her hair, inhaling the sweet caramel richness that's lingered in the back of his mind for decades.

"I missed you."

"And I you."

And he has. So damn much.

 **TBC.**


	24. Chapter 24

**Tethered To You 24**

It's been two days.

Two rather long dull days of Robin doing nothing but sitting in his camp amongst the loud merriment of the men, and he's completely oblivious to their words for all he can think about is her. The way her eyes softened when he pulled her into his arms, the feeling of utter relief sinking out of her shoulders, the tears that ran dry against the cotton of his shirt when she hugged him back. It felt like home to him. Holding her. Holding her daughter.

It was natural, cradling them both tight, like he was always meant to do it. To be there with them.

But there are so many unanswered questions still. They didn't discuss any of it. Why Roland seems to know Regina and Rose ever so adamantly. Why Robin has this strange feeling of deja-vu being with the two of them. How it's possible that there isn't a shred of anger or resentment to be found within his heart directed towards the woman who altered his entire world when all he wanted was to make her happy. He should be filled with it. There should be this need to demand answers for why she did what she did all those years ago. Forcing him from her side and into a life on the run. And yet all he wants to do is be near her once again. He'd have been happy enough to just stand in the kitchen together, the past a long forgotten memory now that she was in his arms once more.

He sits on the log by his tent, thinking about the way she'd smiled, a bashful shy thing that sent his heart into his throat. The way she had sniffed far to adorably into the sleeve of her shirt and blinked those beautiful brown eyes up at him. It took every bloody ounce of strength he had not to kiss her right then and there. He wanted to. Desperately so. But there is still much unsaid and unanswered between them. But it wasn't answers from the past he was seeking, but the ones directed silently at the small sleeping bundle breathing heavily against his neck.

" _Ba"._ A silly ridiculous bumbled word from her perfect pink pout. But it was a word he swears he's heard before. Reverberating in his brain all muffled and fuzzy. He can't place why he knows it, why it feels so familiar. His heart still tingles in those tiny sparks from the strange plume of pink magic that smoked out of Rosie's chubby hand. It felt like a memory. The softness of it. He knew that feeling, intimately so.

For the first time in a long time, Robin can't shake the feeling that something is different within him, something that he had felt so strongly for her before from decades ago is beginning to surface again. And he there have been moments in the past two days while he has sat amongst the Merry Men, that he ponders the idea of not wanting this curse they appear to be under to break. If there is a chance that it's providing him a way to be with Regina again, to be a part of her life, a significant member in her world, well just maybe having memories stolen isn't such a bad thing.

Roland hasn't stopped talking about Regina either. Questioning his father every second of the day about her. Why they aren't with her? How come she doesn't remember them? Or for that matter why Robin fails to remember her as well. It's confusing and while he tries to comfort the sad tears in his son's eyes, he truly doesn't have any of the answers. He wants to have them, but doesn't.

Much like his son, Robin's simply sat in a strange turmoil over it all. Listens to the stories Roland recalls about horseback riding, picnics by the lake, playing her bedchambers, snuggling at night, and tales of scary monkey's Regina had saved them all from.

That last one had peaked Robin's interest the most. Roland sleeps with a grey stuffed monkey. One Robin can't figure out where his boy got it from, and he absolutely refuses to be parted with the toy. And there are scars on his torso that he can't recall ever acquiring in a battle. Five thin white lines that resemble claw marks far too closely, a tightness in the skin that isn't from an old injury.

He'd inspected the marks with a frown late yesterday afternoon, thumbing along them as a foreign heat radiated from them against his palm. It's too neat to have been stitched back together by Tuck or any of the merry men. He has those jagged lines from their handy work. But these ones, they are perfect lines that etch from hip to rib cage. It makes him wonder about the marks that adorn his back from a whipping post, ones he almost died from if she hadn't been there.

They match.

The ones on both his front and back have this certain sheen and shine to them that aren't there in any of his other scars. It's a remnant of her magic. Which can only mean that Roland's stories must have some shred of truth to it.

"Papa, can we go to the park today?"

He smiles down at his son's face that is covered in red juices from the raspberries they'd picked earlier that morning. It's a beautiful day, and Robin can't see why he and his son could just take the afternoon and play together. Perhaps it will take his mind off Regina.

Roland fidgets at the sleeve of his father's wiping across his mouth in an attempt to clean the sweet juice trickles. Robin chuckles at the feeble attempt of avoidance, and nod's, swings Roland into his lap and ruffles his curly mop of hair. "Of course my boy. Why don't you go put on a clean shirt and we will go."

"Do you think Regina will be there?"

Robin's heart stutters, "I don't know."

"Maybe if we are lucky she will be!" Roland wiggles out of Robin's arms and heads to their tent, fumbling with the hem of his shirt he tears off. Robin watches him the entire way, a small smile creeping into his lips.

"Let luck be on our side then." He whispers to no one but himself and the sky.

.

..

…

..

.

Regina hasn't slept for two days. Can't find the escape her tired mind needs when her heart continues to beat at a furious pace into all hours of the night. He's here. They actually spoke, not about the darker deeds of their past, but it didn't really seem to matter. She asked if he would have forgiven her for what she did, full ready for his anger and resentment to be unleashed on her. Much to her shock, he had just smiled, shrugged his shoulders and quietly absolved her of all the heavy guilt.

Just like that. With a hug and a hand carding through her hair as she cried, this weight on her chest had lifted, and she feels like she can breathe, fully for the first time in decades.

He forgives her.

But that now just leaves her with all these... _feelings_ , for lack of a better term. Feelings she has no idea where to place or what to do with, hence the inability to sleep at night. She simply lays there, grinning rather dumbly as she stares at the popcorn ceiling of her bedroom just for the fact that there is this underlying pine scent that has seemingly seeped into her skin and around her heart. She knows that smell, has kept it a hidden secret for years, and now it's back in full force. Her personal security blanket that swaddles her tight.

And with the dopey grin that ceases to fall from her lips, there is also so much confusion that resides within. His son knew her, and her daughter and in equal return. For a daughter that is normally so shy, Rose seemed far too comfortable with both the little boy and Robin. She had gone so willingly into Robin's arms, snuggled into his chest and dare Regina think it, she smiled a gummy sleepy thing as he rocked her back and forth.

The sight had stolen her the breath from her lungs. Seeing her daughter at such peace cradled in the arms of a man Regina never thought she'd ever see again.

And she called him "Ba." That silly singular word her daughter mouths at all hours of the day.

It seemed completely directed his way, and perhaps as unfathomable as it seems, maybe there is a chance, a flicker of hope that Robin and herself had made amends, and made something even more precious.

She won't know for certain until they get their memories back, but the thought still sits in her heart rather happily compared to the fear she would have assumed accompany this potential revelation. But how to break a curse when she has no idea who cast it isn't exactly an easy feat.

Stretching as the morning sun begins to break through the white sheer curtains, Regina lets her eyes trail down to Rose, whose bright blue eyes are staring wide awake at her though she's yet to make a sound. Seems like Regina isn't the only early riser in the mornings. Like mother like daughter. As soon as they make eye contact, Rose's legs fly into the air, kicking about when Regina smooths her hand over the pink soft onesie.

"Good morning my little one."

Rose babbles out happily at the nose kisses Regina bends down to affection her daughter with, a fist scrambling out reaching to clasp onto a fallen lock of long chocolate brown hair. It's with a chuckle, and a bit of effort to get Rose to release her, that Regina settles back into the pillows, Rose happily seated on her lap. It never fails to steal a beat from Regina's heart at how much her daughter looks like her, save for the eyes. It's like looking at a mini replica of herself. It just cements the fact that she actually made her, Rose is hers.

There will be no knock at her door that reveals a birth parent coming to claim a child back. The memories of those first months with Emma Swan and her demands that Henry was better off with her had been absolute torture and downright unlawful. It was a closed adoption. Henry was Regina's by law and more importantly by love. And the thought of someone coming to try and take Rose away from her is unthinkable. She's lost one child, she will not lose a second.

"Ba!"

The squeal brings Regina back to the present and far away from the past, and she smiles at her daughter, the black fuzz that sits a touch awry from sleep, bright blue eyes that sparkle, pink chubby gums that bust out in a gurgle. She's far too cute to be Regina's, but she is hers, and it's the best feeling.

"Ba! Ba! Ba!"

"What is it my girl? What does that mean?"

Rose's brow creases for a moment before her legs kick out wildly with a high pitched screech, and thankfully she's not exactly heavy enough to break Regina's rib with the impact. "Ba! Ba!" Her arms flail about, as she bounces rather erratically in Regina's arms.

"Oh baby, if I knew what you meant, I'd give it to you. I swear."

"Ba!"

A puff of pink magic bursts out of the teeny palms that smack into Regina's cheek with a smack and instantly the tingle she's come to associate with her daughters magic blooms out and Regina's eyes fuzz out as a picture comes into view.

At first, she can't figure out where she is, it's all stone ground and a purple stitched blanket beneath her. There is the sound of muffled voices behind her, and a warm palm on her back rubbing softly up and down. Small fists bunch at the lavender fabric below as a velvet blue gown comes into eyesight, cascading down into a puddle as she see's well herself sit down with a happy smile.

It's a memory. Rose's memory to be more exact. On her stomach on a blanket, staring up at Regina in a dress that is clearly from the Enchanted Forest. She watches as well herself settles onto the floor, beaming brighter than the sun, a smile Regina's never actually seen grace her own face. It's honestly some what startling to see herself so outwardly happy. Behind her she hears boots shuffle, a burst of "Gina!" echoing about the walls as Rose turns her head, best as she can, and see's a tiny brown cloak slam into Regina's awaiting arms. A myriad of laughter bubbles from all sides and a warm weight pats gently on Rose's back.

"Helly my little princess."

Her tiny feet stamp about against the air at the sound of the voice, and Regina's heart doubles over at the sight of a lion tattoo that comes into view in front of her eyes, or well Rose's eyes. It's Robin, or half of Robin. Laying on his side, one hand extended out to brush the soft velvet of Regina's blue dress, the rest of his body saddled up tight and close to Rose as his free hand smoothes up and down her diapered bottom. And before she can see his face truly and full, the memory begins to fade out, leaving her with the smallest muffling of words from that same low timbered tone, "Good morning my love."

Pulling back from Rose's palm, Regina stares wide eyed at her daughter who looks at her with such an intensity it sends a flutter into Regina's stomach. Jesus words catch in her suddenly dry throat. Robin was there. She saw his tattoo. It has to be him. Sitting on her floor in the Enchanted Forest with Rose and who Regina can only assume she was hugging in the memory to be his son.

"Ba!"

Her eyes lock onto Rose, mouth agape and heart running a marathon pace. He was there. If this memory is real, he was there with her. Tears flood into her eyes as Rose flops herself down into Regina's chest, absently chewing on the grass bracelet on Regina's wrist. Running her hand across her daughters back, she tries her damn best to actually inhale a breath. To pull in any amount of oxygen into her screaming lungs. The room suddenly feels too small, enclosing in on her and she needs to move. Before her mind can go into a spiral, she has to get up and figure out what this all means.

Shifting Rose, who gurgles unhappily at the movement, she stands, runs a hand through her sweat dampened hair, and is stuck for what to actually do now. Does she run to Robin and tell him? What if he didn't believe her? She'd be making a fool of herself. Perhaps she just needs some fresh air. Something to help clear her mind, give her some peace and quiet to think about what, or rather who she just saw in her daughter's memory.

With a quick brush of her hair into a low pony, she pads down the hallway, palm pressing into the oak of Henry's door for a moment. She misses him still. Will forever. But maybe they can find him, bring him home where he belongs. Just another task to add to her growing list.

Settling onto the couch sofa, she stares out the window at the bright sun as Rose nurses quietly, happy to fill her tummy on morning breakfast. There is so much Regina needs to do. So much to figure out and accomplish. But she can't find the energy to even begin contemplating how to break this curse. Her thoughts drift to her son instead. Henry liked to go to the park. It's where he felt safe when the world was caving in on him. Maybe it's the answer to her panic right now. To go to the place where her son loved.

"Let's get you changed my girl. I think we need to go see Henry." She smiles down at Rose who is full and contently nuzzled into her neck. With a swirl of her magic, light lavender compared to the usual plum purple, she quickly swaps their pyjamas for more suitable clothing. She is in a pair of dark denim jeans and green sweater, Rose in a somewhat matching ensemble.

Checking herself once over in the mirror by the front door, Regina swings the door open, grabs Rose's baby bag and heads out into the sun, grateful for it's warmth that immediately hits her face. Perhaps the park is exactly what she needs.

.

..

…

..

.

It seems this was more of what Regina needed than her daughter. The air is warm, autumn slowly making it's presence known in the cooler air against the warm glow of sun. It makes her feel like she can breathe fully. A true breath. With this new found ability to inhale without resiliency she is able to let her thoughts wander as she watches the other children play in the park. A place she'd come with Henry when he was younger, just the two of them. No one else around them with prying eyes or threats to take him away from her. It was a much easier time back then. Before storybooks and the fear of her curse breaking. Easier, but perhaps not happier in reality.

She remembers feeling stifled amongst those who didn't even know who they were. Blank eyes that stared unknowingly at what she'd done. In all honesty, she figured once the curse hit and she'd "won", that things would be better. But it never felt like true happiness. Not until Henry. But now? Half of her heart is gone with him to New York. Half of it is here. With her daughter, who babbles happily amongst the daisies in the grass between her cradled spot of Regina's thighs.

Perhaps one day her heart will feel whole again.

For now, she is content to pick daisies with her daughter and watch the sparkle of blue eyes as the petite flowers twirl between her fingers. She's getting so big already. The rolls on her arms chubbier, matching the thicker ones on her thighs, melting into pudgy feet and tiny toes that pat joyfully in the grass. Her dimpled cheeks are full and tinged pink, a few tiny freckles dotted below her right eye. And while Regina knows that every parent thinks their child is the most beautiful, Rose is just another step above, at least in her eyes, her proud mother vibe out in full force at how enamoured everyone seems to be with her baby girl.

It makes her chuckle against the soft smattering of chocolate hair that perhaps in a few years, Regina is going to have quite the time fending off curious eyes and wandering hands of teenage boys. The thought makes her think of Daniel. How shy he'd been the first time he had "stumbled" rather foolishly and just ended up needed to hold her hand to steady himself, a hand he didn't exactly let go of for quite some time. Puppy love. That butterfly tornado of infatuation in her stomach every time he'd winked at her over Cora's shoulder. The crooked grin bitten back when she blushed at his whispered words of affection, gentle kisses to her cheek that made her feel higher than the sun.

Rose babbles as she reaches for another handful of grass, turning her eyes up to her mother to show her green mushed up prize. And just like every time before, the color of Rose's eyes steals Regina's breath for a moment. Daniel had a soft green hazel hue, perchance their children would have as well. But this sky blue, sapphire rimmed color that stares back up at her reminds her once again of another pair of near identical hues.

There is only one person that she's ever met to have that sparkle in their eyes like her daughter. And he is suddenly back in her life. Brushing back the fuzzy brown hair off of Rose's forehead, her fingers trace the lines of her daughters face. The slope of her nose, roundness of her cheeks, button chin below her plump pink pout. There is so much of Regina she see's in her, but there is also dare she say it out loud, so much of Robin she can also link into Rose's features. It makes everything just that much more confusing what with the magical memory she'd been shown this morning.

It crosses her mind that maybe she should talk to Robin about...well the possibility of it all being true. She can't imagine actually sitting down and saying the words though. It's not like she can exactly just blurt it out. It makes her chuckle at the face she'd assume he'd make. Jaw all agape, eyes in complete disbelief, and hopefully not horrified at the prospect. How could he not love Rose though? It seems he already has taken rather well to her daughter, and she to him. That picture of him holding her as Rose snuggled deeper into his chest will forever be burned into Regina's mind. It was natural, and maybe it was true.

Tomorrow. She will talk to him tomorrow about it. If she can find the nerve to do it. Maybe she will cook him and Roland dinner, make a roast and potatoes, something she knows he will most likely enjoy before she drops a potential bomb on him.

"Ba!"

Rose's fist flies into the air, and Regina's eyes follow to find Robin chasing after his adorable little bean of a boy towards the swingset. It's adorable, the half jog Robin gives chase with compared to the furious pedaling of Rolands tiny legs as he screams happily and flops onto a swing, belly first. She watches as Robin switches his boy around properly, ensuring his hands are glued to the chains as he gives him a light push, the beaming giggle erupted around the park as his little feet kick into the air.

Enraptured in the sight of Robin, and how wonderful a father he is, she is completely unaware of Rose setting out on her own adventure to the edge of the blanket, on all fours, crawling like her life depended on getting to that swingset.

"Hey. Where are you going?" Regina scoops up Rose around her belly, but her daughter lets out a pitiful wail, scowls up at her mother preventing her from moving. Two chubby hand plant against Regina's cheeks as Rose squirms and wriggles. "Okay okay. You can get down." She settles Rose back onto the blanket, and without hesitation she is off again. Stumbling her way on all fours back to the playground.

It's so damn cute the way her little legs push at silly angles, sliding her barely forward, but determined as ever. Perhaps a little time on the swings isn't such a bad idea. Sitting herself up, she crawls over to Rose, eyeing her daughter up curiously, "Would you like to go see them?" For a moment, it's almost as though Rose knows what she's being asked. Her eyes sparkle brighter than the sun before she buries her head into the ends of the blanket with a gurgle, and Regina takes that as a yes.

Scooping her baby girl up, she inhales a breath to hopefully settle her nerves and walks over to Robin and Roland. It's the young boy that notices her approach first. Squealing on the swings for his papa to stop. Robin does so immediately, thinking something is wrong, but Roland is half leaping off the swing before he can even ask, stampeding towards a beautiful pair slowly making their way towards them.

"Regina! Rosie!" Roland runs at full tilt, dimples deep in a smile as he thunders towards them, and thank god Regina had a little boy this age at one point as she kneels and braces herself for his impact, little as it may be.

He throws himself into her open single arm, hugs her tight and busses his face into her neck. "I knew you'd come!" She smiles through her confusion as he pulls back and nuzzles his nose against Rose's, who happily babbles in response. It feels strangely natural to be holding both of them, this little boy who she can't remember, but clearly they have some sort of past.

"Papa! Papa look! Regina is here! We were lucky!"

"I see that my boy!" Robin walks with his hands in his pockets, shyly smiling a half grin at Regina who arches a questioning eyebrow at him. "Seems luck was on our side after all." He ruffles Roland's hair as he sits down on the grass beside the threesome, not answering the curious look Regina gives him.

"Ba!" The tiny brunette babe erupts from Regina's arm, apparently aggravated she is being paid little attention currently.

"Well hello to you to little miss Rosie." Robin chuckles, tickling her belly. "Look at you in your matching outfits."

Regina fails to hide her blush at that. She didn't really mean to do it, well that's a lie. She did. Though it now seems a bit silly. "A little stunner just like your mother aren't you." His eyes flick to catch Regina's who immediately looks the other way, biting down on her lower lip to hide her smile. He'd always been somewhat of a flatterer with his words. But they shouldn't be making her stomach fly into a flurry of butterflies like they do.

"Regina, did you see me on the swings?"

"I did! You were going so high!"

"Yep! I could touch the sky."

"Almost like you were flying. Just like a bird."

"Or a dragon!"

She chuckles at that, "You'd be a fantastic dragon."

"But not like those monkeys." He frowns, "I didn't like them."

"What monkeys?"

"The ones that you saved me from. Two times!"

Regina feels Robin's eyes glue to her, as if waiting for her to remember when he can't. But the recollection isn't there. She's rather stunned in all honesty, but well what else can shock her. She's woken up nearly a month ago with a new daughter, a long lost….friend back in her life and his son who apparently knows her. There has been a lot Regina has lived through. This is just another obstacle to overcome, figuring out this curse so they can get their memories back.

"Can you tell me about them Roland?"

"The Monkeys?"

"Yeah. What did they look like?"

Roland settles down beside her, well inside her parted thighs really, as close as he can. "They were really big and scary. And they made a really scary noise in the sky."

"They don't seem very nice."

"No. And they hurt you and daddy real bad one time."

Robin's hand moves to his side where the scars are. They still tingle.

"But you saved him with your magic."

Her eyes flick to Robin's, down to where his hand rests on his ribs. Sensing her impending question, he simply nods silently, shrugs his shoulders and gives her a small smile.

"I was scared." Roland's voice wavers a touch. Enough that it has Regina's hand scooping him up tighter into her chest, pressing a kiss to his head. It seems silly, or perhaps like she is crossing a line giving this boy affection when she still doesn't even remember who he is. But it's just natural, and Robin doesn't seem to mind in the slightest. Even smiles brighter if possible at the sight.

"I bet you were my boy. But Regina is really good with her magic. She saved me once before you know."

"She did?"

"Yep. Sheriff Nottingham got me one time."

"No way!"

Robin's hand flies to his heart, the other in the sky. "Scouts honour."

"Stinky ol' sheriff."

"Too right you are, my boy."

"But Regina saved you?"

"Aye." His eyes move to catch hers, "Fixed me up fit as a fiddle." He smiles at her, and she returns it this time.

It's strange to hear him talk about her this way. In such happy reverence about their past. Playing her up as some sort of hero. It's the first time she honestly feels as though everything may be truly in the past. At least with them. He hasn't made even the slightest indication that he wants to talk about it either. Seems content enough to let it be.

"Regina?" Roland questions from underneath her. "How come you and Papa don't remember anything?"

Chewing on her bottom lip she sits Rose down between her legs, and shrugs her shoulders at the question. "Honestly, I'm not sure. It's a memory curse that I am not sure how to break."

"Could you try? I miss playing in your room and going to rides on your horse."

He looks so bloody sad that it tears her up inside. She wants to remember so terribly. Wants to have the chance to know what happened, and who things happened with. "Well. We can still do all those things."

"We can?"

Her eyes flick up to Robin's who is sitting there watching her with an expression she can't quite place. Some sort of longing in his eyes that ties and tethers around her heart. "If your dad says it's okay, then maybe tonight we can make lasagna and cupcakes at my house. And then you can tell me more stories you remember. Would that be okay?"

The speed at which Roland spins around on his knees and flies over to Robin, little hands pressed against his father's cheeks, demanding his eyes look right at him is adorable. The utter determination mixed in with a dose of puppy eyes. How Robin would be able to say no, Regina has little clue, and apparently brown button pouting eyes are exactly his kryptonite.

"I think that would be quite alright." Robin smiles at his boy, who whoops and hollers into the air. "As long as you're sure we wouldn't be imposing?" He looks at Regina. "Don't be ridiculous, you are never an imposition." She returns his smile and lets her eyes drop to Rose, lest Robin see the sheer radiating happiness exuding out of her very soul that he would want to spend an evening with her.

"Ba!" Rose's hands fly out towards Robin's, and before Regina can stop her, she is on all fours and tummy again, wriggling her way towards him. It makes her chuckle, seeing the pure conviction in her daughter's eyes as she slides towards Robin who reaches his hands out to scoop her up. "Well hello little Rosie." He coos at her, sitting her chubby bottom on his thighs, hands securing under her arms and around her back. "You sure are a stunner aren't you. Just like your mother."

A pink puff blooms out of Rose's hands that rest on Robin's chest, and Regina watches half in awe at her daughter's magic, half in shock she is about to show him a memory. She only wonders which it is going to be. And more-so what his reaction to it is going to be. His eyes fade out as the memory takes over, a slight crease in his brow that has Regina's nerves firing.

He lets the picture fade into view. A grassy hill with warm sun shining down against a beautiful lake down the hillside. He know's this lake. Remembers the very first time he saw Regina there, crying quietly all alone. He'd fallen in love with her right then and there, on the shoreline of this very lake. But the sight is different now. He can see Roland running in the lavender flowers. What he didn't expect was to see Regina chasing him. Dressed up in soft brown pants, a white cotton blouse and her hair loosely braided down her back. But it's not her attire that makes his heart swell, but the laughter that erupts from both she and his son as she catches his and swings him up into the sky, nuzzling their noses together on the way down before she turns, carrying him on her hip and settling down on the blanket. It takes him a moment, but he realizes that this entire scene is through Rosie's point of view. A view that has Robin's own arms encircling her tiny belly and hoisting her up onto his thighs for a cuddle.

"Daddy did you see how fast I was going?"

"I did my boy! Faster than a bear!"

Roland rolls over into a laugh, bumping his body into Regina's legs as she too chuckles. He watches through Rosie's eyes as Regina leans over top of her, pressing a quick kiss to her forehead before leaning up further to do the exact same thing to Robin himself, though it's not his forehead but his lips she affections.

Regina sits back down, running her fingertips over Rose's cheeks, admiring the little girl with such love it nearly send's Robin's heart into overdrive. He can feel it. What Rosie feels as Regina bops their noses together, the pure adoration, the devotion towards her daughter. It's overwhelming.

"Sometimes I can't believe she is ours."

The memory fades, but that last word rings in Robin's ears as he comes back into present time. His heart thundering in his chest as he stares down at Rose, her eyes bright blue and sparkling inquisitively back at him. She is his. This perfect little girl is his daughter. His and Regina's baby girl.

"Robin?"

Tears flush into his eyes as he looks up at Regina who looks terrified sitting across from him. And all he can do is let the bubbling in his heart erupt out into a beaming smile as a single tear falls.

"She's ours."

TBC. 


	25. Chapter 25

"She's ours."

Regina stares at Robin and the words he just let out. He saw something. Maybe it was the same memory Rose had shown her earlier that morning.

Robin pants rather heavily as he adjusts Rose in his arms, the little girl holding his gaze with such an intensity it has his stomach rolling. She has his eyes. Not some other man's. But _his_. That bright sapphire blue they match his own eyes. His dimples are set deep in her chubby pink cheeks. She is half of him. His daughter. With Regina.

Jesus Christ. He knew something felt different this time around, and yes he had hope, but the reality crashes over him like a cold bucket of river water. He has a baby girl. Dear God, he's a father again.

"Regina?" His eyes break from Rose who snuggles into his chest happily, and fly up to the little girl's mother. She is staring at them. Wide eyed and looking almost terrified. "Did you know?"

She swallows thickly and nods, slowly.

"When?"

"This morning."

"Do you think it's real?"

Well in all honesty, it's a good question because no, she isn't positive, but how else would Rose be able to show her Robin or Roland? So it has to be true. Which makes her heart double over. If she trusts it, this gut feeling she's had since the moment she saw Robin at the townhall meeting, then in the truest part of her heart she doesn't need Rose's memories to tell her what she already knows.

Robin is Rose's father.

Which also means that she and Robin... were together in the Enchanted Forest. Which is a whole other topic to tackle. It's odd. Not having the memories but the product of what happened. Clearly, they patched things up and he forgave her... and then, well, Rose is here so obviously they... he... well, she knows she loved him once and it wouldn't have been hard to fall for him again. It's a shred of disbelief that runs through her that it's possible he loved her as well.

Or maybe getting pregnant was just an accident.

Not likely, given her whole infertility potion she once took. How that broke or loopholed around to have her get pregnant is strange and concerning. But what does that really matter. She has a beautiful baby girl.

"I don't know how she would have those memories if it weren't." Regina sighs, and tucks her hair behind her ears as she waits for Robin's reply. Perhaps he's angry with her for not telling him the exact moment she found out. Maybe he doesn't want to have a child with her. That could explain his stunned expression.

"So she is my daughter?"

"Yes."

"Our daughter?"

"Unless I kidnapped a baby that looks like the spitting image of the two of us… she is ours."

Robin beams and Regina's heart stumbles over itself.

He's happy about it.

Actually happy.

Tears flush into her eyes as the reality truly sets in. She has a daughter with Robin. And she damn near lets them fall when she sees his own gaze blur as he sniffs looking down at Rose still nuzzled into his chest.

"I can't believe I have a daughter."

"Imagine waking up to it." She laughs breathlessly as Robin too matches her with a chuckle and bounce of his eyebrows.

"That must have been quite, jarring?"

"It passed rather quickly."

"How could it not? She's perfect." He thumbs over the dark chocolate fluff of hair on top of Rosie's head, leaning down to inhale her baby sweet scent deeply as though he's breathing for the first time.

"Not at three am, wailing incessantly, she isn't."

Robin grins and buries his nose into Rose's head, "Don't listen my precious girl, you are absolute perfection at all hours."

Regina's eyes roll, but she smiles. He's wrapped around her finger already. A doting dad to the core. Regina snorts a laugh, "Yes, well, you can get up with her, see just how _perfect_ she is then."

He stills for a moment and looks back at Regina. Him being allowed to get up with their daughter means that he would be sleeping in the same house as them. Together. With Regina. If his heart hadn't swelled enough already, he thinks that extra added musing she just gave him may have it popping at the seams.

In his arms, Rosie babbles something, pats his chest and bumps her forehead into his chest. She is so tiny. Such a little human being with ten beautiful tiny fingers and toes. And as he settles her on his knees, he takes a true look at her. She does look like him. In minor slight ways. The majority of her features are certainly Regina, not that Robin is complaining, but to see this baby girl is a combination of the two of them. It's rather overwhelming. To the point where tears flush into his eyes as he beams at his daughter.

"You know, my grandmother's name was Rosalie."

Regina's eyebrow arches curiously. "You think we named her after your grandmother?"

"Perhaps?"

"It is a beautiful name."

"Mmmm for the most beautiful girl." He grins as Rosie smacks her tiny palms into his cheeks, scratching the stubble underneath with a ferocious look. He's seen that look on Regina before. When she is consumed with figuring something out. It's a crease in her brow, narrowing of her eyes. "How old do you think she is?"

Regina takes a minute, smiling at the sight before her, unbelieving of how well Robin is taking the entire bomb that's been dropped on him. "Honestly, I don't know. Best guess would be maybe seven or eight months?"

She sees his face fall momentarily, "I've missed so much already."

"You're here now."

Their eyes meet over Rosie's head, and Regina's stomach swirls about when Robin smiles and nods. "And I will not lose another minute." He presses a kiss to their daughter's forehead though his gaze remains on Regina, "With either of you."

She can't help the smile that erupts rather bashfully into her blush tinted cheeks.

They sit together on the blanket for a while, trading glances towards one another every now and then as Roland runs about the playground, oblivious to their new family situation. Robin completely enamoured with Rosie as she grabs fists full of grass blades, holding it up to him for inspection. He asks all sorts of questions about her. Is she a good sleeper? Most of the time. Is she crawling yet? To a degree, it's more of a wiggle still. What soothes her? The rocking chair he built. That has a grin being bitten back.

He comments quietly about his excitement over getting to see her grow up. To be there to rock her to sleep, give her a bath, teach her to walk, figure out what will make her smile and laugh. There had been a point in time where he never imagined himself having more children after Marian had passed, but in the back of his mind he always wondered about how it would be raising a girl.

That has Regina chuckling, because clearly he's already wrapped around their baby girl's finger. And if she isn't careful, Rose will have both her parents eating out of the palm of her hand in no time. Which brings up another question. Roland.

Who is still frantically racing up and down the slide in the park, between the swings and over the monkey bars. He is adorable. And clearly is quite taken with Regina as he skips up beside her, presenting a handful of daisies she accepts with a smile before he sits himself down between her legs.

"I missed you, Regina."

Her hands wrap around his little belly as she nuzzles into the mop of curly brown hair. It's so easy for her to love children. They are her absolute weakness. And Roland is no exception. Even if she doesn't remember him. It feels natural to cradle him into her chest.

"Do you remember me now?"

Her eyes flick to Robin's sadly, and she feels Roland deflate at her lack of answer. "I'm sorry, Roland. But if it's okay with you and your daddy, I was thinking maybe we could make new memories."

"Like what?"

"Well, what's your favorite dessert?"

"Chocolate cakes!"

"How about we make some tonight at my house then?"

"Really?!" He flies around on his knees, squaring them chest to chest and the look he gives her, one of absolute hope and awe, would knock her off her feet if she weren't already sitting. Nodding, she bumps their noses together and Roland giggles, "Eskimo kisses!" He wiggles his own button nose across her a few more times. "Can we have lasagna too? You made the best kind!"

Well, it appears she's already played her hand in the cooking department. She just wishes she could remember it. "Of course, but you have to ask your dad."

"Please daddy! Can we have cake and lasagna with Regina and Rosie?"

From across the blanket Robin is smiling as though he's just seeing color for the first time. "That sounds like a wonderful idea, my boy."

Something in Regina's chest bursts at the smile Robin sends her way. Waking up three weeks ago with a baby girl had been, well, a shock to say the least, but as the pieces are slowly being put back together the full picture is coming more and more into plain sight.

They are a family.

.

..

…

..

.

It didn't take long for Rosie to fall asleep in Robin's arms at the park. All warm and nestled against his chest. Regina had been loathe to pull her daughter out of her slumber for a moment, fastening her into the carseat before she dozed off once more. Robin had stood with Roland by her vehicle, bidding them both a short farewell, telling her they'd be at her house in a few hours and when Robin leaned in to kiss her cheek, Regina's blushed ridiculously red.

The entire drive home, she can't wipe off the silly grin on her lips, nor does the feeling of floating away cease as she turns down the streets and heads home. Eyeing up her left hand on the steering wheel, a particular finger is vacant, and she wonders if they are married. It's not something she truly ever wanted to happen again. But if this situation has taught her anything, it's that the impossible can always happen, if the right person is there.

She bathes Rose first. Getting more soap and suds on herself than anywhere else as her daughter playfully splashes about in the tub, a yellow rubber duck squeaking in her tiny fists. Washed off, dried and lotioned up, she dresses Rose in a navy blue dress, with white trim around the hem and neck, a matching headband bow slid into the soft dark brown crown of hair. She even finishes off the ensemble with a pair of white booties before settling Rose in her bouncy chair as Regina takes a quick shower herself, pulling on a pair of dark denims and a white silk blouse that ties around her waist. A fast application of light makeup, she scoops up her daughter, and heads downstairs and into the kitchen.

The doorbell rings and Rose immediately squeals in her highchair. Her blue eyes sparkling as Regina lifts her and attempts to settle her down on her hip as they make way towards the door, a chorus of happy bubbled "Ba!"'s chirping into the air. Swinging the door open, it's to a bouquet of flowers. A flurry of autumn colours, red roses, orange carnations, yellow lilies and a few white baby's breath to tie it all in together. She takes them with a smile, finding Roland's chubby cheeks behind them, bashful and god damn adorable as she thanks him fondly.

"It was Papa's idea."

"Was it now?"

Her brow cocks up to Robin who's made himself rather busy staring up at the clouds, but she can see the blush behind the grin he bites back. Turning back to his son, she wraps a hand around his ear and leans in to whisper something. It has Robin's eyes flicking down curiously as Roland giggles and nods when Regina presses a quick kiss to his forehead.

Regina stands, and Rose immediately reaches for Robin who takes her gladly. "What are you two whispering about?" He scowls playfully, adjusting his daughter in her arms, "It's not nice to keep secrets."

Roland hums, gives Regina a giddy look before turning his chin up to Robin. "You're right Papa, I have to give you something from Regina." Robin kneels, and Regina's heart skips a beat seeing the three of them all tucked in together. She's just missing one person to make this perfect. Robin leans in as Roland goes to whisper in his ear, but his cheek is met with a wet kiss instead and a rather fierce hug from his boy. Chuckling he scoops him up, holding both his babies as he turns back at Regina smiling like a complete fool.

It's infectious. His smile. It creeps up Regina's spine and lingers on her lips as he bows his head and thanks her. They walk into the house together, Roland escaping from his father's arms and stampede's towards Regina, linking their hands together as the enter the kitchen.

For much of the evening, Regina is caught between complete disbelief and sheer joy. Never did she think she could have this feeling again after leaving Henry. Though her heart still aches at the thought of him, being here with Robin, his son and their daughter has managed to placate the pain. At least for now.

Robin settles on a chair, Rose in his lap, squishing her hands into his face and tugging at the buttons of his pine green shirt. He looks fantastic in green. It brings out the bright blue of his eyes. The tailoring of it enhancing the muscle tone beneath. More than once she spies his tattoo, the one he'd shown her all those years ago. It suits him. A magnificent lion. Strength and protection. It's Robin to a T. Those exact qualities exude from him and he is perhaps one of the only people in this world she genuinely feels safe with.

For much of the evening, Roland is knee deep in cake batter and pasta sauce, sweetly demanding he take part in every step of making their dinner. It's adorable, and it has Robin's heart swelling beyond the confines of his chest as he watches the two of them giggle over chocolate icing, which is more on Roland's face than the cake itself. He finds himself enamoured by her. Everything she does, the smile she gives his son when he dabs her nose with pasta sauce, the softness of her laugh as she wipes it away. Occasionally her eyes flick up to find his, and he flushes at being caught staring rather openly at her.

It's once both cake and dinner are bubbling away in the oven that she finally sits down beside him, close enough he can smell the basil that's lingering in her hair when she leans over to press a kiss to Rose's cheek. And for a little girl who usually doesn't stop moving and babbling, Rose is rather quiet and content where she is. Nuzzled against Robin's chest, his thumb gripped tightly in her tiny fist.

Without really thinking, his free hand slides around Regina's chair, and trails lightly down her back. She stills for a moment, catches Robin's eyes and smiles far too shyly for a woman once known as the Evil Queen. But that's not who she is to him. Never has been. She presses further into his touch, her shoulder leaning into his own as his hand continues it's path up and down her spine, scratching lightly at the base of her skull every now and then. The buzzer goes off far too quickly for his liking, and he visible scowls as Regina retracts herself from his side, chuckling at his frown, and before she can really talk herself out of it, she kisses his cheek.

It stuns them both as she pulls back wide eyed. For a moment they stare at one another, a breath of space between them filled with a hundred questions. Robin's heart thunders in his chest, thrums into the high heavens as he brushes back a lock of hair behind her ear and cups her cheek gently. He tips his chin down, enough that his nose bumps against her own, enough that he can feel the warmth of her breath against his lips.

"Regina! The cake is done!"

It breaks the moment, and Robin sighs with a smile as Regina shakes the fuzz in her brain out, and bites down on her lip bashfully. His heart follows on two wobbly legs as she stands and leaves him with a squeeze to his forearm.

Dinner after that is filled with side glances and shy smiles between them. Roland obliviously happy as he wolfs down his dinner and chatters about silly nonsense in his day. Beneath the table, Robin's hand finds Regina's. And he's quite content to simply sit here, food long finished and hold her hand. It appears, dare he say it, that she too enjoys this. Her thumb swiping soft lines on his palm as she listens ever so intently to Roland's regaling stories of the Enchanted Forest.

He wonders for a moment as his fingers trail along her knuckles, rubbing circles over a particular finger on her left hand, one that is vacant of a diamond, if they are married. He can imagine it. Her in a white dress walking through the tree's towards him. Perhaps at the lake they first met. At sundown most definitely. The way the dimming glow would illuminate the gold colour of her eyes before he kissed her, kissed his wife.

If it did happen, he knows it would have been perfect.

Before long, they are sitting in the living room, dinner left on the counter tops, and Roland curled up in Regina's lap as she reads him a story. His eyes closed before she's even reached the fifth page. She curls her fingers through his unruly wild hair, humming softly as he sleeps soundly against her body, which is fortunately leaning against Robin's chest. The four of them tucked in together on the sofa. If it wasn't for Rose's small whine that escaped as she stretches out in Robin's arm, Regina feels as though she could have stayed just like this forever. With Robin's fingers petting long lines down her arm, the steady beat of his heart against her back. If only she could freeze time.

Rose whimpers again and Regina sighs, turning to find her daughter on the brink of a hungry meltdown. "I should feed her."

Robin nods, "And I should be getting him back to camp."

Regina frowns, wraps her arm tighter around the sleeping boy. She's not ready to let them leave. Isn't sure she ever wants them too again. "There is a spare room upstairs he can sleep in." She feels Robin smile more than she can actually see it. They trade children, and she moves to sit in the single arm chair, wrapping a blanket around her legs as she settles Rose against her breast, listening to the quiet footsteps Robin takes up the stairs.

A sigh leaves her as Rose latches onto her breast, suckling greedily as Regina begins to rock them back and forth gently. She's growing so quickly, it won't be long before it's onto solid foods and Regina will have to relinquish these intimate moments with her daughter.

Robin treads softly back down the stairs, only to have his heart leap from his chest and waddle over to Regina who's currently breastfeeding their daughter on the single dark grey arm chair. He feels it, how his heart climbs up her legs and settles into a warm steady thrumming beat on Rosie's chest as she fills her tummy with dinner. He's fairly certain he's never seen something so perfect as this moment here and now.

Tiny white socked feet wiggling in the air, Regina's eyes half lidded as she smiles something gorgeous down at their daughter, stroking over the light crown of black hair there. She's mumbling something soft and sweet as they rock gently back and forth. It's a quiet peaceful moment he doesn't wish to intrude on. He tip toes towards the kitchen, deciding on that Regina could use a cup of tea.

"Hey. Where are you going?" Her voice stops him mid stride and he grins shyly "I was going to get you a tea." She smiles with a tip of her head, but shakes her head and motions him over towards her and Rosie. He goes far too quickly with very little hesitation. Giddy almost as he slowly settles down on the arm of the chair. With a kiss to the crown of Regina's hair, Robin's eyes linger on their daughter, half asleep as she suckles quietly. "She's beautiful."

"Yeah she is. Sometimes I still don't believe this is all real."

"I know what you mean. But I am thankful for it."

She smiles, turns her face up to meet his eyes, and her heart stumbles over itself at the look he is giving her. One that is full of possibility and if she dare think it, love. She feels it. The way he wraps an arm around her shoulders, twirling a few strands of her hair in his fingers, and dips his chin down so his forehead can rest against hers. "And if this is a dream, I pray I never wake up."

Regina chuckles, and leans harder into him, "That was corny." Her nose nuzzles against the line of his jaw, "I agree with you though." Her lips find the corner of his mouth, resting softly against his stubble as he shifts into her.

"I know there are so many thing we need to talk about, things we don't yet know." He whispers against her cheek, "But I've already missed so much with you, with our daughter." He lands a barely there kiss to her smile, "I refuse to let this chance go."

"Are you sure?" Her heart hammers in her chest as she blinks up at him, scanning his face for answers, for the possibility he honestly wants this with her. To be with her. To be a family together.

"I've wanted nothing more since they day I saw you crying by the lake."

Tears flush her eyes, a single one escaping as she nearly whimpers in relief, his thumb quick to wipe it away. "I just need to know if you want the same thing?" Beneath them, Rose gurgles and stretches out in Regina's arms before nuzzling into her mother's chest and falling asleep. "I think I made that decision a long time ago."

Robin beams, and he captures her lips before his heart decides to burst free.

It's slow. Languid and soft as she presses harder into him, humming at the taste of his mouth, the stubble that scratches lightly on her chin. It feels like home. Where she's always meant to have been. His teeth nip at her lower lip, sucking it into his mouth with a groan, and heat pools deep in her stomach.

She could spend her entire life here. Kissing him. Feeling his heart beat heavy and hard against her palm resting on his chest. His fingers card through her hair, tugging her closer to him if possible, holding her lips to his own as he soaks in their plump softness, the slight indent on her top lip where her scar lays. He loves that scar. Lets his tongue dart out to sample along the line of it. It has Regina moaning in the back of her throat, pressing harder, opening her mouth to him, swallowing down the taste of whiskey on his tongue that maps her own.

"Mom?"

They break apart with a pop. Regina's head turning towards the front door, jaw agape at the voice she just heard.

"Henry?"

TBC.


	26. Chapter 26

**Tethered To You 26**

"Henry?"

Her heart stops. Braces itself against her chest as it gapes at her son. Her baby boy standing there smiling up at her from the doorway.

"Mom!"

He races over, wet muddy boots and all on her carpet, and it doesn't even cross her mind when his arms around wrapped tightly around her, his head buried into her chest. It's him. All of him snuggled into her. And she'd think maybe she had one too many  
glasses of wine with Robin, but her merlot remains relatively untouched.

"I missed you."

Henry burrows into her chest, holding her impossibly tight as she too wraps her arms around him, cupping the back of his head and presses a wet tear filled kiss into the crown of his head. He smells like soft warm cotton, like he always has. Summer fresh  
wind in the midst of cold winter snow's. Her voice croaks out, weak and disbelieving as it is, that she missed him too. Missed him more than her son will ever understand. More than she will ever be able to explain.

Leaning back, she's graced with his smile. The one's she only dreamed about seeing again. All bright and hopeful, cheerfully grinning up at her in the way only Henry can. It has her heart stumbling over itself at the sight of his green hazel eyes. He's  
here. He's home.

Running her hands through his hair, her lips meet his forehead, soft and gentle as he leans into it. Soaks it all in, and hugs her even tighter. "It's good to be home."

The statement has her brow furrowing. Not that she isn't absolutely over the moon her prince is home, but he shouldn't be here, he shouldn't remember her. Sniffing back her tears, she tips his head up, cupping his chin as she finally gets to look into  
those perfect hazel brown eyes she's missed so damn much. And it appears Henry is already aware of what her question is.

"Emma and I drank a memory potion."

"Who gave it to you?" Regina quirks her brow high.

"Hook did. We thought you guys sent him?"

Well...that never happened...Hook rode off day two they were in the enchanted forest on a ridiculous quest to get Emma back, how Regina wasn't sure, but he was adamant about it. They hadn't heard anything from him since that day.

"We didn't, but I'm so happy he found you."

Henry beams and buries himself back into Regina's arms. "Me too mom. I missed you a lot." A statement that sweet in theory isn't actually possible. She took his memories and altered them, replacing her with Emma for his entire life. He wouldn't have even  
known who she was for the past two years. A notion that has a lump forming in her throat she desperately tries to swallow back down. It doesn't matter now, he is home, back where he belongs.

"Where is Emma?"

"At Grandma's. She said I could spend the night here."

At least the saviour had some sense, Regina muses, smiling into the crown of Henry's hair. He's gotten so much taller. She can barely tuck his head underneath her chin anymore. So much time she's missed. And silently she vows to never let them be parted  
again. Come hell or high waters, Regina is stop the entire world from spinning if it means keeping her baby boy with her. And speaking of babies, Regina turns as she feels Robin step beside her, with Rose in tow.

She has another child. Something she never thought would happen, and for a moment, she feels a sense of dread wash over her as to how Henry is going to react. Praying that he doesn't think she replaced him, Regina presses a hard kiss to his hair once  
more, and then turns them both to face Robin.

She feels Henry stiffen at the sight of Robin and Rose. "Uh Hello?"

Robin smiles, and extends a hand, "Hi Henry, it's nice to finally meet you." For a moment Henry hesitates before shaking Robin's hand, and Regina tries to not think too much about the dark look that momentarily passed through her son's eyes. She will  
have to talk to him later about all of this going on. But for right now, this is good, having her son home with her, Robin and Rose beside her and another sleepy little boy upstairs. All the pieces of the puzzle are slowly coming together.

Holding onto her son, Regina settles down onto the couch beside him, combing through his hair as he stares at Rose. It must be jarring seeing all of this. But they haven't been properly introduced which hopefully will ease the tension that so clearly  
sits in Henry's shoulders. Picking Rose up from Robin's arms, she turns the baby girl who is staring up at Henry with wide eyes, not making a peep which is rather uncharacteristic.

"This is Rose." Regina smiles at her daughter, "She's your sister."

Henry frowns for a moment before flicking his eyes not to Regina, but over to Robin. "Who are you?" It's a bit rougher than Regina expected, but Robin takes it like a champion, smiling and leaning in.

"Robin of Locksley at your service. Your mother has told me a lot about you."

"Robin Locksley as in Robin Hood the thief?"

Regina stiffens at her son's laced tone. It's not like Henry to not be over the moon about meeting another person from the Enchanted Forest. Perhaps he is just tired and it is all overwhelming to be home, see her, meet his sister, and the man who … well  
Regina doesn't know what she and Robin are yet.

Chuckling Robin nods, "In my days yes I was a thief."

"Are you and my mom together?"

Blush floods Regina's cheeks, and she avoids Robin's uncertain clearing of his throat, opting to tickle into Rose's tummy. She's learning to smile, a gummy adorable pudgy cheeked thing.

"We are old friends." Robin ends up answering with, and Henry apparently isn't buying it. He can obviously see the similarities between Rose and Robin, he's not aloof by any means. "Are you her father?"

"I am."

Henry hums, frowns and turns back to Regina and Rose. "But you aren't together?"

"It's complicated Henry." Regina supplies, hoping to qualm the tension billowing in her living room. This isn't exactly how she thought this would all go. "We lost our memories of the past two years. Robin and I knew each other a long time ago, when I  
was the Queen. We apparently reconnected."

"Yeah I got that." Henry snaps, which is far too harsh for Regina's liking. She is still his mother and she will not tolerate that tone.

Reaching for his hand, she tries not to cringe at the way Henry momentarily flinches from her touch. "I know this is all strange and a bit jarring, but Robin is a good man, you don't have to worry."

Her boy softens at that, shakes his head and grins up at her. "I just worry about you mom."

"I know, but it's okay. This is one thing you don't have to worry about."

"Are you getting married?"

Robin stifles a choke at the question but stares at Regina for her answer none the less though she doesn't look back at him, not quite ready to venture into that territory just yet, even if they were lip locked only a few minutes ago. "We are figuring  
things out as we go."

"What does that mean?"

Goodness, he always had a thousand and one questions didn't he. "In all honesty, we sort of just figured out that Robin is Rose's father. She has magic and was showing us memories of the missing year."

"Years."

"What?"

"You were gone for two years mom."

Regina shrinks, she knows how long it's been. "I'm sorry Henry. I'm sorry it took me so long to get back to you."

He huffs a breath, and leans into Rose, "So I have a sister." His clear avoidance of the topic hits a sore spot in Regina's heart. She feels the guilt bubble inside her. They just need some time to explain everything that happened...once they know what  
happened.

"You do. She's a lot like you as a baby."

"Yeah?"

"Curious, absolutely brilliant." Regina smiles proudly, "Everyone adores her already."

They fall into a bit of small talk, more so over Henry's time in New York. He's going well in school, likes math, has a couple friends and even started playing soccer at school. Over the course of the night she see's him start to relax, almost like a  
wave passing over him as he even starts asking Robin questions about being an outlaw, if he can teach him to shoot a bow and arrow, and even if they can go camping sometime. Thankfully, Robin hadn't taken Henry's initial cold disposition to heart  
and engages smoothly in their conversation, promising he will do all of those things, if Regina says yes of course.

It's even gotten as comfortable as Henry asks to hold Rose, bouncing her happily on his lap as she pops spit bubbles in his face. Regina's breath becomes lighter seeing them together, brother and sister, content and calm with one another. Seems the storm  
has passed and the ease is settling in. At some point Robin had moved to the floor beside Regina's legs, half leaning against her thighs as he smiles quietly at the scene in front of them. Henry is a great kid. Regina raised him well. He just wishes  
he knew more about their life. Perhaps though, he is going to get that chance. They are going to get the chance to be a family. Something he never thought would happen.

When Rose finally falls asleep against Regina's chest, Henry yawns and snuggles into her side as well. She looks peaceful he realizes. A feature he's yet to see on her over the past months. "I should take Roland back to camp."

"You don't have too."

Robin's heart stumbles. "You sure? Henry's back and I understand if you want some alone time with him."

Regina smiles, finds his fingers and squeezes them gratefully. "I'm sure. There is a guest room you can stay in." He knows he shouldn't be disappointed, not getting to sleep beside Regina, but this is all new, or at least right now it is. Regardless of  
the fact that they have a daughter together, which clearly means at some point they were rather intimate, he knows they need time to figure everything out again. He's willing to wait. He's waited forever, a few more weeks won't kill him, at least  
he doesn't think.

"Why don't I put Rose to sleep upstairs and you take Henry? I'm sure he'd like his mother to tuck him in again."

Tears prickle her eyes at the mere thought as she nods in agreement. Slowly not to wake their daughter, Robin slides her from Regina arms, nestles her softly into his own and presses a kiss to Regina's forehead, bidding her goodnight. She watches them  
go, father and daughter up the stairs and to Rose's room.

"Henry?" She wiggles a bit, running her hands through his hair. "Honey let's get you up to bed." Beneath her, he grumbles, arches and cracks as they sit up together, Henry rubbing his eyes sleepily as he grins at her, "You gonna tuck me in?"

"Of course. Let's go."

His room hadn't changed with the curse, everything in it's proper place exactly as he left it. He hops into bed, Regina changing his clothes with magic, and she settles beside him, tucking the blanket up over his shoulders and pressing a kiss to his cheek.  
"I'm so happy you are here. I missed you more than you will ever know."

For a moment Henry's eyes fall from her's. "I thought when I saw Rose and Robin that maybe you forgot about me."

"Oh Henry." Her heart breaks and she lays down beside him, "I could never and will never ever replace you. I love you with all of my heart. You're my everything."

He smiles, snuggles into her chest like he did when he was younger, playing with the ends of her hair. She missed this. Having these quiet moments with her son. Everything was simpler when he was a toddler. Before saviours and curses came to rip it all  
apart. It's getting better.

"I love you mom."

"I love you too my prince."

She leaves him with one last kiss to his forehead, promises they can make waffles in the morning and closes the door behind her. The tears fall before she can catch them. Happy tears of relief. Her son is home. She has a family, granted one she doesn't  
really remember creating, but still, it's nearly perfect.

What's not perfect is her bed being empty when she walks in. It seems cold and lonely. With all the silk pillows lined up perfectly along the headboard. When she told Robin there was a spare room, what she didn't realize was that she didn't really want  
him in there. Even if they aren't sure what they are to each other just yet, she knows in her heart she does love him, always had and having him here, well it just seems like a loss in her books.

Slipping into her silk pyjamas, she tries to not think to much about how short the shorts are, or how she isn't exactly wearing a bra as she grabs her pillow and quietly pads towards the guest room. Stalling outside the door, those little voices in her  
head, rear their ugly heads, whispering that maybe Robin doesn't want her in his room, she's pushing her luck going in there, it will only lead to disappointment. She huffs a breath, runs a hand through her hair, and closes her eyes in a feeble attempt  
to gain some courage. They have a daughter together. Clearly they've already slept in the same bed at some point recently.

She's so consumed in her own head that she doesn't see the door pop open, doesn't register Robin in front of her until his hands find her waist. She jilts, stares up at him like a deer caught in headlights. Thankfully he doesn't comment on the fact she's  
just standing outside his door in her sleepwear, he just grins, and turns to open the door a bit more. Trying to hide her blush, she dips past him and sits on the bed. Her heart flutters when he too sits down beside her, shoulder to shoulder, his  
bare chest all exposed for her view pleasure.

She burns when Robin smiles bashfully at her, lacing their fingers together and pressing a soft kiss to the back of her palm. It's not the time to venture further into more intimate territory, they both know that, but being together, even if they don't  
remember it all, it's easier than Regina anticipated it would be. Slowly, Robin lays back on the bed, pulling Regina with him smoothly as she gives no real resistance, she was just standing outside his door after all. Curling into his side, her head  
rests on his chest, fingers play with the spattering of blonde hair she finds there, his warmth hugging her like a blanket. He too finds things to touch, the soft skin behind her jaw, a lock of hair on her shoulders, the expanse of her back down to  
the dip of her spine and back up again. It's natural and Regina swallows back against the lump in her throat that she actually gets to have this. A family. A person who quite possibly enjoys her company enough to have made a baby together. They are  
tethered to each other. She knows Robin's realized her tears when his hand suddenly stops combing through her hair and he slides down enough so that they are nose to nose.

Thumbing away a tear, he frowns, tips her chin up only to find more tears along her lashes. "What tis it?"

Regina shakes head, not wanting to open the flood gates, she just dips down into the crook of his neck, anchors her arms around his back and inhales heavy. He doesn't pry, he never did. Just does what he always did in their years that seem so long ago.  
He waits. Strokes down her back, up to the base of her skull, thumbs there for a while, trying to release whatever tension plagues her, and says nothing. It makes her feel like they are eighteen again. Hiding from the King she hated with every fiber  
of her being, holding onto Robin like a lifeline.

She muffles it into his neck, a whispered soft, "I just never thought I'd have this.", and wiggles into him further. His breath is warm against her brow when he tucks his chin down, presses a kiss to her forehead and quietly confesses back, "Either did  
I." He's so safe. She feels so safe with him. "Regina I know this is all rather odd right now, but I want you to know how grateful I am to have you and Rose and now Henry."

Chuckling wetly, Regina nods, slides her head out of the nook of his neck and pillow and runs her palm over the stubble on his cheek. "I'm afraid of what happens when the curse breaks."

"Why?"

Stifling down her nerves, she shrugs, lines her eyes with his lips instead of his far too understanding eyes, "I just don't want this to go away."

"It won't. I promise you that."

He sounds so certain that it has her gaze trailing up. He can't know it for sure. No one knows what will happen in the future. But his eyes tell her everything and more. Tomorrow they will figure it out, for now, Regina is quite content to just sleep  
beside a man she never thought she'd see again, one who had stolen her heart the moment his dimples cracked a smile at her.

Licking her lower lip, she bites back a quiet question she hopes Robin won't reject, a simple rather shy, "Kiss me goodnight?" And sure as she already knew in her heart, he smiles that smile and leans down to close the distance between them. It's soft,  
gentler than she's ever experienced before, and he doesn't let her lips go for a few breaths, sucks her lip into his, playfully licks over the lower one, and holds her tight. She hums into it. Breathes in everything that is him. He tastes like spearmint  
and the wine from earlier. And beneath her palm she can feel his heart thundering away. Kissing him is...well amazing. All of him is. The curve of his back, the muscles in his arms she traces with a fingernail, the shiver that rolls through them when  
she trails lower towards his backside, playing with the band of his boxers for a moment before returning back to neutral territory. He's not unaffected by her wanderings either. Groans into another kiss and squeezes her hip tight.

When they pull apart with a soft pop, Regina is grinning like a fool, matching Robin's as he blows a hot breath out of his nose, "I could get very used to that." She burns, aches for more of him to touch more of her, the quench the pulse between her thighs  
that have apparently parted and migrated over his own leg.

"Just think we made a baby together." She teases, pecking his lips once more as he deflates into her hair, "Christ woman. How dare you give me those images to go to sleep with."

"What images?" She pries playfully, damn well knowing his eyes are trained on her silk covered breasts that press against his chest. He shakes his head, nips at her collarbone and rolls them over so he is on top, she against the mattress. The arch in  
his brow has her legs clenching together, the way his body moves with every breath as he roams her body for a moment. "Seems unfair you know?"

"What does?" She tucks a foot over his calf, tucking him fractionally tighter to her hips. Robin whines, nearly whimpers as he slides down over top of her, buries his face into her neck and laces theirs hands together above her head. "Knowing that I have  
seen you naked and I can't remember it."

"I think you did a lot more than see me naked thief." She know's it's ruthless to tease him again, but she can't help it. She feels light and free right now, and it's coming naturally to her, to them. And on cue Robin puffs out hotly, bites at her earlobe  
and blazes a row of affections across her jawline, nipping at her lips when she tries to kiss him again. He dips and she follows, desperate to taste him again, but apparently he too is in a playful mood, and if she is going to test and tease him,  
well clearly it's fair game for him to do the same.

A whine escapes her on the fourth failed attempt to capture his mouth and she huffs, scowls and arches underneath him, wrapping her thighs around his hips, "Play fair Robin."

He grins wolfishly at her, wriggles and settles himself between her thighs, "You started it."

"And I'm about to finish it." She rolls them fast, catching him off guard, and lands squarely on top, straddling him from above with a triumphant smile. Leaning down she kisses him, hard, runs her fingers through his hair and lets her weight go until  
she is laying all over him. "Good night."

Robin chuckles, kisses her again, and lets her slide from his lap to the pillow next to him, grinning like a lovestruck fool the entire time as Regina sighs, rests her head on his shoulder and finally let's sleep claim her. He could very much get used  
to this.

He wakes a little while later to a muffling of words coming from the hallway. Cracking his eyes open, it's not Regina making the noise, she is dead asleep beside him still. The whispers floats through the room again, and the hairs on the back of Robin's  
neck stand up, his mind waking immediately as he searches the dark dim room. They'd left the door open. A crack of light coming from the hallway illuminates a pair of green eyes darkly glaring at him.

It's Henry. He's just standing there, a snarl on his lips as his mouth moves a thousand miles an hour. Robin's gut knots though he lays still, not wanting to scare Regina's son, but the protective side of him begins to creep out. It's not english that  
hits his ears, but a dialect he's never heard. Straining to try and capture something that makes sense, he swears a dark purple pulse of light slides along the wall. Perhaps he is hallucinating. Henry doesn't have magic.

He turns over, but the boy is gone. Beside him Regina reaches for him, blinking her eyes open as Robin stares at the doorway. "What's wrong?" He tears his gaze away and down to her tousled hair and sleep riddled eyes. She smiles lazily at him when he  
shakes his head, muttering a quiet nothing back, and tucks her back into his arms and she is gone within seconds. But Robin doesn't sleep, because something is very very wrong, and he has to tread carefully, Henry is Regina's entire world, questioning  
what he thinks just happened could end up ruining everything he and Regina have built together.

But still, something is wrong.

TBC.


	27. Chapter 27

Prompts from OQPromptParty for TTY

\- Robin takes care of Rose and lets Regina sleep in

\- Regina has a nightmare

* * *

Her fingers slowly stretch out at the sleepy fuzz of night begins to fade away. It's warm, comfy in this bed, the soft goose down blanket curled underneath her chin, her last shield to fight off waking up for good. It's been forever since she has slept that well, who knew all she needed was another warm body beside her, or Robin's body more specifically. Which only reminds her of everything that has happened over the past two months here, over the past two years.

It's a lot to digest, but it seems the idea of her having a baby with Robin goes down a lot easier than she'd expect. Kissing him last night was... it was like she was coming home or finding home. Either way it's certainly something she is going to be doing again.

And speaking of Robin, she stretches her arm out to reach him, only to find empty, cool sheets. Scowling, her eyes finally crack open towards where he is supposed to be sleeping. It's just a vacant, soft dip in the mattress, however.

Maybe he had to leave and get back to camp early?

Running a hand through her hair, Regina sighs, sits up, grimacing at the joints popping with the arch of her back. The blankets slide off, and her eyes fall down the flat of her stomach, a thumb following to run along her ribs at the idea of being pregnant. What did it feel like? Was it an easy pregnancy? Did she have any cravings? She'd love to have those memories back.

Flicking her gaze to the alarm clock, it's nearly 8:45, and she hasn't heard Rose's little morning cries yet. It's odd. Her daughter has always been an early riser - clearly like her father in that respect. She shivers, being out of the cocoon of blankets in nothing but a silk short set isn't exactly insulating material. As she opens the guest room door, she hears a muffling of voices from the kitchen.

She can't help the smile that tugs at her lips at the sound.

Glancing at her reflection in the bathroom mirror as she ties on a robe, the pink tint in her cheeks doesn't go unnoticed, nor does the new strange lightness in her eyes. She has a family, and Henry is here, remembering her, which she never thought could be possible. It's a bit overwhelming in the happiness department for her, a strange, foreign new territory to be in. Maybe Snow and Charming had it right the entire time, being hopelessly enchanted with the idea of a happily ever after might actually have some merit to it.

Not that she is going to toss all her eggs into one basket. Life has taught her that the majority of the time it doesn't last, nor is it filled with rainbows and hearts floating about. Regardless of the cynical streak, she can't help but feel herself skipping down the stairs with a little more bounce than usual, already smiling like a fool as she rounds the corner and sees them hovering around the island countertop. It steals her breath, just the thought of having this.

Roland's sitting on a stool still in his pajamas, hair all muffled and messy as he laughs between mouthfuls of pancakes whilst Rose babbles and wiggles around in Robin's arm as he pops a blueberry in his mouth, chuckling as two tiny hands clap against his stubbled cheeks. It's enough to have tears springing into Regina's eyes. They look so similar; Roland and Rose. Aside from the colour of their eyes, it's all dark chocolate hair that springs out in a multitude of directions, chubby pink cheeks and deep set dimples. There is no doubt they are siblings and both very much their father's children.

"Regina!"

His little squeal of her name tosses her out of the daydreaming state as she grins, bending down to catch the tiny body that throws himself into her arms with a bubbly giggle. Hoisting him onto her hip, her cheek is met with a sticky, wet kiss, no doubt a purple berry stain to her skin now.

She remembers Henry at this age, messy but oh so adorable. "Papa made breakfast!"

"I can see that." She dots a kiss to Roland's curls as they sit together on the stool. The blush that runs through her cheeks as she catches Robin's eyes, heats and tingles, just about sets her entire body on fire when he reaches over to link their fingers together, pulling her palm up to his lips and pressing a softly whispered _Good Morning_ into her skin. If he keeps smiling at her like that, all biting down on his lip, dimples deepening, she is going to melt on the spot.

Between them Rose gurgles boisterously, indignance in her chubby scowl that Regina has yet to acknowledge her - certainly a trait picked up from her mother, as is the tiny scrunch of her nose as she wails again, fat little feet pounding on the countertop in utter impatience.

"My, aren't you a feisty little one in the morning." Robin grins, his fingers tickling against her round belly until she squeals, a toothless smile splitting wide as she squirms against his chest. "Just like your mother," he hushes into the crown of her head, flicking his eyes over to Regina who sputters and coughs on a sip of coffee at the comment. Robin grins at the way her jaw drops and the glare she sends his way.

"I am _not_ feisty."

She pops a blueberry in her mouth, chewing deliberately as Robin smiles wider, his brow cocking high with a teasing, "If you say so, Your Majesty," muffled into Rose's hair. Regina huffs with a heavy rolling of her eyes. He's playing with fire, he must know that as he chuckles lightly before reaching down for a strawberry.

He winks at her, about to toss the fruit into his mouth, but a puff of purple blooms around his fingers, stealing the berry and leaving Robin confused and open mouthed.

"Why you little thief!"

Roland keels over into Regina's chest, laughing at the scowl on Robin's face as Regina takes a long, slow bite out of the stolen fruit, her eyes closing dramatically as she hums about how delicious it is.

She knows Robin is staring at the way her lips pucker against the fruit, the slight dribble of sugar sweet red dribbling down her lip, hears it in the clearing of his throat, low and husky, making her stomach tighten in a rather hot, fluttering way. She likes it. Feeling his eyes on her. It all feels very... natural, having kids situated between them, eating breakfast early on a Saturday mornings together, doing everything they can to not give into each other's temptation. It's good. Having this. It's really, really good.

In Robin's arms, Rose wails a pitiful, whimpering thing that has Regina's eyes popping open, seeing her girl sucking on the pad of Robin's thumb with tears beginning to build in those beautiful, blue eyes. "She's hungry."

Robin _oohs,_ grins with a kiss to his daughters head, and walks over with Rose in tow to her mother, who happily accepts the weighted bundle into her arms as Robin alleviates her of Roland. "I'll clean up, you go feed this growing princess." It's the way he smiles at both of them, a flicker of disbelief crossing his eyes, one that Regina understands for too well. It's new. This family, thrusted upon both of them without a memory of its creation, but all the same, it's what they always dreamed of.

Regina leans into Robin's kiss to the crown of her head, revels in the squeeze to her shoulder before he hoists Roland up into the air, giving their son a toss into the sky as he squeals before returning safely into Robin's arms with the promise of play time in the living room. She watches them go, Rose tucked into her chest quietly.

Slowly, she walks back upstairs, deciding the quiet of her bedroom will be best for Rose's breakfast. Best to not have to explain breastfeeding to Roland. As she passes the nursery, the door is cracked open, a silhouette looming darkly over the crib. Her blood runs cold. Rose whimpers and curls into her arms as Regina scowls at the image of long, ghosting fingers running along the walls, down to caress the white crib.

Her heart pumps heavily as she reaches for the door, a bloom of fire pulses under her palm, innate to the danger that licks up her spine.

"Henry?"

He's crouched over Rose's crib, spinning around on the spot with wide eyes as Regina scours the room quickly. She could have sworn…

"Morning, Mom!"

His arms fly around her, squeezing her a little too tight but she'd never relinquish the feeling of having her son back in her arms. He smiles brightly up at her, pinching his sister's toes as she wiggles about. "Hey, Rosie. She looks lots like you. Robin, too. But definitely like you."

Regina grins, thrumming at the fact her daughter does in fact look much like a miniature version of herself, dimples and eye colour aside. She is a perfect little swirl of mother and father, something Regina is enamoured over.

"What are you doing in here?"

Henry stills, his eyes flaring back towards Rose's crib for a half second before he shrugs, "Just taking it all in, I guess."

It doesn't sit quite right in her gut. But it's new for him. For her too, in all honesty. She can't exactly fault him for being curious about the new life they have. It's normal to be a bit stunned by it all. Henry is only a child and what she thought she saw, the shadow that scraped the wood of the crib, it is only a trick of her imagination. An overwhelmed mind going into overdrive.

"I'm happy I'm home, Mom."

"Me too. I missed you so much."

His smile doesn't quite reach his eyes as he stares at Rose in her arms, his face settling blankly as his fingers run across her tiny tummy. "Did you?"

"What?"

"Did you really miss me?"

His tone unsettles her. The way his expression darkens for a half moment. Maybe they need to talk more about this. Placing Rose down in her crib, Regina swallows thickly before turning back to face Henry who glares at the baby girl wailing at being put down before breakfast.

"Henry." Her fingers find his chin, tipping his gaze towards her. There's a shade of hazel in his eyes she's never seen before, a dark gold circle around his iris'. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine." He responds robotically. "Why wouldn't I be?"

"You think I didn't miss you. Henry, you know you are my entire world." She sniffs hard against the lump in her throat, "I'm lost without you."

"Doesn't seem that way."

"Is this because of Robin?"

He scowls at that name, a vibration skittering across his skin Regina tries not to think too much about.

"Henry, I love you. Robin being here doesn't change that."

"And what about her and Roland?" His chin juts towards Rose who continues to scream in the crib. "Did you replace me with them?"

"No! God, Henry, never! It would be impossible to do that."

His eyes drop from the crib, a deep set frown in his brow cutting Regina to the core. Maybe being a happy family right off the bat isn't going to be quite so easy. Things are different now. It's not just her and Henry anymore, but clearly she's hasn't made enough of an effort to make sure that her first prince isn't feeling left by the wayside.

"I'm sorry, Henry. I am. I didn't plan any of this, but Robin, Roland and Rose are a part of my life now, of our life." She wipes away the tears on her lashes at his rejected expression, "But never for one second think that any of this means I don't love you less."

"Does he love you?"

Her brow raises in question as Henry squares his dark gaze on her.

"Does Robin love you?"

Well... she doesn't know... they haven't told each other that in the past two months exactly... granted they only figured out everything twenty-four hours prior. And even if her heart pumps at the thought of it, she doesn't want to put faith in unspoken words, not yet at least.

"He and I…."

"It's a simple question, Mom."

"No. It's not. We are just figuring this all out."

"So he just, what, got you pregnant and that's it?" He scoffs brashly, something that stuns Regina. He's never spoken to her like this. So harsh and bluntly. Maybe things in New York weren't as happy as she'd hoped.

"Honey, I know this is strange for you."

"It's not." He glowers, and she swears a flicker of dark green skitters through his eyes, "I just - " and then he softens, smiles like her boy used to, "I just don't want you to get hurt again, Mom. We just got each other back." He throws his arms around her waist, hugging her fiercely.

She curls around him, pressing a kiss to his hair, "I know, baby. It's going to be fine, okay? I promise."

Her stomach knots. An unfamiliar feeling with him. This unsettling has to just be shock, or an adjustment for him that, as his mother, she feels. It's her son, Henry is hers, that won't and will never change. It's just going to be a process getting everyone one the same page.

"Do you think he could show me how to shoot a bow and arrow?" He beams up at her, and just like that all the adventure and hope she's normally found in him blossoms beautifully.

"As long as you don't shoot at my apple tree…"

Henry laughs, reaches up on his tiptoes to press a kiss to her cheek, _I love you, Mom_ muffled as he squeezes her tight around her shoulders once more before racing off down the stairs.

It's off. The way he had hugged her just now. Henry wraps his arms around her waist and burrows his head into her chest, she has nearly eleven years of memories of it. Never once have his arms moved up and around her shoulders, around her neck. It's different, and for whatever reason it's not a good different either - not the kind she could easily associate with him just growing up...

Turning back to Rose she tries to not let the lump in her gut balloon any bigger. But anxiety rolls off her in waves as she picks her daughter up, smoothing a palm over the soft dark curls as they settle in the rocking chair. Rose is babbling happily as Regina adjusts them both so that her daughter can finally have breakfast.

She latches on quickly, suckling hard as the chair sways slowly back and forth, little yellow socked feet pushing and pressing lightly into her mother's far bicep, wriggling her way into a comfortable position. Regina sinks into the chair, into the feeling of her daughter's chubby hand on her chest, hoping that it will calm the running of her mind about Henry, about the shadow she swears she saw dancing along the pale walls of the nursery.

Humming softly to a rather content Rose, Regina lets her eyes scan the room, searching for something though she has no idea what she'd be looking for. Everything is untouched, not a stuffed toy out of place, the white mobile still dancing gently over the crib. It really is a beautiful nursery, and she should probably thank Robin one more time for the rocking chair, the time and detail he'd put into the little flower carving on the arm. Even before they realized Rose was his, there he was, loving her anyway in small ways.

They rock, and rock, slow and steady, her heart eventually evening out given that there is nothing suspicious to find in the room. Rose squirms momentarily, unhappy that Regina apparently let her humming melody cease without realizing. Smiling down at the scowl in her daughters brow, she presses a soft kiss to her forehead, wondering how on earth she got so lucky to be this blessed. How is it possible that she and Robin found each other again? It aches deep in her heart that there is so much they don't remember, the beginning of a life together.

"Baby girl, can you show me more?" she whispers against Rose's temple, her hand rubbing soft circles on Rose's protruding full belly, "Can you show me your daddy?" She sees Rose's eyes flick up to hers, bright blue and quizzical, and Regina bites down on her lip with a happy, understanding smile, "Can you show me Ba?"

Pink puffs rise nearly instantly from the hand Rose has on Regina's chest, the little girl's eyes closing softly as Regina inhales deeply, letting a memory take over once again.

 _It's dark, warm and squishy, and she can't really see much around her. Nothing but the framing of a door, a soft orange light beyond, and the sound of hushed muffled voices. Impatience builds in her, before an incensed wail erupts around the room - it's to no avail though, the door doesn't open. So she screams louder, cries out irately for what feels like hours on end, but it works._

 _She sees Robin, bare chested, hair slightly tousled, but grinning softly as he enters, padding quietly and quickly over._

 _It's a bit strange, feeling the size of his hands wrapping around her torso, and Regina has to remind herself she's seeing everything through Rose's eyes, of course his arms would feel like massive logs around her, cradling and tucking her in tight to his chest. He's delightfully warm, smells like heaven, too._

 _"Okay, Rosie, I got you. Settle down, love." He bounces gently, pressing a stubbly kiss to her temple. "It's alright." He shushes her sniffling, runs a hand along her back. It feels wonderful, soothing and down right tranquil hearing his voice hum into her ears, feeling the steady thumping heartbeat underneath her fat cheek. And she'd like to stay this way forever, Regina would, but it appears their daughter is has other ideas - fidgeting and squirming with a small whimper._

 _Robin sighs, almost sadly, as he lifts Rose up a touch higher, securing an arm beneath her padded bottom, "Are you hungry, my love?" Rose kicks her feet against his ribs, lamenting quietly as he turns to walk out of the room. "No? Just need some snuggles then, yeah? Come on, let's go see your mother..."_

 _She recognizes her castle bed chambers immediately, internally cocking a brow at the sight of herself dead asleep under a mammoth of blankets. Robin is right, she looks exhausted. Granted, she remembers the first few months having a newborn Henry, sleep was the last thing she got to indulge in. Still, Robin sits down beside her, blowing a long breath out as his hand runs up her arm. Rose wriggles impatiently, mumbling nonsense into his chest._

 _Smiling, Robin peels the blanket back with one hand, slides his pillow over a touch so he can gently place Rose down on her back beside Regina. Rose babbles sleepily as Robin slides in too, gently landing a hand on Regina's hip. Her eyes flutter open, a small smile creeping into her lips as she sluggishly sits up. "Hey, baby."_

 _"Sorry, didn't mean to wake you." Robin sighs, squeezing Regina's side, "Someone was feeling a bit neglected." He grins down at Rose, her hands fisting a piece of Regina's hair_

 _"It's okay. This is what mommies do right? All hours." She smiles down at Rose, her eyes lighting up, though the dark circles hang heavy beneath. She tugs her hair from Rose's mouth, replacing the curl with a finger instead. In her periphery she sees Robin's hand start running long strokes up and down Regina's back, his forehead dropping into the pillow. He too looks like he's about to drop dead from exhaustion._

 _"How are you feeling?"_

 _"Nervous." Regina shrugs. "You?"_

 _Robin nods as he peers down at Rose who is beyond content suckling Regina's thumb. His own presses into the arch of her tiny foot, fingers wrapping gently around her calf. "I know that we all agreed this is for the best, but I—"_

 _"I know." Regina cuts him off quietly, a hard sniff following the wetness that builds in her eyes. "I don't want to lose this, yet we have no choice."_

 _"It's only temporary, we will figure it out."_

 _"We won't have these memories though, Robin. Doing this is going to steal it all away, and we'll be back where we started."_

 _He sighs, sits up to land a kiss to Regina's forehead and lets his hand slide over Rose's stomach., "I know, and I am not thrilled about being apart from either of you. A lot has happened these past few months, we've lost a lot, and maybe being back in Storybrooke is the right decision?"_

 _A tear slips from Regina's eyes._

 _Through Rose, she feels the slight pitter patter of rain dotting her skin, a strange ghosting spark that tickles everywhere. She knows that feeling, soft gentle drops that flicker with magic. It's beyond familiar, yet so far away._

 _"This isn't going to be easy, Regina, b. But, we just have to have hope that we will find each other again."_

 _"Hope has never really worked out for me." She swallows heavily, feeling her heart sink. "How can I when I lost him?"_

 _"What happened with Reid isn't your fault. You were protecting Snow."_

 _"I lost our son in the process. He died because I—"_

 _"No, Regina, Sarah took Reid. There was nothing you could have done."_

 _She hears Regina's tight sob, feels the way she leans back into Robin's arms, and the memory starts to fade out slowly, swirling back into the brightness of daylight into the nursery._

Rose is staring up at her, wide eyed and waiting as Regina's heart thumps frantically in her throat. They had a son. Another baby she lost, or he was taken from them, or something she doesn't understand.

Her tears fall heavily, the breath whooshing out of her lungs.

They had a boy, another child. Rain - it was the feeling of her son's magic.

She feels the light press of Rose's foot against her stomach, there is supposed to be a matching twin, a brother cradled into her arms at the same time. There are supposed to be two of them.

"Oh God." The words fall wet and trembling as she curls Rose into her chest, tears spilling over onto the yellow onesie her daughter wears. "Oh God, Oh God."

They had another baby. She had another son. Robin's son. Their son. Reid.

The thought spins wildly in her head

"Regina?" Warm hands find her thighs, a panicked voice barely reaching her as she tries to catch a hard sob. "Regina, tell me what's wrong. What happened?" His hands stroke up her arms gently, over Rose's back and then around again. Over and over as she cries and cries, to the point where she feels like she can't breathe, the rattling burn in her lungs becoming unbearable. "Please, Regina, say something."

She pulls back, vision blurred by the tears, but she can make out his eyes, wild and alarmed, bright blue and absolutely terrified. Did Reid have his father's eyes? Was he to look just like Robin? Her throat tightens, stomach rolling over itself, the feeling of bile creeping up into her mouth.

"Who is Sarah?"

TBC.


End file.
